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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23699734">Dancing Detectives and the Missing Case of the Insignificantly Small Diamond 👀</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/1AbbyNewth5/pseuds/1AbbyNewth5'>1AbbyNewth5</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF, Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series), markiplier - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>80's Music, A Heist With Markiplier references, Abe is gay pass it on, Angst and Feels, Blood and Injury, Bromance, Dark really needs their own tag, Detectives, Dreams and Nightmares, Dreams vs. Reality, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Darkiplier Rights, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Multi, Musicians, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Scars, Trippy reading, cuz why not, many references, terrible movies</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:41:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>81,922</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23699734</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/1AbbyNewth5/pseuds/1AbbyNewth5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Detective Abe tries to drag Wilford 'Motherloving' Warfstache along for a new case that's been spread around the city. An incredibly small diamond is missing! It's up to Abe and Wilford to find this diamond before it gets smashed into a billion tinier pieces! But maybe the diamond has a reason to go missing… find out with the worst-best detectives in the world!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Abe | The Detective/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel, Celine | The Seer/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel, Damien | The Mayor/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel, Darkiplier/Wilford Warfstache</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. A Whole New Case</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Poke.</p><p>“Wilford…”</p><p>Poke poke poke.</p><p>“Wilford.”</p><p>Poke poke poke pokity pokey poke.</p><p>“<em>Wiiiiiiilllllfoooorrrd~ </em>”</p><p>A hand swipes up from underneath a mountain of blankets.</p><p>“no” a voice grumbled. “no thank you”</p><p>The detective pulled back a blanket slowly.</p><p>“You wanna see something neat?” he asked quietly.</p><p>“does it involve roller blades and wolverine claws” the voice asked flatly, clearly tired and dazed. That was weirdly specific.</p><p>“What would happen if I said no?” the detective asked, pulling back three other blankets.</p><p>The sleepy man tucked himself in with what was left of the blankets covering him up. “then i want no part of it”</p><p>“Aw come on!” the detective exclaimed, quickly losing the calm morning quietness in his voice (even though it was five in the morning). “You don’t wanna see what I made and researched about all night?”</p><p>“not really” the comfy cozy man was clinging on the last two blankets. “you should know how to get me out of bed by now, abe”</p><p>“Right,” Abe said, reaching over to yoink one of the pillows. “I think I lost your CD in my car or something.”</p><p>A finger pointed over in a certain direction. “music time”</p><p>Abe rolled his eyes, snatching a pillow from the head of his friend while walking over to his desk.</p><p>“1 or 2 today?” Abe asked.</p><p>“jackson 5”</p><p>“Volume 1 it is.”</p><p>Abe took a CD out of a case labeled “Wilford’s mix Vol. 1”, and inserted it in a player. The rolling piano from the beginning of the Jackson 5’s <em> I Want You Back </em> suddenly makes Wilford Warfstache spring up from the bed.</p><p>“<em>GOOD MORNING, ABE~! </em>”</p><p>Thank goodness for Wilford’s strange mood swings. He had only been up for all of about five seconds, and he was already grinning like a loon. “So, what are we doin’ today?”</p><p>“I was going to tell you, but you said you wanted no part of it-”</p><p>“Aw, you know I wasn’t awake yet.” His grin was almost infectious.</p><p>“Get dressed first, moron.”</p><p>Wilford just clicked his tongue. “Ah, you’re no fun! Fine.”</p><p>He turned around and started pulling his shirt off, and the detective sighed, walking out of the room. He could hear the madman chuckling softly.</p><p>The CD player was turned up so much that Abe heard <em> Smooth Criminal </em> from NOT the Jackson 5, but one of them is much older singing it, playing from the other room. Wilford skidded his feet across the floor, keeping his hair over his eyes to pretend it’s a hat that the singer would have in the music video.</p><p>“Mornin’,” Wilford grinned.</p><p>He’s just wearing the same outfit as he did last night… and the night before. And the week before that. And months to decades before that. For somebody on the run from the police, he’s pretty good at hiding, huh?</p><p>
  <em> Get a wardrobe change, old man. </em>
</p><p>“I will, when you decide to get rid of the leather aesthetic,” Wilford replied cheerily.</p><p>“No,” Abe snapped, suddenly defensive. “It’s comfy.”</p><p>“It <em> stretches </em> with the most <em> annoying </em>sound in the world!”</p><p>“My wallet is leather and you play with it all the time,” Abe replied, and Wilford crossed his arms.</p><p>“There’s a difference.”</p><p>Not really.</p><p>Abe sighed, rubbing his temple. “Okay, there is. Anyway, I gotta show you something.”</p><p>“What’s the something?” Wilford asked, suddenly having a glass of milk in his hand with a straw. And then a cookie. And then the milk was suddenly chocolate.</p><p><em> Stop that, </em> Abe made a face. Wilford just stuck his tongue out.</p><p>“I wanna see the thing!”</p><p>“You wanna see the thing?” Abe asked, slowly grinning at Wilford’s excitement.</p><p>“<em>I WANNA SEE THE THING! </em> ” he shouted, somehow not spilling his drink. Abe could only imagine how Wilford would have woken up without the music. It <em> was </em>five in the morning, after all. Wilford needs fun energy.</p><p>The two repeated “You wanna see the thing?” and “I wanna see the thing!” over and over again down the hall to Abe’s office.</p><p>“You ready to see the thing?” Abe asked, tugging on his doorknob.</p><p>“Always!” Wilford exclaimed, almost crushing his cookie. Liar.</p><p>As soon as Abe opened the door to his office, Wilford <em> might </em>have built up his excitement too much. The room is filled with what you’d expect any other detective’s room to be filled with. Tabs, cork boards, red strings all over the place, leading to a bunch of seemingly unrelated photos (a suspicious amount of them were dedicated to clowns), newspaper clippings, and really bad drawings. His desk, as always, was a mess.</p><p>Wilford’s smile dropped. Seriously? Again with the obsessed stuff? As soon as he was about to ask those questions out loud, Abe stuck a finger against Wilford’s face.</p><p>“<em>Hear me out! </em>”</p><p>Wilford put a hand on his hip. “Dude, the <em> last </em> time you did this, you thought you were a prison warden and disappeared for <em> months </em>-”</p><p>“That’s not important right now!” Abe exclaimed, seemingly excited about whatever the hell he was researching.</p><p>Wilford sighed dramatically, sipping through his straw, which was now one of those cereal straws you saw in the early 2000’s Fruit Loop commercials. “Proceed.”</p><p>Abe clapped his hands together, with Wilford knowing that this will be a long rant about something he had never heard about before. Eh. At least it was entertaining.</p><p>“There’s this tiny diamond, right? And a bunch of people dug this up from underground almost a thousand years ago, and it was kept in a museum deemed as the most important small diamond of all time. I don’t know the real importance of it, but I KNOW it’s important! And guess what?”</p><p>“What?” Wilford pretended to be interested.</p><p>“Just a few days ago, <em> it went missing! </em>”</p><p>Dramatic, canned gasp. Wilford blew some bubbles in his milk. Abe kept a face on with his arms out, expecting Wilford to be excited.</p><p>“... Oh nooooo…” Wilford muttered, belatedly. “What a predicameeeeeent…!”</p><p>Abe put his arms down. “Come on, you’re not the least bit worried about this diamond?”</p><p>“Not really?” Wilford shrugged. “Why should I be worried about the tiniest jewel in the world? Wasn’t it destined to go missing or getting stolen? In fact, why would <em> any </em>body steal a tiny diamond if you can’t see it?”</p><p>“Well that’s my theory anyway,” Abe replied. “Instead of it going missing, it’s <em> stolen </em>.”</p><p>“Same thing,” Wilford said, with his mouth full from his cookie.</p><p>The detective went over to a corkboard, pointing at a paper filled with a bunch of nonsense. “I can read some stuff about it to you.”</p><p>Wilford sat down at Abe’s desk. “Knock yourself out, buddy.”</p><p>“Fine, I will.” Abe was smiling again, for <em> some </em> reason. Maybe because a missing diamond that was destined to be missing is exciting to him? Maybe he still really likes mystery stuff that Wilford could care less about? Definitely.</p><p>An hour passed, which felt like a whole <em> day, </em> with Abe reading about the diamond, explaining its “importance”. Wilford spun himself around in Abe’s chair to try to keep himself awake. This was so <em> boring… </em> Could a person <em> die </em> from <em> boredom </em> ? In Wilford’s world, <em> yes. </em></p><p>Another hour passed, and Abe slammed the desk, making Wilford jolt awake.</p><p>“AND <em> THAT’S </em> WHY IT’S SO IMPORTANT TO FIND THIS DIAMOND!!!” the detective had a crazed look on his face. Wilford blinked.</p><p>“Or else the world is gonna explode?” he asked with a tiny voice.</p><p>“No, it’s a whole lesson about how even the smallest person can make a big change,” Abe explained. “Were you even listening at all?”</p><p>“... Yessssss.”</p><p>Abe gave him a look.</p><p>“... Noooooo…” Wilford’s head was down, not feeling ashamed because he didn’t listen, but because Abe’s exposition about this diamond was corny as hell.</p><p>Abe sighed. “Well, long story short, this diamond and its symbolism were able to help a lot of people for a very long time.”</p><p>Oh. That was an easier explanation than the last two hours.</p><p>“Well, I’m sure other people are already so busy finding this thing,” Wilford leaned back, with his glass somehow being refilled. “You know you don’t have to worry about it.”</p><p>“I still want to help find it, though,” Abe replied, pausing for a few seconds. “And I want you to come with me.”</p><p>Wilford blinked again. “What? Why me?”</p><p>“‘Cause you’re good company,” Abe said, shrugging with his hands in his pockets.</p><p>“No, I got that already, I am amazing, but…” Wilford waved a hand in many directions. “Why me? I’m the least detectively person you ever met.”</p><p>“Because you’re ridiculously observant and it’s boring doing this sort of thing all by myself,” Abe admitted. “And I don’t have to worry about you dying on me.”</p><p>Huh. That was almost nice… maybe it wouldn’t hurt to play along, at least for now. This could still be really fun, especially if Abe gave up halfway through again so that they could have a proper breakfast. Maybe Wilford could talk Abe into getting some waffles.</p><p>The detective had already wandered out of the room, ranting on about diamonds once again. Because of course, he had. People like Wilford and Abe probably don’t have to eat all the time anyway… but it’s fun.</p><p>Once Wilford finished his glass for the fourth time in a row, Abe came back in with his jacket on. “Come on, bud.”</p><p>“Where are we going?” Wilford asked, sitting up.</p><p>“To the museum that held the diamond,” Abe replied, casually pulling out a coffee cup from his pocket. “We’re gonna ask some of the employees about what they think happened to it.”</p><p>Wilford swung his legs off of Abe’s desk to stand. “Next thing we know, somebody’s gonna steal some weird box thing that can alter reality.”</p><p>“Probably not,” Abe said. “That’s only a thing in old movies or weird mockumentaries, like that crap you like to watch on YouTube.”</p><p>“Still fun to think about though!”</p><p>Next thing they knew, the two were already sitting in Abe’s car. It wasn’t the most fabulous thing, but it was his baby and he took care of it. Briefcases full of very important documents fell off of it on a few occasions, but it was a minor thing to worry about. Right now, Abe and Wilford have to think about the diamond.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Fun fact, this whole fic takes place in 2012... So it's gonna be a bit weird to imagine Wilford not in his usual suspenders attire.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. A Mystery with... Not Markiplier</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<em>JUST </em> <em> TAKE </em> <em> THOSE </em> <em> OLD </em> <em> RE</em><em>CORDS </em> <em> OFF </em> <em> THE </em> <em> SHELF! </em> <em> I’LL </em> <em> SIT </em> <em> AND </em> <em> LIS</em><em>TEN </em> <em> TO </em> <em> ‘EM </em> <em> BY </em> <em> MY </em> <em> SELF! </em> <em> TO </em> <em> DAY’S </em> <em> MU</em><em>SIC </em> <em> AIN’T </em> <em> GOT </em> <em> THE </em> <em> SAME </em> <em> SOUL! </em> <em> I </em> <em> LIKE </em> <em> THAT </em> <em> OLD </em> <em> TIME </em> <em> ROCK </em> <em> AND </em> <em> ROLL! </em>”</p><p>The two friends were screeching what vaguely sounded like the lyrics of a very old song by Bob Seger. They honestly sounded pretty decent, and what they lacked in skill, they made up for in volume. Wilford was also sitting upside down in the front passenger seat. That’s… safe.</p><p>As soon as the song ended, the two calmed themselves down and rested their throats for a minute or two. Abe glanced over and finally noticed Wilford sitting wrong.</p><p>“Wilford, come on. You’re gonna get yourself sick.”</p><p>Wilford sat up correctly in seconds. “Mmm?”</p><p>Abe clung onto his wheel. “Never mind.”</p><p>Wilford held onto his head, giggling. “WOOOOoooOOOooooO… that song is very fun…!”</p><p>“Just don’t throw up in my car.”</p><p>Wilford’s head slowly waved around, and he tried to salute. “Aye aye, captain…”</p><p>Sort of subconsciously, Abe slowed the car down so it’d be easier on Wilford’s head… and hopefully his stomach. Again, the car is Abe’s baby, and throwing up is gross.</p><p>“We almost there?” Wilford asked as soon as his voice got more pepped.</p><p>“Almost.”</p><p>They were already there, and Abe went quiet. “Oh. That was quick.”</p><p>Wilford giggled as soon as they both got out of the car.</p><p>The museum was huge, with big windows on one side of the front, and the other side is just concrete that is practically <em> begging </em> for someone to put a grappling hook on the top of it sooner or later.</p><p>… Or they could just walk inside through the front doors like normal people. They were wide open. Yeah. That sounds like a good idea.</p><p>Abe strolled right in as Wilford hopped over the metal line that divided the inside of the museum and outside. He still probably felt a bit woozy from sitting upside down, but at least he still has all the energy to make this case interesting. “Let’s gooooooo…!”</p><p>The two were walking and looking around in the museum, passing by a few small crowds of people. Wilford pointed at an explosives room, and Abe sighed. “You and </p><p>ancient bombs are a disaster waiting to happen.”</p><p>“But one of them is called Crazy Mick’s Ass-Blasting Fireworks! They’re obviously trustworthy!”</p><p>“What does a guy named ‘Mick’ have to do with anything?” Abe asked.</p><p>“<em>EVERYTHING.</em>” Abe gave Wilford a look, and he kicked nothing from the floor. “I just know a guy named Mick, and he’s great with blowing up stuff. You would like him! He’s nice.”</p><p>“A’ight.” Abe took Wilford by the arm and led him away from the room holding the bombs. Crazy Mick definitely probably died from his own explosives. At the corner of his eye, Abe spotted an employee. “Hey uh, excuse me!”</p><p>“What?” The (surprisingly British) employee seemed a bit flinchy. “Is there anything I can do for you two?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Abe replied, letting go of Wilford’s arm. “We just came in to see if we’d be able to help with the missing small diamond case-”</p><p>He showed the guard his credentials.</p><p>“Oh, of course,” the man with the name tag ‘Gavin’ said, walking over to the two. “Everyone around the city is going to big search parties for this thing.”</p><p>Abe kept peering over his shoulder to check on Wilford. He was just looking around the lobby, not causing a ruckus… yet? Here’s to hoping he behaves and is helpful.</p><p>“Do you have any idea what happened with the diamond?” Abe asked.</p><p>“Oh, <em> every </em>body’s clueless!” Gavin exclaimed. “We all checked the security camera for the room it was in, and right around the time it was gone, the camera just glitched out and died on us.”</p><p>Huh.</p><p>“Got any of that, Wilford?” Abe looked over and saw Wilford standing near a big chessboard. A small child is staring up at him with their parents watching close behind. Wilford made a goofy face at the child, and they began laughing. Abe snapped his fingers to get Wilford’s attention. He bent down and led the child - in a fit of giggles - over to their parents. Wilford waved at them and hopped from the chessboard to Abe.</p><p>“That was adorable, Wilford, but we need to focus,” Abe said.</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted. “Huh? What are we doing?”</p><p>Abe tried not to sigh- he should have expected as much. “... Dude, I literally just told you. The diamond?”</p><p>A slow, dawning look before Wilford nodded quickly, with enthusiasm. “Ohhhh- ohhhhhh…! Yeah- ‘m on it, Abe!”</p><p>He was gone before Abe could even finish blinking.</p><p>The guard blinked, his gaze trained on Will’s almost cartoonish, smoky outline. “... What just happened?”</p><p>“Don’t worry about it. Is it alright if we go to the room that holds the diamond?”</p><p>“I don’t see why not.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. In Which a Pink Man Gets Fingerprints all Over the Crime Scene</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The guard led the two detectives (one in air quotes- “dEtEcTiVe”) to a door that is blocked by police tape.</p><p>“It’ll be alright if you two come in here,” Gavin said. “Does the pink one have any credentials?”</p><p>Wilford raised a finger. “N-”</p><p>“Yeah,” Abe bluffed, “Tons of ‘em.”</p><p>Gavin peered at Wilford. He then made a face at Abe like “Are you sure?” Abe nodded. The guard shrugged and grabbed a key from his vest pocket. He shuffled a bit of the tape away from the lock and turned it. Wilford’s head perked as he heard the door unlock. The door slowly opened inwards, but the tape was in place from the door frame.</p><p>“Just crawl through the tape and you both can-” Gavin stopped himself as the police tape was taken down, and Wilford was already roaming around in the room.</p><p>“Wilford!” Abe shouted. He turned back to the guard before he’d go after Wilford. “We’ll let you know if we find anything.”</p><p>“Same thing to you,” Gavin tipped his hat. “I’ll leave the door open for you guys.”</p><p>He scuttled away as fast as he could, and Abe grabbed Wilford by his sweater’s hood.</p><p>“Hey, easy-!” he choked.</p><p>“What the hell, man?” Abe asked. “This is a crime scene! You can’t just take down police tape like that!”</p><p>“I didn’t wanna waste time like bending over a bunch of it,” Wilford brushed Abe’s hand away. He opened his mouth to reply, but then just shook his head.</p><p>“Forget about it,” he muttered. “We’re in the room where the diamond went missing, so… I guess we should look for evidence.”</p><p>“If there even <em> is </em> evidence,” Wilford rolled his eyes. “The diamond is so small, so should there even be <em> any</em>thing remaining in this room?”</p><p>Abe went over to the medium-sized podium with the glass box over a velvet pillow inside, with a clear indent.</p><p>“Who knows?” Abe asked. “All I got from the guard guy is that the camera died before it was gone.”</p><p>Wilford was down on his knees near the floor, probably trying to get a feel for anything particularly small. “How do we know that the diamond is missing? It’s so tiny, would anybody know the difference?”</p><p>“Because it’s not there anymore, Wilford.” Abe kept his eyes close to the glass, searching for fingerprints.</p><p>“No, I mean… <em> really,</em>” Wilford replied, brushing on dust and pebbles. “If this diamond is so tiny, how would anybody know it’s missing?”</p><p>“Look up,” Abe said, suddenly with his voice in a lighter tone. “There’s a window in the ceiling.”</p><p>Wilford got on a knee, seeing Abe reading something on the podium. “Huh?”</p><p>“‘Every time the sun focuses on the diamond in this room, it will glow and shine in multiple directions,’” Abe read out loud. Wilford got up to his feet to go over to the podium. </p><p>“So it’s a baby disco ball?” he asked.</p><p>“I guess so,” Abe replied. “There aren’t any markings on the glass, so this obviously wasn’t touched, or scratched.”</p><p>“Maybe somebody had gloves on?” Wilford asked, leaning down closer to the glass. He then chuckled. “People are going on search parties for a diamond so small that maybe it isn’t even missing! It probably just fell off the pillow!”</p><p>“I’d like to think so,” Abe smiled. “But I guess we can’t know for sure.”</p><p>Wilford paused, looking at Abe through the glass. “Yeah, we can.”</p><p>Abe blinked at him. “What?”</p><p>The glass box was already getting lifted up from Wilford. Abe gripped at what little hair he had on his head and gritted his teeth. “<em>Wilford! </em> What are you doing?!”</p><p>“We have to look for evidence, right?” Wilford asked, raising an eyebrow. “<em>Nothing </em> is in this room as far as I can tell, and now we have to know if it’s under its pillow so we can tell everybody they’re freaking out over nothing.”</p><p>“<em>You can’t just touch the evidence, Wilford! </em>”</p><p>“Of course I can! I’m doing it right now! I’m gonna see if it’s under the pillow!”</p><p>Cue the facepalm. “Wilford- just- I’m going to go get some coffee.”</p><p>The detective walked off, leaving the reporter alone in the room where the diamond should have been. The room was quiet now without the guard and his friend- a sliver of light from the window was resting on the podium, but without the diamond, it just looked like someone had laid a fancy purple pillow on top of a big block of painted wood.</p><p>The room looked serene, peaceful. It was kind of sad.</p><p>Wilford carefully set the glass case down on the floor, peering closer at the velvet pillow. There has certainly been <em> something </em> valuable sitting on it, as Abe had said, but it wasn’t there anymore. Wilford stepped back from the podium, looking up at the window again. “Let’s see…”</p><p>Pulling out his phone, he looked up the name of the museum, navigating to its website and looking at the photos of the exhibits. One of them was from the same room he was in, with light from the window shining onto the podium- the entire room was cloaked in a rainbow of colors. Another was a close-up of the velvet pillow, with a teenie, tiny blood-red stone sitting on top.</p><p>Why would such a tiny stone be so valuable?</p><p>He began to pace the room, looking at the little placards inside of the exhibit. Other, much bigger diamonds with lots of different colors were still snug in their glass cases- why hadn’t they been targeted?</p><p>He looped back to the podium, crouching down to look at the placard.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>The Fishbach Diamond, measuring 6.127 carats (when it was uncut, it is presumed to have been around 15 carats based on historical photographs), is the largest red diamond in existence. Every time the sun focuses on the diamond in this room, it will glow and shine in multiple directions. The history of this diamond traces back to over a thousand years ago when two brothers named Jim unearthed the diamond and gave it to their sister as a gift. It stayed in the family for generations, crossing continents and changing hands with the times, until the last heirs, also twins, were found killed at the home of a friend. As neither sibling had any remaining family, the diamond was donated to the museum in 1922. Since then, the diamond has been a beacon of positivity and light for people who feel small all around the world.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford had to reread the placard a few times, for he’d gotten lost in a few bits and pieces, but once he finally finished, his only thought was, <em> Huh… neat. </em></p><p>He stood up straight, looking at the pillow again. He gently lifted it up and saw nothing. He ran his hand across the top of the podium to get a feel for anything. Nothing. He stared at the pillow for a moment, and squashed it all around in certain areas to feel something, at least <em> something, </em> small and hard inside of all the stuffing. Nothing.</p><p>Wilford pushed a sigh out through his lips, and plopped the pillow back on the podium, along with the glass box. He sat down in front of the podium with his legs crossed.</p><p>“This is what it takes to be a detective, I suppose,” Wilford mumbled, seeing Abe talking with a different (and also British!) employee from outside. He seemed to get very excited about something. Wilford watched Abe and the guard chat for a few minutes.</p><p>“Oh… so it was perfectly okay to take the glass off…?”</p><p>“I mean, for employees anyway. Every day, we take turns to clean the box if anybody’s touched it, but from what we saw the day after the diamond was missing, there weren’t any markings on it at all. Not even little fluff remains from gloves.”</p><p>“Huh… But police authorities would take the glass off of it as well too, to check for clues, right?”</p><p>“No, actually. Your pink friend over there is the first one to actually do that.”</p><p>Wilford saw the employee pointing at him, so he waved hello. Abe waved back, feeling a bit ashamed. He <em> probably </em> should have asked the last employee if it was alright to move the glass box. Having to break a few rules, though, is what it takes to be a detective sometimes.</p><p>“Can you take us to the camera surveillance room?”</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted at that. Why would he want to go see footage of the night the diamond went missing even though the camera died???</p><p>
  <em> We could probably figure out who tampered with the camera then, at the very least. </em>
</p><p>“Now you’re thinking like a detective and not like a jackass!” Wilford called out, cupping his hands around his mouth.</p><p>Abe shrugged. “<em>Somebody’s </em> gotta do it! Now come on, we can at least try.”</p><p>Wilford rolled his eyes and got up to his feet. “You owe me waffles after this.”</p><p>“Remind me to get you the biggest stack.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Wilford is a Latent Technological Genius</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I’m gonna actually try if it’s a ghost.”</p><p>“Why a ghost?”</p><p>“Glitchy techno ghosts are everywhere in movies nowadays! There’s static everywhere, and then the screen goes black, and then it goes, <em> poof-</em>”</p><p>“A fictional trend isn’t the reason the camera died, Wilford.”</p><p>“<em>Maybe, </em> though.”</p><p>“Sure.” Clearly Wilford had been going to the theatre too much. But whatever. Abe preferred Netflix, anyways.</p><p>The employee Dan jingled with a few keys and opened the door to the camera surveillance room. Everything was dark, and the only light source was coming from a few screens up on the walls. “Knock yourselves out. Let me know if you need help with anything.”</p><p>What was with employees leaving strangers in important rooms? Both Abe and Wilford brushed that thought off their minds. Abe looked through some of the security feeds, trying to figure out how all of the buttons worked.</p><p>“Did he tell you which screen you’re supposed to look at?” Wilford asked over Abe’s shoulder.</p><p>“While we were on our way here, yeah,” Abe replied. “Camera 56.”</p><p>He tapped a monitor, which had a little red Post-It note on it. Wilford leaned over to try to read it through the brightness of the screen. “‘Must watch at all times’. I mean… watching over a missing diamond might be more important than that box over there.”</p><p>Wilford then pointed over to a different monitor, labeled “Camera 31”. It was zoomed in the aforementioned box. It had a blue jewel on the top center of it. Abe chuckled.</p><p>“Must be <em> very </em> important,” he said, almost in a mocking way. “None of the other items have an entire camera dedicated to it.”</p><p>“Or a whole <em> room,</em>” Wilford added, setting his chin on Abe’s shoulder. The detective looked at him but did nothing to discourage the gesture.</p><p>“I think we should have asked the guy to stay with us because I don’t know <em> anything </em> about cameras,” Abe mumbled.</p><p>Wilford stared down at all of the buttons and keyboards, and backed up at the screen. He got off of Abe’s shoulder almost reluctantly. “Lemme try.”</p><p>He reached over to the controls, tapping at a few keys. Both Wilford and Abe blinked up at the screen, that was suddenly rewinding quickly. As Wilford had predicted, there was some weird sort of static clipping.</p><p>“Whoa whoa whoa, go back!” Abe exclaimed, shaking Wilford by the shoulder.</p><p>“Ah-! Hold on a second!” Wilford’s fingers were fiddling sporadically. “I’m not great at this yet!”</p><p>Practically guessing, Wilford pressed a green button with an arrow that pointed to the right. CLEARLY he’s never seen a button that fast-forwards before. Abe guessed as well, pausing the footage. Wilford pressed the green button again, and the time on Camera 56’s footage went by very, very slowly.</p><p>Something weird was going on.</p><p>As much as Wilford didn’t like to be so quiet, he and Abe kept their mouths shut, watching the footage on the monitor. Around the 1:47 AM mark, the diamond was glowing from the moonlight above.</p><p><em> It didn’t say it would happen in the MOONLIGHT! </em> Wilford silently pouted. <em> Stupid palcard! </em></p><p>
  <em> It’s ‘PLA-card’. </em>
</p><p>The two kept themselves quiet once the time on the monitor’s footage was about to strike 1:49 AM. Then, a suited figure was standing in front of the podium. Abe’s grip on Wilford’s shoulder tightened, but both tried to keep each other’s composure steady. The figure’s head turned towards the camera, and Abe just barely got a glimpse of dark hair and even darker eyes as the footage shut itself off. The monitor was still on, though… so the camera didn’t necessarily die. It was just… weird.</p><p>The screen turned itself back on, with the figure and diamond gone. No glow was in the exhibit anymore. Just darkness.</p><p>Wilford and Abe simultaneously stared at each other with wide eyes.</p><p>“I <em> knew </em> it…” Wilford whispered. “Techno ghosts…”</p><p>Imagine how quick all of that was in normal time.</p><p>Scrolling back again, they tried to study the few microseconds of footage they had of the probable perpetrator.</p><p> </p><ul>
<li><strong>Almost the same height of the podium/Wilford when he has his wig on</strong></li>
<li><strong>Probably really likes the Portal blue and red/orange aesthetic</strong></li>
<li><strong>Black/gray suit</strong></li>
<li><strong>Black hair, black eyes</strong></li>
<li><strong>Possibly got the camera messed up???</strong></li>
<li><strong>Possible gray body paint obsession??? Maybe reads Homestuck?</strong></li>
<li>What does Homestuck have to do with this Abe</li>
<li><strong>Just being observant</strong></li>
<li>I got an observation</li>
<li>SPOOKY TECHNO GHOST THING TOOK THE DIAMOND!!!!</li>
<li>SO WHY ARE WE TAKING NOTES?!</li>
<li><strong>EVIDENCE!</strong></li>
</ul><p> </p><p>“THEN WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?!” Wilford asked out loud, throwing his pen and notes all over the keyboards, and ran to the door. “Let’s find this thing!”</p><p>“We don’t know where this person is, though!” Abe exclaimed, making Wilford skid his feet to stop. “If it even <em> is </em> a person, that is… I think we have to research a bit about them before we try to find them.”</p><p>“And THEN we’ll get the diamond back!”</p><p>“That’s the plan!” Abe grinned.</p><p>Wilford whooped. This is when being a detective gets a little more interesting- even Wilford had to admit it once he and Abe got back in the car, he usually liked this bit. “I always thought it was this exciting in the movies!”</p><p>“Yeah, but nobody in the movies ever has to do paperwork, either,” Abe muttered, turning the car on. “It’s kind of like being a cop, but you don’t have to deal with prisoners a whole lot more than the usual guard.”</p><p>“You gotta guard people?”</p><p>Abe shrugged. “Sorta do, sorta don’t. I guess it depends on what the commotion is, and who I have to check on the most. And you <em> know </em> who I’ve been checking on the most.”</p><p>Wilford shook his head. “No, I don’t. Is it that one guy that broke into your refrigerator?”</p><p>Abe glanced at Wilford for a long moment. “... You, Wilford.”</p><p>“Flatterer.” Wilford tried to reach over to pinch Abe’s cheek, but it was quickly brushed away.</p><p>“Yeah yeah yeah,” Abe mumbled. “You helped me a lot, though, so… I guess I gotta thank you for that part.”</p><p>Wilford had his hands against his chest. “My pleasure!”</p><p>The detective’s cheeks were now a curious tint of pink. Maybe it was Wilford’s mustache reflecting on him. Or something. Sure.</p><p>It’s been about a few decades since Abe stopped his game of Cat and Mouse with Wilford. A lot of different things have happened to the two of them, Abe doesn’t quite remember the most important details, but he knows that he was obsessed with hunting Will down for quite some time… almost to an unhealthy point.</p><p>Cultivating their friendship had been… strange for Abe. He hadn’t really had time for a relationship, or any sort of friendship for that matter. Chasing Wilford had taken up a lot of his time, and without that… he hadn’t really known what to do.</p><p>Wilford had helped him in a lot of ways.</p><p>Clearing his throat, the detective turned back to the dashboard, his hands on the steering wheel. “Alright, let’s head back to my place.”</p><p>…</p><p>“<em>DON’T </em><em>TRY </em><em>TO </em><em>TAKE </em><em>ME </em><em>TO </em><em>A </em><em>DIS</em><em>CO! </em><em>YOU’LL </em><em>NE</em><em>VER</em><em> E</em><em>VEN </em><em>GET </em><em>ME </em><em>OUT </em><em>ON</em> <em>THE </em><em>FLOOR! </em><em>IN </em><em>TEN </em><em>MIN</em><em>UTES, </em><em>I’LL </em><em>BE </em><em>LATE </em><em>FOR </em><em>THE </em><em>DOOR! </em><em>I </em><em>LIKE </em><em>THAT </em><em>OLD </em><em>TIME </em><em>ROCK </em><em>AND </em><em>ROLL! </em>”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Abe Discovers How to use Reddit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As soon as the two detectives (one of them no longer in air quotes - for the moment) got back to Abe’s apartment, Abe immediately headed to his office while Wilford went in the kitchen, probably to make coffee or to release his energy out in private.</p><p>Abe sat in his chair while pulling his notebook out of his jacket. He snatched a marker from a cup labeled “#2 Detective, #1 Friend” gifted from Wilford. Abe used it to hold pencils and pens, because he liked it. Definitely. Absolutely.</p><p>Abe turned his computer on, with his notebook open with the latest things he and Wilford wrote down.</p><p> </p><ul>
<li><strong>Almost the same height of the podium/Wilford when he has his wig on</strong></li>
<li><strong>Probably really likes the Portal blue and red/orange aesthetic</strong></li>
<li><strong>Black/gray suit</strong></li>
<li><strong>Black hair, black eyes</strong></li>
<li><strong>Possibly got the camera messed up???</strong></li>
<li><strong>Possible gray body paint obsession??? Maybe reads Homestuck?</strong></li>
<li>What does Homestuck have to do with this Abe</li>
<li><strong>Just being observant</strong></li>
<li>I got an observation</li>
<li>SPOOKY TECHNO GHOST THING TOOK THE DIAMOND!!!!</li>
<li>SO WHY ARE WE TAKING NOTES?!</li>
<li><strong>EVIDENCE!</strong></li>
</ul><p> </p><p>He took a few pictures of the notes with his phone, then opened up a new page. Just in case if there was anything about this “techno ghost” that is more than just… a “techno ghost”. Abe mostly just rewrote his notes on the search bar.</p><p>Most of the results seemed to pertain to creepypastas or other cryptids. Most of them don’t seem to look very convincing. Abe sighed through his nose, and typed once more without a huge train of thought put behind it. “Ominous suited gray person thing with red and blue lights around it and can mess with cameras very very quickly”.</p><p>… There was a result on Reddit.</p><p> </p><p>“Posted on June 19th, 2012, by Harold B. Darrensworth”</p><p>“<b><em>UNLAWFUL GRAY THING IN </em> </b> <b> <em>ANY</em> </b> <b> <em> AREA! </em> </b>”</p><p> </p><p>Yep. Seems convincing enough.</p><p>Abe held in a snicker by reading the link, and clicked on it with no real thought. What followed was a full-on rant post with a lot of links to Wikipedia articles, and a single YouTube video. The thumbnail of the video was all black and white, with a young-looking man, around his early twenties, leaning back on a chair on the left. On the other side, a dark but relatively noticeable figure was just standing.</p><p>Abe didn’t feel the need to play the video. He knew that a video with that kind of imagery would just stay like it until it ends. He went back up to click on one of the Wiki articles.</p><p>One of them was about different parts of the eyeball, for some unknown reason. No. Not what he was looking for.</p><p>Another, though, seemed a bit more promising.</p><p>It’s always the pictures in Wikipedia articles that grab Abe’s attention, for he’d get the facial features from perpetrators, burglars, or killers straight away. Another cool thing about being a detective. You learn to pay attention to those sorts of things.</p><p>There was a picture, fortunately, but it was relatively small and blurry, mostly around the face. Abe squinted at the picture as hard as he could until his eyebrows would get tired. And then he remembered that he could just zoom into the webpage. Technology, man. It’s amazing.</p><p>Abe clicked on the picture, and it <em> has </em> gotten bigger and easier to see, but the face was, unfortunately, still blurred.</p><p><em> Dammit, </em>Abe silently cursed, rubbing a hand over his eyes. He went back to the article, and scrolled down to read the usual stats.</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>Born:</em> </b> <em> Unknown</em>”</p><p>“<b><em>Gender: </em> </b> <em> Unknown</em>”</p><p>“<b><em>Occupation:</em></b> <em>Cryptid </em>”</p><p>“<b><em>Years active:</em> </b> <em> June 19, 2012-present </em>”</p><p> </p><p>It’s been about a month since then. Abe scrolled down to try to find more.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Ever since this cryptid’s debut on YouTube user Markiplier’s channel, this creature that Mark’s fans have dubbed as ‘Darkiplier’ has been spotted in various different areas, mostly in Cincinnati, Ohio. Now, Darkiplier’s whereabouts are unknown. People who have claimed to have seen the cryptid described that the creature has gray skin, black hair and eyes, sometimes wears a dark gray suit and sometimes a plain black shirt. Darkiplier also has been described to have red and blue auras, and high pitched ringing illuminating from them depending on temper. Few people who have spotted Darkiplier simply say ‘Do not approach’, but there haven’t been any harmful actions coming from them yet. Their age is unknown. Their gender is unknown, for some people have spotted Darkiplier appearing different in bodily features, facial features, and vocal performance. See other related articles about the twins </em> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q14pVTr1SxQ"> <b> <em>here</em></b><em>.</em></a>”</p><p> </p><p>Abe’s brows narrowed at that last part. Twins? What twins? What do twins have to do with this thing? What’s more important now is trying to find this ‘Darkiplier’ and see where they have the diamond!</p><p>Abe ignored it, and kept reading.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Darkiplier’s personality traits are unknown, but one has claimed to have been ‘spending a few minutes’ with the cryptid, only to find that they are ‘as quiet as they are vengeful. I can see it in their eyes that whoever messed with them wasn’t playing around.’ YouTuber Markiplier has claimed his dark counterpart is only a creation from his fanbase, for he had no idea that this simple character from a simple video would make such a phenomenon. Whether or not he is lying, or is simply being ignorant, is a common topic of discussion in some circles. If you choose to observe and document this cryptid, do so with caution.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Abe leaned back in his chair, copying everything in the article into his notebook, even if he had to scribble away the bits he’s spelled wrong because it was a marker and he can’t erase. This was… admittedly interesting.</p><p>There was a small knock on Abe’s door frame. “Knock knock~!”</p><p>Wilford was coming into the room with two mugs of coffee (one with a straw, because of course). Abe sniffed one of the coffees that was rightfully his, and he took it from Wilford as he came over to the desk. “Thanks, bud.”</p><p>“No prob, Bob,” Wilford replied, smiling. He carefully set his mug next to Abe’s, and grabbed a moderately tall enough stool for him to sit on and to be able to rest his elbows on the desk. “Find anything yet?”</p><p>“Yeah, actually,” Abe said. “Not a whole lot, but enough to know who they are and what they look like.”</p><p>Wilford leaned over to Abe’s computer, peeking at the article.</p><p>“‘Markiplier’,” he read a certain part out loud, slowly. He put a finger around the curling end of his mustache. “Why does that name sound so familiar?”</p><p>“Somebody you used to know, probably,” Abe replied, blowing at his coffee to cool it.</p><p>“Yeah… yeah, I guess so…” Wilford was frowning, looking uncharacteristically thoughtful. Something seemed to be bothering him, but he didn’t really know what. “So what have you found?”</p><p>Abe showed him his notes, and Will’s mouth made a little ‘o’ shape.</p><p>“Is there a better picture of the techno ghost?”</p><p>“Their name is Darkiplier,” Abe muttered.</p><p>Wilford snickered harshly through his nose. He covered his wide smile with his hands, trying to hold in a fit of giggles. Abe turned to him.</p><p>“What is your problem?” he asked, genuinely confused. “We’re trying to find where Darkiplier is, and you’re laughing?”</p><p>Wilford waved a hand, wheezing. “No no no, it’s the name…! First Markiplier, then <em> Dark </em> iplier?! What kind of creativity is put in <em> that? </em>Is it just to show which one is the good twin and the bad twin?”</p><p>“Well, the article <em> did </em>mention twins,” Abe admitted.</p><p>“It’s like, how can I keep the brand, but still be as edgy as possible?” Wilford crossed his eyes, stuck his tongue out, and put his pointer fingers against his temples. “Hmmmmnnnnnn… <b> <em>dArKiPlIeR!!! </em> </b>”</p><p>He began slapping his leg while hugging his stomach, laughing loudly. Abe cracked a smile.</p><p>“I mean… it <em> is </em> kinda funny,” he said.</p><p>Wilford wiped a tear. “I mean, what’s <em> my </em> evil name?”</p><p>“Wingleheimer.”</p><p>“That doesn’t count.”</p><p>After a small moment of silence, Wilford wheezed again. “Can we try to find this edgelord and get it over with, please?! I feel like they’re killing me without even knowing it with that name!”</p><p>“It’s still going to take me a bit to find out where they are. And,” Abe added, “we’re still not one hundred percent sure if this ‘Darkiplier’ even <em> took </em>the diamond. Or if they even exist!”</p><p>“I mean,” Wilford leaned forward. “We <em> saw them </em> in the footage, right? Same look, same fancy suit, same weird powers. What’s the problem?”</p><p>Abe pursed his lips, fiddling with his marker. “I guess the whole thing I read about them doesn’t feel, y’know… <em> real? </em> They’re a cryptid, sure, but how do we know that this thing is legit?”</p><p>Will gave him a look. <em> Just because someone’s got some funny powers doesn’t mean they don’t exist, Abe, you know that. I mean, look at me! </em></p><p>He gestured between the two of them.<em> Look at </em> <b> <em>us!</em> </b> <em> We’re weird, but that’s normal! Maybe it all depends on how you use it that makes you question what part’s real and what isn’t. I’ve gotten past that point a LONG time ago, friend. </em></p><p>Abe looked down at his desk.</p><p><em> Yeah, I guess you’ve got a point. Something about this just seems… </em>He dropped his marker. “...funny.”</p><p>He looked back over at Wilford, seeing a gentle look in his eyes, very similar to one Abe has seen from him before. Will pat his shoulder for a moment- there was something very tender in the motion- then let his hand drop again. “I’m sure you’ve been through worse case scenarios, Abe. But I think we’ll figure it out. We always do.”</p><p>Patting Abe’s shoulder again and excusing himself quietly, Wilford left the room. “Let me know if you find anything!”</p><p>“Will do,” Abe replied, taking a sip of his coffee as he heard Wilford shut the door.</p><p>Abe rested his chin on his hands, staring back at the article. He lingered on at every bit of descriptions of Darkiplier’s appearance.</p><p><em> All I need is their whereabouts, </em> he thought to himself. <em> We already know that they were in the museum just a few nights ago… </em></p><p>Abe sighed, rubbing his forehead. <em> Let’s just get this over with. </em></p><p>His mouse hovered over the link in the part of the paragraph… and went up to the ‘back arrow’ to bring him back to the Reddit post.</p><p><em> The video link is just gonna be a Rick Astley thing or whatever. </em>He brushed it aside, ignoring it once again.</p><p>How much time he could have saved if he’d just clicked it.</p><p>Abe scrolled down the post, seeing something new added at the very bottom.</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>UPDATE:</em> </b> <em> The creature has been spotted near the Dallas, Texas museum, where the Fischbach Diamond has recently gone missing! It has left small trails of patchy gray things all over bushes and buildings, leading to the middle of nowhere. I’d say it’s a pretty useless walk, there’s literally nothing in that field. Whoever is able to tolerate walking for a while, comment below if you find the creature so we can put it into custody! Maybe in AREA 51!!! - Harold B. Darrensworth</em>”</p><p> </p><p>A picture was attached to emphasize his point. A wide open green field of nothing, but a small dot in the far distance.</p><p>Abe decided it wouldn’t hurt to ask a few questions.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>How long have you been investigating this ‘cryptid’? - A. L</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Abe got a response almost immediately.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Since June! They just seemed to appear out of nowhere- what exactly do you want to know? - Harold B. Darrensworth</em>”</p><p>“<em>A friend of mine and I have been looking into the missing Fischbach Diamond since earlier this morning. We found some footage about the same creature you’ve been talking about. Suit, hair, complexion- everything seems to match perfectly. Are you able to bring us to the location of the field? - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Are you sure??? This thing is supposed to be very strange, I’m pretty sure it has the tendency to kill. - Harold</em>”</p><p>“<em>My friend and I are tough nuts. We can take whatever- it’s literally our job to track this diamond, we’re detectives. The trail must lead to them. -A. L</em>”</p><p> </p><p>After a minute or two, Harold responded.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Okay, if you’re so sure. If it’s your job, then I guess I won’t stop you. Email me your address so I can take you tomorrow. - Harold</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“Huh,” Abe said, smirking. “That was easy.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Just checking- you don’t belong to any cults, do you? - Harold</em>”</p><p>“<em>Uhh… no. - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Cool. - Harold</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Okay, that was strange.</p><p>Abe got up from his seat and shut his computer off. He closed his notebook and carried his mug up from the desk. As he left his office, he called out, “Wilford, guess what!”</p><p>Wilford was heard from the bathroom, likely touching up on his mustache or taking a bubble bath. “What?”</p><p>“We got a location!”</p><p>Wilford is heard cheering.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Lists are Not Very Helpful in These Situations</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harold B. Darrensworth, true to his word, did show up the next morning. Wilford and Abe were waiting outside the apartment building until they spotted his car pull up near them. They all greeted each other, and got in the man’s car. Wilford had an entire checklist of things for him and Abe to have during their investigation- including snacks because why not. He’d brought some for Harold, too, because he claimed it was “Good guest etiquette”.</p><p> </p><ul>
<li>SNACKS!!!</li>
<li>Guns</li>
<li>Magnifying glass</li>
<li>(nobody uses a magnifying glass anymore)</li>
<li>MORE snacks</li>
<li>Notebooks</li>
<li>Pencils</li>
<li>Bags for probable (?) pebbles that look like diamonds</li>
<li>Bags for improbable diamonds that look like pebbles</li>
<li>Indiana Jones’ katana knife thing to cut away a bunch of brambles cuz the field leads from the woods for some dumb reason</li>
<li>Even more snacks</li>
<li>NOT the CD player cuz I don’t wanna lose it!!!!</li>
<li>Stilts if we ever lose a leg</li>
<li>Humming abilities close enough to sound like an actual song if we need music</li>
<li>Cookies which I guess count as snacks</li>
<li>Friendship</li>
</ul><p> </p><p>He was still scribbling away as Abe looked over his shoulder. “You know, Wilford, you’ve gotta take this seriously if you want to find Darkiplier.”</p><p>“I know!” Wilford exclaimed, one leg over the other in his seat. “I just wanna get prepared!”</p><p>“You can <em> never </em> be too prepared,” Harold chirped from the driver’s seat… with his <em> HORRIFYING </em> lisp. “Once I got to this place yesterday, I saw a bunch of prints in the grass that looked like lions! Or bears, I don’t remember, but they were <em> big! </em>You two need more than snacks!”</p><p>“We’ve got weapons, I think we’ll be okay,” Abe replied, patting his vest pocket that held his pistol. “Wilford, you got your magnum?”</p><p>Wilford was fiddling with the cylinder. “Yep!”</p><p>Harold glanced up at Wilford through the rear view mirror. “You know, something about you is very familiar. I swear I’ve seen you on the news, or on papers. I remember my grandfather being very upset about this ‘mustached man in pink just slept with his wife’ or something like that.”</p><p>“That’s weirdly specific, and I’m sure it was a <em> complete </em>misunderstanding!” Wilford waved a hand, the same hand with his gun.</p><p>“Wilford, <em> please </em> be careful with that thing,” Abe gritted his teeth, covering his face. His friend waved it again teasingly, and Abe gingerly took it from him. This made Wilford pout.</p><p>“How long until we get to the field?”</p><p>“Not too long now,” Harold replied, keeping his eyes on the road (even though surely he probably wanted to keep studying Wilford- he was as strange as anything else he’d been studying). “I’m trying to find all those gray spots that the cryptid left.”</p><p>“Maybe they fade?” Wilford asked. “Did you take any pictures of them?”</p><p>“I did, but I forgot to add them on my post,” Harold said, moving his head around in certain angles. “I remember where they are, though. We’re going the right way.”</p><p>Wilford yawned toothily in the backseat. “You’d think if you knew the way, we’d be quicker.”</p><p>“Hey, do <em> you </em> wanna drive?” Harold frowned, glaring back up at the mirror.</p><p>Wilford’s arms crossed. “I would absolutely <em> love </em> to.”</p><p>“Hey, we’re getting closer to the woods place that leads to the field, yaaaaayyyyyyy!” Abe slammed a hand on the dashboard, forcing a grin. Both men stared at him. Harold noticed a sign above a stone-made wall in front of trees. The sign reads “Daniel Cecily’s Woods”.</p><p>“Oh, hey, we <em> are,</em>” Harold said, voice immediately shifting to normal. “Cool.”</p><p>“Lovely,” Wilford mumbled, putting his elbow against the window to rest his chin on his hand. The car stopped and pulled over near the wall.</p><p>“Thank you for driving us,” Wilford said.</p><p>“No problem. Let me know if you get anything new, yeah?” Harold asked.</p><p>“I think you need to be a detective to get more professional evidence of everything that’s going on,” Abe said, unbuckling his seat belt. “But I think as long as you don’t share any of the info we give you, it’ll be fine.”</p><p>Harold made a face, but nodded. Abe took his hand out, and he shook Harold’s. As Will and Abe got out of the car, Will tapped on Harold’s window for him to put it down. Abe turned over, not able to hear what Wilford was saying… but it wasn’t good.</p><p>“You <em> WHAT?! </em>”</p><p>Wilford stood back as Harold started the car up. “Abe, run for it!!”</p><p>Unintelligible screaming was coming from Harold through the car (quite uncharacteristic of him, huh?), and Wilford and Abe took a sharp turn towards the forest.</p><p>“What the <em> hell </em> did you <em> say </em> to him?!” Abe asked loudly.</p><p>“I said, word for word,” Wilford panted, “‘I <em> did </em> in fact sleep with your grandmother, and I apologize for that!’ Can’t people take a simple apology anymore?!”</p><p>Abe almost choked on his own spit.</p><p>“I said I was sorry!” Wilford shouted, and Abe slapped a hand on his chest. “Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop…!”</p><p>The two stopped running, listening for… something.</p><p>“He’s not coming after us,” Abe sighed. “Not <em> me, </em> anyway.”</p><p>Wilford blinked, stammering. “I SAID I WAS SORRY!!”</p><p>Abe looked out through the woods, searching for some kind of path. “When we get home, you are sending him a <em> very </em> nice email.”</p><p>“That seems fair,” Wilford muttered, rubbing his arm.</p><p>The woods were really, really cold. All of the trees were abnormally dead with no leaves, unlike the ones just out of the area. Everything was very gray looking, too, and the only source of color were the leaves on the ground, and Wilford. It was like he was a neon beacon against the monochrome.</p><p>“Just add fog and make it nighttime, and it’s officially more creepy,” Abe said, keeping himself close near Wilford. Adorable.</p><p>Wilford kicked a leaf pile. “I’m just waiting for a witch to pop up. Or a skeleton. A skeleton witch.”</p><p>“That’s definitely something to look forward to in the middle of the woods,” Abe replied, of course sarcastically, but Wilford didn’t notice the tone. He was already walking off, with Wilford keeping up while trying to look at everything.</p><p>“‘S kinda spooky out here…” Wilford started hugging himself. “Chilly.”</p><p>“Yeah, I noticed,” Abe replied, looking up at the naked branches. “It doesn’t get cold here very often.”</p><p>He heard Wilford’s pace quicken. “There’s <em> one </em> sign that we might be getting close to Darkiplier, though, right?”</p><p>“Probably.”</p><p>Hopefully.</p><p>They trudged on, with Wilford eventually - and very enthusiastically - finding a trail. (“I found a trail!!!” - “Good job, bud!”)</p><p>What the two detectives didn’t find, was the sound of low growling coming from a certain animal that is… five times its normal size, with its paws making imprints on the leaves from not-so-far behind.</p><p>How they didn’t see it is somewhat baffling, and how they didn’t hear it, is even more so.</p><p>It’s probably a crime not to hear or see this… thing. And whatever this thing is, she is <em> not </em> keen to strangers invading her and her master’s home.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Wilford Tries Not to Barf</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I spy with my little eye- <em> not </em> a tree.”</p><p>“Leaf.”</p><p>“Oh! You got it right on the first try! Okay- I spy with my little eye… <em> not </em> a leaf.”</p><p>“Tree.”</p><p>“How are you getting so good at this?! I spy with my little eye, definitely not a tree.”</p><p>“Leaf.”</p><p>“Goddammit! I spy with my little eye, 100 percent, absolutely positively, definitely not a leaf-”</p><p>“Wilford, you’ve been running out of things to ‘spy’ on for the past two hours,” Abe said gruffly, resting an arm near a tree.</p><p>Wilford sighed, his mustache drooping. “I know… the only thing in this forest are trees and leaves… and gray…”</p><p>“Well, you’re still here,” Abe replied, shaking a leg. “So you and your colors stand out a ton to make this forest more interesting.”</p><p>“Any pop of color would be a rainbow compared to this place.”</p><p>“Do you think they got a big bucket of gray paint and just threw it on the trees, or something?”</p><p>“Well, that <em> does </em> sound like fun, if not environmentally conscious,” Wilford admitted. Abe gave Wilford a look. “Since when were <em> you </em> conscious over anything?”</p><p>Loud barking was suddenly heard in the distance. They both turned around but didn’t see anything.</p><p>“That was what?” Wilford asked… strangely?</p><p>“I think you mean, ‘What was that’?”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Wilford seemed really distracted, constantly glancing over his shoulder. His eyes were a little glazed. </p><p>Frowning, Abe clicked his fingers in front of Wilford’s eyes. “Ah-! What?”</p><p>“You okay there, buddy?” It was audible that Abe tried to sound gentle.</p><p>His friend glanced at him, and Wilford looked confused. “I… think? So?”</p><p>“I think the woods are getting to you,” Abe said, putting a hand on Wilford’s shoulder. “We’re going the right way, at least. I think we’re almost out of here and then we’ll be in the field. Got any of that?”</p><p>Wilford was hugging himself again. “Maybe?”</p><p>Abe took Wilford’s arm, gently tugging. “Just follow me, okay?”</p><p>Wilford just nodded, eyes darting from Abe down to his feet multiple times. The detective frowned, taking both of his hands and gently shaking them. “Hey, look at me- <em> Wilford. </em> Just calm down and look at me for a sec, okay?”</p><p>The other man looked like he didn’t notice it, but his arms were trembling. Abe quietly gave him credit that he tried to look at him, though. “Come on, bud. We’re almost outta here. I won’t let anything bad happen, we just gotta keep going.”</p><p>“I- I’m sorry-”</p><p>There was a little sniffle, and Wilford tried to wipe at his eyes. “I don’t know how- why-? I feel so bad-”</p><p>“That’s okay, though,” Abe said. “Bud, look at me.”</p><p>Holding his breath, Wilford actually looked. “Y- yeah?”</p><p>Abe tried to smile. “We’re here, we’re in the moment, the woods is just getting to you a whole lot, or it’s something completely different that I don’t know about, but, hey,” his grip around Wilford’s hands tightened. “We’re here. We’re almost done with these woods, we just have to truck through this trail, okay? I know there’s not a lot of color, there’s no people, there might be a spooky dog around here somewhere-”</p><p>He swung Wilford’s hands a little bit. “But we’re here. <em> You’re </em> here, <em> I’m </em> here, we’re both okay.”</p><p>There was a little moan, and Wilford closed his eyes for a moment.</p><p>“Come on. I’m gonna get us out of here.”</p><p>“I believe you,” Wilford’s voice was more wobbly than usual. Abe is trying to remember the last time he’s seen him like this, if at all. “I… don’t think I like this place anymore.”</p><p>Abe looked down, and saw that Wilford’s legs were both stiff and shaking at the same time. Can’t run to quicken the pace.</p><p>“... Want me to carry you?”</p><p>Wilford blinked, trying to appear at least a little bit silly. “Nnnnnnnnno…”</p><p>Abe sighed, “Well, if you want out of these woods, there’s literally no other option.”</p><p>“I know,” Wilford croaked. “I just don’t want you to sprain anything. You tried carrying me before and it didn’t go so well-”</p><p>“I don’t want you to fall over or something. It’ll be fine.” </p><p>Abe almost lost his cool in his voice, and Wilford noticed, sighing through his nose and looking down. “My arm over your shoulder, then.”</p><p>Good enough. “Okay.”</p><p>Abe slowly put Wilford’s arm over his head to his shoulder, nudging his leg near his knee. “Still able to walk?”</p><p>“I think so, yes,” Wilford replied quietly, as Abe put his foot against his.</p><p>“Step when I step, alright?” he asked. Wilford just nodded.</p><p>After a few fumbled attempts, they began to hobble out at a slow pace. At some points it became too much for Wilford, who would groan and rest his head against the detective’s shoulder. They’d stop for a few minutes before Will regained his composure, and they’d set out again.</p><p>The further out they walked, the less gray there seemed to be.</p><p>“See, buddy?” Abe asked. “We’re almost there!”</p><p>“Mmhmm…”</p><p>Low growling was heard, making Abe and Wilford stop in their tracks.</p><p>“‘S that a dog?” Wilford whispered.</p><p>“I don’t know,” Ab said. “Let’s keep walking.”</p><p>As soon as the two took another step, the growling grew louder. Wilford whimpered. “Can we hurry, please…?”</p><p>Abe slowly took another step, and there was a deep echoing bark through the trees. Wilford flinched at the sound, and jumped up in Abe’s arms, almost too quickly. The detective was so surprised that he nearly dropped him. He could sense the panic.</p><p>Another bark was louder than before, and Wilford’s grip almost choked Abe.</p><p>“Aghk- okay- alright-”</p><p>“Sorry-”</p><p>Another bark, and Abe gritted his teeth and ran. Wilford looked over Abe’s shoulder to see a big gray figure running towards them, and it did <em> not </em> look happy. “Keep running…!!!”</p><p>“I <em> AM </em> RUNNING!” Abe shouted. “You’re all over me like a damsel in distress, <em> DO </em> SOMETHING!”</p><p>“DO YOU WANT ME TO THROW UP ON YOU?!? BECAUSE THAT’S ABOUT IT FOR MY MOTOR FUNCTIONS RIGHT NOW!!!”</p><p>“DO YOU HAVE YOUR GUN ON YOU?!”</p><p>“YEAH, BUT IT’S UNLOADED AS FAR AS I CAN TELL!”</p><p>“GET MY GUN FROM MY VEST, AND JUST SHOOT IT!”</p><p>An even louder bark.</p><p>“I’M NOT GONNA SHOOT A DOG, ABE!!!”</p><p>“THAT THING IS <em> NOT </em> A DOG, <em> JUST DO IT! </em>”</p><p>“<em>OKAY! </em>”</p><p>Wilford reached a hand down at Abe’s vest pocket, and fiddled with the handle of his pistol. He aimed behind him and heard a click, cursed, then turned off the safety. <em> Please let me miss, please let me miss, please let me miss- </em></p><p>Wilford saw the dog catching up with them, with it snarling with its tongue out all over. He shut his eyes as he aimed and pulled the trigger. He cracked an eye open, seeing that the huge gray dog was unharmed. “<em>WHAT?! </em>”</p><p>“WHAT??” Abe asked, oblivious over what has just happened behind him. He doesn’t have eyes on the back of his head, what is he gonna do?</p><p>“I SHOT IT AND IT’S OKAY!”</p><p>The detective swore. “DO IT AGAIN!”</p><p>Another gunshot. “NOTHING!”</p><p>“AGAIN, WE’RE ALMOST OUT!”</p><p>Another gunshot. “<em>DAMMIT! </em>”</p><p>One of Abe’s feet stumbled in front of the other in a silly way, causing him to trip over and drop Wilford. Abe cursed again, feeling a strain around his ankle. He looks behind him, and sees the dog catching up, much quicker. Abe looks forward, seeing no trees, only a wide open field, and Wilford is struggling to get up.</p><p>“Wilford!” Ignoring the pain in his foot, Abe struggles to get up, and he grabs Wilford by the hand to make him stand up on his feet. “We gotta go!”</p><p>“I figured it as such!” Wilford exclaimed, all of the sudden sounding more lively than he did a while ago. He didn’t sound as tired or sickly as he did in the forest… but none of that is important right now, because there is a ten foot gray dog chasing after them. It looks <em> pissed </em>now.</p><p>Abe’s grip on Wilford’s hand tightened as they both took a run for it, both of their eyes shut tight.</p><p>All of the panic Abe and Wilford had suddenly felt like a big smack in the face, and it felt very hard and prickly, like wood. “<em>O</em><em>W</em><em>! </em>”</p><p>Abe stumbled back, a hand clamped over his now bleeding nose. His eyes opened, seeing Wilford rubbing a visible bruise on his head.</p><p>There was heavy panting behind them, and a quiet sigh. Abe and Wilford slowly turned over, seeing the dog plopped on the ground with its eyes closed, breathing heavily.</p><p>“Yeah, hope you get a good night’s rest too,” Wilford scowled. Abe took a step on a small set of wooden stairs, and stumbled over on his behind. Wilford could see that he was clearly out of breath. “Abe? You alright?”</p><p>“Definitely,” Abe sighed, patting on an open spot on the stairs next to him. “I am so glad we’re out of those fuckin’ woods. Sit here, bud.”</p><p>“Okay do-kay,” Wilford slowly knelt down and flopped on the step next to Abe. They both sighed. “Look at us, Abe. We did it!”</p><p>“Hell yeah we did,” Abe smiled.</p><p>There was a very swift breeze that Wilford breathed in. “I forget what I was even upset about.”</p><p>The two stared at the dog, who was sleeping peacefully. One of it’s paws twitched in the air a little bit. Abe looked over his shoulder, seeing a whole cabin right behind him and Wilford. He could smile wider that he found more evidence, but it takes a lot of energy at the moment.</p><p>“I dare you to pet the dog,” Wilford nudged Abe’s elbow.</p><p>“What? No, you do it.” Abe scooted up a step to get away from the dog.</p><p>“<em>I </em> shot it, I don’t want to touch it.”</p><p>“I made you shoot it in the first place, I’m not gonna touch it either.”</p><p>“Pet the dog, and then we’ll go in the cabin to get the diamond back.”</p><p>“I am <em> not </em> gonna do that.”</p><p>“But the diamond is so <em> important </em> to you!” Wilford was shaking Abe by the shoulders. “You don’t wanna pet the dog so you can get the diamond?”</p><p>Abe put his hands up. “Alright, fine! I’ll touch the friggin’ dog.”</p><p>Wilford bit his bottom lip, trying to hide his chuckles. Abe stood up, slowly descending from the stairs, getting himself closer to the dog. He held his breath as he reached a hand out, gently resting it on its muzzle. Wilford saw that Abe’s eyes were shut tightly, gritting his teeth. One of Abe’s eyes opened slowly, looking over only to see that the dog was still asleep. “Oh- Oh, it’s out cold.”</p><p>“<b>She.</b>”</p><p>Oh?!</p><p>“<b>My dog is a </b> <b> <em>she</em></b><em><b>.</b></em>”</p><p>Abe turned his head over his shoulder, and Wilford just looked up from where he was sitting.</p><p>This is a face reveal that somebody like Harold and the writers behind the Wikipedia article could love. “<b>You’re not welcome here.</b>”</p><p>“<em>o</em><em>h</em><em>…</em>” Abe and Wilford breathed.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. They’re All Here</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<b><em>Well? </em> </b> ” The being growled. “<b>You two are supposed to leave, </b> <b> <em>right now. GET UP.</em></b>”</p><p>Wilford put his hands up, feeling a small kick in the back. “Okay okay, mind your manners…!”</p><p>“<b>Think about that the next time you enter private property.</b>”</p><p>Sure, as if Wilford is destined to remember that. He squeaked a small “okay” anyway.</p><p>Hands shaking, Abe pulled out his credentials. “Uh- I- We’re here because of the- uh, missing Fischbach Diamond case…”</p><p>“<b>... I see,</b> ” they (he?) said coldly. “ <b>I know nothing of which you speak of. Now, if you two could </b> <b> <em>please</em> </b> <b> leave-</b>”</p><p>“It’ll only be for a moment, please?”</p><p>“<b>No.</b>”</p><p>Wilford put his hands on his hips. “Why not??”</p><p>“Sir-” Abe got cut off by the slam of the door.</p><p>The dog snorted, opening her eyes. The door opened slowly. “<b>Charlotte, come.</b>”</p><p>She sat up, yawning. Abe backed up in sheer panic of the dog’s size. “<b>Please.</b>”</p><p>The dog’s tail thumped on the ground, and Wilford jumped off of the staircase to let her through. She somehow fit through the door, and it shut quietly behind her with a click.</p><p>Abe and Wilford stared at the cabin, and back at each other.</p><p>“Angry guy, huh?”</p><p>“Yeah.” Abe frowned deeply. “What… what do you want to do?”</p><p>“Go in,” Wilford replied, with a hint of temper. “I wanna give that guy a piece of my mind!”</p><p>Abe knelt down and sat on the ground with his legs crossed. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. He looks kind of mad right now.”</p><p>“I’m pretty sure we’d already know that from the get-go,” Wilford said. “How are we gonna get the diamond now?”</p><p>Abe picked on pieces of grass. “I don’t know. I figured you’d think of what to do.”</p><p>A frown. “Why me?”</p><p>“Because you’re more determined and confident about the crazy shit you do,” Abe said, brows furrowed.</p><p>“Yeah, but I’m not too crazy about getting mauled right now.” Wilford sat down next to Abe, hugging his knees. The two of them sighed. How on earth were they going to get in?</p><p>Wilford, bless him, made up his mind just to knock on the door. The dog raced to the door first, as any other dog would do, just to bark at Wilford. A face was seen next to her. “<b>I thought I told you to go away.</b>”</p><p>“You did!” Wilford replied, grinning. Abe looked over his shoulder to watch. “I just thought it would be alright to say… I’m a detective.”</p><p>A very audible snort. “<b>No you’re not.</b>”</p><p>“Yes I am,” Wilford insisted.</p><p>“<b>Show me your credentials then,</b>” the being said.</p><p>“Don’t want to.”</p><p>An audible smack-in-the-face came from Abe. Wilford turned to him, shrugging, like, “Come on, give me some slack.” There was a heavy sigh from behind the doorway, and while the two outside couldn’t hear what he was saying, it was probably very rude.</p><p>“Come on, please?” Wilford asked, putting his hands together. “My friend and I will just come in, my friend will ask you a few questions because he’s better than me, and we’ll be out of your hair!”</p><p>He could see half of the being’s face with his hair covering the other from behind the door’s window, staring at him very intensely. His visible eye is heavily narrowed, to the point it looks like it's almost closed. Will had to bite his lip to keep from smiling. The being looked like he was in deep contemplation, and he sighed deeply. A click from the inside could be heard, and he ushered the dog away. “<b>Both of you, come in.</b>”</p><p>The two of them exchanged a look. </p><p>“<b><em>Before</em> </b> <b> I change my mind. Don’t drip blood on the floorboards.</b>”</p><p>Smiling widely, Wilford rushed down the steps to grab Abe from the vest, and they both raced inside the cabin.</p><p>It could have been a cozy thing, if it wasn’t so waterlogged. Buckets were all around the floor, full of water, dog hair, bugs, and small chips of wood. The dog, Charlotte, was curled up in a big red doggy bed in the corner near a fireplace surrounded by cobwebs. The cabin was freezing cold… which is strange, because it was so warm outside. In different circumstances, this cabin might have been a charming place.</p><p>There was a small table in front of a window from the other side of the door. The being patted on the table, gesturing Abe and Wilford to sit down with him. “<b>If I remember correctly, you two are here for a missing diamond?</b>”</p><p>“Yep!” Wilford chirped. The being glanced at him for a moment, with Abe still looking around the cabin while sitting down. The dog sneezed in the corner, making Abe jump. The being looked like he wanted to smirk.</p><p>“<b>Well, I am afraid I cannot help you.</b>”</p><p>“What if you can, though?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>What if I don’t want to?</b>”</p><p>Wilford smirked. “What if we turn you in if you don’t want to help?”</p><p>“<b>Do you really think you could get anyone willing to walk into that forest just to get me put in jail?</b>”</p><p>“<em>We </em> walked in it!” Wilford gestured to himself and Abe. “It sucked, but we did it!”</p><p>The being looked over at the dog. “<b>Charlotte doesn’t like visitors.</b>”</p><p>“<em>Exactly! </em>” Wilford snapped a finger.</p><p>“Do you have a name, sir?” Abe asked. “Just to make sure.”</p><p>The being’s knuckles fidgeted together. “<b>My name is Dark.</b>”</p><p>“Edgelord…” Wilford muttered in Abe’s ear.</p><p>“<b>Don’t think I didn’t hear that.</b>” Dark’s fist clenched on the table, but his expression softened. “<b>Do you mind if </b> <b> <em>I</em> </b> <b> ask for your name?</b>”</p><p>“Abe Lincoln,” Abe said. “Not related to the 16th president.”</p><p>“<b>I can see that,</b>” Dark replied, eyes still narrowed. He looked over at Wilford. “<b>And you… what is your name?</b>”</p><p>“Wilford Warfstache,” Wilford answered. Dark stared at him, the corner of his mouth twitching.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Same mustache and everything…</em> </b>
</p><p><em> What? </em> Wilford blinked.</p><p>Dark’s eyes glanced over to Charlotte, who got up and walked to the door, scratching the bottom of it. He got up from his seat. “<b>Detective, may I talk with you outside?</b>”</p><p>“Which one?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>The one who is not you,</b>” Dark replied. Abe stood up, ruffling Wilford’s hair as he passed by him.</p><p>“You can just look around and find some clues while we’re out,” Abe said. “We’ll only be for a few minutes.”</p><p>Wilford fixed his hair while resting his chin on his other hand. “Okay…”</p><p>The two (three, including Charlotte) exited the cabin, Dark carefully shutting the door behind him. He ushered Abe to walk off the staircase. He puts a hand on his shoulder as they both found themselves in the field. “<b>I know who you are, Abraham. And I know why you’re here.</b>”</p><p>The detective frowned. “O… kay…”</p><p>He sighed, adjusting his tie. “<b>And I know you do not remember me.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah, I- I can tell…”</p><p>“<b>And I know </b> <b> <em>William,</em> </b> <b> too.</b>” Dark added, looking back at the cabin. Abe felt his stomach lurch, but he didn’t know why. “<b>I know him more than anybody else. But I know that he doesn’t remember me either.</b>”</p><p>Abe’s brows furrowed. “What’s this all about, Darkiplier?”</p><p>Dark looked back at Abe, frowning deeply. “<b>Just tell me everything you know about Will. I haven’t really… caught up with him in a while.</b>”</p><p>“He’s… different. It’s all different now,” Abe said. “How do you know Willia-”</p><p>“<b>Let’s- </b> <b> <em>not </em> </b> <b>get into that right now.</b>” Dark looked distinctly uncomfortable. “<b>Tell me about him.</b>”</p><p>“Why don’t you go back in and find out for yourself if you’re so curious?” Abe asked.</p><p>“<b>I’d rather not.</b>”</p><p>Crickets, if only for a moment. Charlotte plopped down on the ground and rested her head on her paws, looking at Dark lovingly. “<b>Charlotte is curious as well.</b>”</p><p>Abe glared at the dog, pursing his lips nervously.</p><p>“Oh, well if Charlotte’s asking, sure,” he said sarcastically. “Look, pal, do you <em>honestly </em>think I’m going to gossip about my friend with a creepy stranger in a creepy forest?”</p><p>“<b>That’s a bit rude,</b>” Dark said. “<b>How do you know I’m creepy if you barely know me?</b>”</p><p>“I know <em> enough </em> about you to know that you’re creepy, that you’re strange.” Abe was trying to recollect as much information he’s gotten from Harold and the Wikipedia article as possible.</p><p>The besuited man sneered. “<b>I’d consider that an error in logic, Abraham. You don’t </b> <b> <em>know </em> </b> <b>anything. That’s why you’re here, looking for answers.</b>”</p><p>He said that last part in a tone in his voice like it was the most disgusting thing in the world.</p><p>
  <em> Wow, glad to know I disgust you. </em>
</p><p><b> <em>I never said that. </em> </b> “<b>Tell me about Will. </b> <b> <em>Now.</em></b>”</p><p>“You know, I <em> don’t really want to,</em>” Abe scowled. “How do I know what you’re gonna do with the information that you want me to give you?”</p><p>Dark suddenly snapped. “<b><em>Enough with the stupid questions! </em> </b> <b>Tell me about him </b> <b> <em>RIGHT NOW! </em> </b>”</p><p>“Fucking- <em> NO! </em>” Abe sat back, putting his hands up near his chest.</p><p>Wilford could hear Dark’s tantrum from inside the cabin.</p><p><em> Jeez, </em> he thought. <em> He sure is pissed. </em></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Ooo, a tiny shiny!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>While Abe and Dark looked like they were about to beat each other up outside, Wilford was snooping. He was humming the <em> Mission Impossible </em> theme as he did so, sort of subconsciously. “<em>Dun, dun, dun DUN dun, dun, dun dun dun, dun-</em>”</p><p>Crouching down to poke the floorboards, stuffing his head in the fireplace (what a brave soul too, getting cobwebs all over his hair), even dunking his hand in one of the buckets full of water to search for… something? What was it that Abe wanted to find so bad? A shiny?</p><p>… It was something shiny, he remembered that much. Maybe the woods really <em> did </em> get to him. At least there were buckets if he needed to hurl. Wilford stood up to his feet, stretching his legs out. “Owowowowowowowow- much better.”</p><p>Wilford looked over to a mirror on the wall, with a framed picture hung next to it. It was a picture of the gray Dark guy with the top half of his face covered by the frame, but he is seen smiling, almost mischievously. Two objects were resting on both sides of him. One, a dark tan box with a bright blue jewel on the top center, and the other, a small red gem.</p><p>Wilford smiled at this. <em> Aww, looks like one happy small family. </em></p><p>He turned over his shoulder to check outside the window to see if Abe or Dark was watching. He pulled out a marker, and wrote “<b>BEST FRIENDS</b>” on it, snickering. Useless mission accomplished!</p><p>Gee, this place was cold. <em> Wish I had a match to kill all those cobwebs. </em></p><p>Wilford went back to the fireplace, looking for some kind of tray that would hold matches or a lighter. He got up on his tip-toes to see over a small wooden shelf above the fireplace. There were hooks on the wall, with the faded outline of a shotgun.</p><p>There was nothing on the shelf but a small broken mirror, probably from a car or a motorcycle. … No, a car. Wilford couldn’t really see someone like Dark to be on a motorcycle. The written imprint in the mirror said, “<em>Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear</em>”.</p><p>A tiny red shine came from the reflection of the mirror. Wilford looked over from behind him, seeing a rarely used sink against the wall. The same red shine was coming from a small crack in between the sink and the wall. He crouched down, trying to peer closer. “What…”</p><p>Wilford walked over to the sink, trying to keep the shine in his sight, with the sunlight coming in through the window. It was only a tiny ray, and there were clouds out today. Wilford almost hesitantly put his hands on the sink, because there was dust and dog hair all over it, but then he remembered that he had cobwebs from the fireplace all over his hair, so what’s really the point now?</p><p>His grip around the sink was tightening, as he slowly tried to pull it from the wall. Half an inch in, and the red shiny was gone. Wilford heard a small “clink!” on the floor next to his feet. He grinned as he got down on a knee to pick it up. “Hey there!”</p><p>A small, hard object was now in his hands. He held it up to the light, peering closely. Miniscule bands of light were inside of it, and rainbows were reflecting off of the walls.</p><p>It was <em> really </em>pretty.</p><p><em> What was this thing for again? </em> Wilford shrugged. <em> Oh well. </em></p><p>He went back over to the table to set the tiny jewel down. He took his sweater off, only to forcefully rip the hood and wrap it around the tiny red gem, and as soon as he put his sweater back on, he stuffed the hooded gem in his pocket.</p><p>He wasn’t going to tell Abe about this. Not yet. </p><p>It would be fun to see the look on his face when Abe found out Wilford had figured it out, all by himself. Wilford chuckled at the thought, only to be interrupted by a bunch of screaming. “What the hell..?”</p><p>“<em>I don’t have to tell you anything!! </em>”</p><p>Abe suddenly busted through the door. “Wilford, come on. We’re leaving.”</p><p>“What-?”</p><p>“<b>Your ‘partner’ is being unreasonable,</b>” the Dark gray guy came through the door, with Charlotte behind him, blocking the exit. “<b>You two are staying here until you give me what I asked for.</b>”</p><p>“That’s LITERALLY WHAT <em> WE </em> CAME HERE FOR!” Abe shouted, keeping Wilford behind him. Wilford rolled his eyes. He set himself up on the table near the window, and punched the glass without warning. He grabbed Abe’s hand. “Come on!”</p><p>They jumped out, running around the house off into the field, hand in hand. Dark watched them go, frustrated and perplexed. “<b>... Charlotte, would you be a dear and tail them for me?</b>”</p><p>Charlotte’s tail lifted up from the floorboards, and she ran off the staircase. Dark smiled. “<b>Good girl.</b>”</p><p>He would let them go, for now, but he wasn’t done with them yet… not with Wilford, anyway.</p><p>The detective, though… that was a whole other story.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Run For Yo’ Lives, Boys</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As soon as the two detectives made it to the woods, Wilford stopped, already feeling so sick. He doubled over, clasping his mouth with his unused hand. Abe knelt down to him, trying to sound reassuring but quick at the same time… not a great combo.</p><p>He could see Charlotte in the distance, ‘hiding’ behind some trees that were much too thin for her. Her tail was wagging.</p><p>“Wilford, do you feel like you need to throw up?”</p><p>A soft whimper.</p><p>Abe patted his shoulder, crouching down next to him. “I’m gonna carry you again, okay?”</p><p>No audible response. The detective grunted, standing before scooping him up. “Alright. Upsy-daisy.”</p><p>Wilford was groaning by the throat, keeping his eyes shut tight. The groan was both a mix of “I don’t want you to carry me, I don’t want your spine to break in half like that one time” and “I actually hate being lifted up and not having my body in control, please put me down”. There was really no other choice, otherwise Dark would get the two back in the cabin by now if they just stopped moving. Abe was as slow but simultaneously fast as possible, enough for Wilford to not pass out.</p><p>“Abe-”</p><p>“Hm?”</p><p>“How… how’re we gonna get home? Harold’s not gonna wanna pick us up-”</p><p>Shit, he’d forgotten about that. “Let’s worry about that later, buddy. We just gotta get out of here.”</p><p>“B- but- but I messed up,” Wilford whimpered.</p><p>“I know. But you can fix it later,” Abe assured him. He glanced over his shoulder- Charlotte was following them, yes, but she wasn’t <em> chasing </em>them. He kept on walking.</p><p>Sighing, Wilford hugged his neck before frowning. “... Your nose is bleeding.”</p><p>“Oh. Yeah.” He was a little startled when Wilford reached up, dabbing at the trickle with his sleeve. “Not your fault though, so you don’t have to worry about that, right?”</p><p>Wilford tried to laugh. “At least…!”</p><p>A wave of nausea hit him, and he stopped laughing. “Oooohhhhhoooo, bad idea. Bad ideas all around…”</p><p>Abe hummed in sympathy.</p><p>Was the dog still following them? How could something as big as a garbage truck even attempt to be so quiet?</p><p>Lots of rustling in the trees… but it could just be the wind. Because <em> of course </em> it could really be something that definitely isn’t the wind… or is, Abe wasn’t so sure.</p><p>He looked behind him again. He couldn’t see the dog.</p><p>“I think she’s playing hide n’ seek with you,” Wilford mumbled, smiling weakly.</p><p>“You’re hilarious.”</p><p>Wilford had a thumb up near Abe’s chin. “I know, I try.”</p><p>Even when he’s sick and uncomfortable to the point of vomiting, Wilford is trying to be optimistic and silly. It was kind of sweet. He does mean it when he tries, and honestly, Abe couldn’t be upset about that.</p><p>The detective shook his head, clearing his throat. Wilford let out a wheezing sort of chuckle. “Abe, can I say something, really quick?”</p><p>“I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t,” Abe replied, looking down at him. “What is it?”</p><p>Wilford almost giggled. “I <em> really </em> don’t like these woods anymore. We should get a helicopter and fly over them the next time we go to that dumb cabin.”</p><p>“Do you <em> really </em> wanna shill over all that money?” Abe raised a brow.</p><p>“Absolutely.”</p><p>“Have fun working at McDonald’s, then.”</p><p>“I don’t have to,” Wilford tried to raise his voice. “We can just get one and then, ‘pop’! We’re there whenever we want.”</p><p>“We’re not rich, buddy.”</p><p>Wilford waved a foot, substituting it for a hand. “Ye of little faith, my friend.”</p><p>Abe smiled. “Burn me at the stake for being practical.”</p><p>More rustling, closer than the other few times Abe would assume it’d be the wind. They were almost out now. It’s quicker leaving something than entering it, because once Wilford and Abe first arrived into the woods, it took about two hours to go through it all, even when they were on the right trail. Now that they knew what to expect, it took much less time.</p><p>About halfway through, Wilford began to feel more lively, literally trying to squirm out of Abe’s arms, insisting that he was feeling better. Abe set him down to humor him, only for Wilford to lurch forward and almost fall on his face. “I’m <em> okay! </em>”</p><p>“Sure.”</p><p>Wilford held in a screech. Abe flinched, only to stand perfectly still. He felt hot breathing all over his back. Wilford cupped his mouth shut with his hands.</p><p>
  <em> She’s right behind me, isn’t she. </em>
</p><p>Wilford nodded.</p><p>Happy dog pants, like, <b> <em>I found you! Yay!</em> </b></p><p>
  <em> Should we run…? </em>
</p><p><em> We won’t make it, </em> Wilford warned, looking at Abe with wide eyes. <em> What do we do, Abe? </em></p><p>Abe shuffled forward a step. Charlotte’s tail thumped a bit, but she didn’t move. Another step. Nothing. He was right next to Wilford now, putting a hand on his shoulder and nudging him forward. “Can you run?”</p><p>Wilford blinked at him. “What? Of course, I can run…”</p><p>“I’m gonna give her a treat, you just run the other way.”</p><p>“What-? But what about you?”</p><p>“I’ll be fine.” He sounded surer than he actually felt. “Gimme one of your snacks.”</p><p>He handed Abe his bag, albeit reluctantly. Maybe lists weren’t so bad after all.</p><p>The detective turned around, to meet a large gray muzzle and big brown and black eyes. He could hear Wilford hesitantly run off, and he lifted a bag full of crackers. Tilting her head, the dog sniffed at it with mild interest. Abe was trembling in one place, trying not to run.</p><p>Charlotte opened her mouth, only to lick most of the detective’s arm, making him strain his throat. EVERYTHING WAS WET AND WARM, AND ABE DID <em> NOT </em> LIKE IT. He reeled his arm back and threw the bag into the distance. “<em>GO GET IT! </em>”</p><p>She stared at him before yawning, leisurely plodding after the snacks. Abe ran off to catch up with Wilford, practically screaming. “GOOD DOG!”</p><p>A happy bark, but she was too preoccupied with getting the bag open to follow. As Abe caught up with Wilford, they both sprinted, seeing a familiar short stone wall with a sign.</p><p><em>OH THANK GOD-</em> Abe grinned.</p><p>“<em>FREEDOM! </em>” Wilford spread his arms open wide, then suddenly smacked his face into Abe’s apartment door. They both looked at each other without question and squirmed through the door at the same time.</p><p>Great time to use your powers, Wilford.</p><p>Both landed on the floor, laughing with adrenaline.</p><p>“I’m gonna… go throw up… and then email Harold…” Wilford muttered.</p><p>“Cool… let me proof-read it before you send it…”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Wilford Loves Film (but he also needs a nap)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After sending a <em> very </em> nice email to Harold, Abe insisted Wilford go to bed, only for his friend to whine and protest he was a “grown-ass man”. </p><p>“Grown-ass men don’t call themselves grown-ass men, Wilford. You should get to bed.”</p><p>“‘M not tired!”</p><p>Abe smirked. “You sure about that?”</p><p>“Absolutely positively,” Wilford said, voice slurring. His eyes were half-closed, but he was clearly trying to keep them open. He even shook his head a little bit, trying to hide his yawn. Abe sighed, pulling his friend out of a chair.</p><p>“C’mon, you need to sleep. You had a long day.”</p><p>“Noooooooooo…” He squirmed, trying to get his arm out of Abe’s ridiculously loose grip, with little effect. </p><p>… He <em> was </em>really tired, but Abe didn’t have to know that. “I don’t need to go to bed!”</p><p>“Yes, Wilford, you do.” Abe glared and saw Wilford giving him a wounded puppy-dog look, his bottom lip trembling a bit. Abe sighed. “I’ll let you make me watch a Disney movie tomorrow if you take a nap.”</p><p>His expression immediately brightened. “Frankenweenie.”</p><p>Abe blinked. “What?”</p><p>“‘S a good movie!”</p><p>It… doesn’t necessarily sound like a <em> Disney </em> movie…</p><p>“Yes, it is! It was made by Tim Burton! It was really great and you should watch it! It’s a film about a kid scientist, and the kid has a dog, and he loves the dog, but one day the dog dies and-” He rattled off for at least a minute, and Abe blanked out for a moment. “- of course, if you put them next to more ‘scary’ animated studios like Laika, I’d prefer Paranorman or something, but <em> you </em>said Disney movie-”</p><p>Yeah, okay, whatever that meant. He nodded, trying to still pay attention.</p><p>“- and <em> that’s </em>why horror is completely underrepresented in the animation community! … Dang, should we watch Coraline…?” He beamed, rocking a little bit on his heels and looking expectant.</p><p>“... Breathe, Wilford.”</p><p>Wilford took a deep breath, smiling. “... So?”</p><p>“Sounds cool. Now go take a nap.”</p><p>A very long sigh. “I don’t wannaaaaaa…”</p><p>“Too bad, you’re gonna be in your bed in a few seconds anyway,” Abe replied.</p><p>“No, I’m not!” Wilford shouted, suddenly heard in a different room. Abe was counting the number of seconds for Wilford to realize that he is, in fact, in his room. “DAMMIT!”</p><p>He heard chuckling from behind the door. “Goodnight! We’ll check out Frankendog soon.”</p><p>Wilford pouted, mumbling, “Franken<em>weenie.</em>”</p><p>The title is a <em> lot </em> more fun to say when you’re upset. “Sure, buddy.”</p><p>“It’s not funny!”</p><p>“It’s hilarious.”</p><p>Wilford saw a small blue ball on the floor, and he kicked it. How could Abe make fun of his passion for films like Frankenweenie?! And how could Abe assume that Wilford is tired?! Wilford Warfstache is <em> never </em> tired! Unless he’s stayed up for several days on end because he can. Or done a bit too much legwork. Or gotten sick. Or he over-caffeinated and had a crash.</p><p>Okay, Wilford is a bit tired after today. That didn’t mean he had to like it. Wilford huffed out a breath, flopping on his bed. <em> Fine. </em></p><p>…</p><p>……</p><p>……… <em> This is boriiiiiiiiiing </em>.</p><p><em> GO TO BED </em>.</p><p>
  <em> Fiiiine. </em>
</p><p>Wilford stared up at the ceiling, fingers fiddling lightly. <em> Maybe if I think really hard, it’ll be daytime. </em></p><p>That’s dreaming, but okay. Maybe he should shut his eyes… just for a moment.</p><p> </p><p>Wilford opened his eyes, seeing a gray sky. He sits up, looking around. Everything is a mix of black, gray, and white. The only colors that stood out were Wilford himself. It was almost like he’d been dropped into a silent movie. Birds were chirping in the distance. Grass rustled under his legs.</p><p>His dreams were never this realistic. It was strange and a little bit scary, considering Wilford’s dreams would be crazy and out-of-this-world whenever he’d sleep, but it almost felt peaceful at the same time.</p><p>Wilford sensed something very clay-like run through him like a ghost, and there was suddenly a small dog covered in stitches running in the grass.</p><p>A smile flickered- was he dreaming about Frankenweenie? Wilford got up to his feet, patting his knees to get the dog’s (Sparky?) attention. “Here, boy, come on!”</p><p>The dog was still prancing around in the grass, with a few stitches around his tail going loose, but it didn’t look like it was going to fly off like it did a few times in the film.</p><p>“Sparky!” Wilford called out. The dog was still running, heading up a hill. Just by looking at it, it made Wilford’s legs sore. He groaned. “Nnnnnngggggg… <em> sheesh. </em>” He trundled on after the dog, making clicking noises.</p><p>Wilford was never good with dogs to be perfectly honest. He loves them, of course, but he felt as if he was more of a cat person from what he’d remember. But dogs are the same amount of fun as cats can be anyway, so Wilford didn’t exactly have much of a preference than he thought… maybe a bit more for cats.</p><p>Once Wilford got to the top of the hill, his eyes were focused only on the dog. He was already out of breath because of that hill. He took a stopping point, and watched the dog run off into a sudden field of snow. A small (familiar?) cabin was sitting in the distance.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I saw a flower today. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford turned around at that voice. “Wha…?”</p><p> </p><p><em> Did you really see a flower? </em> a different voice asked, a woman’s voice this time.</p><p>There was a smile with the other voice.</p><p><em> Yes, </em> he answered. <em> A little pink one… </em></p><p>He sounded almost sad. <em> Silly thing. Probably dead by now. </em></p><p>Much of the light is gone now.</p><p>The woman sighed. <em> Get some sleep. You look tired. </em></p><p> </p><p>Wilford opened his eyes, slowly feeling nauseous. He’s not in his bed, he’s not even in Abe’s apartment.</p><p>His fingers gripped, sitting straight up. <em> Abe? </em></p><p>No answer.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You are a hard man to find. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford looked down, seeing gray fur underneath him, with leaves crunching all over the ground. Wilford isn’t dreaming anymore. <em> What…? </em></p><p>He had never, <em> ever </em> teleported while sleeping before… or at least… it <em> was </em> teleportation?</p><p>
  <em> … Abe??? Can you hear me? </em>
</p><p>No response.</p><p>Wilford was almost afraid to move. He knew that he was on top of the big dog Charlotte. Just… pretend it’s Sparky. That might help a little bit.</p><p>Oh, who is he kidding? Pretending isn’t going to help. Wilford is in the middle of the forest that is just forcing him to be sick every time he’s in it, and he’s on top of a potentially killer dog, possibly taking him somewhere to get killed until he comes back.</p><p>Sure, he’s able to come back from the dead, but it’s still scary. What’s even <em> more </em> scary is the woods that make Wilford physically sick for some reason, and it’s NIGHT TIME.</p><p>After just a few minutes, Charlotte has taken Wilford out of the woods. She made it to the same cabin from Wilford’s dream, and lied down near the staircase with Wilford struggling not to fall off of her.</p><p>Charlotte snuffled, but seemed mostly asleep. If Wilford was lucky, maybe he could-</p><p>“<b>I was under the impression you left?</b>” a woman’s voice asked.</p><p>Wilford froze in his position, staring at the gray being in the face. Something about them looked seemingly different. Their hair was a bit longer, for one. And the chestal area was… different, too. They were shorter, slender, effeminate. No facial hair, and they had very dark lipstick on as well. There was a black scarf with white stars all around their throat and chest.</p><p>Wilford gulped, and blushed. “To be fair, ma’am? So did I…”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Dark's design at the end is inspired by Smiledog15578 on Tumblr! Her art is amazing! Please check her out! https://smiledog15578.tumblr.com/post/189928643092/i-give-to-you-aggressive-passive-dark-a-stupid</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Genderfluid Darkiplier Rights</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I just... I really like genderfluid Dark 👉👈</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She didn’t look humored, but she did seem calm. Weirder stuff had happened to her before this, Wilford would bet.</p><p>“<b>Charlotte, would you mind sitting up?</b>”</p><p>Charlotte stared at her, with the moon’s reflection shining off of her eyes. The woman rolled hers in slight impatience, and/or forgetfulness. “<b>Please?</b>”</p><p>The dog’s tail wagged, gently and almost politely letting her front paws push herself up from the ground, only for Wilford to slide off her back and land on his back with an “Umph!”</p><p>“<b>Now, would you like to tell me what the hell you’re doing here?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I woke up in the middle of the woods. I assume Charlotte found me and brought me here.”</p><p>“<b>I thought you made it back to your home?</b>”</p><p>“Oh, no, I did. Abe made me take a nap… he’s gotta be worried…”</p><p>The woman frowned. “<b>You don’t remember leaving your home?</b>”</p><p>“No…?”</p><p>How strange. She wondered if this was supposed to be a point of concern, glancing out the field. It was still dark outside. “<b>Well… come inside. Sit.</b>”</p><p>Wilford hesitated for a moment- Abe clearly hadn’t trusted her, but she didn’t seem like she was angry at him, at least for now. “... Okay.”</p><p>She held the door open for him, and he nodded thankfully, slipping inside, along with Charlotte.</p><p>The cabin felt strangely warmer than before, but the fireplace wasn’t going. Someone had picked up in here- the buckets were still there, but most of the dust and cobwebs had mysteriously vanished. The furniture was picked up.</p><p>It was just a little bit nicer.</p><p>“<b>You and that detective made me realize I haven’t cleaned this place up in a while,</b> ” the woman said. “ <b>Felt nice doing something in the house at least.</b>”</p><p>“It looks pretty good!” Wilford said.</p><p>Something wet poked his shoulder, and he looked up to see Charlotte sniffing at his hair curiously. He pats her muzzle, and she blinked slowly before smiling at him, deigning to sit next to him. </p><p>The woman’s eyebrows raised- Charlotte normally wasn’t one for gentleness, at least not among strangers. The dog rested her head on her paws, yawning toothily. “<b>That’s new.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s fingers fidgeted on the table he sat down at, looking at the woman. She looked <em> kind of </em>familiar, but Wilford couldn’t quite put his finger on it, or even why. “So… uh… how does a woman like yourself come across a dog like that?”</p><p>“<b>Honestly,</b>” the woman rested her chin on her hand, looking over at the dog. “<b>I have no idea. She just showed up one day, this huge puppy who could use a tree as a toy.</b>”</p><p>Wilford tried not to blank out by looking at her. Wow, her jawline is GREAT-</p><p>“Really?” he asked.</p><p>“<b>Yes. I tried to get her to go away, but she’s a stubborn one.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte licked her nose, and she smiled faintly. “<b>See? I wouldn’t necessarily call her a pet, though. She just… does her own thing. Chooses to exist here, with me.</b>”</p><p>“I was kind of assuming you made her,” Wilford replied. “The grays just made me think.”</p><p>The woman stared at him, with a strange expression. Wilford tried to decipher it, not looking away. Her hand lightly tapped the top of the table. “<b>Who knows? Maybe I did.</b>”</p><p>Wilford couldn’t respond to that. He figured this lady was Dark, just by looking at her. “<b>Your, ah… your friend and I got off on the wrong foot earlier.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah, I figured,” Wilford replied, trying to look anywhere else in the cabin then Dark. “He gets too ambitious, sometimes… and when I say sometimes, I mean often. Funny how we were rivals before, he’d chase me a lot, for stuff I wasn’t guilty for.”</p><p>“<b>A man after my own heart,</b>” she said, somewhat dryly. “<b>I was only curious.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted. “About what?”</p><p>Dark glanced at him, frowning. “<b>... Nothing important.</b>”</p><p>He could tell she was lying, but decided it would be rude to push her.</p><p>“Hey, uh… Dark, why do I keep getting sick when I go to the woods?”</p><p>She blinked. “<b>What? How do you get sick?</b>”</p><p>“I just get… really nauseous really quick? And I feel weak? Abe had to carry me in and out.”</p><p>Dark almost looked contemplative. “<b>Huh… I don’t think anybody else would go sick in my woods. Sure, Charlotte doesn’t like strangers and she’s able to make them uncomfortable, but… never physically sick.</b>”</p><p>“I don’t think it’s Charlotte’s fault,” Wilford replied, waving a hand. “I mean, Abe doesn’t seem to be affected by it at all, and neither did the guy who told us where to find you.”</p><p>“<b>What </b> <b> <em>guy?</em> </b>” Dark asked, suddenly stern. </p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I dunno who he is. Just some guy.”</p><p>He did his best not to think about Harold. Dark’s black lips pursed, but she said nothing. “<b>Well, I’m sorry that my forest makes you feel that way. I’m not entirely sure what to do to help you with that.</b>”</p><p>“It’s alright,” Wilford had a small smile on his face. “I’m tough. I can handle being sick for a while.”</p><p>Says the person that admitted he had to be carried in and out of the forest multiple times.</p><p>“<b>Good for you,</b>” Dark replied.</p><p>Wilford beamed. “Well, I can’t say for sure whether or not you stole… whatever Abe wants to find, but nevertheless, I enjoy you.”</p><p>“<b>I suppose that’s fair.</b>”</p><p>Silence for a moment. Charlotte yawned again, resting her head - well, her entire jaw - on Wilford’s leg. “... She’s a sweet dog.”</p><p>The woman frowned. “<b>What do you mean? Charlotte’s vicious.</b>”</p><p>The only vicious thing about Charlotte was that she was getting a little bit of drool on his pants. He put his hand on her nose, and her tail tapped the floor. Wilford looked at Dark, smirking. “You sure about that?”</p><p>“<b>Of course,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>It depends. You’ve seen her earlier today.</b>”</p><p>“But maybe she just wanted to play. She didn’t bite either of us or anything!”</p><p>“<b>She might have thought you’d taste strange.</b>”</p><p>Why was Dark so insistent on Charlotte being a vicious animal? She’s literally just a big sweetheart.</p><p>“I, um… I think I need to go soon. Abe might wake up without me and get worried.”</p><p>“<b>Why? Do you live together?</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted, like a puppy. “… Yes?”</p><p>Dark looked perplexed. “<b>Huh.</b>”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“<b>Nothing.</b>”</p><p>Wilford kept staring at her, knowing that she might be hiding something. It was something, Wilford just didn’t know what. He saw Dark looking back at him and down at the table multiple times before standing up.</p><p>“<b>You’re right,</b>” she said. “<b>You should get going. I can help you on the way back, if you’d like.</b>”</p><p>“I’d say that’s not necessary, but we’d both know that’d be a lie.”</p><p>She chuckled softly, standing back and dusting herself off. Dark held out a hand, helping Wilford up. “<b>Let us be off, then. Come, Charlotte, please.</b>”</p><p>The dog shook her head, rising. It really made Wilford think about how big she was when her ears were flattened against the ceiling. She grinned at him, shouldering through the doorway.</p><p><em>Big dog,</em> he marveled.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Yes. Sometimes it still baffles me.</em></b>
</p><p>They began the trek back in silence. Dark kept sneaking little glances at Wilford whenever she thought he wasn’t looking. He was, he just didn’t say anything of it.</p><p>Before even setting foot on the trail into the woods, Wilford stopped. Dark looked back at him, already a few feet in on the trail. “<b>Coming?</b>”</p><p>Wilord wasn’t saying anything, staring up at the trees while holding his hands up against his chest. Dark could sense that he wasn’t getting sick, but she could tell he was uncomfortable. At least he’s aware.</p><p>“<b>Are you alright, Will?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“‘M fine.” Wilford kept his eyes on the trees.</p><p>Dark sighed lightly, her frown deepening. <b> <em>No you’re not.</em> </b></p><p>She walked over to him, with Charlotte passing by them both. With Wilford knowing that Charlotte ‘does her own thing’, he had no reason to ask why she kept walking in the forest.</p><p>Dark put a hand on his shoulder. “<b>Are you sure you’re okay?</b>”</p><p>Wilford nodded, not looking at her. “Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”</p><p>“<b>Because I’ve never seen anyone get sick in this forest before. Ever.</b>”</p><p>Wilford forced a smile. “I must be pretty special, then.”</p><p>
  <b> <em>You sure are.</em> </b>
</p><p>“What was that~?”</p><p>“<b><em>Hey,</em> </b> <b> wow, these woods sure do make you uncomfortable!</b>” Dark’s tone changed in an instant… a tone that REALLY doesn’t suit her, the more Wilford thought about it. “<b>We need to find a way to get you home without feeling sick five times in one day!</b>”</p><p>Wilford raised a hand. “Um, it’s really not that necess-”</p><p>“<b>Of course it is!</b>” she chirped, in that same eerily ‘happy’ tone. “<b>I insist!</b>”</p><p><em> Okay… </em> Wilford tugged at his collar, not wanting to go along with Dark, but… wanting to go along with her simultaneously. He couldn’t really explain it. It just… felt natural. Why would this feel natural?</p><p>He toddered along after her, choosing to stare at her instead of the forest to keep him from being nauseous- what? No, it’s not because he thinks she’s attractive, why would you think that he thinks that-</p><p>Wilford’s face had a pleasant sort of burn as he tried not to let himself spiral. He felt a pair of fingernails gently wrapping around his hand, and his small nausea (number 6 and a half?) episode went away almost completely.</p><p>Wilford almost jumped, his small blush worsening as Dark reached up with her other hand, fingers trailing down the back of his neck. Dark chuckled softly. “<b>Trust me, this will help you.</b>”</p><p>“I- if you say so-” Wilford tried not to squirm.</p><p>A small poke on the neck, and Wilford reached back to itch the spot immediately. “Agk! What’d you just do?”</p><p>“<b>Stop scratching it.</b>” Dark placed her hand on Wilford’s to drag it away from his neck. “<b>I’ve done this with myself before. It works, believe me.</b>”</p><p>“It hurts,” Wilford complained, rubbing the center of his neck. Dark hummed, pressing her hand against his neck again.</p><p>“<b>I know. Just relax.</b>” Her voice was very calm. It was soothing, almost. Wilford tried to remember all the times Abe would tell him to calm down, along with different kinds of strategies, but not a whole lot was coming to mind. Abe had always been better at this sort of thing than Wilford was.</p><p>“<b>Put your shoulders down for me,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Loosen your eyebrows, and unclench your jaw. It’ll help you relax a bit.</b>”</p><p>Wilford only knew what to do for half of those. His jaw is always unclenched when he’s talking, so that part was easy. He just had to keep his mouth shut. A bit more difficult there, but Dark knew he did his best. She patted Wilford’s hair, and they walked on.</p><p>“<b>How are you feeling?</b>” She asked softly, a few minutes later. Wilford’s only answer was a small pause and a shrug.</p><p>“Fine?” he asked-answered.</p><p>“<b>Are you sure?</b>”</p><p>“Yeaaaaaaah…?” Wilford’s shoulders tensed as he answered, which was the complete opposite of what he was supposed to do in order to not get sick. Dark shot him a look.</p><p>“<b>I’m going to let go of your hand,</b>” Dark said, still calm. “<b>And you tell me if you feel uncomfortable.</b>”</p><p>Wilford has been feeling uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons for the past half hour, but alright. Dark let go slowly, backing away. Just after a few seconds, Wilford’s head leaned over, and he groaned quietly. He immediately grabbed Dark’s arm. “Nope, no no no no no, nononono…”</p><p>“<b>Alright- alright, calm down.</b>” Dark held Wilford upright with her free hand. Wilford pressed a hand over his mouth, closing his eyes. “<b>Do you want me to call Charlotte over? She could carry us.</b>”</p><p>Wilford tried to swallow. “That… that might be nice…”</p><p>Dark made a sort of clicking noise, and before Wilford knew it, the dog had silently appeared behind them, like an adorable eldritch abomination meme. Then she sneezed, and just looked like a giant dog again. Wilford moaned, shutting his eyes tight.</p><p>“<b>It will be very quick, Will,</b>” Dark said, keeping her hands on him. “<b>Just keep your eyes closed if you need to.</b>”</p><p>Wilford just nodded, suddenly plopping his face on Charlotte’s back. “Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… you smell good………”</p><p>“<b>She just had a bath yesterday.</b>” Dark climbed on Charlotte, sitting behind Wilford.</p><p>Wilford mumbled… something. Dark didn’t think about it.</p><p>Wilford was sleepy. He kept his eyes shut, at least <em> trying </em> to take a nap on Charlotte, but she was moving so much that he really couldn’t. She was doing her best to be as little jostle-y as possible, which Dark could appreciate. Charlotte’s a good girl.</p><p>After a while, Dark nudged Wilford awake. “<b>We’re here.</b>”</p><p>The change in Dark’s voice was almost startling, but Wilford hid his surprise because… well. Guess.</p><p>Wilford rubbed his eyes open, seeing an apartment building in front of him. It was his home… “How’d you know where to go?”</p><p>Dark shrugged. “<b>Charlotte followed your friend’s scent, I suppose.</b>”</p><p>Wilford looked over his shoulder, seeing that Dark’s look had changed. The black scarf is gone, the hair is shorter and a bit messier, the facial hair is back, and there was no makeup. How handsome! </p><p>Wilford gaped at him a few seconds before staring at Charlotte's fur. “So… um… I guess I should get going…”</p><p>“<b>I suppose you should. It was a pleasure.</b>” Dark glanced over at him. “<b>I hope to see you again in the future, Will.</b>”</p><p>“Of- Of course!” Wilford grinned, almost uncontrollably. “I do, too!”</p><p>Dark gave him a tiny little smile. “<b>Say hello to Abe for me.</b>”</p><p>“I will, I will.”</p><p>The other man’s expression was warm, if only for a moment. Wilford smiled back, and he began to slide off of Charlotte. Her tail was wagging, either because “<b><em>Finally, this guy’s gonna get off of me, now it’s just me and Parent! </em> </b> ” or “<b><em>Can I come in and sniff the other guy so I can track him down if we need to kill him? </em> </b>”</p><p>If it was the latter, then Wilford might have a bit of a problem. Dark caught his hand before he shimmied off, blurting, “<b>Wait-</b>”</p><p>Wilford paused. “Yes?” </p><p>“<b>... It... really was nice to see you,</b>” he murmured.</p><p>“And the same to you, Dark.”</p><p>Wilford didn’t let go, and they stared at each other before Dark sighed.</p><p>
  <b> <em>You really are special…</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> Huh? </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>Um- nothing- oh, look, butterflies!</em> </b>
</p><p>“<em>OOH! </em>” Wilford immediately spun around to look for the said butterflies, but spotted nothing. He turned back, and Dark and Charlotte were suddenly gone. Wilford frowned. “Aw…”</p><p>“Wilford?”</p><p>He looked up, seeing Abe poke his head out of his window. He looked furious. “Where the <em> hell </em>were you?! Get in here!”</p><p>Wilford gulped.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Protective Detective (say that 10 times fast)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“It wasn’t my fault!”</p><p>“Like hell, it wasn’t!”</p><p>Wilford sat at the table, with Abe pacing around the living room like he was in the middle of an interrogation… again. “How’d you even get outside?!”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I dunno! I was up and about!”</p><p>The detective tried to hold back a shriek. “You had me worried sick! You’ve been gone for hours!”</p><p>“I’m sorry!” Wilford raised his voice. “Honest!”</p><p>“You’ve gotten yourself in trouble during this whole investigation,” Abe put a finger up, still pacing. “You’ve gotten Harold pissed off at you when he was supposed to help us, you got yourself sick <em> multiple </em> times in the woods, you insist that you’re not tired when you haven’t even looked at yourself in the mirror, and then to top it all off, you <em> lie </em> to me that you’re gonna go to sleep when you’re really ‘up and about’!”</p><p>“What are you talking about?!” Wilford asked. “I slept just fine until I woke up in the middle of nowhere!”</p><p>“Bull. Roar. What’s going on with you? Why do you keep saying you’re fine when you’re not?”</p><p>Wilford struggled not to roll his eyes- his friend was being ridiculous. “Oh, what do you <em>wa</em><em>nt</em> from me, then?”</p><p>Abe threw his hands up in the air, screaming, “I WANT YOU TO <em> CARE!!! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Just because I’m not weeping like a child doesn’t mean I don’t care. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford sat up with a frown. What was that…? He stared over at Abe, who still looked angry, but his posture softened a little. “What?”</p><p>“I thought I heard… me? It sounded like me…?”  His voice trailed off, and he looked around, like he could find the voice that way.</p><p>Abe walked over to him, on the other side of the table. “The hell are you talking about?”</p><p>Wilford stood up, fingers shaking. “I heard somebody! In my head! You didn’t hear it?”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> … I can’t believe you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>It was the voice from before. The flower boy. Wilford clapped a hand over his mouth, muffling a shriek. <em> Why can’t you hear them?!? </em></p><p>“Hear what?” Abe was beside him now, clasping Wilford’s shoulders and shaking him a little bit. Wilford could see the concern in his eyes. “Wilford, <em> hear what?!? </em>”</p><p>“I DUNNO, <em> SOMEBODY! </em>”</p><p>Wilford was suddenly crying, some guy was shouting in his head about the ‘little boy’s room’ and stairs, and Abe was doing his hardest not to freak Wilford out further. “Jesus- Uh- Wilford, are you…”</p><p>He knew that asking “ArE yOu OkAy?” might have been a rhetorical question with the sudden state Wilford was in, so Abe stopped himself. “Do you want to sit, or something? Need some water?”</p><p>“No,” Wilford muttered, rubbing his eyes with his sleeve. His voice was very small. “I wanna stay up.”</p><p>“Okay,” Abe said, without protest. “Wanna watch your… franken… dog… movie?”</p><p>Well… Wilford <em> did </em> dream of it before he woke up-</p><p>“No.”</p><p>What?! Abe stared at him for a moment. “Well- well, what <em> do </em>you wanna do?”</p><p>“Something that isn’t nothing,” Wilford mumbled.</p><p>The detective bit his lip for a moment before steering Wilford to the couch, gently having him sit down. He turned on some random program before sauntering to the kitchen, coming back a bit later with a bowl of popcorn. He placed it in front of Wilford before grabbing a blanket, draping it over his friend’s lap before sitting down next to him. “... Should I put on one of those cartoons you like?”</p><p>“Excuse you, sir, Samurai Jack is not a ‘cartoon’,” Wilford muttered, with a very flat tone. He hadn’t quite forgiven him for all the screaming earlier. “It’s a visual and auditory masterpiece.”</p><p>“Visual and auditory masterpiece it is, then.” Abe put the show on and carefully sat down next to a very stiff Wilford.</p><p>After a while, Wilford seemed to relax a little bit, his eyes glazed over. A few episodes in and he was giggling softly, curled up in his blanket. It took the entirety of disk one for both of them to let their guards down, timidly leaning against each other while Abe snuck popcorn from the bowl. Abe didn’t exactly see it, but he was guessing that Wilford was sleeping. He didn’t want to move, but he didn’t want to get back to <em> his </em> beauty sleep either.</p><p>After a moment or two, after Abe has secretly watched all of the ‘behind the scenes’ featurette videos, he could see Wilford squirming around in his blanket. It made him look like a baby wrapped like a burrito. Abe smirked, finishing off the popcorn. Wilford tipped over on the other side of the couch, stretching himself free from the burrito blanket. He looked… mildly uncomfortable again. He was gripping his chest, taking multiple breaths.</p><p><em> Jeez. </em> Abe leaned over, putting a hand on Wilford’s knee. “You alright?”</p><p>Wilford wiped his eyes, gritting his teeth. He was almost growling, frustrated. “Sorry.”</p><p>Abe frowned. He was clueless as to why Wilford has been acting so uncharacteristically down today, but he still wanted to help. “There anything you want me to do, bud?”</p><p>Wilford didn’t answer for a moment, his eyes trained to the hand on his knee. “I think I want to be by myself for a bit. Not so sure why.”</p><p>“Alright…” The hand retracted, and Wilford closed his eyes. “Let me know if you need anything, okay?”</p><p>Wilford smiled, finally. “Always, 私の友人.”</p><p>Abe sort of forced a smile, and let Wilford get up from the couch to go to his room. Once he was out of his sight, Abe’s smile went away. He was… really worried. What the hell is up with Wilford tonight? From what Abe would remember, Wilford was never this upset or quiet before.</p><p>Whatever it was that was making Wilford this way, Abe wanted to get to the bottom of it. Because being sad sucks. <em> Definitely </em> not because he cares.</p><p>Pursing his lips, Abe took the remote and turned the TV off. It flickered blue and red, and Abe got up from the couch to hit it a few times. It stopped. He didn’t think much of it.</p><p>In Wilford’s room, he’s lying down on his bed, holding onto his tiny red gem he hid in his hood (and pocket) the <em> entire </em> night. He was humming a song from another one of his CDs, a song that was actually calming and slow, unlike most of them. “<em>Linger on, your pale blue eyes…</em>”</p><p>What a day.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>私の友人 - "My friend" in Japanese</p><p>Also, I know little to nothing about Samurai Jack, leave that to AskError. They know the show much more than I do. XD</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. What if THEY had something to do with it?!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was early when Abe woke up. Still dark outside. Very quiet.</p><p>He couldn’t quite go back to sleep, not after what happened in the last chapter just a few hours ago between him and Wilford. Heck, half of the night had been spent worrying over the damned fool.</p><p>How had he snuck out last night? Why had he lied to him? What in the world got him so sick in the middle of the woods anyway?!</p><p>And… how on earth could he do anything about it?</p><p>Abe wasn’t so sure, and he hated it. It was the worst feeling in the world for him, having all the questions running in his head, but none of the answers.</p><p>What was Abe thinking? All of that shouldn’t even matter to him right now. He was supposed to be thinking about the case. That’s it. Day three, and Abe still hasn’t gotten any clues about where it is besides the damn cabin in the field, and the woods that even <em> he </em> doesn’t like going through because it makes Wilford him feel sick.</p><p>Plus, giant dog. Giant dog is big no no. Giant dog is death.</p><p>Abe sighed, tapping his hand on the top of his table. He took a sip of coffee from his mug, gazing outside his window. Still dark outside, but there was a small tint of light reflecting off of some clouds in the distance. He shook his head, walking over to the computer and pulling up his emails. Maybe Harold had responded? Just a bunch of curses in all caps.</p><p><em> Welp. </em> Abe shut his computer off, sitting back on his chair. Seemed Harold was still a little angry about the whole thing, and rightfully so. After thinking about it, he typed back a response, and a few minutes later Harold had messaged back again, a little bit calmer. Still kinda pissed, though.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I’m sorry Wilford ticked you off yesterday, he’s really sick right now. We’ve got some information about Darkiplier though, if you still want it. - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>I honestly could care less about your friend right now. Gimme the goodies of Darkiplier. - Harold</em>”</p><p>“<em>Noted, and understandable. Your thing was right about the gray spots. The further in we got, the grayer it was. Some people seem to be affected by it, especially you-know-who... also, Dark’s got a big-ass guard dog. - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Guard dog? - Harold</em>”</p><p>“<em>Oh, yeah. Charlotte. She’s </em> huge <em> . Looks like a big retriever, but she’s gray and about the size of a house. And no, I’m not pulling your leg or anything… so she’s not a lion or a bear, like you said - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Huh. Glad I never ran into her, then. - Harold</em>”</p><p>“<em>Yeah she’s scary as hell. We haven't found the diamond yet… my strongest bet is that it’s with Darkiplier, though. I just don’t know where they’re keeping it. I’ll keep you updated when I can. - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Aye-aye. I’ll be here finding out how to make a time machine to make sure your friend doesn’t sleep with my grandmother. - Harold</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Abe laughed.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>You do that, then. - A. L</em>”</p><p>“<em>Gotcha. Bye. - Harold</em>”</p><p> </p><p>That was… more civilized than Abe initially thought. Harold seemed to be surprisingly reasonable, which you wouldn’t expect by knowing him for more than three seconds. He seemed very… excitable. Maybe it was the thing about the time machine.</p><p>Abe started to wonder if Wilford was still in the apartment. He <em> had </em>snuck out earlier, after all… should he go check on him?</p><p><em> Let’s do it. </em> Abe got up from the table and headed over to Wilford’s room. <em> Please be asleep, please be asleep, please be asleep… </em></p><p>He peeked his head in through the cracked open door, and Wilford’s back was facing him from the other side of the room. His breathing was soft, but he was shivering a little bit. There was a clear rip around where his hood would have been. Abe hesitated a moment before crossing the doorway, turning off the fan on Wilford’s desk. </p><p>
  <em> No wonder he’s cold, it’s like the arctic in here. </em>
</p><p>He wondered if he should do anything else…</p><p>Nah. Wilford was a grown-ass man. He could do what he wanted. Abe kept the door cracked open, and he left the room quietly. There was a quiet snort, but that was all.</p><p>Wilford had been… acting really weird, ever since they took on this case, ever since they’d entered the forest… Ever since they’d met Dark.</p><p>What was Abe going to do?</p><p>He glanced out the window to see his car, sitting between his apartment and the other next door. It was getting more and more bright outside.</p><p>Maybe he ought to pay his suspect a little visit.</p><p>Abe grabbed a blank sticky piece of paper from an unused notepad - which is a rarity - and a marker.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Wilford - Morning. I’m off to go get some coffee. There are snacks in the cupboards and in the fridge. If you feel sick, there’s medicine in the bathroom. I might be out longer than usual, so do something that doesn’t get you in trouble while I’m gone. Jam out, watch TV, don’t barf, and have fun. See you later.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>     - Abe</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Abe left the note on the other side of Wilford’s door. He put his jacket on, took his keys, and went outside to his car.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Abe’s Off To See the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of- Oh god oh no not THEM</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Knock knock knock knock knock.</p><p>“<b>Go away.</b>”</p><p>Knock knock.</p><p>“<b>Go </b> <b> <em>away.</em> </b>”</p><p>… Knockknockknockknockknockknockknockknockknockknockknockknock-</p><p>The latch on the door, as well as the hinges, locks, and general door frame, shrieked as a partially dressed man threw the door open. “<b><em>WHAT PART OF ‘GO AWAY’ DO YOU PEOPLE NOT UNDER</em> </b> <b>- oh. It’s you.</b>”</p><p>Abe snorted, too pissed to notice Dark wasn’t exactly wearing a shirt. “No shit, ‘it’s me’. Let me in.”</p><p>Dark put both hands on each side of the doorframe. “<b>You shouldn’t have come back, detective. It’s not safe all the way out here.</b>”</p><p>“You’re not the boss of me,” Abe replied, scowling. “I’ve done enough research to know that something like <em> you </em> must have something to do with the diamond, <em> and </em> getting my partner sick, now <em> let me in.</em>”</p><p>“<b>Will is still sick?</b>”</p><p>“<em>Stop calling him that! </em>”</p><p>Dark scoffed. “<b>That’s his name, isn’t it?</b>”</p><p>The two glared at each other for a hot minute before Dark stepped aside, allowing for Abe to come in.</p><p>“<b>What do you want to know?</b>” Dark asked as Abe was quite rudely looking around. Charlotte was glaring at him through a window outside.</p><p>“What did you do to him?” Abe’s voice was echoing through the fireplace, and Dark scoffed again.</p><p>“<b>If I wanted to ‘do’ anything malicious to either of you, Abraham, it would have been you. You give me too much credit.</b>”</p><p>Abe’s head harshly bumped on the top of the fireplace once he got out of it. “Ow, <em> fuck- </em> What’s that supposed to mean?”</p><p>Dark’s arms were crossed. “<b>From what I remember, you two were rivals? You’d chase after Will for things he wasn’t guilty for?</b>”</p><p>“That… was a very long time ago. I’m not proud of it.” Abe was rubbing his head with his palm. “Wilford just helped me one night, and we truced, that’s all.”</p><p>Sure.</p><p>Dark crossed the room, rummaging through his closet… that was under his bed. “<b>If that’s all, why did you come all this way to hound me, instead of staying with him?</b>”</p><p>“Because I know you have something to do with Wilford being sick in the middle of the woods!” Abe exclaimed, losing his composure. “I literally <em> just </em> said before I came here!”</p><p>Dark waved a hand. “<b><em>I</em> </b> <b> have nothing to do with him being sick, nor would I wish to. The forest has been like this for as long as I can remember.</b>”</p><p>Abe caught Charlotte almost winking through the window, and he shook his head.</p><p>“<em>I </em> went through the woods completely fine,” he said. “I’m pretty sure <em> anybody </em> that went through the woods was fine besides your guard dog out there. Wilford was physically sick!”</p><p>Dark shrugged, almost dismissively.</p><p>“<b>I don’t know what to tell you. I’m sorry he’s sick, but I had nothing to do with it.</b>” His tone was firm. “<b>Neither did Charlotte for that matter.</b>”</p><p>Abe fell silent. He glanced down and saw his hand resting on his vest pocket that held his gun. By now, Dark had picked out a violet button-up and had his back turned.</p><p>Abe could shoot Dark right now and turn him in for… stealing the diamond. Right. Dark is a clear suspect after all. Abe has heard of the saying ‘Ask first, shoot later’, but he really wanted to turn the phrase around, just for the fifty thousandth time <em>once.</em></p><p>Dark is a suspect for getting his partner acting weird as well… even though he literally just said he had nothing to do with it. But what if whatever made Wilford act weird permanently changes him? What if he actually dies from it? Abe has lost partners before, and Wilford is definitely one of the luckiest ones. He is one of Abe’s closest ones, at best.</p><p>Before Abe could even try to decide over what he wanted to do, Dark turned back around, buttoning up his shirt.</p><p><em> Dammit. </em>Abe saw Dark glancing at him.</p><p>“<b>Why so tense, detective?</b>” he asked, folding his collar down, almost… teasingly. “<b>I have nothing to hide.</b>”</p><p>“Sure ya don’t,” Abe mumbled, glaring around in a different direction. The sink looked weirdly crooked.</p><p>“<b>No wonder people found you pushy,</b>” Dark said, only with Abe to ignore him. He went over to the sink to get a closer look as to why it was so oddly placed.</p><p>There was a tiny mouse-sized crack in the wall from behind the sink. Strange.</p><p>“<b>What are you doing over there?</b>” Dark asked. Abe didn’t give an answer. It was internal solving time.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Last time Wilford and I were here, I left him alone in the cabin while Dark and I were talking over a bunch of things I’d give less shits about… </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>How rude.</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> The diamond that we still have to find is supposed to be about the same size as this hole, but from what I remember before Dark and I went outside, the sink was completely normal… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Did Wilford just…?! </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Abe gasped loudly. Dark gave him a very unsure look. “<strong>Are y</strong><b>ou alright there, detective?</b>”</p><p>The detective tried not to look obvious as he headed to the door. “Y- Yeah, I’m fine! Doing just peachy! I- I just remembered that I left my stove on when I left, and Wilford is super bad with food! OKAY,GOTTAGO!”</p><p>Abe dashed right out of the cabin, leaving Dark a bit clueless. He wasn’t able to catch on what was happening in his head.</p><p>Strange man, that Abraham.</p><p>Dark peered at the sink, wondering what the fuss was all about.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Do you think he saw it? I don’t remember the sink being this crooked before. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t be dumb, of course he didn’t see it. I think there were just a bunch of weird maggots in there. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark rubbed his temple, groaning. He leaned over to the sink, seeing nothing. Absolutely nothing.</p><p>He stood up straight, face twitching. “<b>Oh no…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> … Shit. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He found it? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He found it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> … Shit. </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. The Loudest Voice is Mine… and My Dog’s</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dark kept pacing across the cabin. <b> <em>… Maybe he doesn’t know what he found.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Do you think- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Maybe- </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>Absolutely not.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Abe seemed so worried... He could be hurting. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That doesn’t matter. What matters is that Wilford has the diamond. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark squished his face with his hands. “<b>Uggggghhhh…</b>”</p><p>This was bad.</p><p>Really, really bad.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Will is gonna get himself hurt with this. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You don’t think I don’t know that? Should we do something about it? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Sure, like we’re gonna go up to Abe’s apartment again and kindly ask him to return the diamond when he clearly doesn’t remember what the diamond is for! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The diamond was Mark’s, Will could get hurt! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t you think I know that, you- </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark was gripping at his hair. “<b>Will </b> <b> <em>both of you SHUT UP?!? </em> </b>”</p><p>Both the voices halted. Dark sat down with his face in his hands. “<b>Alright… alright… Thank you…</b>”</p><p> </p><p><em> .</em><em>.</em><em>. </em> <em> S</em><em>o</em><em>r</em><em>r</em><em>y</em><em>. </em></p><p> </p><p>“<b>Zip it!</b>” Dark pounded his fist, and the voices were silenced again. He took a deep breath and sighed. “<b>Okay. Will has the diamond. The diamond belonged to Mark. Mark’s blood is on this diamond, therefore it should be kept away from everybody… especially Will. So now, I need to find it all over again, and likely steal it back before something worse happens to him.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> And I’m sure that you being upset that Will remembers Abe, but not you, has absolutely nothing to do with it. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark did not respond.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I thought as much. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark only rolled his eyes. <b> <em>So what if it does. I know it bothers you both, too.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Will was never meant to remember us. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s better this way. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>… That doesn’t mean I have to like it.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p><em> W</em><em>e </em> <em> k</em><em>n</em><em>o</em><em>w</em><em>. </em></p><p> </p><p>Dark was looking up at the ceiling as if he was actually talking to somebody. <b> <em>And it doesn’t mean </em> </b> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <b> <em> have to like it either.</em> </b></p><p>There wasn’t any response to that.</p><p>Charlotte’s head poked in through the door, able to distract Dark from his voices. She squirmed in the cabin just to rest her muzzle on him. Dark was mumbling. “<b>Go chew a tree apart.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte, who didn’t want to go chew a tree apart, was whining softly until Dark looked up at her with a sigh. “<b>Sweetheart, no. I’m not in the mood.</b>”</p><p>There was a not-so-gentle nudge, with Dark’s cheek pressed against the window. “<b>No, Charlotte- I don’t want to play right now.</b>”</p><p>The dog huffed out through her nose, and Dark hacked. Charlotte backed away, heading towards the door, stopping on the deck outside. She was just sitting there, with her front paws crossed together, almost impatiently.</p><p><b><em>Parent, we have to get the tiny shiny back!</em></b> Charlotte simply licked her nose.</p><p>Dark rubbed his cheek and sighed again.</p><p>“<b>We’re not going to that apartment again,</b> ” he said. “ <b>Besides, the detective might be there before us and scold us. He probably won’t let us inside.</b>”</p><p>
  <b> <em>But if we don’t get the tiny shiny back, the pink man will be acting funny and you’ll be sad.</em> </b>
</p><p>“<b>He’s always acting funny, Charlotte.</b>”</p><p>The dog let out a long, gaping yawn. <b> <em>More</em> </b> <b> <em> funny, Parent!</em> </b></p><p>She is right, though. Will had always been an agent of fun and unknowable chaos. But now, it wasn’t held back by the walls of sanity, for a long while. He must be practically used to it by now.</p><p>Charlotte clawed on some wood. <b> <em>You don’t like the acting boy, right? The tiny shiny is a thing related to the acting boy. You don’t want the pink man to know anything about the acting boy, so we gotta get the tiny shiny back!</em> </b></p><p>As much as he hated to admit it, she was right. Even if Charlotte wasn’t around as much as Dark has, it feels like she has the same amount of knowledge of what’s going on, even if she can’t speak to show it. It’s funny how dogs work.</p><p>Dark gave her a weak smile. He got up and went to the deck, pressing a kiss to the tip of Charlotte’s nose. “<b>Very well then.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte’s tail wagged, and she leapt off the deck to run off in the field. There was nothing left to do but follow.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Everyone is Here!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What diamond?”</p><p>“You know what diamond.”</p><p>“Hmmmm…” Wilford was rubbing his chin with his finger. “Nope. I’m afraid not.”</p><p>Abe held back a sigh. “That’s okay. We can just… look around your room if we have to.”</p><p>“What?” Wilford blinked.</p><p>Abe turned to him. “Yeah. I’m gonna be in here for a bit, and you’ve got to help.”</p><p>“What-? But- I don’t-!”</p><p>“You have a small room, Wilford, it’ll be fine,” Abe replied. “We can clean everything up once we’re done, you just gotta help me.”</p><p>“I don’t want to!” Wilford’s old bossy, cheery self was slowly coming back, but at the worst possible time.</p><p>“Come on, Wilford, this is serious,” Abe said.</p><p>“Oh, it’s <em> always </em> serious with you, detective!” Wilford rubbed his head, and shook it off like it was nothing. “I don’t wanna do this right now! Can’t we just go get waffles and ignore whatever you’re looking for for a bit?”</p><p>“We will later,” Abe replied, already lifting a pillow from Wilford’s bed. “This is more important right now.”</p><p>There was a pause, and Wilford pouted. “… Fine… fine, if it’s so important to <em> you. </em>”</p><p>He stomped over to his desk and pulled out each and every drawer. Wilford peered over his shoulder, sniffing.</p><p>“Feeling any better?” Abe asked, voice muffled underneath Wilford’s blankets.</p><p>“Much, actually,” Wilford said, blindly digging his hand through one of his drawers filled with pens, fidget toys, empty gun shells, and other random objects. “I’d rather feel better than pay attention to the whatever you’re looking for right now…”</p><p>He grabbed a drawer and turned it over, only for things to fall out of it. “But I guess you always have other plans.”</p><p>Must explain why he’s so grumpy the second Abe mentioned looking around his room.</p><p>“I’m sorry I had to wake you up. Once we’re done here, we can go get waffles- how’s that sound?”</p><p>“I… suppose that’s fine.”</p><p>Wilford was still very pouty, though. He must still be sick.</p><p>“Thanks, buddy,” Abe replied.</p><p>“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Another turn-over and objects fell out of another drawer. Wilford sighed quietly, and paused for a moment. “... I’m really sorry.”</p><p>“For what?” Abe asked.</p><p>“For… for making you stressed, for always making you feel like you have to worry about me.”</p><p>Abe somehow knew this was coming.</p><p>“I know I goof off too much,” Wilford continued, crouching down on the floor to dig through some of his objects. “I know I say and do things I don’t mean to, I know you don’t believe me when I tell the truth, I know there's a lot of things wrong with me… I just don’t know where it’s all coming from, and I brush it off like it’s nothing, you know?”</p><p>Abe slowly nodded. “Probably not a good thing that you’re ignoring your problems, though…”</p><p>“I try not to,” Wilford said. “I’m aware of them, I just don’t know what to do to try and fix them so they could all go away.”</p><p>Abe ducked down to his stomach to peek under Wilford’s bed. “I don’t think you can <em> fix </em> your problems… maybe the best way to put it is trying to find your way around them so these kinds of things don’t happen as much.”</p><p>“They can still happen, though,” Wilford sounded unsure.</p><p>“Yeah, but I don’t think that’s a bad thing,” Abe replied, stretching his arm to the other side of Wilford’s bed. Everything was dusty. “Things just happen to happen, mistakes are meant to be made, and it all just means that you’re trying. And that’s okay.”</p><p>Wilford looks at Abe…’s side. “Are you sure…?”</p><p>Though Wilford couldn’t see it, Abe was smiling with his head stuffed under the bed. “Positive. You’re a good guy.”</p><p>“If you say so.”</p><p>“I do say so.”</p><p>Wilford was trying hard not to beam.</p><p>Man… Abe is so cool. Detectiving isn’t, but Abe is an exception.</p><p>After a long moment or so, with Wilford piling up his stuff back in his drawer and Abe searching all over the apartment, they both sat on the couch.</p><p>“Find it yet?” Wilford asked.</p><p>Abe was rubbing his temple. “No. You?”</p><p>Wilford shook his head. “Nope. Is that a problem if we don’t find it?”</p><p>“… Nah. It’s probably not here, anyways.”</p><p>Wilford sat back on a cushion. “Pretty sure I had it though… Don’t know where I put it.”</p><p><em> I </em> <b> <em>knew</em> </b> <em> it, </em> Abe held in his breath.</p><p>“Where… is it…” Wilford tapped his chin, humming softly.</p><p><em> I </em> <b> <em>fucking</em> </b> <em> knew it, </em> Abe’s fingers tapped on his knees repeatedly. Wilford slid off of the couch, pondering.</p><p>“<em>Where oh where oh where is shiny,</em>” he sang to himself. “<em>Where oh where oh where is shiny… Where oh where oh where is shiny… Where could shiny be? </em>”</p><p>A knock was on the door. “<b>I was going to ask the same thing.</b>”</p><p>Abe and Wilford stood straight up simultaneously, only for Wilford to accidentally bang his head against the table, but he shook it off only because he was so surprised. “Darkie!”</p><p>
  <em>Darkie?</em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>Darkie?</em> </b>
</p><p><em> Yes? </em>Wilford was smiling.</p><p>“What are <em> you </em> doing here?” Abe asked. Dark was staring at Wilford in total confusion through the window in the door, but he shook his head.</p><p>“<b>Nothing that has to do with you,</b>” he replied. “<b>Now let me in.</b>”</p><p>“No,” Abe said.</p><p>“Of course!” Wilford pipped. Abe sighed, and then nodded to his friend. Dark was let inside. Charlotte was only able to fit her head in. Abe’s apartment doesn’t allow dogs, but nobody seemed to mind a dog the size of a school bus to come in, so it’s… fine?</p><p>“What do you want?” Abe asked. “You really want to mess with Wilford that bad?”</p><p>Dark didn’t give any response. Wilford was fiddling with the cuff of his sleeve.</p><p>“What do you want?” he repeated Abe’s question, and Dark looked at him calmly.</p><p>“<b>I’m just looking for something you found,</b>” he said. “<b>I hope you don’t mind?</b>”</p><p>Wilford opened his mouth, but Abe cupped it shut with his hand. “We do, actually. We don’t have what you’re looking for.”</p><p>“<b>I’m not sure I quite believe you,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>I found the spot on the wall empty, detective. You </b> <b> <em>must</em> </b> <b> have it here.</b>”</p><p>“Nope,” Abe said. “We don’t. Sorry.”</p><p>He was keeping Wilford behind him. He rolled his eyes, and put one of Abe’s arms down from guarding him. “We looked for it earlier, and we can’t seem to find it.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What? That doesn’t make any sense. </em>
</p><p><em> How does he lose it the </em> <b> <em>second time</em> </b> <em> he’s trying to find it? </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>Cut it out, you two.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Do you not remember where you left it?</b>” Dark asked. Wilford shrugged.</p><p>“See?” Abe asked, lightly shoving Dark to the door (in this case, Charlotte’s muzzle). “We have no idea where it went, and we can’t help you, so you and your bear can go now!”</p><p>Abe stopped in his tracks when he felt a strong grip on his shoulders, though Dark and Wilford’s hands weren't touching him.</p><p>“<b>I was talking to Wilford,</b>” Dark growled. <b> <em>That name is </em> </b> <b> <em>so</em> </b> <b> <em> weird…</em> </b></p><p>“Hey hey hey, let him go!” Wilford shouted. <em> My name is just fine, thank you very much. </em></p><p>Abe looked over his shoulder, but saw nothing. Wilford was running over to Abe to get him out of Dark’s ghost-grip, but Abe put a hand out to him. He took a deep breath, and looked back up at Dark. “Clearly, we don’t have what you want. Please leave.”</p><p>The being looked quite frustrated, but said nothing in reply. He turned on his heel, helping Charlotte pull her head out of the doorway. The grip around Abe’s shoulders loosened, but Dark shut the door behind him without leaving.</p><p>“<b>I’m not leaving until you give me what I asked for,</b>” he said.</p><p>“It’s not yours to ask for,” Abe replied, holding Wilford back again.</p><p>“<b>You really don’t know anything, do you.</b>” Dark asked softly.</p><p>“We’d like to!” Wilford raised a hand, smiling. “Well… Abe would, anyway. I could care less, but any way the wind blows.”</p><p>“Don’t speak for me!” Abe exclaimed.</p><p>“I can speak for you if I wanna, you big baby!” Wilford frowned. “You do it for me all the time and I don’t even agree with you!”</p><p>“You’re missing the point of all this, Wilford!” Abe gritted his teeth. “Leave this to me!”</p><p>Wilford looked offended. His bottom lip trembled, but he blew a raspberry, leaving the room. The other two watched him go in silence, and there was a loud slam of a door. Dark’s lips twitched quietly. “<b>I think you may have hurt his feelings.</b>”</p><p>“Thanks, Captain Obvious,” Abe said. “Still not helping you.”</p><p>“<b>I figured.</b>”</p><p>Abe sighed. <em> I probably should have been more careful with what I said. </em></p><p>“<b>Yeah,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>I think you should have.</b>”</p><p>Abe rolled his eyes.</p><p>“How do you know what I should and shouldn’t say to him?” he asked. “You don’t know anything about Wilford.”</p><p>“<b>No, you just choose to believe that I don’t.</b>”</p><p>“What’s that supposed to mean?” Abe asked. “I don’t choose to believe anything. I look for evidence and then I choose what to do with it.”</p><p>Claws were scratching on the other side of the door, with Charlotte growling. Dark had his hands behind his back.</p><p>“<b>Let me talk to him,</b>” he said. “<b>Just for a moment or two.</b>”</p><p>“How about no?” Abe crossed his arms.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I’m starting to see why you never liked to hang out with him. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Shush. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He’s quite stubborn. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> As were you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The scratching on the door intensified slightly, and Dark had a smile curl up on his face. “<b>If you don’t let me see Wilford, I’ll tell Charlotte to take you outside and play with you like a ragdoll.</b>”</p><p>Abe cringed at the image in his head. Charlotte continued scratching the door, whining curiously.</p><p>“<b>See?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>She’s already anticipating it.</b>”</p><p>Abe stared at Dark with his eyes narrowed. “You don’t play fair.”</p><p>“<b>When it comes to Will, I assure you, I will not,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>You can take Charlotte out for a walk if you </b> <b> <em>do</em> </b> <b> let me talk to him. She likes to go to the park.</b>”</p><p><em>Yeah, I’m sure a lot of people like it when she goes to the park too.</em> Abe pursed his lips.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Don’t be silly, it’s a private park.</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> The fuck is a private park? </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>Fuck you, that’s what.</em> </b>
</p><p>Abe blinked, and he was out in the hallway. He was cramped against the wall, with Charlotte’s fur almost choking him. “Ack- What-?! The fuck?!”</p><p>There was a sort of boom as Charlotte’s tail thumped against the floor. The detective sighed. “C’mon. Let’s… go for walkies.”</p><p>Rolling her eyes, Charlotte huffed out a gross-smelling sigh. She stood up with her head low against the ceiling of the apartment, only to struggle to turn the opposite way. She whined sadly. <b> <em>Parent-?</em> </b></p><p>Dark snapped in the other room, and the two were outside the apartment. Abe had a leash that was about the same width as a backpack strap, and it was hanging over his shoulder. “I- Uh- Okay?”</p><p>Charlotte was sitting down next to him, not moving. She looked down at Abe patiently.</p><p>“Alright, uh… time for a walk.” Abe started walking with a tight grip on the leash, but only to skid his feet on the tar. He looked over his shoulder to see Charlotte still not moving. Abe tugged on the leash to try to get her to move. She looked the other way, only for Abe to notice a small blue butterfly passing by her. Her ears perked with her tail wagging, and she stood up on all fours.</p><p>“Uh- Charlotte?” Abe called out. “Charlotte, we’re supposed to go to the park-”</p><p>The dog hopped a bit. Abe held his breath, tugging the leash again… and failed. “Charlotte, please?”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Nope.</em> </b>
</p><p>Another hop, and Abe was suddenly flying in the air. Apartment buildings were passing by very quickly, with bits of fur hitting Abe in the face.</p><p>“AAHHHHHHHH <em>SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT! </em>” VERY LOUD BARKING.</p><p>Awwww. Dogs are so sweet.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Nice Talk</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<b>Will? May I come in?</b>”</p><p>A soft cough, then a “Huh?”</p><p>Dark knocked on the door softly. “<b>I asked if I could come in… May I?</b>”</p><p>“Oh- oh, yeah, sure!” A lot of shuffling, along with a muffled “Ow!”</p><p>The door opened, and Wilford’s cheeks were red from being out of breath. Dark hid a smile.</p><p>The room was big, but… not big enough for Wilford, Dark immediately thought. Wilford had shoved some stuff under the bed really quick, and threw a blanket over a chair. He tossed himself on his bed, looking like he was trying to start some kind of conversation. “We’re uh… seeing each other a lot lately, huh?”</p><p>“<b>It seems so.</b>” Dark didn’t know if he should sit somewhere. “<b>Is that a bad thing?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I don’t like to think so. It’s Abe that I think is the bad part…”</p><p>“<b>How so?</b>” Dark asked. He already had the answer forming in his head, but he didn’t want to assume.</p><p>“He assumes too much,” Wilford said, looking down at his feet.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Well…</em> </b>
</p><p><em> Yeah. </em>Wilford opened his mouth. “He’s a good guy, really, but he’s stubborn. It takes a lot of shit to make him change his mind. I mean it literally, but… not quite.”</p><p>Dark hummed. “<b>So I should </b> <b> <em>not </em> </b> <b>be offended that he hates me, or…?</b>”</p><p>“I don’t think so,” Wilford replied. “He always thinks he’s right and everything just blows up in his face to prove him wrong. He doesn’t seem like he hates it, though. Just confused. Poor little duck.”</p><p>“<b>Honestly, I wouldn’t blame him,</b>” Dark replied, finally feeling comfortable to sit on the edge of Wilford’s chair. “<b>This whole case is a strange one to take on.</b>”</p><p>“It <em> is </em> strange,” Wilford agreed. “I hate to say it, because I <em> love </em> strange, but I <em> don’t like </em> this case at all. It’s just messing with everyone involved.”</p><p>Dark sensed an odd feeling from Wilford all of the sudden. More… old. More quiet. And a little bit of… nostalgia?</p><p>Wilford had his elbows on his legs, with his back kneeling. Both him and Dark were still. Wilford shook his head, chuckling quietly.</p><p>“Oh- Sheesh, I’m- I’m very sorry,” he said. “I’m not sure what’s going on with me lately.”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Hopefully nothing too bad.</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> Yeah, this doesn’t happen as often anymore. </em>
</p><p>Dark’s head tilted. Anymore?</p><p>“I mean, when I was younger…” Wilford sat up, voice obviously trying to sound more piper. “They felt like migraines, to put it lightly. Weird, <em> weird </em> migraines. I feel like me, but… not me?”</p><p>“<b>Deja vu,</b>” Dark said. “<b>That’s what you’re feeling.</b>”</p><p>After a second to take that in, Wilford nodded sagely. “If you say so.”</p><p>There was a hint of sadness in his tone.</p><p>“<b>You say that as if it’s a bad thing,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Think of it like… saying hello to the past. And the past saying hello back.</b>”</p><p>“I don’t like saying hello to it, though,” Wilford replied. “It makes me uncomfortable.”</p><p>“<b>Perhaps it just wants to be friends,</b>” Dark smiled. Wilford tried not to giggle.</p><p>“I don’t think so,” he said, hiding a grin. “But I like your way of putting it! Sounds better when you say it.”</p><p>“<b>Ha… maybe so.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I don’t feel the diamond anywhere. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He isn’t hiding it on purpose, that’s for certain. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“Why do you like talking to me?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>I find you quite charming,</b>” Dark answered truthfully. Wilford’s face reddened, and he raised a hand to his mouth to cover his smile.</p><p>“<b>Don’t take compliments easily?</b>” Dark asked. A tiny giggle.</p><p>“Not a whole lot, no,” Wilford said. “Everybody I know just kinda… observes what I do. I don’t think anything I do is very compliment-worthy anyway.”</p><p>“<b>What a shame,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Do you think Abe would like to know that?</b>”</p><p>Wilford snickered. “What is this, a therapy session?”</p><p>“<b>Probably.</b>”</p><p>“I’ve never been in one,” Wilford said, sitting back against the wall. “I like it so far.”</p><p>“<b>I’m glad you do,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>This was nice.</b>”</p><p>“<em>Was </em> nice?” Wilford asked. “We’re still here! We can keep going until our hearts are content!”</p><p>Dark chuckled softly. “<b>I like the offer, but I don’t think Abe would like it if I stayed here for too long.</b>”</p><p>Wilford blew a raspberry. “He’s too grumpy for his own good. I think he’s wrong about you.”</p><p>“<b>I </b> <b> <em>know </em> </b> <b>he’s wrong about me.</b>”</p><p>Wilford flipped himself upside down with his head hanging off the edge of his bed.</p><p>“What could <em> I </em> be <em> right </em> about you then?” he asked. “Just to prove some points to Mr. Dick-tective.”</p><p>“<b>Well, what is your opinion on me?</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s legs toppled over his head, and he swiftly flipped himself over to stand up on the floor. He turned over to face Dark again and hopped back on his bed. What a weird way to turn yourself back around to face somebody.</p><p>Wilford was looking at Dark from head to toe, humming to himself. After a ponder, he snaps a finger, pointing at Dark. “I like you!”</p><p>There was a small smile as Dark sat back in his chair. “<b>I like you too, Will.</b>”</p><p>Wilford waved a hand. “Awww, thank you. But honestly, I like you enough that I wanna prove Abe wrong that you’re… whatever he sees in you.”</p><p>“<b>It’s funny,</b>” Dark said. “<b>He says he’s gotten enough research to know he shouldn’t ‘trust’ me, but he doesn’t show me any evidence to deem so. Kind of ironic, if you ask me.</b>”</p><p>Wilford blew a sigh through his lips. “Well… what can I do?”</p><p>“<b>Wear him down, if you like. Perhaps… perhaps I could visit every once in a while?</b>”</p><p>The grin Wilford gave him was the only answer he needed. Dark smiled back, looking out Wilford’s window. “<b>I should leave.</b>”</p><p>“Aww…”</p><p>“<b>Well, I can tell Abe is coming back,</b>” Dark said. “<b>He’s a bit… frazzled. Let it be known that </b> <b> <em>Charlotte</em> </b> <b> is the one that does all the walking.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s bottom lip pout immediately went away, and he was snickering. “What a good girl!”</p><p>“<b>She is. I think she’s tired your boyfriend out good and proper.</b>”</p><p>“Boyfriend?”</p><p>Dark looked surprised. “<b>You two aren’t together?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged, seemingly unsure. “Yeah? No? Kind of?”</p><p>“<b>I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed,</b>” Dark’s face was a more somber shade of gray.</p><p>“No, no, I can… I can see why you’d think that.” Nevertheless, Wilford’s face was a very lovely shade of pink.</p><p>From the outside of Wilford’s room, a door slammed open against a wall. Pretty sure there was a small crack following along with it.</p><p>“<b>I can pay for that,</b>” Dark said. Wilford waved a hand again.</p><p>“No, it’s fine,” he replied. “The person who owned this apartment went on vacation a <em> long </em> time ago, I’m pretty sure they don’t care about property damage anymore.”</p><p>“<b>I… see.</b>” Dark was looking down, almost ashamedly. He stood up. “<b>I should probably go.</b>”</p><p>“Why?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>I don’t want to overstay my welcome.</b>”</p><p>Another pout before Wilford nodded. “At least I get to see you again!”</p><p>Dark smiled again. “<b>That is very true. I must take my leave now.</b>”</p><p>“Want me to see you out the door?” Wilford offered, springing up off the bed. Dark nodded, standing up as well. Escorting his new friend to the door, Wilford had just enough time to open it before they heard a booming, happy bark outside.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Parent! We went for a walk! It was fun!</em> </b>
</p><p>Chuckling, Dark stepped out the door to greet his dog. “<b>Oh, hello, sweetheart. Did you have a good time?</b>”</p><p>Dark’s answer was a lick to the face. “<b>I’ll take that as a yes. Now, would you mind putting the nice detective down, Charlotte?</b>”</p><p>Peeking over Dark’s shoulder, Wilford noticed that Abe was clinging fast to Charlotte’s tail. The dog huffed, but slowly lowered her tail. Abe was set carefully on the floor. He was very stiff, with this almost traumatic look on his face. Wilford was covering his mouth with his hands.</p><p>“You okay there, Abe?” he snickered.</p><p>Abe was scowling. “Don’t. Say. Anything.”</p><p>Wilford snorted. “What, you didn’t wike tha wawlk wif da widdle poochie?”</p><p>Both Dark and Abe pulled a face, but Dark looked like he was trying not to laugh.</p><p>“... Yeah,” Abe said. “Don’t ever do that again.”</p><p>“Okay, Mom,” Wilford agreed cheerily. Abe ignored him, trudging inside the apartment to flop onto the couch…</p><p>“Goddammit, there’s so much fur…” after going to the bathroom. Wilford and Dark were giggling.</p><p>“<b>Good girl, Charlotte,</b>” Dark said, reaching up to rub his dog’s chest, only to get a toupee of fur all over his hand. “<b>Thank you for reminding me you need a shed-job once we get home.</b>”</p><p>Happy dog pants. “<b>Well, we should be going.</b>”</p><p>“So soon?” Wilford asked, head tilting.</p><p>“<b>Abe looks like he could use a nap,</b>” Dark pointed out, with a smile. Charlotte hoisted him up off the ground, setting him on her back. “<b>Bye, Will.</b>”</p><p>Wilford waved up at him, and they were off.</p><p>There was vomiting, and Wilford sighed, wandering off to get the cleaning supplies.</p><p>“Who’s the sick one <em> now? </em>”</p><p>“Just shut up and help get my damn clothes in the washer!” Abe groaned.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>“The person who owned this apartment went on vacation a long time ago, I’m pretty sure they don’t care about property damage anymore.” - In this case, they ded. I like to imagine since "murderer" is apprently Wilford's trigger word (i think???), Abe replaces it with "going on vacation", sorta like how Sans does it with Papyrus in the genocide route in Undertale if you don't kill Pap. :D</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. I Don’t Know Why</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You should get some rest.”</p><p>“No. I wanna work.”</p><p>Wilford’s hands were on his hips- he’d just gotten Abe some clean clothes, and the detective was now trying to get into his office. “<em>Abe! </em>”</p><p>“Wilford. Come on, bud, I got emails to send.”</p><p>“You can do it later,” Wilford said, grabbing Abe’s arm. “I wanna watch <em> Frankenweenie.</em>”</p><p>“But <em> Wilford</em><em>-</em>”</p><p>“You prooooooomised!” He was tugging on the arm now, making a little pouty face.</p><p>“I’ll do it later!” Abe exclaimed.</p><p>Wilford’s grip tightened. “... Please, Abe? <em> Pour moi? </em>”</p><p>“Not right now, man,” Abe rolled his eyes, holding onto his doorknob. “You know this investigation is important-”</p><p>“And I know you don’t know how to take care of yourself!” Wilford interrupted. He suddenly picked Abe up. “We are gonna watch a bunch of dumb shit! And eat candy! And then, maybe fall asleep on the couch! And you are gonna relax and have a good time! And you’re gonna like it!”</p><p>He ran off to the living room, with Abe up in the air in Wilford’s hands, sputtering out protests.</p><p>Wilford plopped Abe down on the couch, and crawled down to the shelf underneath the TV. He pulled out a pile of DVDs from the very back, with a piece of paper taped onto the top, labeled “So bad it’s brilliant”.</p><p>“I’m gonna save Frankenweenie for another time,” Wilford said. “Gonna do that one when we’re in our best moods… We’ve goooooooottttt…”</p><p>Birdemic, Troll 2, Batman &amp; Robin, Con Air, The Wicker Man, Hobgoblins, the IT Miniseries, Masters of the Universe, and…</p><p>Oh, <em> God.</em></p><p>The Room.</p><p>Wilford grinned, grabbing The Room and practically throwing it into the DVD player. Then, making it clear he expected Abe to “park that butt on the couch right now, mister,” he ran into the kitchen, coming back a few minutes later with a bowl that was about the same size as his lap, full of popcorn.</p><p>After various different shots of San Francisco, Abe asked, “The hell is this?”</p><p>“The Room! It’s stupid! You’ll really love it!”</p><p>Abe was staring at the screen, seeing the beginning credits go by.</p><p>“Written by Tommy Wiseau”</p><p>“Produced by Tommy Wiseau”</p><p>“Directed by Tommy Wiseau”</p><p>“This film must really like Tommy Wiseau,” Abe said.</p><p>Wilford snickered. “You don’t even know half of it.”</p><p>A shot of an apartment. “Starring Tommy Wiseau”</p><p>“<em>WHAT?! </em>” Abe spat, making Wilford howl laughing.</p><p>The film already had this odd feeling to it, and Abe had no idea what to think of it. Then it got to Tommy Wiseau as the main character, Johnny, greeting his fiancee.</p><p>Then it got to Tommy Wiseau’s acting.</p><p>Oh, <em> god, the acting. </em></p><p>Abe cringed, practically sinking into the couch while gripping onto his knees. Wilford was grinning wide. </p><p>Wilford had him hook, line, and sinker.</p><p>This whole film felt <em> so </em> uncomfortable, but in an ironically hilarious way. The two friends had to rewind a few parts to wonder what the hell was going on, with Abe loudly questioning how old a specific character was.</p><p>Abe giggled, on occasion- he straight up burst into laughter at one point, where Johnny was in a store and greeting a dog. There was nothing inherently funny about it, but for some reason, that scene was what set him off.</p><p>They were having a very good time. It was really fun.</p><p>“... We could watch IT next,” Wilford suggested. Abe waved a hand while chewing on a popcorn kernel.</p><p>“Lisa <em> just </em> asked if Johnny was dead after he shot himself in the mouth, we <em> gotta </em> find out what happens,” he said.</p><p>“If you insist!” Wilford snickered.</p><p>“Wait, no, Denny, doN’T COME IN! DENNY, <em> NO! </em>”</p><p>Wilford cackled.</p><p>The movie ended a little bit later. Wilford and Abe watched the credits go by in silence. Abe had a <em> lot </em> of things to say, but it was all so much. His mouth was agape, and Wilford was smirking. “You like it?”</p><p>“You know,” Abe replied slowly. “In all the best ways, I hate it. That was <em> terrible.</em>”</p><p>“Awww, I’m glad you enjoyed it!”</p><p>They smiled at each other, trying not to snicker.</p><p>“‘Hi, doggie,’” Abe replied in a goofy voice.</p><p>“‘Hi, Johnny,’” Wilford teased quietly. “‘You’re my favorite customer!’”</p><p>Abe laughed. “‘You’re just a little chicken- CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP CHEEEEEEEEEEEP!’”</p><p>Wilford started giggling so hard that he had to wipe at his eyes, tears springing in them. He hadn’t expected Abe to say that at all.</p><p>“I think we should let this one sit for a while,” Wilford said after his giggle fit. “I <em> really </em> wanna watch Birdemic later, though!”</p><p>“Pretty sure I saw a preview of it before,” Abe replied, voice tired after his Tommy Wiseau impression. “Looks dumb.”</p><p>“That’s the <em> point! </em> This is my horrible movie bin!” Wilford chirped.</p><p>“What do you think the people who made these movies feel after their whole reception?” Abe asked. “I bet the Tommy guy must be super surprised about the hate-love this gets.”</p><p>“It’s better to be remembered for being horrible- or good- then being forgotten because of mediocrity,” was a sage reply from Wilford. “I’ll bet you that the Tommy guy’s touched a few people care about his film in the first place, yeah?”</p><p>Abe sat back. “Probably. I mean… the guy <em> has </em> to be aware that his acting is terrible, right?”</p><p>Wilford nodded. “Oh, absolutely! But that doesn’t matter, you can tell he was having fun!”</p><p>Wilford was smiling throughout that whole sentence. It wasn’t as surprising as it was to Abe over how much Wilford loved talking about films. Maybe he could do something related to it if he loves it so much. Not a full-length movie, but maybe a simple TV show.</p><p>… It was kind of cute, seeing Wilford so passionate and happy about something. Abe doesn’t see him like this so often, maybe because he bosses him around so much. Maybe a little <em> too </em> much.</p><p>Maybe that was why Wilford was being so stubborn about this case.</p><p>Abe knew Wilford would act all grumpy and uninterested during cases, not just for the diamond that they both <em> still </em> have to find. There was a murder case just a few weeks ago, but Abe would replace the word with “escapism” or “went on vacation” so he wouldn’t trigger Wilford in any way. It was the last thing he wanted. During the entire case, Wilford was slacking off in all the wrong places, even pulling out ice cream out of a fridge, yelling crude things to Abe about how the entire house during the case is the crime scene.</p><p>It was clear that Wilford found detectiving very, <em> very </em> boring… It made Abe wonder why Wilford tagged along in the first place. Probably just to roam around without getting in trouble by any other cop that isn’t Abe.</p><p>Abe could only cross his fingers and hope there would be a film that both he and Wilford could enjoy that has the things they both are passionate about. A film that is a mystery, but it’s a terrible film about a mystery. So many plot holes! Horrible acting! Baffling line deliveries, preferably towards animals! Strange accents you can’t really blame the actors for because they were born with it but you make fun of it anyway!</p><p>It would be the perfect. Bad. Film.</p><p>Wilford yawned next to him. “Are we brave enough to look at Birdemic? Or do you wanna watch Masters of the Universe?”</p><p>“Not at all,” Abe said, yawning seconds after. “‘S pretty late. Are you sure you wanna watch another movie? You look like you need some sleep.”</p><p>“So?” Wilford asked. There was a sense of tired droopiness in his voice. “We don’t need to sleep. The world is our oyster, we can do whatever we want right now. And <em> I </em> don’t want to sleep.”</p><p>“Well, <em> I </em>want you to get some sleep, okay?” Abe asked softly, rubbing Wilford’s shoulder. Wilford brushed Abe’s hand off.</p><p>“We are in such a pickle!” he exclaimed, somewhat teasingly. “We could argue about this <em> aaaalllllll </em> night, going off in circles about whether or not-”</p><p>Almost on impulse, Abe leaned forward and kissed him. “<em>-mph!! </em>” </p><p>Oh. Shit.</p><p>Shitshitshit<em> shit.</em></p><p>Abe blinked, shoving Wilford away, only to tug on his collar.</p><p>Wilford’s eyes were very wide, and he’d gone very pale, though color was quickly filling in his cheeks.</p><p>Abe tried not to look at him.</p><p>“I- you- it- I didn’t… I… ” He was a stuttering mess. “I- I’m sorry, I- I didn’t mean-”</p><p>Wilford grabbed Abe’s collar and kissed him back, more deeply than the other.</p><p>Oh, jeez…</p><p>Oh, jeez, oh, jeez, oh jeez, oh jeez, oh jeez- oh… <em> shit… </em></p><p>Abe pulled back again, struggling to stand up. “Sorry- I just-”</p><p>Wilford reached out gently. “Hey, it’s okay-”</p><p>“No, it isn’t.” Abe’s fingers were shaking, and he walked around the couch. “I’m gonna… I’m gonna go to bed. Good… goodnight, Wilford.”</p><p>Wilford almost tripped on a blanket to get up to his feet. “Wait- Abe! It’s alright!”</p><p>There was already a slam of a door in Abe’s office.</p><p>Wilford slowly sat back down on the couch, tears in his eyes somehow. He rubbed at them under his glasses harshly, his cheeks beginning to burn. He remembered what Dark asked him earlier.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <b>
    <em>You two aren’t together?</em>
  </b>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>… God <em> fucking </em>damn it.</p><p>It must have seemed <em> so </em> obvious to Dark to make him ask that.</p><p>Wilford stayed on the couch for the rest of the night until he fell asleep.</p><p>Abe was sitting in front of his desk, mumbling a bunch of nonsense to himself.</p><p>
  <em> Stupid, stupid, stupid… </em>
</p><p>He felt so <em> stupid. </em> How could he act so <em> carelessly </em> while doing that?! Wilford was in the middle of talking, and Abe had the audacity to just… <em> you know! </em></p><p>
  <em> Stupid, stupid, stupid… </em>
</p><p>Abe bumped his forehead against the desk, gritting his teeth.</p><p><em> Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, </em> <b> <em>stupid</em></b><strong><em>, </em></strong> Abe lifted his head up, clenching a fist. “Why did you <em> do </em> that, you <em> fucking IDIOT!?! </em>”</p><p>Abe swiped his fist at a mug, and there was a loud glassy smash. Pens, markers, and broken pieces of mug were all over the floor, but Abe didn’t bother to clean it all up.</p><p>There was a tiny scar on Abe’s knuckle, but he didn’t bother to bandage it.</p><p>Answering emails couldn’t distract Abe at all. Thoughts and feelings were fuelling up in his head like mad.</p><p><em> Why did I do that? Wilford was talking and I just </em> <b> <em>kissed</em> </b> <em> him out of nowhere? What the hell am I supposed to do after that? Should I not talk to Wilford anymore? Should I kick him out? What made me want to kiss him in the first place? I get it, he’s cute, but… he’s a murderer. </em></p><p>Abe sighed. “Dammit.”</p><p>Wilford hasn’t killed anybody lately, honestly. But there is always a possibility he’ll do it when it’s least expected anyway…</p><p>Wilford must have been so confused. He probably doesn’t view Abe that way at all.</p><p>Abe then wiped his eyes, no, not because of tears… they were stinging… And before he knew it, Abe fell asleep with his face pressed on the desk.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. But I Do</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford and Abe woke up at the same time, which was a rarity for both of them. The moment the two saw each other once Abe came in through the living room, Abe quickly headed to the kitchen, with Wilford saying nothing. There was soon the clashing of pots and pans, and Wilford wasn’t entirely sure if he was trying to make breakfast, or just wash the dishes.</p><p>He sat still for a moment, and then, out of nowhere, he stood up, eyes wide.</p><p>He knew how to fix this.</p><p>A few minutes later, Abe heard a soft opening number coming from the living room.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I don’t know why I love you, but I do. </em></p><p>
  <em> I don’t know why I cry so, but I do. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I only know I’m lonely, and that I want you only, </em>
</p><p><em> I don’t know why I love you, but I do! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford poked his head into the kitchen, expecting a reaction. Abe rolled his eyes, grabbing a clean mug from the counter. Wilford slowly snapped a finger to the beat of the song, just because it’s catchy, and also because he wanted Abe’s attention. Abe looked at him for a bit, but turned back to the counter to make coffee. Pouting, Wilford kind of shuffled next to him, getting no reaction.</p><p>Wilford’s eyes twinkled with mischief, and when Abe glanced at him again, he held out a hand. <em> Please? </em></p><p>Abe hesitated.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I can’t sleep nights, because I feel so restless. </em></p><p>
  <em> I don’t know what to do, I feel so helpless. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> And since you went away, I cry both night and day, </em>
</p><p><em> I don’t know why I love you, but I do! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Abe slowly set the mug down.</p><p>He took Wilford’s hand, and they walked into the living room. The music was coming from an old record player on the coffee table.</p><p><em> I’m gonna have to add this song to a new playlist, </em> Wilford thought. That prompted a little smile from Abe, but he didn’t say anything.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>My days have been so lonely, </em></p><p>
  <em> My nights have been so blue, </em>
</p><p><em> I don’t know why I stand it, but I do. </em>”</p><p> </p><p>The two weren’t exactly dancing, but they did hold each others’ hands and shimmied around from side to side… if that even counts as dancing. It was a very upbeat classy song, but not worthy of a slow-dance.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Each night, I sit alone and tell myself, </em></p><p>
  <em> That I will fall in love with someone else. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I guess I’m wastin’ my time, but I’ve got to clear my mind, </em>
</p><p><em> I don’t know why I love you, but I do! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford wanted Abe to say something, but it was understandable if he didn’t want to talk. </p><p>After a few minutes, the song ended. Abe let go of Wilford to start it over again.</p><p><em> I just like it, </em> Abe thought, and Wilford smiled widely.</p><p>They danced again, and this time it was a bit more like actual dancing. Kind of more swing-era than the song intended, but whatever.  </p><p>Eventually, Wilford gained confidence to <em> try </em> and say something. <em> Are you mad? </em></p><p>The detective stopped for a moment, which caused Wilford to accidentally bump into him with a giggle. “What…? No, no. I’m not mad. Not at you, anyway.”</p><p>Wilford nodded a bit. <em> Okay… Better not be at yourself. </em></p><p>“Are you kidding?” Abe asked. “Of course I am!”</p><p>“Why, though?” Wilford asked out loud, spinning under Abe’s raised arms. “There shouldn’t be any reason to!”</p><p>Abe pursed his lips, looking down. “To put it lightly, I guess… just some internalized shit. I’m working on it, though.”</p><p>Wilford frowned. “Well, that’s not very good. You shouldn’t keep something inside if it’s bothering you so much.”</p><p><em> I just said I’m working on it, </em> Abe thought.</p><p>There was a quiet sigh.</p><p>“I was just… born at the wrong time, I guess,” Abe said out loud.</p><p>Wilford paused his movement as the song kept playing. “Abe. You <em> know </em>I’ve never been the straightest straw in the bunch, either.”</p><p>“It <em> was </em> a little obvious, huh?” Abe asked. “I guess I used my job to help me come up with excuses or to try to hide it.”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I mean… sticking a finger up a guy’s ass <em> does </em> seem a bit… obvious.”</p><p>“Don’t tell anyone I did it,” Abe said, trying to hide a chuckle. “It <em> is </em> the correct way to measure the temperature of the body, though.”</p><p>Wilford snorted. “Yeah, and you were <em> so eager </em>to do it again in Moonlight Rollerway.”</p><p>Abe snickered.</p><p>“I didn’t put the two together then. I’m sorry.” Wilford was giggling though, his shoulders shaking with pure mirth.</p><p>Abe had a small smirk on his face. “Yeah… it <em> was </em> pretty fuckin’ obvious.”</p><p>“Don’t <em> say </em>that like it’s a bad thing!” Wilford said. “You’re lucky you don’t get to be dead over it! Cuz it’s just uncalled for when some people do that.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Abe’s voice was going quiet. “It sucks sometimes, but at least more and more people are getting more aware.”</p><p>Wilford patted Abe’s chest. “That’s why it’s not a bad thing. I’m <em> super </em> happy for you! You could have said something about it even though I already kinda knew!”</p><p>The detective shrugged. “I don’t know why I did it in the first place, it just sort of <em> happened.</em>”</p><p>“I didn’t <em> mind…</em>” Wilford admitted quietly. “I didn’t expect it, but… it was a nice way for you to tell me.”</p><p>“Yeah, sure.” Somehow, it didn’t come off as sarcastic. Abe was blushing a little bit. “Pretty sure my parents knew before they d- went on vacation, but they didn’t say anything about it.”</p><p>“Is that a bad thing?” Wilford asked.</p><p>Abe shrugged again. “I don’t think so. They both just told me they loved me no matter what, and that was it. I think a few partners knew before they left, too… they kept it between us, though. Most of them were guys, anyway. Some of them were pretty nice about it. Most weren’t.”</p><p>Wilford frowned, and he was quiet for a moment. “They’re on vacation, right? All of your partners?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Abe replied. Wilford nodded. “Good.”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Because. If they weren’t… I’d hunt down all the ones that were mean to you and make them apologize at gunpoint.” His expression was a serious one. “They’re the kind of people that can’t accept you’re different from them. And it’s awful.”</p><p>“That’s… nice,” Abe stuttered, his face heating up a little bit. “That you’d stand up for me that way. Just… don’t-”</p><p>Wilford waved a hand. “Don’t pull the trigger, yeah yeah, I know. They’re still awful, though.”</p><p>“I guess so.” Abe scratched the back of his neck. “I mean, the ones who couldn’t get it, they were still nice people, they just… didn’t really get me, you know?”</p><p>“Of course,” Wilford had a small smile on his face. “I kinda remember one day, once I thought I’d like a bunch of different kinds of people, and it turns out I did. I still do, and it’s great! I think you’re not liking you because you’re not embracing… <em> you.</em>”</p><p>Wilford paused because he realized he used “you” too much in one sentence. Good thing he kept going, though. He shrugged a little bit. “You get what I mean?”</p><p>“I do,” Abe said. “I’ve been trying a while ago, but I guess I just forgot about it for a while… Maybe I can try again soon, though.”</p><p>Wilford’s smile grew. “Good! I’m so proud of you, duck!”</p><p>The detective’s blush grew twice as much. “Thanks, bud.”</p><p>“Not a problem.”</p><p>Wilford wrapped his arms around Abe and hugged him tightly. Abe hesitated for a second before hugging him back. Both of them were smiling widely, as the song on the record player ended for the fifth time in a row.</p><p>Don’t ask how.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Song is I Don't Know Why (But I Do) by Clarence "Frogman" Henry! Listen to it when you can, it's a really sweet song. :D</p><p>Anyway, Abe is perfect unintentional metaphor for internalized homophobia representation, pass it on- https://crankgayplays.tumblr.com/post/189220292798/go-on-im-listening-thank-god-someone-aisde-from</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Protective Detective Returns</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I don’t see why you have to go.”</p><p>They were in the middle of breakfast. Wilford paused in the middle of dissecting his pancake, wiping the crumbs out of his mustache before mumbling, “I jus’ think they’re lonely… you don’t have to come with me, if you don’t wanna.”</p><p>“Yeah… I think I’m gonna pass, buddy.” Abe’s fork was dragging around on the plate.</p><p>“Alrighty then,” Wilford grinned. “I can bring back a leaf as a present or something when I come back!”</p><p>“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Wilford,” Abe said.</p><p>Wilford swallowed. “I’m not! It’s the food’s fault for staying in there when it’s supposed to go down my gullet!”</p><p>That caused a soft chuckle, before Abe looked serious. “Just… be careful, okay?”</p><p>“Of course I will,” Wilford replied. “How bad can it be?”</p><p>Abe pursed his lips while jabbing his fork in his pancake. “Well… remember the woods?”</p><p>Wilford nodded, lifting a piece of pancake, trying to keep it away from his mustache as he opened his mouth. “What about it?”</p><p>“Remember how they make you want to hurl?” Abe pointed out. “And I had to carry you in and out of them because they made you feel like garbo?”</p><p>“I was okay after, though,” Wilford replied, mouth full again. “It sucked to go through those woods, but it’s the only way I can visit Dark! I promised I’d see them after a while.”</p><p>Abe decided not to reply to that.</p><p>“What’s so bad about it?” Wilford asked. “It’s not like I’m gonna die once I go today.”</p><p>“Well, now you just put the thought in my head that you might,” Abe snapped, clenching onto his fork.</p><p>“Abe, you know as well as I do that I’ll be fine,” Wilford said, leaning over to take his hand. “Who knows? Maybe I’ll get used to it.”</p><p>“I <em> really </em> don’t want you going into those woods,” Abe said. “We still have no idea what’s in there to make you look and feel like shit. And I <em> especially </em> don’t like the thought of you seeing Dark, either.”</p><p>“What?” Wilford blinked, almost choking a pancake before he swallowed it down. After he composed himself with a tiny cough, he asked loudly, “Why?!”</p><p>“Just… because.”</p><p>His friend stared at him before grinning wide. “Abe… are you <em> jealous </em> I have a new friend?”</p><p>“Wh- what?!? <em> No, </em>I-”</p><p>Wilford leaned in more, with his legs pushing the chair back. “Sounds like you’re <em> very </em> upset that I have a new buddy!”</p><p>Abe’s face was flushed, knowing that at least <em> half </em> of that was true. “No, I’m not-”</p><p>“Oh, yes, you are~”</p><p>“Well, sorry that I have the emotional capability to worry about you! I’ll <em> refrain </em>from it in the future,” Abe muttered, stabbing at his own pancake viciously.</p><p>Wilford rubbed his chin almost skeptically. “That sophisticated sentence makes me think you won’t, duck. You’re jealous!”</p><p>“You’re not <em> funny, </em> Bubbles.”</p><p>Bubbles? <em> Bubbles?! </em></p><p>Wilford held in a snort, trying to brush it off. It had been a <em> very </em>long time since Abe had dared to mutter that particular nickname. Years and years. “You’re upset that I have a new friend, admit it!”</p><p>“Okay, yeah, I am,” Abe spat out quickly. “But the <em> other </em> reason is that I <em> REALLY </em> don’t want you going in those woods to <em> see </em> your new friend.”</p><p>“I’ll be careful, duck,” Wilford promised, his voice surprisingly soft. He reached out and took Abe’s hand again, and this time, the detective squeezed it. Neither let go.</p><p>“You know I don’t trust them, right?” he asked. “I just don’t want you to be turned over your head… again.”</p><p>Wilford didn’t hear the last word. “I know. But I know you trust me, right?”</p><p>Abe nodded, and Wilford smiled. “Then I know that you’ll trust that I’ll be okay. Something just makes me feel like I have to go. That it’s important, somehow. I wanna see Dark for more reasons than I thought, I suppose!”</p><p>Abe looked down at his plate. “Well. I wanna say ‘be careful’, but you already know I do that on a daily basis. You know what to do if you’re ever in trouble, call me. I’ll be there.”</p><p>“Yep!” Wilford’s chipper attitude came back almost immediately.</p><p>“And finish your pancakes,” Abe added. “I don’t wanna have to finish two plates all by myself.”</p><p>Wilford stuck his tongue out, but ate the rest of them quickly, somehow not getting syrup all over his face. Good job, Wilford! That’s definitely not gonna sit well later. Oh, well. At least he finished.</p><p>As soon as Wilford threw the plate in the sink, he grabbed his sweater and shuffled his shoes on.</p><p>“Jeez, it’s not like the ice cream truck is going by,” Abe said. “It’s been like, what, a day since you saw Dark?”</p><p>“Yep!” Wilford exclaimed, fiddling with strings on the torn up part on the back of his sweater, where his hood was once on. “I’m just excited, that’s all!”</p><p>Yeah, Abe could tell. He pulled a face at what Wilford added, but didn’t say anything. It was then when Abe noticed a small scar across Wilford’s neck before he opened the door.</p><p>“I’ll be back soon!” Wilford said.</p><p>Abe waved. “Yeah… see you later.”</p><p>“Later~!” A slam of the door, and Abe peeked through the window to watch Wilford go. Just to be sure.</p><p>Once Wilford was out of his sight, Abe went over to the living room to the record player.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I don’t know why I love you, but I do. </em></p><p>
  <em> I don’t know why I cry so, but I do. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I only know I’m lonely, and that I want you only, </em>
</p><p><em> I don’t know why I love you, but I do! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>He sighed, but he didn’t turn the song off.</p><p>“You moron.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Gotta Be Brave</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The forest was a lot colder than he remembered. Less colorful, too. Fog was everywhere, all over the ground, mostly. The whole environment of these woods looks completely different from outside of the stone fence, like Wilford just traveled to a different country.</p><p>Boo.</p><p>Wilford hugged himself for a moment, wishing he could just use his powers to get through it. He thought of doing it before, but nothing really happened. Must be for plot-convenient reasons.</p><p>Didn’t mean he had to like it.</p><p>Wilford was walking in the forest, very slowly, almost cautiously. His stomach was already growling, and he groaned. He <em> just </em> ate! Pancakes are meant to stay down!</p><p>Wilford held onto his stomach with a hand. He took a deep breath, and then held it, walking faster.</p><p>Eventually, the usual sick feeling he would get in his stomach when he’s in these woods went away almost completely. Wilford didn’t really notice it until he spotted the cabin.</p><p><em> Whoa! </em> Wilford blinked. “I made it!”</p><p>Barking was suddenly heard from inside the cabin. Looks like Charlotte heard him. Wilford smiled, getting excited again. “I’mma comin!”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Pink funny man!</em> </b>
</p><p>Charlotte was going absolutely crazy in there. The door busted open, and she sprinted out into the field, barking like mad. Wilford wanted to stop in his tracks, but he knew the dog wouldn’t hurt him, so he started running as well. She practically crashed into him, tossing him up into the air and barking happily. Wilford landed on her back.</p><p>Pretty sure one of his rib bones cracked. Eh.</p><p>Wilford sat up, gripping on Charlotte’s fur. “Hi!”</p><p>Charlotte was hopping around in circles, barking excitedly. Wilford was almost getting dizzy, but he held on tight anyway, even when he was slipping from her back to her side.</p><p>He got a lick to the face at that.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Parent and I missed you!</em> </b>
</p><p>“Awwwwe, I missed you too, girl!”</p><p>Charlotte had this smile on her face that wouldn’t go away. She trotted over to the cabin, and Wilford fell on the ground, laughing hysterically. Dark peered out the opened cabin door, and she was met with the sight of Wilford, sitting at Charlotte’s feet. Her dog beamed with pride.</p><p>Dark blinked.</p><p>“<b>And I thought she just needed to use the bathroom,</b>” she said, with a smile. “<b>Hello, again. I didn’t expect you to come so soon.</b>”</p><p>Wilford sat up straight with his legs crossed. “Hello again!”</p><p>“<b>Did you come here all by yourself?</b>” Dark asked. Her voice was so sweet.</p><p>Wilford nodded. “Yup! I didn’t get sick through the woods this time.”</p><p>“<b>That’s wonderful-!</b>” Dark paused after the sudden happy tone. “<b>That’s… wonderful. I noticed you look very nice today.</b>”</p><p>“Really?” Wilford asked, brushing dirt off his legs and his sweater. “I didn’t notice! You look great today too!”</p><p>The being chuckled. “<b>Are you sure?</b>”</p><p>“Yes. Very pretty!”</p><p>“<b><em>Really? </em> </b> ” Dark asked. “<b>I didn’t notice.</b>”</p><p>Did she just steal Wilford’s line-? Oh well. All three were very happy to see each other.</p><p>“<b>Would… you like to come in?</b>”</p><p>“Oh- yes, please!”</p><p>“<b>Mind you, I </b> <b> <em>am </em> </b> <b>doing some redecorating-</b>”</p><p>Wilford tossed a hand. “I’m sure your home looks great, too.”</p><p>Dark let out a cute little giggle, and Wilford blushed. Oh, brother. Wilford wandered inside, and then gasped. “Woah! It’s amazing!”</p><p>All she did was dust and put some paintings on the wall… opened a curtain or two… even the fireplace was lit, though Wilford couldn’t see any wood. Must be a metaphor.</p><p>“<b>I didn’t do a whole lot, really…</b>” Dark said.</p><p>“Shush! I love it! It’s so <em> cozy! </em>” There was a small pause. “Did you do all this ‘cause I was visiting?”</p><p>“<b>In all honesty, I had no idea you were coming,</b>” Dark replied, itching her neck. “<strong>I</strong><b>t’s just been a while since I cleaned anything.</b>”</p><p>Wilford had already sat down, Charlotte lying behind him. “I think it’s nice! What are the paintings for?”</p><p>Dark looked out to the paintings hung on the walls. Some of the more solid-looking ones were paintings of the woods, of the foregrounds of a manor. Things that were defined, that could almost be reached out and touched. Landscapes. </p><p>The more abstract ones, though, these seemed fueled by feelings more than anything- a wall of ice. A broken mirror. An axe on a crimson backdrop. A tidal wave.</p><p>“<b>They were made to sort out my memories,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted. “Oh? Are you having trouble remembering something? I have trouble with my memories all the time, too.”</p><p>Dark chuckled lightly.</p><p>“<b>No, no, no, it’s more like… an attempt to put those memories into perspective,</b>” she said quietly. “<b>I can’t exactly tell you what they are, but… you can make up your own interpretation of them, if you’d like.</b>”</p><p>Wilford was fiddling with the cuffs of his sleeves. “Oh, okay. Well… if you made them, you’re a really good painter.”</p><p>Dark nodded, her gaze fixed on the painting of the mirror again. “<b>I’ve had a very, </b> <b> <em>very </em> </b> <b>long time to practice.</b>”</p><p>“Since a month ago?” Wilford asked.</p><p>Dark looked back at him, confused. “<b>Why do you ask that?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “It’s been a month since, I guess the internet, has ever seen you. I kinda assumed you existed for a month!”</p><p>Dark snorted. “<b>Ha. No. I am </b> <b> <em>much </em> </b> <b>older than that… not as old as you or Abe, mind you, but still. Quite old.</b>”</p><p>“What? How? I’ve had to change my name like, 90 times, and you’re just <em> now </em> on the internet?” There was clear intrigue.</p><p>“<b>Well, not everyone gets around like you do, </b> <b> <em>Wingleheimer,</em></b>” Dark said, almost grinning.</p><p>Wilford sighed. “That was <em> one time! </em>”</p><p>He could vaguely hear Dark laughing.</p><p> </p><p><em> Aw, look at that. You </em> <b> <em>amuse</em> </b> <em> her. How… </em> <b> <em>sweet</em> </b> <em> . </em></p><p> </p><p>Wilford gave a start of surprise, and the laughing stopped. Dark was frozen, with this smile fading off of her face. Wilford sat still, a bit lost.</p><p>“I didn’t just hear that, right?” he asked. “Who was that?”</p><p>“<b>I- That was, uh… someone,</b>” Dark replied, slowly. “<b>Can’t really… tell who, though. It was very faint…</b>”</p><p> </p><p><em> Now? Of </em> <b> <em>all</em> </b> <em> times he could have been heard, he chooses </em> <b> <em>now?!</em> </b></p><p><em> Calm </em> <b> <em>down-</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>There was a loud ringing in the cabin, one that had never really been present before. Dark rubbed her temple.</p><p>“<b>Ugh- I’m sorry,</b>” she said. “<b>Headaches.</b>”</p><p>Wilford frowned. “Didn’t know headaches would come with a voice. I guess that’s not a ‘me’ thing. You wanna go outside? Maybe some fresh air would help-?”</p><p>“<b><em>No,</em></b>” Dark replied quickly, and she cleared her throat. “<b>No, it’s- it’s alright, Wilford. I get by perfectly fine staying inside while these headaches happen.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte sneezed in the corner, and Wilford rubbed her side.</p><p>“You sure you're okay?” he asked Dark. “You look a little frazzled.”</p><p>“<b>I </b> <b> <em>feel</em> </b> <b> frazzled,</b>” she admitted. “<b>But I’ll be alright.</b>”</p><p> </p><p><em> We’re really </em> <b> <em>not</em> </b> <em> , though. He was </em> <b> <em>just</em> </b> <em> here! </em></p><p>
  <em> Shut up! Will might hear you! </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>I’M TAKING CARE OF IT, WILL BOTH OF YOU PLEASE STOP?!</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark sighed harshly through her nose, rubbing her face with both of her hands. “<b>Mmmmmmm, okay, I </b> <b> <em>may</em> </b> <b> want to go outside.</b>”</p><p>“Great!”</p><p>“<strong>It is</strong><b><em>not </em> </b> <b>great.</b>”</p><p>“Not great, then!”</p><p>“<b>I just don’t want to go out too far,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Walking out of the cabin during migraines makes them get a bit… bigger.</b>”</p><p>Wilford nodded, standing up to his feet. “Alrighty, we’ll be careful!”</p><p>He offered for her to take his arm. What a goddamn gentleman. She took it, gingerly.</p><p>The two (well, three, once Charlotte got herself out of the cabin again) strolled outside of the cabin, with Dark leaning to a direction around it, with a dead tree stump just <em> sitting </em> there.</p><p>She felt a little guilty looking at it. <em> So </em> many axe marks. So many dead trees.</p><p>One tiny pink flower.</p><p>Dark shook her head, letting go of Wilford’s arm to walk over and sit down at the tree stump. She didn’t exactly notice that Wilford had tripped and grabbed onto her legs, and that she was somehow dragging him along with her by the feet. Wilford’s head was pressed on the side of the tree stump, but he seemed okay with it. Eventually she looked down at him, blinking.</p><p>“<b>What are you doing down there?</b>” she asked. Wilford sat up.</p><p>“Relaxing,” he said. “It’s a nice day out.”</p><p>“<strong>Do y</strong><b>ou want to come up?</b>”</p><p>Wilford had his legs crossed, and he leaned back while looking up at the sky. “No thanks. I like it down here.”</p><p>Dark raised a brow. “<b>Okay… Have fun down there.</b>”</p><p>“I most certainly will!” Wilford grinned, lying down on his back with his hands behind his head. Dark smiled weakly.</p><p>They sat for a few moments in silence, before she spoke again.</p><p>“<b>Tell me about your day?</b>”</p><p>Wilford looked up at her. “Pretty ay-okay so far! Had some pancakes with Abe this morning.”</p><p>“<b>Oh?</b>”</p><p>“Yeah. He got out the syrup n’ everything!”</p><p>Dark had her fingers together. “<b>Not sure if I ever had pancakes before.</b>”</p><p>Wilford gasped, sitting up. “They’re <em>really</em> good! I’ll have Abe make you some for next time- I’d <em> love </em> make you some now, but my baking’s absolute <em> shit- </em>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Oh, so just like the rest of you, then. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford frowned. Dark clearly noticed.</p><p>“<b>Are you alright?</b>” she asked, leaning over.</p><p>“Yeah- yeah, m’ fine.” He was looking down at himself, thumbs fidgeting. “I, ah… I guess the headaches are rubbing off on <em> me </em> today, too, heh!”</p><p>Dark smiled again, sympathetically. “<b>I’m sorry about that. Today may not have been a great day for us to see each other, but I do appreciate you visiting.</b>”</p><p>“I’m sorry we’re both getting headaches,” Wilford replied. “Kinda unexpected, huh?”</p><p>“<b>Everything kind of </b> <b> <em>has</em> </b> <b> to be,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Depends on how you think it’s a good thing or a bad thing.</b>”</p><p>“Well, I guess we both can agree that the headaches with a mean guy in our head is a bad thing,” Wilford said, getting his grin back.</p><p>
  <b> <em>You have no idea.</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford did not reply.</p><p>Charlotte’s head poked out from the corner of the cabin, and Wilford sat up. “Hi, again, girly!”</p><p>Her tail thumped against the ground, causing a bit of loose dirt to fly up. She looked very happy. She trotted over and nuzzled up against Wilford’s chest, and he rubbed his hands all over her muzzle, making a soft cooing sound. “Hello! <em> Hello! </em>”</p><p>Charlotte’s tail kept bonking against the wall of the cabin, with Dark silently cringing at the possibility of the wood collapsing. Finally, Charlotte just plopped onto the ground, resting her head on Wilford’s legs and staring up at him lovingly. After a long yawn from her, Wilford coughed lightly. “I must make a great pillow, huh?”</p><p>Dark snickered. Charlotte ignored her, smiling up at Wilford and closing her eyes.</p><p>For a while, Charlotte’s head stayed on Wilford’s lap, and he quietly patted her head.</p><p>If Abe was here, he’d <em> never </em> let Charlotte get this close to him. She was a big girl, yes, but she was also a very good girl. Wilford hoped Abe could see that, someday.</p><p>Quite subconsciously, Wilford yanked his phone out from his pocket, and took a good enough picture of Charlotte on his lap so he’d message it to Abe.</p><p> </p><p>“A good girl! :D &lt;3”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford chuckled as soon as he put his phone away. “Abe is gonna assume Charlotte is devouring me the second he sees the picture.”</p><p>“<b>Careful, he just might,</b>” Dark replied.</p><p>His phone jiggled.</p><p> </p><p>“Why do you have to give me that heart attack wilford its only 10 in the morning - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“Because it’s fun :P”</p><p> </p><p>“&gt;: ( - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford giggled, and Dark peered over his shoulder in interest.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re just jealous &gt;:)”</p><p> </p><p>“Being concerned for your safety isnt jealousy - its being concerned for your safety - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“You wouldn’t say that if Charlotte told me I was the best friend she ever had! So ha!”</p><p> </p><p>“I wouldnt because charlotte is a dog she cant talk - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“What if DARK said I was the best friend they ever had tho, think about that, duck”</p><p> </p><p>“goddammit - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford sent him a few senseless triumphant emoticons, and a little heart.</p><p>“<b>He should work on his punctuation,</b>” Dark said, and Wilford put his phone away again.</p><p>“I know, he’s <em> much </em> better on the computer,” he replied. “If he was here and I said that, he’d say I’m wrong, hehe!”</p><p>“<b>Why ‘duck’, if you don’t mind me asking?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I dunno, I just said it one day, and it stuck. He’s still a detective, so I like to play on the word whenever I’m ticked at him. Like, ‘duck-tective’, or the better version, ‘<em> dick- </em> dective’. Plus, if I call him duck when he’s angry at me, he gets all stuttery and blushy and it’s <em> very </em> funny. He called me ‘ <em> Bubbles </em>’ today, and I don't know how I feel about it.”</p><p>Wilford started laughing. “I don’t even know where the nickname ‘Bubbles’ came from, Abe just spat it out like it was normal for him to call me that!”</p><p>Dark shifted a bit on the stump. “<b>Maybe he kept it to himself for a while.</b>”</p><p>“Probably,” Wilford chuckled. “I mean… last night, he came out to me, so I guess he’s got other stuff he’d kept to himself that he’d like to say.”</p><p>“<b>Good for him,</b>” Dark replied.</p><p>“I mean, I don’t know <em> why </em>he’d keep it to himself. I’m not a baby.” Wilford made a sort of pouty face. Dark is pretty positive he’s not a baby. “We’ve lived together for years! I’m a grown man! I don’t get why he thinks he’s gotta protect me!”</p><p>“<b>Have you ever thought about why he thinks so?</b>”</p><p>“Because I act like a three year old and I always find some way to get into trouble, big deal.”</p><p>“<b>Well… yes,</b>” Dark admitted. “<b>But he wants you to be safe. He might be aware that you will be fine in any kind of situation you’re in, but, </b> <b> <em>maybe,</em> </b> <b> he doesn’t want to see you uncomfortable or hurt.</b>”</p><p>Wilford was able to turn to the tree stump and rest his arms on top of it next to Dark’s leg. “That mentality is confusing. If he <em> knows </em> I’ll be okay, why does he keep making sure I might <em> not </em> be okay?”</p><p>“<b>You know, Will, he probably just loves you,</b>” Dark said, slowly. Wilford looked up at her with big eyes for a moment, and his cheeks went pink.</p><p>“I know <em> that,</em>” he mumbled, sinking his mouth in the crook of his elbow. “I’m <em> amazing. </em> I’m a fucking <em> delight! </em>I-”</p><p>He slowly shook his head, making such a soft, pitched whine that Charlotte’s ears pricked up.</p><p>“He says he trusts me, but…” There was a longer pause than Wilford liked there to be. “I don’t think he knows he doesn’t.”</p><p>He felt a hand on his arm. “<b>I don’t think it’s that he doesn’t trust </b> <b>you.</b> <b> It’s that he doesn’t trust the world around you.</b>”</p><p>“He told me before I left that he doesn’t trust you at all,” Wilford said, with a growing sadness in his voice. “Are you not upset about that?”</p><p>“<b>I don’t doubt that he doesn’t trust me,</b>” Dark said, rubbing her thumb on Wilford’s arm. “<b>He’s done his research about me, but he doesn’t know </b> <b> <em>me.</em> </b> <b> Yes, I can do harmful things, harmful enough for people like Abe to not trust me at all, but that doesn’t mean I enjoy it. It’s a ‘must do what needs to be done’ thing… like cleaning my cabin.</b>”</p><p><b> <em>And taking the tiny shiny,</em> </b> Charlotte sleepily blinked.</p><p>“<b>People like me, people like Abe… we let the world get to us long ago. And Abe’s just trying to make sure the world doesn’t get to you, too.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Pretty sure it already has… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Shh. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>He cares about you a lot, Wilford. Most people are not so lucky.</b>”</p><p>Wilford sighed quietly through his nose. “Yeah, yeah.”</p><p>A small pat on Wilford’s arm, and he smirked. “<b>I suppose I </b> <b> <em>am</em> </b> <b> your therapist now, huh?</b>”</p><p>“Maybe?” Wilford giggled quietly. “I still don’t know how therapy works, but I guess I’m gonna go with my gut and accept that you’re my new therapist, ha!”</p><p>The two of them giggled for a moment, and Charlotte sighed. Wilford let out a small cough again.</p><p>It was kind of nice, sitting outside. To look out in the woods and not have to worry for a while… except Dark has a headache, but hopefully overtime, it’ll go away with all this nice fresh air. Dark gets it every day, really. It’s called being alive.</p><p>Eventually, it started to rain.</p><p>“Whoa!” Wilford exclaimed. “This is unexpected.”</p><p>Charlotte whined while standing up, and shook her already-wet head. Dark stared up at the sky. Almost black clouds.</p><p>“<b>Looks like a storm’s rolling in…</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s phone dinged again.</p><p> </p><p>“Wilford you better fucking be in an enclosed space -A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m going inside, MOM”</p><p> </p><p>“you better be -A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“Abe thinks we should get inside,” Wilford muttered. Dark nodded.</p><p>“<b>Not a bad idea,</b>” she said. She clicked softly, and Charlotte shook herself again before trudging over to the cabin. The two followed her, and Dark began to bolt the windows as soon as she got inside. The fire seemed to dim a little bit.</p><p>“Wouldn’t some rain come in through the chimney?” Wilford asked. “I always remember watching movies where it starts raining but the fire keeps going.”</p><p>“<b>It’s a </b> <b> <em>really </em> </b> <b>weird fireplace,</b>” Dark muttered, standing on a chair and trying to shove a rag inside a crack in the wall. “<b>I mostly just leave it alone.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte licked her nose. <b> <em>I don’t like weather.</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Rain can be peaceful, though,</b>” Dark added. “<b>It can make nice white noise.</b>”</p><p><b><em>Rain is wet. I hate wet. You never let me play outside.</em></b> Charlotte glared at Dark, licking her nose again.</p><p><b> <em>Because I don’t want you to drown the house. </em> </b>Dark fixed a lock of hair on her forehead.</p><p>Wilford was staring outside the window, mostly at how black the clouds became.</p><p>“How long do you think this is gonna last?” he asked, fingers fidgeting. “You think I’ll be able to get home?”</p><p>Dark glanced out the window for a moment. “<b>I don’t think so. It doesn’t look like it’s going to clear up in a while. It’s probably best if you stay here.</b>”</p><p>“Oh,” Wilford muttered.</p><p>“<b>Will that be a problem?</b>” She asked, glancing down at him. He shook his head.</p><p>“Nah, I’d rather be here than out in the rain,” Wilford said. “I think Abe would be okay with that.”</p><p>His phone jiggled in his pocket, and it wasn’t a text.</p><p>Hesitantly, Wilford answered Abe’s call and pressed his phone against his ear. “Hullo?”</p><p>“Are you on your way home???” Abe sounded SUPER concerned.</p><p>“<em>Should </em>I be on my way home?” Wilford asked. “It’s pouring pretty badly-”</p><p>“I don’t wanna have to wait until tomorrow to see if you ever came home,” Abe said.</p><p>“I know… I just thought it might not be safe to try to get home right now. A tree could fall on me, or something, you know?”</p><p>“You could come home before any of that happens,” Abe said. “You know, you could do your little zip zap power thing and then you’d be here.”</p><p>“It’s not… working. Not in the forest, anyway. I would if I could, duck.” Wilford could see Abe in his head, sighing stressfully. “Dark said the rain won’t go away for a bit, so I kinda <em> have </em> to stay.”</p><p>“I want you to come home <em> now,</em>” Abe said. “There’s gonna be a thunderstorm, and I know you don’t like those at all.”</p><p>Wilford paused. It’s true, but it’d probably be best if Abe wouldn’t remind him of that.</p><p>Shaking his head, Wilford smiled softly. “I’ll head home as soon as it’s safe. Honest.”</p><p>There was a pause on Abe’s end. Wilford poked his phone a bit. “Abe?”</p><p>“I’m coming to get you,” Abe said. “I’m not leaving you at some ghost diamond-burglar’s house.”</p><p>“What??”</p><p>Abe hung up. </p><p>“... Welp. He’s coming over.”</p><p>Dark clicked her tongue. “<b>Oh… </b> <b> <em>goody.</em></b>”</p><p>Wilford sat down on the floor, next to Charlotte again. “Well… I think it’ll still be okay for me to… <em> wait </em> here instead of staying for the whole night! Today didn’t go as planned, but it’s okay! At least I still came over!”</p><p>Dark smiled a little bit, but shook her head. “<strong>T</strong><b>he day I had was great. But if he’s coming to get you, then I’ll need to escort you out. Who knows what could happen?</b>”</p><p>“He’s just gonna yank me out,” Wilford replied. “I don’t think you have to worry.”</p><p>“<b>I like the way you see it, Wilford,</b>” Dark said. “<b>But if Abe is </b> <b> <em>that</em> </b> <b> determined to make sure you’re safe away from the weather, or me, I think it’d be better if he didn’t see me at all.</b>”</p><p>“Hey, I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about it.”</p><p>“<b>Just humor me? Please?</b>”</p><p>The two were staring at each other. Dark looked a bit sorry after her request. Wilford leaned back.</p><p>“Okay,” he said. “Once he gets here, I’ll go, I won’t force you to like him or anything. Does he make you feel bad?”</p><p>“<b>Not entirely,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>I can understand that if he doesn’t like me, then I shouldn’t show myself around him. I’ve dealt with it before, I’ll be alright.</b>”</p><p>“I‘m really sorry, Dark,” Wilford mumbled.</p><p>“<b>Don’t worry about it.</b>” Dark’s smile seemed very genuine. “<b>I’ve been dealing with people like Abe for 90 years, I can handle him.</b>”</p><p>“What a badass,” Wilford said. “You don’t care about what anybody thinks, and I like it.”</p><p>Dark chuckled. “<b>What, do </b> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <b> care?</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s face flushed, as much as he’d hate to admit it. “Not <em> all </em> the time. It depends on the person.”</p><p>“<b>Like Abe?</b>”</p><p>“Well… yeah, I guess so.” Wilford looked down for a moment. “I don’t want him to worry about me at all, but I guess it’s the storm’s fault for making him worried this time. I swear, he’s gonna turn himself inside out by the time he gets here.”</p><p>*<em>bzzt bzzt</em>*</p><p>*<em>bzzt bzzt</em>*</p><p>*<em>bzzt bzzt</em>*</p><p>Wilford reached in his pocket and pulled his phone out again, and it’s a text.</p><p> </p><p>“my car got stuck in the forest come help - A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“… Shit,” Wilford muttered.</p><p>“<b>What?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“I gotta- um… ” Wilford looked uncomfortable. “Can you come with me? Abe’s stuck.”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>” Dark asked again. “<b>Why do you want me to…?</b>”</p><p>Wilford sat up. “I…”</p><p>A low rumble was heard from outside, and Wilford looked out the window. A clear zig-zagged strike of lightning was seen in the distance, and there was a loud clash. Wilford froze.</p><p>“<em>That.</em>”</p><p>Oh.</p><p>“<b>Oh- </b> <em><b> oh</b></em><b><em>.</em> Of course. Let’s go. Charlotte?</b>” </p><p>The dog sort of seemed to shake her head. <b> <em>No. Wet.</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Suit yourself. Be a good girl.</b>” Dark took Wilford’s arm, and they hurried out of the cabin together. Wilford’s hand traveled down to Dark’s, gripping it tightly once he heard another rumble of thunder. She squeezed back, pulling him along at a brisk pace.</p><p>It almost felt like she’s done this before, like she knew what to do to ease Wilford’s anxiety.</p><p>Huh.</p><p>“<b>Did Abe say where he was?</b>” she asked him, over the howling winds.</p><p>“In his car! Dunno where though, probably somewhere near the entrance!”</p><p>“<b>Okay. We’re going to have to run, so hold tight.</b>”</p><p>Another crackle of thunder, and Wilford shrieked. Dark squeezed his hand again, and they began to bolt. </p><p>“How do you know where we’re supposed to go?!?” Wilford shouted. </p><p>“<b>I’m guessing his car would probably be near the entrance, or at least on a direct path from the entrance to the cabin- there’s a lot of felled trees, and rocks and garbage over there.</b>”</p><p>Sounds like Dark knows a lot about these woods. She’s definitely lived here for a while.</p><p>Every time thunder would rumble and lightning would flash, Wilford kept holding onto Dark tighter and tighter, unintentionally making her carry him. At least he was moving around.</p><p>Eventually, they both came across a freshly broken-down car, about a half hour away from the cabin. Wilford practically sobbed in relief, sprinting over. He knocked on the driver’s door multiple times.</p><p>“ABE! LEMME IN! LEMME IN! LEMME IN LEMME IN LEMME IN LEMME IN!!!”</p><p>Abe’s voice was muffled until he cracked open the window down. “Okay, okay…!”</p><p>The car doors unlocked, and Wilford shot into the back with a yelp. Dark stood outside. Drenched. In the rain. Alone.</p><p>Abe locked the door, without saying anything, Wilford opened the back door to let Dark in.</p><p>“You don’t wanna get sick, do you?” he asked. Abe looked at Wilford over his shoulder.</p><p>
  <em> What the hell, man-? </em>
</p><p>Wilford glared at him. <em> Be nice. </em></p><p>Dark smiled softly, letting herself in the car next to Wilford. Abe’s grip on the steering wheel tightened, and he was mumbling to himself. “I wanted to get the car out of the woods, but staying in is a <em> perfect </em> decision.”</p><p>“<b>I could get Charlotte to carry the car,</b>” Dark offered softly.</p><p>“<em>Nope,</em>” Abe replied, more quicker than he shouldn’t have. Wilford cleared his throat, wringing out his sweater.</p><p>“Charlotte doesn’t like getting wet,” he said, setting the jacket on his side of the seat. “You shouldn’t have to be so scared about her either way, duck.”</p><p>Dark and Abe sighed heavily.</p><p>“Wilford, you wanna help move the car?” Abe asked after a beat. “I think something blew a fuse and it just stopped moving.”</p><p>Wilford opened his mouth to reply, but was rudely interrupted by VERY LOUD AND VERY CLOSE THUNDER AND LIGHTNING STRIKE. All three were startled, but it was Wilford who kept screaming, and he began curling up into a ball and clapping his hands over his ears. Dark and Abe looked at Wilford for a moment, both unsure what to do.</p><p>Abe could comfort Wilford, but he had to get himself situated in the back seat when he was the one driving.</p><p>Dark could comfort Wilford, but she knew Abe wouldn’t like her touching him.</p><p><em> What a </em> <b> <em>fucking</em> </b> <em> pickle, </em> Wilford thought, with a quiet giggle. His whole body was trembling, and his fingers were gripping at his hair. He’s right, this <em> was </em> a fucking pickle.</p><p>Cautiously, Dark laid a hand on his shoulder. Even though she didn’t see, she knew Abe was staring at her <em> very </em> intensely. Even more so when Wilford sniffled, pulling her into a hug for a moment. Her face burned.</p><p>Then, with a sigh, he let go, leaning his head against the window and falling asleep. Even though it was still soaked, Wilford had his sweater on his lap like a mini blanket. It looked like he didn’t care, though.</p><p>After a long calming ten minutes of just the rain from outside the car, Abe was looking down at his pedals, and he sighed. He turned back over to face Dark.</p><p>“Help move my car?” he asked.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This chapter is twice as longer than I initially thought, woops!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. What is This Feeling, So Sudden and New?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<b>Try it now.</b>”</p><p>Wheezing machinery sounds. “Nope.”</p><p>Loud scuffing sounds, and a grunt.</p><p>“<b>Now, try it again.</b>”</p><p>More wheezing machinery sounds. “It’s not working.”</p><p>They’d been at it for over an hour. The car had moved all of 15 inches, and Wilford was still fast asleep. The rain died down a notch, but it was still sprinkling. Abe got out of the car, mumbling curses to himself, probably so he wouldn’t wake Wilford up. He was practically sprawled all over the back seat as the time went on.</p><p>“<b>I don’t think we’re able to get this out of here,</b>” Dark said, pushing her hair back from her face. “<b>This never happened when other people trespassed through here with their cars before.</b>”</p><p>Abe squinted at Dark when she said “<b>trespassed</b>”, but didn’t reply to it.</p><p>“We could get a tow truck to pull it out,” he said. “But my phone is dead, so my car is basically fucked.”</p><p>“<b>Has it been having problems before?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“No,” Abe said. “It was perfectly fine until earlier. The gas was still in it once I was on my way.”</p><p>“<b>Huh… strange. Are you sure you don’t want me to get Charlotte?</b>”</p><p>“Yep,” Abe replied quickly.</p><p>Dark sighed. “<b>Yeah, I figured…</b>”</p><p>She shivered quietly. It was pretty cold out.</p><p>A bit of quiet again before Abe unlocked the car. She took this as permission to slide into the passenger seat- she didn’t dare go to sit next to Wilford. Abe said nothing either way.</p><p>Both were silent for a very long while. It was still raining, and then eventually nighttime, but Dark’s aura was light enough for Abe to be… subtly grateful, so that he couldn’t have to waste time trying to turn his car on again.</p><p>Abe looked over his shoulder to check on Wilford, who was still sleeping, snoring almost obnoxiously. His sweater had dried off a bit, so he was no longer shivering.</p><p>Dark sighed quietly.</p><p>“<b>I’m sorry we can’t move your car,</b>” she said. “<b>I know you want me as far away from you as possible, but Wilford wanted me to stay, so… I didn’t want to go against his wishes.</b>”</p><p>Abe scoffed. “Went against <em> mine </em> though.”</p><p>“<b>What else could I have done?</b>” Dark asked, brows narrowing slightly. Abe shrugged.</p><p>“I don’t know,” he said. “Turn invisible? Stay behind a tree and talk to Wilford in his sleep or something?”</p><p>She chuckled softly. “<b>That’s not… really how it works.</b>”</p><p>Abe looked away, and Dark let out a long, deeper sigh. It sounded a bit more… well, masculine. “<b>Give me a second.</b>”</p><p>He threw his scarf in the back, and pulled on his coat. “<b>Continue being a pissed-off detective if you wish.</b>”</p><p>Abe opened his mouth, but found no retort. He crossed his arms and leaned back against his seat.</p><p>“Once it stops raining, you can go get Charlotte, as if she’ll be any help,” he muttered. “Just don’t let her near me.”</p><p>“<b>Noted,</b>” Dark murmured softly.</p><p>They stewed in silence, while Wilford snored away in the back. Dark shifted uncomfortably in his seat. One of Abe’s legs were bouncing up and down impatiently.</p><p>… It was very awkward.</p><p>After far too long of this, Dark swallowed, taking in a deep breath. “<b>I… you know…</b>”</p><p>He laced his fingers together, his resolve seeming to strengthen. “<b>Before all of this, before you and Will forgot about me, chased him around the world-</b>”</p><p>Abe visibly flinched, and Dark’s lips twitched. “<b>Yes, I know all about that.</b>”</p><p>Abe wanted to say something, but didn’t find any words.</p><p>Dark looked down, studying the floor mats. “<b>But in the time before all of this, before you forgot everything… we used to be friends.</b>”</p><p>The detective was staring at him now in silent shock. Dark finally met his eyes with a very understanding look. “<b>I know you don’t like me. I know I haven’t given you much reason to, but- we </b> <b> <em>were </em> </b> <b>friends once, Abraham. You took care of Will when I could not. I…</b>”</p><p>A sigh.</p><p>“<b>I won’t forget that,</b>” Dark said, a small smile curling on his face. “<b>I really appreciate you watching over William when I couldn’t.</b>”</p><p>Abe had a troubled look, with Dark knowing he already wanted to ask questions.</p><p><em> Why not? </em> Was the main one Dark caught. <em> Why couldn’t you watch over him before he and I were even friends? </em></p><p>The gentle smile on Dark’s face faded. Very somber. “<b>I have my reasons. I want to tell you, but…</b>”</p><p>He eyed Wilford, who was still asleep.</p><p>“<b>Not right now,</b>” he whispered. “<b>I promise you, I will soon.</b>”</p><p>He looked at the door. “<b>But if you want me to leave, Abe, I understand completely.</b>”</p><p>Once Dark put his hand on the door handle, Abe hesitated. “Wait- um… Wilford would be upset if he didn’t see you leave.”</p><p>Dark smiled quietly.</p><p>“<b>Very well.</b>”</p><p>“Mmmmmmmmmrgh…”</p><p>Both Dark and Abe looked over their shoulders to see Wilford squirming on the backseat.</p><p>Was he having a nightmare?</p><p>“<em>Mmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnghh…</em>” Wilford had his eyes shut tight, and he was clinging onto his sweater like a pillow or a stuffed animal.</p><p>Dark leaned over, reaching a hand out, only for Abe to hold it back.</p><p>“What are you doing?” he asked quietly. “He doesn’t like getting touched when he’s having bad dreams…”</p><p>Wilford’s body was rocking itself awkwardly, while still being sprawled out. “Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it…”</p><p>“<b>I want to help him,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>Something wrong is going on in his dream.</b>”</p><p>“You don’t think I don’t know that?” Abe asked. “That’s what nightmares are for.”</p><p>“<b>This is more than a nightmare, detective,</b>” Dark said, resting his hand on Wilford’s forehead. “<b>I don’t exactly know what, but I know it’s something bad.</b>”</p><p>Wilford whimpered at the cool touch. Dark slowly drew his hand back, but Wilford then grabbed onto it, almost desperately.</p><p>Keeping the hand close to his cheek, Wilford started smiling softly with a peaceful sigh.</p><p>“<b>There we are,</b>” Dark whispered. In a quick moment, Wilford opened his eyes.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Real Life, or Fantasy?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s cold in his dream.</p><p>Wilford was walking around in a place he does not recognize, the ruins of an old building. Vines from bushes were growing on statues of knights and pillars from outside, with thorns on some edges.</p><p>It was <em> creepy, </em> even with moss crawling all over the walls and the ceiling. It felt like nothing was alive in this place… except for the plants, the moss, and some… spiders.</p><p>At the back of the building, there was a pool that was flooded with dead leaves, old swampy water that looks like it hasn’t been cleaned out in <em> ages, </em> and a few frogs were hopping on the edges.</p><p>This felt far too real to just be a simple dream. Nothing was colorful, but everything was vivid.</p><p>
  <em> Have I been here before? </em>
</p><p>“<em>Will! </em> ” A voice called out. Wilford turned his head over a corner from where the voice came from. “<em>Come on down, friend! </em>”</p><p>The voice was very clear, even though it was from inside. It was down a hallway, to a gate that leads to a set of stairs, down a cellar. It looked a long way down.</p><p>“<em>I’m coming! </em>” Wilford opened up the gate door, and stared down the steps at how far they went. What, is this cellar leading to an underground railroad?</p><p>“<em>Don’t be shy! </em> ” the voice exclaimed. “<em>I just wanna have a nice chat is all! </em>”</p><p>For some reason, even though he didn’t trust the voice- not one bit- he began to descend.</p><p>This <em> definitely </em> is gonna lead to an underground railroad… full of wine bottles. All of them were stacked neatly on wooden shelves on the wall, and there were barrels in the corner of the cellar, presumably full of wine or beer as well. Or maybe wine bottles floating <em> inside </em> the wine/beer, from inside of the barrels. Probably.</p><p>“<em>What’d you want me down here for, then? I thought all the festivities were happening upstairs.</em>”</p><p>“<em>Oh, dear, no! I just wanted to play a little game! You wouldn’t deny me that, after all you’ve </em> <b> <em>done </em> </b> <em> for me… really now, </em> <b> <em> would </em> </b> <em> you? </em>”</p><p>Wilford paused, only to find out that the voice was nowhere in the cellar. It came from everywhere, but whoever was saying all of this was nowhere to be seen.</p><p>“<b><em>Would</em> </b> <em> you? </em>”</p><p>One of Will’s eyes twitched. “<em>No… n </em> <em> o, </em> <em> I s </em> <em> up </em> <em> po </em> <em> se no </em> <em> t. </em>”</p><p>“<b><em>Very good.</em> </b>”</p><p>There was a loud clash of glass breaking on the floor, and Wilford cupped his ears at how unexpected it was. He moved a foot, and there was a broken wine bottle with liquid all over the floor.</p><p>“<em>W </em> <em> ha </em> <em> t </em> <em> - </em> <em> ? </em>”</p><p>The other voice clicked it’s tongue. “<em> Guess you can’t hold your booze, either. </em>”</p><p>“<em>Heh…! I suppose not… again.</em>”</p><p>Wilford blinked, suddenly feeling his head throb. “<em> O </em> <em> w- wh </em> <em> at-? </em> <em> Tha </em> <em> t’s not </em> <em> me… </em>”</p><p>Backing up against the wall, Wilford held onto his head with his hands, trying to keep himself upright.</p><p>“<em>Still a bit tipsy, huh? </em>” the voice asked.</p><p>Still gripping at his head, Wilford groaned. “<em>Mmmmmmmmmrgh…</em>”</p><p>“<em>I’ll bet you have </em> <b> <em>no idea </em> </b> <em> what’s going on.</em>” The voice sounded like it was coming closer and closer to Will’s ear, almost uncomfortably so.</p><p>An invisible hand on his shoulder. The fingers dug into his skin.</p><p>“<em>Mmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnghh…</em>” Wilford shut his eyes tight at the feeling, gritting his teeth. What the hell is happening?</p><p>“<em>I bet you’d </em> <b> <em>love</em> </b> <em> to find out,</em>” the voice said.</p><p>Wilford crouched down to the floor, and started rocking slightly. “<em>Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it…</em>”</p><p>The voice merely laughed. “<em>Oh, dear. Oh, </em> <b> <em>dear</em> </b> <em> . You poor, sweet idiot. I’m not doing anything at all.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>This is more than a nightmare, detective.</em></b>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford’s eyes shot open, with the clawing feeling in his shoulder gone. There was a frustrated sigh.</p><p>“<em>Look who’s here,</em>” the voice mumbled with a small growl. “<em>Never thought the </em> <b> <em>villain</em> </b> <em> of the story would come and save the day, but here we are…</em>”</p><p><em> W </em> <em> h </em> <em> a </em> <em> t </em> <em> … </em> <em> ? </em></p><p>Slowly, there was a cold and calming touch on Will’s forehead, and he uncontrollably whimpered in response. The voice snarled.</p><p>“<em>Those idiots </em> <b> <em>really</em> </b> <em> think they can be helpful at this moment? It’d be </em> <b> <em>wonderful</em> </b> <em> if they just stuck with what they’re </em> <b> <em>supposed</em> </b> <em> to do.</em>”</p><p>The cooling touch on Wilford’s head faded slightly, but he reached out to grab it back. It felt nice, far nicer than the voice.</p><p>Keeping the touch close to his cheek, Wilford started smiling softly with a peaceful sigh.</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>There we are.</em></b>”</p><p> </p><p>The voice cursed, and in a quick moment, Wilford opened his eyes.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Are We Home Yet?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Dark? Abe? What’s wrong?”</p><p>Both answered at the same time; “<b>Abe’s </b> had <b>is </b> nightmare,” or “You <b>car </b> a <b>broken.</b>”</p><p>A pause.</p><p>“You had a nightmare-”</p><p>“<b>Abe’s car is broken-</b>”</p><p>Wilford blinked, slowly sitting up just to tilt his head in confusion. “Okaaaaaay…?”</p><p>“Are you okay?” Abe asked.</p><p>“I… I don’t know?” Wilford was rubbing his head. “My dream was <em> super </em> strange.”</p><p>“<b><em>Strange</em> </b> <b> is how you’d describe it?</b>” Dark asked. Wilford blinked in surprise, only just noticing that Dark’s look had changed. “<b>You were squirming all over the place and hugging my arm like your life depended on it… are you sure you’re alright?</b>”</p><p>Wilford was quiet for a moment, and shrugged. “I don’t… really know. Maybe I’m okay. I don’t feel particularly weird, or anything.”</p><p>He didn’t want to tell them about it. He didn’t want to worry them.</p><p>Dark’s eyes squinted slightly. “<b>Is that all?</b>”</p><p>“I… can’t really remember.”</p><p>Dark’s squint was still the same, Wilford staring back at him. Abe just had the usual “I am worried for you but I don’t wanna show it” look on his face.</p><p>“So how did starting the car work out?” Wilford asked, quietly trying to change the subject.</p><p>Dark shook his head. “<b>Not so well. Now that you’re awake, I’m going to go fetch Charlotte so she can carry it to a mechanic or something.</b>”</p><p>Abe shot Dark a look. “What? I thought our deal was once it stopped raining, you could go get her.”</p><p>“<b>Our deal expired,</b>” Dark replied, opening the door to stand up outside from the car. “<b>It’s just sprinkling, detective. Charlotte has handled it before, it’ll be fine.</b>”</p><p>“But-”</p><p>“<b>It’s </b> <b>fine.</b>” It wasn’t forceful.</p><p>There was a small pause, and Abe shook his head. “If you think so.”</p><p>“<b>I </b> <b> <em>do</em> </b> <b> think so.</b>”</p><p>And like that, he was gone. Wilford grinned at Abe.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>A giggle.</p><p>“<em>What? </em>”</p><p>“You two are frieeeeeeeends!”</p><p>Abe scoffed. “No, we’re not.”</p><p>Wilford sat on the very edge of the seat, grinning. “Yeah you are! You did something without getting mad at each other! That’s <em> friendship! </em>”</p><p>“It’s <em> tolerance.</em>” Abe attempted to grab Wilford’s face to shove him away, but he already leaned back on the seat.</p><p>“Nahhh, if it was tolerance then, you would have made Dark get Charlotte earlier, even though it was raining.”</p><p>“It’s <em> still </em> raining, Wilford-”</p><p>Wilford waved a finger. “<em>Sprinkling, </em> Abe! And <em> you </em>didn’t bring it up, Dark did!”</p><p>“That’s… true.” Abe glanced over to Wilford, seeing a wide smile. He could feel his face getting hot, and he turned back to his steering wheel. “Shut up.”</p><p>Wilford chuckled. “That’s so <em> sweet </em>. I’m glad you two aren’t fighting anymore.”</p><p>Abe’s finger fiddled on the wheel. “I mean… I still don’t really trust him, but… it’s a start, I guess.”</p><p>Wilford clapped once. “Yay!”</p><p>There was a beat of silence, with only the sound of small pellets of rain from branches falling on top of Abe’s car.</p><p>“So what else is going on?” Wilford asked, tired of the silence.</p><p>“Not a whole lot right now,” Abe replied. “Still have to find out if Dark stole that diamond, though.”</p><p>Wilford rolled his eyes. “Jeez, <em> again </em> with the diamond?”</p><p>“It’s our <em> job</em><em>,</em> buddy.” Abe’s tone was surprisingly calm. “We kinda <em> have </em> to focus on it, more than anything. We need to be asking people for more evidence, not sitting in the middle of nowhere, waiting for a ‘friend’ to bring their bear-bus-demon-dog over to move my car.”</p><p>“I like them, though,” Wilford replied, crossing his arms. “Why can’t we just bring them both along for the ride? Maybe they can help us more…”</p><p>Abe sighed. <em> This is so fucking like you. </em></p><p>
  <em> Ha. You know what you signed up for, duck. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yeah yeah, yeah. Spare me the lecture. </em>
</p><p>Wilford giggled. “You can lie to me all you want, Abe. I know <em> something </em>happened.”</p><p>“Yes, something <em> did </em> happen, and it was okay,” Abe replied, quickly. “Nothing too drastic, it was just a talk.”</p><p>He couldn’t tell Wilford all of the details, not yet- he chose to believe that Dark was telling the truth.</p><p>“I never care about the details, honestly,” Wilford said. “I’m just happy you’re trying to get along with Dark now, and I didn’t have to force you to!”</p><p>“Me too, buddy.”</p><p>Wilford pat his shoulder, and rested his chin on it… poorly. Abe snorted, which caused a soft chuckle on Wilford’s part.</p><p>In the distance, a gray glow in the trees became brighter and brighter. Abe gulped quietly, and Wilford sat up grinning. “‘M okay, duck.”</p><p>“Yeah, I believe you,” Abe said, stiff at the glow coming closer and closer to the car. “I just don’t believe what the dog is gonna do.”</p><p>“Awe, Charlotte’s not <em> so </em> bad.”</p><p>Abe glared at Wilford. “You haven’t seen what <em> I’ve </em> seen yesterday.”</p><p>“I know, I know. Big dog scawwy.”</p><p>“She’s not scary!” Abe exclaimed. “It’s… the surprise.”</p><p>Wilford nodded, playing along. “Whatever you say!”</p><p>Happy barking. Wilford found himself smiling again, pressing a teasing peck to Abe’s cheek before hopping out of the car. The detective’s face turned red.</p><p>“Hi again, pretty lady!!” Abe heard Wilford shout, and he was pressing his face against Charlotte’s leg. “You get to see me twice in one day!!”</p><p>The dog let out a squeal, plopping down on the ground (which caused the car to shake a little bit). Wilford let go of her leg, burrowing into the side of her muzzle.</p><p>“Look at you,” he cooed. “What a good girl!”</p><p>Her tail was thumping up against a tree. She looked very flattered, though how a dog could be flattered was beyond him.</p><p>Abe was frozen in his car, clutching onto his wheel as this… adorableness weirdness happens.</p><p><em> It’s not a big deal… </em> Abe thought. <em> She’s just a dog… Wilford likes the dog… I’m </em> <b> <em>just</em> </b> <em> starting to like Dark now, and the dog is Dark’s… so I guess I kinda </em> <b> <em>have</em> </b> <em> to like the dog… No pressure… </em></p><p>Abe slowly got out of his car, staring up at Charlotte. He keeps on forgetting how big this dog is. Wilford was climbing up on her back, only to sit on her neck to scratch her head.</p><p>Charlotte stared down at Abe, licking her nose.</p><p>Abe sighed, slowly putting a hand on her paw. “Hi… hi… <em> hi…</em>”</p><p>The dog rewarded him with a gentle nuzzle against the chest. Wilford slid off her neck to land on the ground, clasping his face in surprise.</p><p>
  <em> You did it!!! </em>
</p><p>Abe forced a grin. <em> Don’t rub it in, please… I’m fucking </em> <b> <em>scared.</em> </b></p><p>A whine. <b> <em>Aw, don’t be scared, grumpy old man.</em> </b></p><p>Abe slowly started hyperventilating through his nose, with his fingers trembling. <em> HOLY SHIT- </em></p><p>“Shh! Just pet her!” Wilford was lying on his stomach, smiling wide. Abe gulped, timidly patting at her cheek. The dog looked down at him in awe. Wilford was hugging his face, composing a few happy squeals.</p><p>Dark was just… standing near Abe’s car, silently watching this… bonding moment go down? Yeah, let’s go with that.</p><p>He thought it was sweet, in… a strange sort of way.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Come on, let’s just go already… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Did we come all this way again just to go through this mushiness? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>After a second though, Dark felt impatient. “<b>Are we ready to try and make Charlotte move the car, or no?</b>”</p><p>“Y- yeah. Let’s do that, please.” Abe backed away from Charlotte, and Wilford hopped up to his feet.</p><p>“<b>Let’s see if we’re able to make this work… Sweetheart? Can you gently pick up mister Abe’s car for me?</b>”</p><p>Charlotte only huffed out a sigh through her nose again, glaring down at Dark. He took a deep breath and sighed, growling. Charlotte shook her head, scrunching up her nose. <b> <em>Metal tastes funny.</em> </b></p><p>“<b>It would make mister Abe </b> <b> <em>very</em> </b> <b> happy, Charlotte,</b>” Dark coaxed.</p><p>Charlotte blinked slowly, and then huffed again, resigned. <b>… </b> <b> <em>Okay.</em> </b></p><p>Dark smiled. “<b>Thank you.</b>”</p><p>“He really needs to learn how to say please to his dog,” Wilford whispered into Abe’s ear.</p><p>“Well, she’s a dog,” Abe said. “It takes animals a bit to listen, I don’t think it matters if you use manners or not.”</p><p>“She’s not a normal animal, though,” Wilford replied. </p><p>There was a small pause with Abe staring at nothing. He lightly pointed a finger. “You’re right. Ignorance is her go-to, then.”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Do you want me to pick up your car or not?</em> </b>
</p><p>Abe put his hands up in a sort of “whoa” reaction. “Um… yes, please.”</p><p>The dog huffed, stomping over to the vehicle. She had a small struggle, looking at it from different angles. It’s clear that this must be new to Charlotte, so this is understandably confusing.</p><p>But how does she know she doesn’t like the taste of metal?</p><p>“<b>She tried eating a car once,</b>” Dark said. “<b>She was very young then.</b>”</p><p>Wilford ‘aww’ed.</p><p>Charlotte growled, slowly opening her mouth to the front of the car. Abe’s fingers clung onto his sides, trying to keep a straight face.</p><p>
  <em> It’s just a car, it’s just a car, it’s just a car, it’s just a car… </em>
</p><p>Snarling, Charlotte picked up the car, lifting it a few feet in the air. She looked like she was about to sneeze.</p><p>
  <b> <em>I like fetch. I’m trying to imagine this as fetch. This isn’t fetch.</em> </b>
</p><p>“<b>Don’t worry, Charlotte,</b>” Dark said. “<b>We just have to be quick.</b>”</p><p>“I feel like we need to fix it the second she puts it down,” Abe mumbled. “So many bite marks…”</p><p>Charlotte huffed again, brushing her tail on Abe’s face. <b> <em>I don’t like this either! I’d like this garbage to be out of my mouth too!</em> </b></p><p>“<em>Hey! </em>” Abe coughed out a few hairs.</p><p>“<b>Let’s get this over with, you two.</b>” Dark brushed off remaining fur on Abe’s shoulders.</p><p>Wilford asserted himself to climb on Charlotte’s back again. “Wilford ‘Moral Support’ Warfstache, at your service~!”</p><p>Charlotte let out a complaining whine. Wilford patted at the back of her head.</p><p>“You’ll be okay, girly,” he said. “We just have to find a place to fix Abe’s car, and then poof! Your job is done.”</p><p>“Can we go right now, though?” Abe asked. “Just by looking at my car so beaten up in her mouth already, it makes me feel sick.”</p><p>Abe was hit in the face by Charlotte’s tail again.</p><p>Dark rolled his eyes, with his fingers rubbing against each other. “<b>Let’s just go, already.</b>”</p><p>There was a small, but almost forceful sense of pressure on Abe’s back, making him walk along with Dark and Charlotte without him really noticing it. Wilford was just on Charlotte’s back, oblivious to what Abe just felt.</p><p>After a while of walking out of the woods, Wilford giggled to himself.</p><p>“<b>What are you laughing about, up there?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>Feeling light-headed, are you?</b>”</p><p>Wilford waved a hand. “No, I get that all the time! It’s just that riding Charlotte reminds me a lot of a movie I watched a long time ago. Do you guys know Catbus?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Waitin’, Waitin’, Waitin’</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They’d arrived at a closed building with multiple broken down cars a little while ago- Charlotte had spat out the car and hurried off somewhere to get the metallic tang out of her mouth. No one had dared to follow her.</p><p>The car landed on its top side, with the alarm going off.</p><p>“Why did she have to do that?!” Abe asked, covering his ears. “Why did she just <em> drop </em> it?!”</p><p>“She helped move the car, didn’t she?” Wilford asked loudly, with his ears covered as well. “Be grateful!”</p><p>Dark, not covering his ears at all, walked right over to the blaring upside-down car. He grabbed it by the front with one hand, and seemed to pick the entire vehicle up in the air with ease. With a twist of his hand, the car turned right-side-up, landing on its now flattened and loose tires. He snapped his fingers, and the wailing stopped. Dark looked more calm after what he just did.</p><p>“<b>I needed that,</b>” he said, flexing his hand.</p><p>The other men were staring.</p><p>“Could you do that the whole time?!?” Abe asked.</p><p>Dark smirked, shrugging. “<b>There was no way I could have carried it all the way to your apartment.</b>”</p><p>“Dark, that was <em> amazing! </em>” Wilford grinned widely.</p><p>“<b>I’ll pay for the damages. That was fun.</b>”</p><p>“I’ll bet it was!” Wilford replied, clearly in awe.</p><p>Abe was staring at his wrecked-than-ever car. “Didn’t look like it on the car’s part…”</p><p>“Oh, live a little, Abe,” Wilford said. “Let it go! The car is gonna be fixed in no time.”</p><p>Abe glanced over at the door of the building, and there was a “CLOSED” sign. He sighed. “My car…”</p><p>“<em>Bye, Darkie! </em>” Wilford said over him.</p><p>“Wait- what?” Abe asked. It was just Wilford standing behind him. “Where- Where did Dark go?”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I dunno. He’s just-” he spread out his hands, waving them dramatically- “<em>poof</em><em>.</em>”</p><p>“‘Poof’ doesn’t mean anything, Wilford.”</p><p>“Well, he did!” Wilford said. “He’s gone now! <em> Poof! </em>”</p><p>A little snort. “Alright then.”</p><p>Wilford looked over at the “CLOSED” sign on the door. “Should we just wait here, or no?”</p><p>“You can do whatever you want, Wilford,” Abe replied. “I’m waiting because <em> it’s my car.</em>”</p><p>“Okay, okay. Sheesh. Have you named the thing yet, or what?”</p><p>Abe fought back a chuckle. “No- Just go home, will you?”</p><p>“What sort of man would I be if I left you and a damsel in distress all alone, in the not-so-rain?” Wilford was smiling, and leaned against the battered car. “Amirite, <em> Veronica? </em>”</p><p>“The car’s name isn’t-”</p><p>“It’s Veronica. It’s <em> sexy,</em>” Wilford teased, somehow keeping a straight face.</p><p>Abe waved his hands, trying not to laugh. “I’m- he- his name isn’t <em> that-</em>”</p><p>Wilford gasped and pointed a finger. “Ahh! He! <em> His! </em> What’s <em> his </em> name, then, <em> HMMMMMM? </em>”</p><p>“I didn’t-” Abe wheezed a bit. “I didn’t <em> name-</em>”</p><p>Wilford was grinning madly at this point. “If you won’t name the damn car, then I guess <em> I </em>will.”</p><p>“You don’t have to do that,” Abe replied.</p><p>Wilford waved his pointing finger at him. “You leave me no choice, duck! Besides, I’m really good at naming things.”</p><p>He squinted at the car again, through narrowed eyes. “Mmmmm… you look like aaaaaaaa… LLLLLLL… Leon, Leon. It’s Leon.”</p><p>Abe had a blank face. “What the hell is a Leon.”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “Shit if I know, something about lions, probably. But that’s what it is!”</p><p>Abe looked over at the car- Leon, again, for a moment. “...Sure.”</p><p>The two stood for a while, and Wilford was breaking the silence by kicking small pebbles and clicking his tongue.</p><p>“You want a snack while we wait?” he asked. “I can go fetch an ice cream if you’d like one.”</p><p>“No, I…” Abe paused. “Chocolate, please.”</p><p>Wilford snapped his fingers, and ran off. “Coming right up, bub!”</p><p>He was gone for a little while- Abe stared off into space for a good ten minutes before an ice cream cone began to wave in front of his face. Wilford was right behind Abe, by standing on top of the car. “Ground Control to Major President-slash-Detective Abraham Lincoln, ice cream incoming!”</p><p>Abe chuckled as Wilford handed him the cone. “Thanks, bud.”</p><p>Wilford made an explosion sound with his mouth, and his hands to gesture along. The detective smiled quietly. “You having a good day?”</p><p>“Eh. Could be worse.” With a small hop, Wilford sat on the car, and Abe hid a wince. “Something could have exploded, but… today’s a good day!”</p><p>Except for that one moment where he had a bad dream… It’s like Wilford completely forgot about that part.</p><p>“What part?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“Nothing, nothing.” Abe figured that would happen. “Bunch of stuff is happening lately, I don’t think you should worry about any kind of part about it.”</p><p>
  <em> Except for the diamond. </em>
</p><p>Abe frowned. “Oh. Yeah. That.”</p><p>“You still worried about that thing?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“Maybe a little,” Abe admitted. “Less than I should be…”</p><p>A little smile from the madman, and a pat on the shoulder. “It’ll turn up, duck. These things always do.”</p><p>“I <em> swear </em> I thought I’d find it in your room,” Abe said.</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted. “... Why would it be in my room? I didn’t steal it. I thought you thought <em> Dark </em>did.”</p><p>“No, I still do,” Abe replied. “Let’s just say I… thought Dark misplaced it somewhere when they came over a while ago.”</p><p>“When you were gonna go out for coffee??? How convenient!”</p><p>Abe nodded, pursing his lips. “Yep.”</p><p>“... I guess I can ask them…”</p><p>“Haven’t you thought of doing that before?” Abe asked. “I thought you were gonna visit Dark for that reason.”</p><p>“No,” Wilford replied. “I didn’t… or at least I don’t think so? I must have forgotten again. Sorry.”</p><p>“It’s okay.” Ice cream was already dripping on Abe’s hand, but he didn’t care. He sort of forgot why he had it. “Want some?”</p><p>Wilford smiled. “Yes please!”</p><p>They passed the cone around, silently, waiting. Abe looked down at his watch, and his eyes widened.</p><p>“We’ve been waiting for a while,” he said. “I don’t think they’re coming.”</p><p>Wilford pointed at a window of the building. “There’s a little schedule over there.”</p><p>Of course there was. “What do we do?”</p><p>“... I could look after Leon, I think the mechanic guy comes back in a few hours,” Wilford offered.</p><p>Abe groaned. <em> Hours??? </em></p><p>“Yes, hours,” Wilford replied. “You could look into the diamond thing again, I know you’re worried about it. Maybe take a nap. Eat something without sugar in it.”</p><p>“But-”</p><p>“No, no buts. I’m a big boy. I can sit still.”</p><p>Abe shook his head. “I don’t believe that for a second.”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “That’s fair. I try. Now shoo! I can take another nap while you go look for the tiny shiny doo-hickey!”</p><p>“Are you sure?” Abe asked. “Do you even know how to talk to a mechanic? You practically know <em> nothing </em> about cars…”</p><p>Wilford laughed. “Ye of little faith!”</p><p>“I’ll write something down.” Abe pulled out a piece of paper from out of nowhere, and yoinked out a pen. Wilford sighed.</p><p>“You’re denying my skills, duck,” he said, leaning back on the windshield.</p><p>“Yes, yes, you’re a mechanical mastermind, bubbles,” Abe muttered. “Just make sure the <em> actual </em> mechanic doesn’t get pissed that you’re <em> lying on my car.</em>”</p><p>“It’s busted anyway,” Wilford said. “I’m just warming it up for ‘em.”</p><p>Abe placed the piece of paper on Wilford’s face. “Give that to them once they’re here. I’m gonna investigate the apartment again.”</p><p>“Alrighty,” Wilford gave Abe a thumbs up. “I’m gonna be the best car guard you’ll ever see in your life, just you wait.”</p><p>“Mmmhmm. Bye.”</p><p>“Buh-bye, see ya!” Wilford shut his eyes, and he heard Abe walk away.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. I Dunno, are YOU Okay?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>While Wilford was asleep, an hour or two had passed, and the mechanic <em> finally </em> came. Wilford didn’t notice, of course, but he knew that the mechanic would come <em> some </em>time. Business transaction took ten minutes, fifteen minutes tops.</p><p>Wilford was still asleep, though. Poor lady had to shake him awake.</p><p>“Now, I want you to take <em> very </em>good care of this car, okay? Abe’ll kill me if it doesn’t work right, he loves this thing.”</p><p>The mechanic nodded, smiling. She moved her hands in multiple gestures that Wilford couldn’t exactly decipher… which was actually fine, because mind reading!</p><p>
  <em> Not a problem! I’ve taken care of cars like this before, it will be fine. </em>
</p><p>Wilford smiled. <em> Cool. I’ll leave this in your very capable hands, I’m sure. </em></p><p>The woman blinked, but then shrugged, smiling back.</p><p>
  <em> I have your friend’s note in my pocket, I’ll call once I get this bad boy up and running again. </em>
</p><p>“Thank you very much!” It was then that Wilford saw the name of the building. “<em>Miss Petrie’s Working Hands</em>”... Makes sense. “Bye, uh… Petrie?”</p><p><em> It’s short for Patricia. </em> She smiled.</p><p>
  <em> Ah. </em>
</p><p>Well, that was nice! Wilford left the girl alone with Abe’s car, with a pleasant feeling, and he went his way over to the apartment.</p><p>Wilford didn’t know how Abe managed to do it, but the apartment had been turned into an absolute mess in all of thirty minutes. He must be in his more ‘spiderweb’ moods. And Wilford thought <em> he </em> would trash the place while in search of small things. There was already a yarn chart on parts of the wall.</p><p>“Abe, I’m home!”</p><p>Abe’s head suddenly popped up from underneath the coffee table. “What-? Oh- Hi, Wilf- sorry.”</p><p>Wilford found himself giggling. “Whatcha doing there?”</p><p>“Oh, uhh…” Abe looked like he was trying to think of something funny. “Making coffee.”</p><p>Wilford sat down on the floor next to Abe with his legs crossed. “Really? Must be pretty intense coffee.”</p><p>“... Yeah?”</p><p>“You doing your detectively thing again?”</p><p>“Yeah…”</p><p>A smile. “Want me to leave you alone for a bit? You look focused.”</p><p>Wilford was right on the ‘look focused’ part. Abe really did. After a few seconds, Abe shook his head. “Yeah- you can, uh. Do whatever you want. Lemme know if you find anything, <em> anything, </em> that resembles tiny and red.”</p><p>“I’m gonna make you something to eat.”</p><p>“Mmhmm… sounds good…”</p><p>Yeah, he wasn’t paying attention. Wilford chuckled, patting his head before leaving the room.</p><p>He came back about twenty minutes later with a plateful of waffles. “It’s not coffee, but I hope it counts as something for you!”</p><p>Even though he was <em> very </em> preoccupied, Abe looked over and saw a pile of three burnt waffles with syrup flooding the whole thing. He couldn’t help but smile at that. “Thanks, bud. I think I’ll let it cool for a bit.”</p><p>“Alright, but I’m coming back to check on you later.” Wilford set the waffles on the table, in which Abe was still sitting in front of on the floor. He looked oddly childish, but Wilford didn’t say anything about it. “I’m sleepy.”</p><p>“Didn’t you just have a nap earlier?” Abe asked. “Right when I left you with my car?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Wilford said. “I’m still sleepy though.”</p><p>“Oh… are you feeling okay?”</p><p>He shrugged. “I’mma take a nap.”</p><p>Abe glanced at Wilford for a second. “You didn’t answer my question.”</p><p>“I’m okay,” Wilford said. “I’m just gonna go sleep in hope that it’ll make me <em> more </em> okay. ‘Cause… I’m <em> sleepy.</em>”</p><p>Abe didn’t look fully convinced, but he nodded. “Do you need me to do anything?”</p><p>Wilford shook his head. “Not really? Do whatever you wanna do, duck. Take a break and eat your waffles, though… mostly because I’m very proud of them and I want to know if you liked them.”</p><p>“I can take a break now,” Abe said. Wilford put a hand on his own chest.</p><p>“For me?” he asked in a funny tone. “You’re too kind, Abe~! Seriously though, take a break whenever you want. I am going to take a <em> nap. </em> Because I’m <em> sleepy! </em> And I <em> like </em> sleep!”</p><p>The two of them giggled a little bit. “Jeez, okay. Have fun trying to sleep.”</p><p>“I will!” As Wilford was going down to his room, he kept stopping every few seconds to try and listen if Abe would take a bite off a waffle. It was almost before he got to the door before Abe gave in. There was an audible small “<em>tsss! </em>” and a strained “Ow!” from Abe.</p><p>Wilford could hear a stifled laugh from Abe and another “Ow!” He rolled his eyes, snickering to himself, and he shut his door.</p><p>He practically fell into the bed, yawning softly. Why was Wilford suddenly so tired? </p><p>He curled up, rubbing at his eyes. There was a small itch around his stomach, but Wilford was already asleep before he’d do anything about it. Must be a pesky stitch poking out from his sweater.</p><p>The space around him was cold again… he was floating. He couldn’t see anything. It was dark.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. No Escape from Realityyyyyy~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There were soft whispers around Wilford. He felt like he should know what they were saying, but it seemed out of reach. </p><p>Where <em> was </em>he, anyways?</p><p> </p><p>“<em>You wanna talk about madness? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Where was <em>anything?</em> Wilford was getting dreadfully confused, and tried to call out, but his voice wasn’t the same. His words weren’t the same either.</p><p>What Wilford <em> meant </em> to say was “Hullo?” Simple, right?</p><p>A far cry from the “<em>Detective?!? </em> ” that slipped out. <em> What the…? </em></p><p>The hell is happening in Wilford’s head <em> now?? </em></p><p>Chuckles.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Are you having another ‘moment’, William? Did I come at a bad time? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford turned in a direction. <b><em>You</em></b><em> again??? What’s going on? Who</em><b><em> are </em></b><em>y</em><em>o</em><em>u</em><em>?</em> <em>Who the </em><b><em>fuck</em></b><em> is William?!?</em> <b><em>L</em></b><b><em>e</em></b><b><em>a</em></b><b><em>ve me alone!!!</em></b></p><p> </p><p>“<em>Hold on a moment! I didn’t </em> <b> <em>explain</em> </b> <em> anything yet! You want to know why I’m here? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford shook his head, indecisive. Why can’t he speak?? “<em>Mmmmmgh- n </em> <em> o- </em> <em> ? Yes-? Y </em> <em> es! At least </em> <em> show you </em> <em> rself </em> <em> , ple </em> <em> ase? </em> <em> ! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Oh, I’d absolutely </em> <b> <em>love</em> </b> <em> to, </em> ” the voice said. “<em>But I’m afraid I can’t. You’re always so worked up that I simply can’t. Maybe next time, when you’ve learned to relax.</em>”</p><p>There was an echoing gunshot, and Wilford crouched to the floor to cover his head. “<em>Maybe not when everything confuses me to the point where I </em> <b> <em>c</em> </b> <b> <em>a</em> </b> <b> <em>n’</em> </b> <b> <em>t?! </em> </b>”</p><p>There was a contemplating hum. “<em>Well, I can try… but I’m bad at keeping promises.</em>”</p><p>The tone of the voice <em> definitely </em> sounded like it. He seemed very bitter. Wilford just didn’t understand <em> why. </em></p><p> </p><p>“<em>For now… well, have fun, William.</em>”</p><p>“<em>Wa </em> <b> <em>i</em> </b> <b> <em>t</em> </b> <b> <em>-</em> </b> <em> ! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>He was alone. There was a loud bump like a body landing on the floor. Wilford hated to admit it to himself, but he felt <em> very </em> uncomfortable, with his hands fidgeting all over the bottom of his sweater.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Madness is </em> <b> <em>stealing</em> </b> <em> another man’s wife…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>That was definitely Abe’s voice. Wilford doesn’t remember Abe <em> ever </em> saying that, let alone hearing him so <em> angry. </em> Was he ever that angry before? Wilford couldn’t place it.</p><p>The whispers turned to screaming, and Wilford flinched, quietly beginning to cry. He didn’t like this place… not one bit.</p><p>A sharp itch was felt on his stomach underneath his sweater. Trying to wipe his tears to see clearly, his sweater’s pocket began glowing from pink to a bright red.</p><p>“<em>What…? </em>”</p><p>Sniffling, he tried to reach into his pocket. A small speck of red light was on Wilford’s palm, causing his entire hand to glow with it. “<em>Wh </em> <em> a </em> <em> t i </em> <em> s th </em> <em> is? </em>”</p><p>It was tiny, but he couldn’t quite make out what it was supposed to be.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Wi… …rd? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford blinked, and the red glow in his hand was gone.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Wil… …ord?? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>… Where… where was he?</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Wa… u… Wil… …rd! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford’s breathing shuddered, and he looked around in the darkness, whimpering. “<em>Hello…? Anyone?!? </em>”</p><p>He didn’t like this at <em> all. </em> The more Wilford began to panic, the more his eyes started welling up again. “<em>Where did you all go?!? Don’t leave me alone! I don’t want to play anymore! </em>”</p><p>He suddenly felt a strong grip around his arms. He screamed.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I’m ri… …ere! …t’s oka…! </em>”</p><p>“<em>…</em> <em>Detective? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford’s body was shaking, but it wasn’t entirely from himself. The grip on his arms was doing it, as if to get him back to his senses.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>C’mon, bu… wake… …p! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wake up? This whole thing is a dream? Well, why didn’t you say so?! Wilford shook his head, and began scrubbing at his eyes to wake himself up. If he had a watch that didn’t show any time, then he’d know this was a dream. That would have been <em> very </em> helpful earlier.</p><p>Once he opened his eyes, he wasn’t in darkness anymore. He was sitting on his bed, safe in his room. It was Abe that was holding onto his arms, looking into his eyes with complete concern. “Are you okay?”</p><p>There was a blank look on Wilford’s face, brushing off the fact that his tears were already dried up.</p><p>“... Well, that was the worst thing in the world,” Wilford muttered.</p><p>Abe sighed in relief. “What happened? I was sitting in the living room and I heard a bunch of screaming!”</p><p>He was screaming? Wilford didn’t remember that part.</p><p>“It was weird… I was me, but not me? I heard you, though… an’ someone else…” He frowned. Wilford brought his knees up to his chest so he’d give Abe room to sit on the bed with him. “It was really dark, and… I didn’t like it, at all. I was all by myself, but I kept on hearing this weird voice and <em> you. </em> You sounded very upset at me.”</p><p>“Really?” He sounded surprised. “What did I say?”</p><p>Wilford rubbed his head slowly. “I dunno, you were just… angry. More angry than I’d usually see you… I probably deserved it. Or you were tired. Or maybe not. I must have done something really bad to get you that angry.”</p><p>He sniffled. “I didn’t like it.”</p><p>“Well, hey, it was a dream,” Abe said, putting a hand on Wilford’s shoulder. “It’s over now, right?”</p><p>“… Right…” Wilford looked down at his knees, only to hug them. “I don’t think I’ve had dreams like that before. I always have the bad ones while it’s raining, I dunno why.”</p><p>Abe pursed his lips.</p><p>“Might be stress,” he said. “A lot of stuff is going on right now, with finding the diamond, going through the woods to see Dark, the car getting fixed, the <em> dog… </em> It’s a lot.”</p><p>“Hey, don’t blame Charlotte! She’s a good girl!”</p><p>“I know she is,” Abe soothed. “She just scares me.”</p><p>Wilford snickered a bit.</p><p>“But anyway,” Abe said. “I’m done with work now, and… you’re okay, right? You need anything to eat, or…?”</p><p>After a few seconds of pondering for an answer, Wilford shook his head. “I’m not hungry.”</p><p>“Want a drink?” Abe asked.</p><p>“No, thanks.”</p><p>Patting his own lap, Abe let out a small sigh. “Okay… So, you’re… You’re okay? I don’t wanna leave you on edge all night.”</p><p>Wilford let out a “<em>Heh! </em>” and kept hugging his knees. “I… don’t know, really. I felt really lonely in that dream, so… Do you mind staying in here for a bit? That’s something to get the edge off, right?”</p><p>“I don’t mind.” He jumped a little bit when Wilford leaned against him, which caused Wilford to jump, too.</p><p>“Sorry-!”</p><p>“It’s fine-”</p><p>“I’m alright-”</p><p>Seemed like they were both on edge. Wilford’s hug around his knees tightened, and Abe looked over at Wilford’s desk. There was a pile of CD cases, all labeled “Wilford’s mix”, from volume 1 to 5. </p><p>He stood up and grabbed one, putting it in the CD player on the dresser. Then he realized it wasn’t plugged in and spent a good two minutes trying to find a wall outlet. Wilford giggled quietly.</p><p>“Which volume are you in the mood for?” Abe asked, setting each CD case down in front of Wilford’s feet.</p><p>Wilford looked through every case, reading through the multiple homemade lists on the back of every one. He then closed his eyes while taking a deep breath. “Eenie meenie miney mo…”</p><p>Abe chuckled, watching Wilford blindly point each and every case with his finger to choose which one would be a good CD to play. “If he hollers, let him know, my mom says, ‘oh <em> my, </em> you!’”</p><p>“… That’s not how you do it-”</p><p>“Shhhhh!”</p><p>“You cheated with that second to last word-”</p><p>“Shush, I got the fourth one!” Wilford insisted, pointing at the fourth case almost vigorously. “Now put it in!”</p><p>Abe fluffed Wilford’s hair until he got up with the case, and put the CD in the player. “A Horse With No Name” began playing, and Wilford was immediately at ease.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>On the first part of the journey, </em></p><p><em>  I was looking at all the life…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>It was a softer song than what he normally listened to, but right now, rambunctious wasn’t the best ‘mood’. It made Wilford feel better though, and that’s what mattered to Abe at that moment. Wilford had that tiny sort of smile that was mostly hidden under the mustache, but Abe could tell he was smiling anyways, because his eyes seemed to scrunch up a little bit.</p><p>He’s been living with Wilford for way too long to notice all of that apparently. Eh.</p><p>After another song or two, Wilford got up from the bed and dug through his desk. “Rubix cube, rubix cube, rubix cube…”</p><p>He pulled out a lot of rubber bands and bent paper clips. Eventually he got tired of rummaging and pulled out the entire drawer, dumping its contents onto the top of the desk.</p><p>“This has to be easier than any I Spy book,” Wilford said. “I need me a fidget.”</p><p>This had Abe chuckle. It was a more… direct way to solve a problem, sure, but this was Wilford. He found the cube soon after, and plopped back on the bed with a wide grin.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0029"><h2>29. Yeah We Gay, Keep Scrolling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Abe watched Wilford fidget all over the cube, making simple shapes like X’s and O’s. It didn’t look like Wilford wanted to solve getting all of the colors, it just looked like he was making little puzzles.</p><p>“You having fun over there?”</p><p>Wilford nodded faintly, humming. He scratched at the back of his neck absently, and Abe frowned. “What’s that?”</p><p>“What’s what?”</p><p>“The thing on your neck, Wilford. Did you bump it or something?”</p><p>“No…?” Wilford sounded genuinely confused. “Why are you asking?”</p><p>Abe’s frown deepened. “It’s just… you got a weird bump on there.” He reached over to pick at it, and Wilford jumped.</p><p>“Hey! Don’t touch that!”</p><p>“Why-” Abe continued to pick it off, and Wilford tried to smack at his hand. “Got it. Looked like it came from a horsefly, those things suck.”</p><p>“Abe, I needed that-!” Wlford exclaimed.</p><p>“Okay?” Abe didn’t look like he understood.</p><p>“It was for every time I’d get all sucky in the woods!” Wilford said. “They told me not to scratch it, and you just went ahead and took it off and-”</p><p>“Who’s ‘they’?” Abe asked.</p><p>“Dark, you <em>ding-dong! </em>”</p><p>Abe stared at him. <em> … How’d they do THAT? </em></p><p><em> I dunno? </em> Wilford gave a  shrug. <em> Magic. Dark kinda just gave it to me so I’d be better at going through the woods. </em></p><p>What Abe is about to ask Wilford is… strange.</p><p>“Was it a hickey?” NO HESITATION, WHATSOEVER.</p><p>“ABE WHAT THE FUCK?!?” Wilford looked shocked, and had turned scarlet. He smacked Abe’s arm <em> hard. </em> “YOU THINK- THEIR MOUTH- YOU THINK THEY- NOOOOOOOOO. NO.”</p><p>Something resembling dying whale noises.</p><p>“... Did you <em> want </em>it to be a hickey?” His expression was serious, but there was some teasing in his voice.</p><p>“I- um… SHUT UP!!!” Another smack on Abe’s arm, and this time, Abe almost had tears building up in his eyes.</p><p>“So you <em> did? </em>” he asked, hoarsely. A tiny smirk.</p><p>Distressed squawking. “THAT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, DICK-”</p><p>“Okay, okay, okay…” Abe attempted to put a hand on Wilford’s shoulder, but there was a fussy punch.</p><p>“I MEAN SO WHAT, I’M NOT ALLOWED TO BE ATTRACTED TO THEM??? THEY’RE VERY HANDSOME AND BEAUTIFUL AND NICE-”</p><p>“I <em> know </em> , Wilford. It was a <em> joke </em>. Please, stop hitting me.”</p><p>“NO!” Another punch right in Abe’s palm, and he struggled not to let out any pained noises.</p><p>
  <em> This is abuse- </em>
</p><p>Unholy screeching. Seemed Abe had struck a nerve. Wilford was tugging at the back of his sweater to hide his face. “WHY DID YOU HAVE TO ASK IF IT WAS A HICKEY???? I EXPECTED YOU TO BE ALL LIKE ‘WHY’D THEY GIVE YOU THAT BIG FUCKING SCRATCH ON YOUR NECK? OH, I’LL KILL THEM IF THEY THINK THEY CAN HURT YOU LIKE THAT, THAT THING-OF-A-BITCH!’”</p><p>Abe tried to hold in a chuckle. “I thought it’d be funny. If they <em> did </em>hurt you, though-”</p><p>Wilford’s face was beet red. “I KNOW!” A loud huff, and Wilford crossed his arms. “I know.”</p><p>“… Do you wanna give <em> them </em>a hickey?” Abe asked, with a somewhat joking tone.</p><p>Wilford let out a very long sigh. “Why, do <em> you? </em>”</p><p>… A quiet chuckle. Wilford’s head shot up from underneath his sweater. “<em>WHAT? </em>”</p><p>“So you <em> do? </em>”</p><p>“SHUT UP-” He was completely red again. Abe blocked a quick punch this time, and Wilford hid his face in his white shirt. “I hate saying it, but I hate you sometimes, Abe…”</p><p>“Nah. Who’d feed you, then?”</p><p>“Mad Mike.” The answer was very flat.</p><p>Abe made a mocking sneer. “I don’t know how that guy’s not in jail yet.”</p><p>“Because I’m the one buying all his crack.”</p><p>“That’s not funny.”</p><p>“It is if you think hard enough,” Wilford mumbled, with his arms crossed again. Abe cracked a smile.</p><p>“He <em> does </em>make some good ice cream, though.”</p><p>“Oh, you just like his stupid rocky road,” Wilford said.</p><p>“Once he realized I was serious about the ‘No cocaine instead of marshmallows, please, I mean it’,” Abe started. “I guess he <em> does </em> take his job seriously sometimes.”</p><p>“You can’t blame him,” Wilford muttered. “The kid’s in his twenties.”</p><p>“Wilford, you better not get any ideas again- I mean it-”</p><p>“What ideas?” Wilford asked. “I don’t have <em> any </em> idea what you’re talking about, I don’t get <em> any </em> ideas.”</p><p>“That old pinstripe suit in your closet says otherwise.”</p><p>“Come on, I have plans for that suit!” Wilford’s head poked out. “I just saw it one day, and I went, ‘Oh, I want that suit for the future!’ And then I stole it ‘cause it was very expensive.”</p><p>Abe gave him The Look.</p><p>“Honest!”</p><p>One of Abe’s brows tilted up, deepening The Look in ‘I can smell your lies from here’.</p><p>“I’m gonna wear that suit for a very special occasion one day, Abe,” Wilford said sagely. “I dunno what it’d be for, but I <em> know </em> it’s gonna be something very special and nice.”</p><p>“… If you say so.”</p><p>There was a long pause between them both, supposedly ending this… <em> wild </em> conversation.</p><p>Once Wilford remembered how it started, his face felt warm. Yes, it was obvious that he really liked Dark, how could it not be?</p><p>
  <em> They’re a dick!</em>
</p><p>Wilford’s face sunk back into his sweater, immediately feeling bad over what he just thought. Dark isn’t <em> that </em> bad…</p><p>Abe tilted his head. …<em> Who’s a dick? </em></p><p>
  <em> I dunno. Not Dark. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Oh. Cool…</em>
</p><p>
  <em> You’re not a dick either. </em>
</p><p>Wilford knew Abe would like hearing that. He could just tell.</p><p>The problem was, Wilford just realized, he knew Abe liked him. Probably even more than Wilford liked Abe. Sure, there were a few little kisses, but ever since Wilford saw Dark, he could feel his heart going in multiple directions for multiple reasons he couldn’t really understand. Which was strange, because Wilford has had many partners throughout the years, even when Abe knew about it.</p><p>Abe had always been there for him. But this was new. Wilford barely knows anything about Dark, but something about them just draws him in.</p><p>
  <em> Abe? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yeah? </em>
</p><p>After a small pause, Wilford took a deep breath. “It’s okay if I like Dark, right?”</p><p>
  <em> … Yeah. </em>
</p><p>“Do you still not like them?” Wilford asked.</p><p>Abe hesitated. “… I like <em> you</em><em>,</em>” he pointed out. “And if you like them, then I guess I have to like them, too.”</p><p>“No- I don’t want this to be a ‘if Wilford likes it, I like it too’ thing…!” Wilford said. “I am <em> genuinely </em> asking. I like big colorful action movies, and you don’t. I like ladies, gentlemen, configurations of being, and you like gentlemen. Those aren’t ‘if I like it, you like it’ things… Do you like Dark, or no? Be honest?”</p><p>“I don’t… know them well enough. But they don’t seem to be bad… besides the diamond. I want you to be happy.” The tone was far softer.</p><p>“It’s a yes or no answer.”</p><p>After a small hesitated pause, Abe shook his head. “I dunno. I mean… back in the woods where we were trying to move my car, we talked for a bit, and… that was it. Nothing huge happened, but it just ended up with my dislike for them to… decrease, slightly. So… I dunno if I still don’t like them. Don’t really know what to tell you.”</p><p>Wilford sighed through his nose quietly. “Alright. I wanted to know.”</p><p>“Sorry, bud,” Abe replied, genuinely sounding sorry.</p><p>“Nothing to be sorry about,” Wilford said. “I was curious.”</p><p>It was quiet for a minute.</p><p>
  <em> Wilford? </em>
</p><p><em>Hmm?</em> Wilford’s internal tone was surprisingly sad.</p><p>
  <em> … Never mind. </em>
</p><p>Stuck between a rock and a hard place. Abe sighed. “I’m… gonna go do paperwork. Are you okay by yourself for now?”</p><p>“I can come out with you,” Wilford replied.</p><p>“<em>No</em><em>-</em> no. Thank you.” Abe’s face was suddenly warm from out of nowhere. “I’ve been in here with you for a while, I think we both need some… alone time, don’t you think?”</p><p>“… Sure?” Wilford blinked. Abe was being weird. He wasn’t normally this articulate. “Are you alright, duck?”</p><p>“Why wouldn’t I be?” Abe asked, getting up from the bed. “We still have to find that diamond, right? No time to waste than just… sitting here, listening to old music with an unsolved rubik’s cube!”</p><p>Wilford watched Abe fumble along to the door. He couldn’t seem to get out of the room fast enough.</p><p>
  <em> Abe? </em>
</p><p>“Yeah?” He paused at the door with a strained grin.</p><p>
  <em> … Never mind. </em>
</p><p>Abe started chuckling, and his hands stumbled all over the doorknob. “Okaycoolit’salwaysgreathangingoutwithyoubuddycomeoutifyouneedanythinghahahabye!”</p><p>He was gone before Wilford could reply, and he stared at the door, confused.</p><p>… Was it something he said?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. TELL HIM YOU DUMBASS</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Abe was sitting at the kitchen table with multiple mugs full of coffee around him, with his pen making many many many many <em> many </em> tiny dots all over his notepad for how much he’s been fiddling with it.</p><p>It’s very late. Like, 1 in the morning late. He couldn’t muster up the energy to go to bed, much less try to fall asleep. His head was too full. His leg was bouncing so many times against a beam holding in between his chair legs, there would be an indent marking in it.</p><p>He felt like such an idiot. He was <em> such </em> an <em> idiot. </em> If he could, he’d be able to retreat into his usual routine where he’d berate himself, with everything going black and white, with multiple swooping camera shots to show how dumb he is. But he can’t. His head is too full.</p><p>
  <em> Idiot. </em>
</p><p>Sure, Abe, it’s <em> fine. </em> Clearly freak out after you <em> almost </em> told this wack you like him, and pretend it’s nothing as you leave his room. It’s <em> fine! </em> He <em> obviously </em> knows, you pining dumbass. But why on earth would he like <em> you? </em> He likes <em> Dark. </em> Dark’s <em> mysterious. </em>Dark’s fucking gorgeous, you’re just the guy that houses him.</p><p>… Wilford knows you like him, right?</p><p>
  <em> Right??? </em>
</p><p>… <em> Idiot. </em></p><p>Groaning, Abe rubbed his face with his hands. Why did he have to leave like nothing strange happened??? Abe already came out to Wilford <em> days </em> ago, <em> after they’d kissed. TWICE! </em></p><p>Abe buried his head in his hands, muffling his screeches.</p><p>Why didn’t he say anything? Why’d he tell Wilford he was okay with him liking Dark?!? Well- he <em> did, </em> but guess what! That was a <em> lie! </em></p><p>
  <em> What the hell was wrong with him?!? </em>
</p><p>More muffled screeches.</p><p>From Wilford’s room, Abe could hear an <em> angrily </em> fitting song to this situation. “Can’t Stop This Feeling” from REO Speedwagon. <em> Great. </em></p><p>Of all the discs Wilford had to choose, why did it have to be the one with <em> most </em> of his favorite romantic songs???</p><p>He stabbed the pen viciously into the notepad. The pen broke, and ink spurt all over the table. Fucking- great.</p><p>All of this over a fucking <em> feeling. </em></p><p>“Abe, you okay out there? You sound like a dying whale.”</p><p>“I’m <em> fine.</em>”</p><p>Abe had to admit, though… “Can’t Stop This Feeling” is a good song.</p><p>“If you say so…” The volume increased immediately after Wilford replied, and Abe smacked his head against the table.</p><p>God<em> dammit, </em> he <em> does </em> know.</p><p>… <em> RIGHT??? </em></p><p> </p><p>“<em>What started out as friendship has grown stronger, </em></p><p><em> I only wish I had the strength to let it show.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Did REO Speedwagon fucking <em> predict </em> Abe’s feelings?! Was he just reading into this…? Or did Wilford just <em> really </em>want to listen to this particular song, because it’s a jam?!</p><p>Abe’s head bumped against the table multiple times.</p><p>“Abe?”</p><p>Abe’s head shot up, in surprise at how close Wilford sounded. “<em>What? </em>”</p><p>Once Abe saw Wilford, he wasn’t in his pink sweater anymore. It was just his white shirt.</p><p>… Why is Abe’s neck so sweaty?</p><p>“What the hell are you doing out here?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“... Nothing!”</p><p>“Can ‘nothing’ be a little quieter, please?”</p><p>Oh, <em> GOD. CAN HE BE ANY MORE OBVIOUS THAT HE KNOWS. </em></p><p>“Yeah- sorry,” Abe said, clearing his throat. “I’m just… <em> very </em> busy.”</p><p>“I can see that,” Wilford replied. “You have ink on your face.”</p><p>“… Yeah. Thanks.”</p><p>… If he <em> knew </em> knew, then he wouldn’t be playing that song. Wilford, while an asshat sometimes, wasn’t cruel. Not intentionally, anyways.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I tell myself that I can’t hold out forever. </em></p><p>
  <em> I said there is no reason for my fear. </em>
</p><p><em> ‘Cause I feel so secure when we’re together…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>That- fucking- <em> amazing </em> song. If this song was a person, Abe could strangle it…</p><p>Wilford smiled quietly. “You hungry? You get cranky when you’re hungry.”</p><p>“I’m fine,” Abe said. “I had your waffles earlier, remember?”</p><p>“Yeah, but… you’ve been acting kind of funny today. Are you feeling okay?”</p><p>Oh no- oh shit-</p><p>“I’m okay.” Good save. “How are you?” FUCK.</p><p>Wilford doesn’t seem to notice Abe struggling… or maybe he is, and he’s holding it back. “I’m alright. Earlier, I wanted to come out with you because the nightmare made me lonely and such, but I feel more better than I thought, so thank you for keeping me company.”</p><p>Why is he so fucking cute <em>grateful-</em></p><p>“Not a problem.” Abe weakly gave Wilford a thumbs up. How cliche, showing how smooth he is. “Anytime, Wilford.”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>AND I CAN’T FIGHT THIS FEELING ANYMOOOOORE! </em></p><p><em> I’VE FORGOTTEN WHAT I STARTED FIGHTIN’ FOOOOOOOOR! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Both Abe and Wilford jumped at how loud the chorus was. Wilford struggled to keep a straight face. “SORRY! I’LL GO TURN IT DOWN!”</p><p>“WHAT?” Abe knew what Wilford said.</p><p>“I’LL GO TURN IT DOWN, DUCK!” Wilford’s straight face broke as soon as he raced down to his room, and Abe thought he could hear a cackle.</p><p>While Wilford was gone, Abe made <em> multiple </em> gestures to himself in a reflection of a coffee mug. Gestures like, “What the hell is wrong with you? Thumbs up is Wilford’s thing! How smooth ARE you?! The song wasn’t even that loud, why pretend you’re deaf?! Fucking <em>idiot! </em>”</p><p>Wilford was peeking out at him from behind the corner of the wall, frowning. Abe didn’t notice. Wilford made his feet stomp on the floor like a rising volume that he’d be coming back from his room, and Abe stopped with the gestures as soon as Wilford popped out from behind the corner with a big smile. Something is wrong.</p><p><em> Should he bring it up? </em> Wilford wondered. Did Abe want him to say something? </p><p>“Uh…”</p><p>“Uh…”</p><p>Both of them were flailing awkwardly, at least internally.</p><p>“Any luck with the work?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“No, haven’t found anything, nothing at all-” Abe said it kind of quickly. “What about you? You found- find anything that’s even resembling of- tiny and/or red shiny?”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I mean… in my dream, I have. Does that count?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Oh, okay… I can ask Dark when I see ‘em again, if you want.”</p><p>Abe almost gagged. Wilford opened his mouth, but Abe put up a hand. “Uh-huh. Sure. Go ahead. Ask ‘em. Ask them if they still fucking <em> have </em> the diamond, why don’t you.”</p><p>He stood up. “I’m going to bed.”</p><p>“You still have ink on you-”</p><p>“I could care less,” Abe mumbled. “You have fun with <em> Dark. </em>G’night.” </p><p>Wilford grabbed his arm before Abe could turn away. The detective flinched. Wilford’s face was stern, but he looked calm and worried at the same time. “Are you okay? And be <em> honest </em>this time, duck. Please.”</p><p>“<em>Don’t </em> fucking call me that,” Abe snapped, bringing his sleeve up to his face in attempt to brush ink off. Wilford’s grip loosened.</p><p>“I don’t want you to be upset all night,” he said. “What’s wrong? Are you mad at me?”</p><p>“Everything’s <b><em>fine!</em></b> Stop acting all innocent and hurt, Wilford, you’re not a fucking<b><em> dog! </em></b>”</p><p>Wilford let go entirely, indeed looking innocent and, yes, hurt. It didn’t help that his eyes were so puppy-ish, too. “I… okay. I don’t know what made you so pissed off today, I don’t know if it’s my fault, but whatever. Be mad. You’re allowed to. Just don’t take it out on me if you won’t even tell me what’s wrong.”</p><p>Of course he wouldn’t take it out on Wilford. Abe just experimented, and it felt fucking <em> awful. </em></p><p>“Goodnight.” Abe watched Wilford walk away, and there was a sound that seemed suspiciously like a sniffle.</p><p>Abe wasn’t sure why, but he felt like he got stung. By a really big hornet out for blood from the heart. Or literally <em> anywhere, </em> but more specifically the heart.</p><p>Damn it.</p><p>Abe took a deep breath and sighed. He’s sleeping on the couch tonight.</p><p>He didn’t really notice it, but the music was turned off completely from Wilford’s room.</p><p>The apartment was far too quiet without it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. And How Does That Make You Feel?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Quick note!! I've slowed down updating chapters because we're still in the thick of writing this. We're a bit stuck on writing the 37th chapter, but hopefully we'll get there!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford strolled right up to the rock fence that led to the woods. He poked around the back of his neck, feeling for the scar. A tiny bump, and Wilford sighed with a tiny smile. It’s still there, mostly, thank goodness.</p><p>He was not in the mood to feel any worse than he already did.</p><p>“Okay…”</p><p>This is so weird. Wilford has never gone into the woods by himself before, let alone actually letting himself do it when he’s awake. And sneaking out, too… what was he, fifteen?</p><p>He took a deep breath, walking in.</p><p>It was weirder going through the woods in the dark than during the day. It was far less foggy at night. Waaaay less spooky, too.</p><p>Was that some of Charlotte’s fur hanging on a tree, or just some Spanish Moss? Maybe a mix of both? Charlotte must really need a bath if her fur looks like moss… Wilford would have to add it to the list of things he needs to ask Dark.</p><p>Of all the times he’d remember, Wilford always liked walking through the woods. Not these woods specifically, obviously, but he always liked imagining what it would be like to be some sort of creature who would live in the forests. Maybe a creature would be living like Dark, away from society but is spotted around if they absolutely need to be out and about. </p><p>He giggled softly at the thought.</p><p>Soon enough, when there was light in the sky, Wilford heard quiet barking, which quickly turned into loud barking. Here she comes…</p><p>Wilford spread his arms out wide, preparing to be toppled over by Charlotte.</p><p>Loud panting. <b> <em>Hi, Pink Funny Man!</em> </b></p><p>He looked up to see Charlotte politely sitting in front of him. He smiled weakly, reaching up to pat at her nose. <em> Hi there, pretty girly. </em></p><p>He could hear her tail thump all over the ground. Her ears were drooping, and she lowered her head to him. <b> <em>You look sad.</em> </b></p><p>“My friend’s mad at me.”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Oh. He’s stupid.</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford couldn’t help but wheeze at that. “That’s not very nice, sweetie.”</p><p>It’s true, sometimes. Charlotte’s ears drooped even more. <b> <em>Are you sad because Grumpy Man is stupid?</em> </b></p><p>“A little,” Wilford said. “I’m hoping your Parent will help me with it.”</p><p>A tail wag. <b> <em>Parent would love to! I’ll take you right now!</em> </b></p><p>Charlotte nuzzled her snout against Wilford’s legs, and he held onto her as she lifted her head up. She briskly trotted back the way she came, and soon, they were back at the log cabin.</p><p>It was suddenly daytime… though Wilford brushed it off. He could see Dark was gardening, in a sundress. There was some dirt on her cheek. Once Charlotte approached her, Wilford was waving ‘hello’ until Dark could notice him. She must have seen the shadow or something, because she squinted up and suddenly smiled. “<b>Will!</b>”</p><p>“Dark!” Wilford smiled back at her, widely.</p><p>“<b>I wasn’t expecting you today, it’s so nice to see you!</b>”</p><p><b> <em>Pink Funny Man’s sad. Grumpy Man is stupid.</em> </b> Charlotte licked her nose.</p><p>Dark blinked, with a little frown. “<b>Oh…?</b>” She glanced up at Wilford. “<b>Is everything okay?</b>”</p><p>“… No, not really,” Wilford muttered begrudgingly. Dark got up to her feet, brushing dirt off her black dress. She already looked concerned.</p><p>“<b>Come inside,</b>” she said. “<b>I needed a break anyways.</b>”</p><p>“But I… oh, alright…” Wilford slid off of Charlotte, and shuffled inside. Charlotte whined quietly. <b> <em>I hope you feel better, Pink Funny Man… </em> </b></p><p>
  <em> Yeah, me too. </em>
</p><p>Dark had pulled up some chairs, and left one open for him. “<b>Sit.</b>”</p><p>He plopped down without ceremony, and Charlotte squeezed through the door to curl up on her bed. “<b>Now, what’s wrong…?</b>”</p><p>Wilford lied back against the chair, sighing. “Uhm… I dunno… one minute, things seemed to be going well, and then Abe’s acting all funny and getting ink all over his face, and then I’m listening to REO Speedwagon and then he’s yelling at me for being a dog-”</p><p>“<b>Whoa, whoa, whoa- what?</b>”</p><p>Wilford sucked in a breath through his teeth. “I know it’s a lot- I’m very sorry. Everything is just… Abe wasn’t so nice earlier, and I wanted to know if you could let me talk about it to let it out.”</p><p>“<b>Of course I will… here.</b>”</p><p>Wilford watched Dark stand up and pulled out a blanket from underneath her bed, only to put it on top of it. “<b>Come lay down here. I know that me being a therapist was a joke, but… let’s do it at least </b> <b> <em>one</em> </b> <b> more time so that this isn’t my sole purpose in this fanfic.</b>”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>”</p><p>Crazy authors.</p><p>Once he got on the bed, Wilford looked around with a frown. “O… kay… where should I begin?”</p><p>“<b>How about at the beginning?</b>” Dark asked, not unkindly.</p><p>Simple enough.</p><p>“Well… yesterday, Abe was doing his detectively stuff, and I made him waffles. But I was tired, so I took a nap… and I had a nightmare. I was all by myself, and I could hear Abe being very upset with me. Abe woke me up, and stayed in my room until I felt better.”</p><p>“<b>Was the nightmare Abe the reason you’re upset?</b>” Dark asked. Wilford tried with all his might not to imagine her with glasses and a notepad.</p><p>“No, he was <em> much </em> better when he woke me up,” Wilford said. “Since I was feeling alone after the dream, he kept me company without wondering why he’d be so upset with me. And <em> then, </em> he picked most of the scar you gave me off my neck! I could tell he’d be worried about it because he’s protective-like mad, so I kinda just… expected him to be all worried over me getting hurt from you because he doesn’t like you and such… no offense.”</p><p>“<b>None taken,</b>” Dark replied. She noticed Wilford’s fingers fidgeting. He was trying to peek out of the window from the bed. “<b>What’s wrong?</b>”</p><p>Wilford let out a small chuckle. “Now we’re getting to the part I’m nervous to tell you.”</p><p>“<b>Why?</b>” </p><p>“He, uh… he asked if it was a…” He blushed a little. “A hickey.”</p><p>Dark blinked. “<b>A what?</b>”</p><p>Wilford kept his mouth shut. Even his internal voice sounded small. <em> A hickey... </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>Oh- oh. Oh… </em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford tried not to look at her. Dark cleared her throat. “<b>And what did you tell him, then?</b>”</p><p>“That it wasn’t!” Wilford exclaimed. “He told me he was joking, but he <em>sounded</em> serious!”</p><p>Now they were getting somewhere. “<b>What else?</b>”</p><p>“I don’t know if I can even tell you,” Wilford said. “You probably don’t even know…”</p><p>“<b>Well, I </b> <b> <em>won’t </em> </b> <b>know if you don’t tell me, Will.</b>” Sometimes, Dark’s voice would give Wilford goosebumps, no matter what it sounded like. This was one of those times.</p><p>“I…” He was blushing again. “I kinda admitted to Abe that uh… I like you more than a friend…”</p><p>Wilford couldn’t see it, but Dark was blushing as well. “<b>Well, Will… I like you too.</b>”</p><p>“Are you sure??” Wilford asked. “Because I don’t remember all the times we’ve been together to know whether you actually liked my company or not. I can get insufferable!”</p><p>“<b>I find your company quite refreshing,</b>” she replied after a small laugh. “<b>But go on, what happened next?</b>”</p><p>“I- um…” Wilford looked down at his fingers, seeing them all trembling. He’s confessed to multiple people in the past, why is Dark any different???</p><p>She was smiling, very softly. “<b>Well?</b>”</p><p>“I asked Abe if it’s okay that I like you,” Wilford started. “And he started acting all funny.”</p><p>“<b>Good funny, or bad funny?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>Wilford made a so-so gesture with his hand. “I call it ‘Eh?’ funny. He was fumbling all over and left my room. I was blasting a song, and I could hear him screaming, so I checked if he was okay. Turns out the song was louder than we wanted it to be, so once I came back after I turned it down, Abe kept talking to himself, all upset.”</p><p>“<b>Did he see you come back?</b>” Dark asked. She whispered a quiet “<b>Hi</b>” to Charlotte as she nuzzled up next to her.</p><p>“I made little noises so he’d <em> hear </em> me coming back,” Wilford said. “He didn’t notice the first time.</p><p>His frown deepened. “Then he got more upset once I mentioned you. He yelled at me and I went to bed.”</p><p>Ohhhhhh… oh.</p><p>She understood now.</p><p>“<b>Will?</b>”</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>“<b>Did it occur to you that he might be jealous?</b>” She sounded greatly amused, which caused Wilford to snort and sit up straight.</p><p>“<em>What? </em>”</p><p>Dark held in a snicker. “<b>Well, I just figured- it awfully sounds like he must be jealous over something. Right?</b>”</p><p>“But what’s there to be jealous <em> of? </em>Wouldn’t he tell me?” Wilford’s blush grew all around his cheeks.</p><p>Dark had a wide, sly smile. She leaned over and took Wilford’s hand. “<b>Wilford. Abe </b> <b> <em>likes </em> </b> <b>you.</b>”</p><p>With a blink, Wilford slowly made Dark let go of his hand. “I know that- I mean- I <em> think… </em> I…? Knew? I kind of figured… I am so confused…”</p><p>Wilford felt like he could curl up in a ball, all for feeling confused. So many feelings are happening, so he might as well just let them sit in him for a long time, right? Hopefully not die from it.</p><p>“I kind of knew,” he said after a moment of silence. “I don’t remember entirely what happened, but I remember he came out that he likes gentlemen to me a few days ago, so… I probably should have been more- I dunno. Observant?”</p><p>“<b>Maybe. The two of you have lived together for a really long time, right? He probably felt comfortable enough telling you because he has feelings for you.</b>”</p><p>“Not really. He came out to me a day after we stayed up really late an’ he kissed me.”</p><p>“<b>… Will.</b>” She gave him A Look now.</p><p>“That’s all I remember!” Wilford exclaimed. “I thought that was his way of saying ‘Hey, I like boys, hope you don’t kill me,’ cuz we were both REALLY tired and he might not have thought of a different-”</p><p>“<b><em>Will! </em> </b>”</p><p>“What?!”</p><p>“<b><em>Relax! </em> </b> ” Dark was holding his hand again. “<b>You’re overthinking it. Take a second to calm down.</b>”</p><p>Wilford didn’t notice it, but his grip on Dark’s hand was really tight. She didn’t look like she was bothered by it, though.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Weird, how he’s still this nervous about people he likes… Why does this remind me of before? </em>
</p><p><b> <em>Please</em> </b> <em> don’t remind me… </em></p><p>
  <em> Too late. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Charlotte rested her muzzle on Wilford’s legs, whining softly. He absently pat at her head with his free hand.</p><p>Dark felt his grip on her hand loosening. “<b>Feeling better?</b>”</p><p>She gave Wilford a second to ponder. “Not really. But I am relaxed now, if that helps.”</p><p>“<b>It does, don’t worry,</b>” she replied.</p><p>“What am I supposed to do?” Wilford asked. “I don’t remember this ever happening to me. I like to think it has? But… it’s okay that I like you, right?”</p><p>He let go of Dark’s hand completely, letting her rest it on her lap. She had an almost understanding look on her face.</p><p>“<b>Of course it is,</b>” she said. “<b>To be honest, I sort of already knew.</b>”</p><p>Wilford lied back, groaning. <em> Why didn’t you say something?!?!?!?!?!?!?! </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>If that’s how you feel, imagine how he feels.</em> </b>
</p><p>“<b>And- I know you don’t remember it, but I kissed your hand a while ago,</b>” Dark said out loud, causing Wilford to groan louder. She smiled softly. “<b>If it makes you feel any better, you </b> <b> <em>did</em> </b> <b> forget about it.</b>”</p><p>“No it doesn’t!” Wilford exclaimed. “I had <em>no idea</em> you did that! If you knew I liked you, you could have done something I’d actually remember! That hand kiss thing must have done so little if you wanted to tell me you knew! I <em> know </em> I’m a hopeless romantic, you gotta tell me these things, Dark!”</p><p>“<b>I just did, Wilford,</b>” Dark said, calmly. “<b>I didn’t want to do anything to make you uncomfortable.</b>”</p><p>“I’m uncomf right now,” Wilford mumbled. “My head feels heavy.”</p><p>“<b>Well, </b> <b> <em>again,</em> </b> <b> Wilford,</b>” Dark started. “<b>If this is how </b> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <b> feel, imagine how </b> <b> <em>Abe</em> </b> <b> feels right now.</b>”</p><p>He sighed loudly, plopping down on the bed again. Charlotte’s ears pricked, and she nuzzled Wilford’s hand for more pats. It was just a lazy one, which made Charlotte huff.</p><p>“Sorry, girly,” Wilford said, looking at the ceiling. “Wilfy’s not feeling very pat happy.”</p><p>Charlotte huffed again, trying to lick his whole hand. He chuckled.</p><p>“<b>Honestly, Wilford,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I think Abe would be very happy if you told him how </b> <b> <em>you’d</em> </b> <b> feel about this. You’ve been through this kind of thing before, right?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I don’t remember.”</p><p>“<b>I already knew you were going to say that,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>I just wanted to make sure.</b>”</p><p>She spotted a small piece of paper in Wilford’s jean pocket. “<b>What’s that for?</b>”</p><p>Wilford turned to look at her. “Hmm?”</p><p>“<b>The paper.</b>” She pointed to it. Wilford sat up again, and dug his hand into his pocket to pull the paper out. It’s his list of things he’d need to ask Dark, other than her being his love therapist.</p><p>“Oh!” His face suddenly perked from upset and embarrassed to curious and happy in a split second. “I almost forgot about this! You know how we met over that tiny diamond?”</p><p>“<b>Yes. What about it?</b>”</p><p>“Abe is still wondering if you could give it back,” Wilford answered with a tone in his voice like he was never upset. “We both kinda concluded that you stole it, so… please?”</p><p>Dark’s smile faded slightly. “<b>… I hate to tell you this, Will, but I don’t have it anymore. </b> <b> <em>You </em> </b> <b>do.</b>”</p><p>Wilford blinked. “What? What do you mean?”</p><p>“<b>Abe didn’t tell you he came over?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“No,” Wilford shook his head. “He said something about coffee and he left.”</p><p> </p><p><em> I hate to agree with </em> <b> <em>him</em> </b> <em> for once, but… wow, the detective is an idiot. </em></p><p>
  <em> Just hearing you say that makes me want to punch something. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Please, do not. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark pursed her lips. “<b>Well… he came over to ask about the diamond, but we both found that it was gone.</b>”</p><p>It explains why he came over and ruined Wilford’s room that day…</p><p>“<b>And, it had only disappeared </b><b><em>right after </em></b><b>you investigated my bathroom… on the first day you went to my cabin…</b>” She cleared her throat. “<b>As Abe and I were arguing…</b>”</p><p>“Why?” The way Wilford asked that sounded very innocent somehow.</p><p>“<b>He was just asking why I took the diamond,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I knew I had to do something to make sure he wouldn’t know, so… we sort of fought until he took you outside so you’d leave.</b>”</p><p>Wilford had a gentle look. “Oh… hey, Dark? Why’d you take the diamond in the first place? For Abe’s sake?”</p><p>“<b>… I can’t tell you. I’m sorry.</b>” She wrung her hands. “<b>Just know, it used to belong to me.</b>”</p><p>“Really??” Wilford blinked, and he sat on his knees. “Why didn’t you say so? Did somebody steal it just for the museum?”</p><p>“<b>You </b> <b> <em>could</em> </b> <b> say that…</b>” Dark itched her collarbone. “<b>Let’s just say it was </b> <b> <em>passed down</em> </b> <b> to me. I wanted to keep it safe, but… I guess that’s not going to happen, now.</b>”</p><p>“Aw, you don’t mean that,” Wilford said. “If you said <em> I </em> have the diamond, then I must be taking good care of it, right?”</p><p>“<b>I… guess that’s true.</b>” She smiled weakly. “<b>I suppose I already knew that the diamond would be taken from me </b> <b> <em>some</em> </b> <b>how. But… I need it back. Please?</b>”</p><p>Wilford hesitated. “What do I tell Abe?”</p><p>“<b>All you have to tell him is that you know how he feels about you,</b>” Dark said. “<b>You can tell him you’ve given me the diamond back as well.</b>”</p><p>“Okay, but…” Wilford started. “I… don’t know where I put the diamond.”</p><p>Dark’s smile went away completely, and her blue and red auras flickered. “<b>What…?!</b>”</p><p>“I’m so very sorry!” He held up his hands. “I don’t know where I last put it, but I promise, if I find it, you’ll be the first to know!”</p><p>“<b>Okay… okay.</b>” A little nod, and she rubbed at her head. “<b>I’m sorry, I just remembered- this diamond is very important to me. I don’t want you to have to look for it for a long time…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Or have it at all. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Shh. Will’s talking. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“I promise, I’ll try my best to find it.” Wilford was smiling gently.</p><p>“<b>Thank you,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>I don’t know why the people at the museum thought it’d be a good idea to steal </b> <b> <em>my</em> </b> <b> diamond just so it’d be a metaphor.</b>”</p><p>“<em>They </em>stole the diamond first?!?”</p><p>Dark chuckled at how intense Wilford sounded. “<b>Um- well, not the museum staff. It was… a nemesis of sorts, I suppose, if you’d like to call him that.</b>”</p><p>“Oohh…” Wilford held onto his knees. “Who is he? Who does he think he is?”</p><p>“<b>He’s a real pain in my ass, that’s who.</b>”</p><p>“I’ll chop ‘im into pieces!” Wilford exclaimed, which made Dark laugh unexpectedly hard. He felt his heart almost skip a beat. It was like bells.</p><p>“<b>That would be a sight I’d like to see.</b>” Her wide smile made Wilford feel proud.</p><p>Charlotte’s tail wagged across the floor, with her tongue hanging out. She looked happy that Dark and Wilford are humoring each other. Things were okay when her parent and Wilford were happy. “<b>Are you feeling a bit better now? Anything else that you want to hash out?</b>”</p><p>“Before I forget,” Wilford started. “I think Charlotte needs a bath soon.”</p><p>Her head tilted. <b> <em>Bath?</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Don’t give me any ideas,</b>” Dark said. “<b>You know she hates water.</b>”</p><p><b> <em>Don’t even think about it.</em> </b> Charlotte’s tail thumped harshly against the floor.</p><p>“Forget I said anything then,” Wilford said, smirking. “No baths.”</p><p><b> <em>Good.</em> </b> She huffed quietly.</p><p>There’s a small humming sound, and Wilford pulls out his phone from his other pocket.</p><p> </p><p>“WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford gulped. “He’s still mad at me…”</p><p>“<b>Ah.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“THIS ISNT FUNNT WILFORD”</p><p> </p><p>A pause for a few seconds.</p><p> </p><p>“*Funny”</p><p>“DAMN IT”</p><p> </p><p>Ohhh, he was in for it now. Abe <em> never </em>forgot to put in his signature.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m at Dark’s. I thought you wanted me to ask her about diamond”</p><p>“Plus you get really scary when you’re mad and I didn’t want to be around that rn”</p><p> </p><p>“ID FEEL A LOT BETTER IF YOUD BE HOME RGHT NOW”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford huffed before typing back, his fingers making angry little click sounds against the screen.</p><p> </p><p>“Well sorry I don't want to be in your presence SIR”</p><p>“I’ll talk to you when you learn how to turn of your caps lock”</p><p> </p><p>“I KNOW HUW”</p><p> </p><p>“GOODBYE ABE.”</p><p> </p><p>He turned his phone off before Abe could reply. Dark was staring at him. “... What?”</p><p>“<b>Nothing. It just seemed to be a little… tense. What’d he say?</b>”</p><p>Wilford brought his knees to his chest. “A bunch of shit like ‘I will feel better if you come home’, typos and all that. I didn’t bother telling him I’d see you when I left.”</p><p>“<b>You didn’t think about leaving a note?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>Or </b> <b> <em>anything</em> </b> <b> to let him know you’d leave?</b>”</p><p>“Didn’t want to.”</p><p>He was given yet another Look. Four in two days! From two different people! Unprecedented.</p><p>“<b>Will.</b>”</p><p>“What.” He sounded tired.</p><p>“<b>You’re better than that.</b>”</p><p>“How do <em> you </em> know?” Wilford asked, almost loudly.</p><p>“<b>I’ve known you for a long time,</b>” Dark said, as if it’s a matter of fact.</p><p>“A week isn’t that long,” Wilford grumbled.</p><p>“<b>Even longer than that. Longer than you could know.</b>” She sounded tired, too… and maybe even a little sad. “<b>We just… haven’t caught up in a while.</b>”</p><p>A while meaning long enough for Wilford to forget about Dark completely until recently??? Back in the Before? </p><p>… He didn’t understand. Not at all.</p><p>What…</p><p>He…</p><p>“I… need to go…” He stood up, and almost immediately fell over.</p><p>“<b>Wilford-!</b>” Dark got right up from her chair, kneeling down to help him up. “<b>Are you alright?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shook his head. “I am- I’m okay! I… I dunno what <em>that</em> was about…”</p><p>“<b>Are you sure you need to go?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>I think you need to stay here for a while.</b>”</p><p>“No- No thank you,” Wilford said, trying to shrug Dark’s hands off of him. “Abe is gonna be more upset if I don’t leave now.”</p><p>“<b>… Are you sure you’re alright? Do you want me to take you home?</b>”</p><p>“I don’t want you to have to waste your time taking me home again,” Wilford sat on the floor, not bothering to stand up. “You said Abe is jealous, so… I don’t want him to see you with me.”</p><p>“<b>I don’t care what Abe thinks of me at </b> <b> <em>all,</em> </b> <b> Will,</b>” Dark’s tone went stern. “<b>Now, answer me honestly, do you want to go home, or not?</b>”</p><p>“No! Not at all!” Wilford started hugging his shoulders.</p><p>“<b>Well, you don’t want to go home, you don’t want to stay here, what </b> <b> <em>do </em> </b> <b>you want to do? Where </b> <b> <em>do </em> </b> <b>you want to go?</b> <b> <em> What is there, William-</em></b>” Her eyes widened in horror, and she clapped a hand over her mouth.</p><p>“I <em> don’t KNOW! </em>” Wilford screamed, over Dark’s last word. Seeing her face, his posture softened. She looked close to tears, and Charlotte was peering at her strangely. “Are… shit, Dark, are you okay? Did I say something wrong?”</p><p>Wiping her eyes, Dark shook her head. “<b>N- No, it’s… I shouldn’t have pushed you that hard, I’m sorry. You’re going through a lot right now…</b>”</p><p>Her voice wavered again. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him. “<b>I… I need some air…</b>”</p><p>“I’m so sorry- let me come with you?” Wilford attempted to get on his feet.</p><p>“<b>No thank you… Charlotte. Stay, please. Keep him company.</b>” Dark stood up and shut the door from behind her.</p><p>Both Wilford and Charlotte were sitting on the floor. Even though the biggest dog he’s seen in the world was right next to him, Wilford suddenly felt very alone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We DID in fact write Dark kissing Wilford's hand in chapter 12, but I thought it'd be cool to get rid of it so you'd be just as confused as Wilford is~</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0032"><h2>32. Alone Together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dark took multiple deep breaths as she sat down on her chair on the porch. “<b>Alright… he didn’t hear me say it… it’s fine…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What the hell </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why did you say that </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why did you do that </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What are we going to do </em>
</p><p> </p><p>She buried her head in her hands. “<b>It’s okay… He didn’t hear me say his old name… he chose the right time to scream…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You still said it </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You know you’re not supposed to say it in front of him </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You shouldn’t have said it </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>I asked him too many things,</b>” Dark muttered. “<b>It was too much for him and he acknowledged, it’s fine.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What if he heard you </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You could have ruined everything </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He wouldn't come see us anymore </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You almost ruined it </em>
</p><p><em> What’s </em> <b> <em>wrong</em> </b> <em> with you </em></p><p> </p><p>“<b>Shut </b> <b> <em>up,</em></b>” Dark growled through her teeth. “<b>I </b> <b> <em>get it.</em> </b> <b> I could have messed things up between us, but he didn’t hear or acknowledge it. I know I shouldn’t have said his old name. I know I shouldn’t have said </b> <b> <em>anything</em> </b> <b> related to the past. I know he’d be confused. I </b> <b> <em>know.</em></b>”</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He didn’t hear. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s fine. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark leaned back with her eyes closed. “<b>Better.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>… <em>What are we going to do?</em></p><p> </p><p>A short huff. “<b>I don’t know. Let me breathe.</b>” Her head hurt.</p><p><strong> <em>What do </em> <span class="u"> <em>you </em> </span> <em>have to say about this? Anything? </em> </strong> <b> <em>Anything at all?</em> </b></p><p>Nothing. She should have expected as much.</p><p>After a moment of silence, Dark opened her eyes to a huge dog nose in front of her. “<b><em>Gah-! </em> </b> <b>Charlotte!</b>”</p><p>
  <b> <em>What are you doing out here? I thought you were sitting with Wilford?</em> </b>
</p><p>Charlotte sat on the edge of the porch. <b> <em>He’s lonely. He doesn’t want to keep you stressed, but he doesn’t like being by himself. I can tell.</em> </b></p><p>She reached out to pat Charlotte’s paw. <b> <em>So?</em> </b></p><p>Charlotte huffed. <b> <em>Go back inside!</em> </b></p><p>
  <b> <em>I can’t. I’ll just make him sad.</em> </b>
</p><p><b><em>He’s sad right now! Go inside to make him feel better!</em></b> Her tail thumped against the porch. <b><em>He’s sad even with ME in there with him! And I’m great!</em></b></p><p>Dark couldn’t help but chuckle. “<b>Fair enough. But you have to come with me.</b>”</p><p><b><em>Okay.</em></b> Her jaws parted in a wide yawn, and she shook herself as she stood up.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> We can’t do this! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> We’ll do something wrong! </em>
</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>Shut up.</em> </b> Dark took a deep breath before opening the door. <b> <em>Both of you.</em> </b></p><p>Wilford was sitting in the exact spot she’d left him in. He was picking on bits of wood on the floor while hugging his knees.</p><p>“<b>Hi, Will,</b>” Dark said gently.</p><p>“Hi…”</p><p>“<b>May I sit with you?</b>”</p><p>“If you’d like.”</p><p>“<b>Okay.</b>” Dark slowly knelt down on the floor next to him, with her hands on her lap. She glanced at Wilford, but he wasn’t looking back. “<b>I’m sorry about that, I know it must have worried you.</b>”</p><p>He nodded a little. “It did, but… I <em> think </em> I’m okay now.”</p><p>“<b>I don’t think so,</b>” Dark replied. “<b>Not meaning to sound rude, but you look like you lost your first goldfish.</b>”</p><p>“I never had a goldfish,” Wilford mumbled.</p><p>“<b>You know what I mean, flower. You look down.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s head perked for a second, and then his face relaxed. “… I guess I am. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”</p><p>“<b>It’s alright,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I honestly don’t care that you yelled at me. I care that I asked too much.</b>”</p><p>“You were just trying to help.” Wilford finally looked at her. “I dunno why I even yelled at you.”</p><p>“<b>You were upset.</b>” Dark hesitated to put her hand on Wilford’s shoulder. “<b>With a bunch of things going on at once, I wouldn’t blame you. You have a lot to take in right now.</b>”</p><p>Wilford let out a small sigh. “… What am I gonna do, Dark?”</p><p>“<b>I… don’t know,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I think all you have to do is try.</b>”</p><p>He nodded a little bit. “Thanks… I think I should go home now. Abe’s probably worried…”</p><p>“<b>Do you still want to?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“Want to what?”</p><p>“<b>Want to go home.</b>” She didn’t notice, but she was getting closer to Wilford. “<b>I don’t think you want to go home just to see Abe being worried about you.</b>”</p><p>“I don’t know… maybe not…” His voice trailed off quietly. “I think I should at least tell him I’m sorry.”</p><p>“<b>For what?</b>”</p><p>“Turned my phone off before he could say anything.” Wilford pulled his phone out just to show to Dark that yes, the phone is off completely. “That was mean. If he’d done that, I would have been pissed.”</p><p>“<b>I feel like </b> <b> <em>anybody</em> </b> <b> would have,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>Wilford nodded again, turning on the phone. </p><p>His notifications had blown up. Mostly just Abe getting worried about the lack of replies, before either realizing the phone had died, or Wilford was just ignoring him.</p><p>“Jeez…”</p><p>“<b>What’d he say?</b>”</p><p>Wilford handed Dark his phone without saying anything.</p><p> </p><p>“IS YIR PHONE DEAD??????”</p><p>“*your”</p><p>“fucking dammit”</p><p> </p><p>Dark snorted so loudly that she startled Charlotte into sneezing. Wilford tried to replicate what would be so funny, so he forced a small smile.</p><p> </p><p>“are you coming home or not”</p><p>“Ive been waiting for hours”</p><p>“Wilford”</p><p>“Wilford”</p><p>“Wilford”</p><p>“Wilford”</p><p>“WILFORD WARFSTACHE”</p><p>“ANSWER ME RIGHT NOW”</p><p> </p><p>That was a while ago. There was something fearful about it. Wilford kept hugging his knees, and Dark put the phone down next to his feet, trying to contain a fit of laughter over one typo.</p><p>“<b>I’m sorry-</b>” she snickered. “<b>Abe seems very upset.</b>”</p><p>“‘Seems’?” Wilford asked. “He’s fucking <em> livid! </em> If I don’t do something to let him know I’m okay, he’ll kill me if he ever sees me!”</p><p><b> <em>Do you want to talk to him?</em> </b> Wilford could hear the question ringing in his head. <em> No… not when he’s like this. </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>Then I suppose you’ll both have to wait.</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford glanced at her. “… Could you talk to him for me?”</p><p>“<b>What do you want me to say?</b>” Dark asked. Wilford handed her the phone again.</p><p>“I dunno,” he said. “Anything. Anything that can get me out of trouble.”</p><p>“<b>O… kay…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Um.</b>”</p><p>“<b>Hi.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“THANK GOD”</p><p>“Where were you”</p><p>“Why werent you answering me”</p><p>“Wilford”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>This isn’t Wilford.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“Who the hell is it”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>This is Dark.</b>”</p><p>“<b>Don’t worry, he’s safe in the cabin.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“Is he coming back”</p><p>“I want him to come home right now”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>I’m trying to talk him into going home.</b>”</p><p>“<b>Don’t worry. He’ll be there.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“Read my last text”</p><p>“I want him home NOW”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>There’s nothing I can do at the moment.</b>”</p><p>“<b>He doesn’t want to be home right now because of how you’re behaving.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“The hell is that supposed to mean”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Well, why don’t you read back at your own texts?</b>”</p><p>“<b>I believe he said he’d talk to you again when you ‘learn how to turn off your caps lock’?</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“I know how to work a phone thank you”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Are you sure? Punctuation doesn’t seem to exist in almost every message you’ve sent on it.</b>”</p><p>“<b>But I digress. He won’t talk to you because you’re not treating him fairly.</b>”</p><p>“<b>It’s not him you’re mad at, Abraham.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“Please stop using my full name”</p><p>“I treat wilford the way i always have”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Unfairly?</b>”</p><p>“<b>Wilford’s not a child, you know. You should be able to have a decent conversation with a friend without losing your fucking mind, Abraham.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“What did i just say about my full name”</p><p>“And you dont have to talk to me like this i could get you arrested”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>Like what?</b>”</p><p>“<b>Oh- that’s funny. You’re very funny.</b>”</p><p>“<b>I assume that was a joke?</b>”</p><p>“<b>Does that warrant a ‘Hahahahaha’?</b>”</p><p> </p><p>“Im serious im a detective”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>If you are such a great detective, then you should have found out why Wilford is so upset by now.</b>”</p><p>“<b>Right?</b>”</p><p> </p><p>There wasn’t a response after quite a while. Dark was waiting patiently for something.</p><p>The phone buzzed after five minutes.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t have to deal with this.”</p><p>“I’m coming over.”</p><p>“- A. L.”</p><p> </p><p>“<b>You’re adorable.</b>”</p><p>“<b>See you later then.</b>”</p><p>“<b>- Not Wilford</b>”</p><p> </p><p>Dark shut the phone off, and handed it to Wilford. “<b>That was relieving.</b>”</p><p>“Why, how was he?”</p><p>“<b>I believe the word you might use would be ‘huffy’.</b>” Dark had a small smirk on her face. “<b>I kept calling him by his full first name, and he didn’t like it. He then used that annoying tactic, ‘If YoU tAlK tO mE tHiS wAy, I cAn GeT yOu ArReStEd’.</b>”</p><p>“He <em> can </em> though,” Wilford said. “He’s a detective.”</p><p>“<b>He seems to forget I’m not exactly human,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I can get out of every situation with ease. It doesn’t matter if he tries to arrest me.</b>”</p><p>A tiny giggle.</p><p>“<b>What?</b>”</p><p>“‘I’m Darkiplier, I’m great. Don’t worry about me, Wilford, I’ll just slip out of the jail bars. i'M nOt HuMaN.’” Wilford giggled even more. Dark cracked a smile.</p><p>It felt nice, seeing Wilford still being able to find the humor in things, especially when he’s down. “<b>I’ll try not to get to that point.</b>”</p><p>“You’re <em> Darkiplier! </em>” Wilford said, grinning now. “You just said it wouldn’t matter, ‘cuz you’ll get out anyway!”</p><p>“<b>Ah, I did, didn’t I? Where are we, in a court of law?</b>”</p><p>“We’re in the middle of nowhere, of course not!” Wilford exclaimed. “Unless…?”</p><p>Dark scoffed. “<b>I have done nothing wrong, ever, in my life.</b>”</p><p>“I know this, and I love you!”</p><p>After a long pause of Wilford smiling wide at a surprised and flustered Dark, Wilford suddenly realized what he just blurted out loud, and clasped a hand over his mouth.</p><p>Dark had her hand up against her own mouth as well, but she was trying not to smile.</p><p>Both were blushing. If Wilford had his hood stitched back on his sweater, he’d pull it up and cover his face completely. He instead covered his face with his arms, shivering. “Um… um…”</p><p>A hand rested on his shoulder, and he allowed himself to glance up. She had a soft expression, and the colored lights around her flickered. He let out a shuddering breath when she cupped his cheek, and her eyes narrowed. “Oh…”</p><p>“<b>May I…?</b>”</p><p>“What-?”</p><p>Dark blushed, but glanced down at his lips. Will was frozen up. He looked scared over what he just said, but… why was he being so unintentionally cute??? His entire neck was red. “Um- um-”</p><p>Adorable. Dark couldn’t stop smiling. “<b>Silly thing.</b>”</p><p>Wilford tried to look anywhere else in the room, and saw Charlotte asleep on her back. She looks <em> very </em> comfortable with her legs sprawled out like that. That was a nice mini distraction, but he could still feel Dark’s hand on his cheek, and he was still beet red.</p><p>Her fingers were cold, but- his face, it was way too warm. What the hell is this gonna lead up to???</p><p>She tilted his chin, and there was a little smirk now. “<b>Feeling better?</b>”</p><p>
  <em> I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know, Idon’tknow, Idon’tknow, Idon’tknow, Idon’tknow, IdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknowIdontknow…… </em>
</p><p>Okay… That’s a lot.</p><p>
  <b><em>Breathe. It’ll be okay.</em> </b>
</p><p>He started breathing harder than he should have. He looked like a cornered puppy. Oh no- That’s the opposite of what Dark wanted!</p><p>“<b>It’s alright, Will,</b>” she said through a small chuckle. “<b>I figured you would let it slip out anyway.</b>”</p><p>“You’re not mad at me…?” The way Wilford said that sounded almost forced.</p><p>“<b>Why would I be?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>I played dumb so you wouldn’t have to worry. It was a bit obvious.</b>”</p><p>Wilford blinked slowly. “I guess almost everybody’s got a ‘play dumb so the hopeless romantic won’t notice’ tactic, huh?”</p><p>“<b>Oh, yes. Otherwise this fic would have been over by now.</b>”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>”</p><p>They both brushed it off.</p><p>“<b>What I meant to ask you earlier was…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Are you sure this is a good idea…? Abe is on his way here. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s a long walk. It’ll be fine.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>May I kiss you?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>Just to move this along…</b>”</p><p>Wilford squirmed at the request. “Whu- w- wha- wh- whe- wh- w- w- <em> whu-</em>”</p><p>This went on for a while. His brain seemed to be short-circuiting with all of this stuttering.</p><p><em>Pretty Dark I want to smooch but I’m scared to smooch</em> <em>SHE WANTS TO SMOOCH OH NO WHAT- </em></p><p>After a second, Dark smirked while rolling her eyes. She leaned over and pecked his cheek. “<b>There.</b>”</p><p>“<em>MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM-!! </em>” It was a very loud squeak. Wilford had a very big grin. It was very apparent, even when he tried to cover his face.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Reminds me of before. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford was giggling softly. His feet bounced on the floor, and his fingers were fiddling all around each other. Probably a bit overstimulated. Charlotte snorted in her sleep.</p><p>“<b>Feeling any better </b> <b> <em>now? </em> </b> ” Dark asked. Wilford took a deep breath in an attempt to compose himself with his face still covered, and he nodded. “<b>Good… can I kiss you for real this time?</b>”</p><p><em> YES PLEASE- </em> Wilford cleared his throat. “Uh- I- okay…”</p><p>“<b>Alright.</b>”</p><p>Wilford cleared his throat again, rubbing his cheeks. He was <em> really </em> warm.</p><p>Dark shifted closer to him, taking his hands. Wilford finally looked straight at her. “Um… what do I…”</p><p>She shushed him, squeezing his hands. She didn’t move very fast- didn’t want to startle him, anyways. “<b>Are you scared? You don’t need to be.</b>”</p><p>He shook his head. “I know…!”</p><p>“<b>Good…</b>” Their noses brushed, and Wilford’s eyes closed.</p><p>When she kissed him, she heard the door slam open. Wilford flinched. The two immediately let go of each other’s hands. Wilford’s eyes were wide, and Dark looked over her shoulder.</p><p>“Um- I’m gonna… step outside.” The door slammed shut.</p><p>“ABE-!” Wilford had lipstick smudged on his face. He brushed it off and glanced at Dark for a second. “I’m really sorry-”</p><p>He stumbled on his feet and ran to the door. “Abe! Wait! Come back!”</p><p>Charlotte snorted, blinking slowly. <b> <em>Where are you going…? </em> </b></p><p>Wilford was already out of the cabin, leaving the two gray beings inside. Dark sat still, staring at the door.</p><p>
  <b> <em>I shouldn’t have done that.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>WE TOLD YOU!</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>SHUT UP-!</em> </b>
</p><p>Charlotte rolled on her stomach, and crawled next to Dark. <b> <em>Your face is really dark, Parent… Did something happen?</em> </b></p><p><b> <em>… Yeah. </em> </b> She rested a hand on the dog’s head. <b> <em>I should have known better.</em> </b></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0033"><h2>33. Together Alone</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This one is my most favorite chapter we've done so far. I also pulled a Steven Universe and switched the two words together for different purposes. ;)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Abe, wait a minute!”</p><p>Abe was walking into the field. “I don’t want to hear it. It’s fine.”</p><p>“But I-”</p><p>Abe somehow began walking faster. “It’s fine!”</p><p>“Then why are you running?”</p><p>“I’m <em> not </em>running. I’m speed walking.”</p><p>“Same thing!” Wilford ran to try to catch up. It’d be great if rocks weren’t in the way to make him stumble. Abe was <em> really </em>fast.</p><p>“Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving, Wilford?” Abe sounded like he was trying to be calm, but failing.</p><p>“It’s not like I’d be leaving forever!” Wilford exclaimed.</p><p>Abe turned around to reply, but Wilford ran into him. Abe was not amused. “What was I <em>supposed</em> to think?!? There was no note, no ‘Hey, I’m going out today!’, no text, nothing! What if you were<em> hurt? </em> What if you were in <em> trouble? </em> What if you got stuck somewhere and I couldn’t come find you, because you were too proud to <em> turn your damn phone on? </em>”</p><p>“<em>Hey! </em> ” Wilford poked Abe’s chest with a finger. “You don’t get to lecture me! From what I remember, that was <em> my </em> job in the first place! It was how we <em>got</em> here! I <em>saved</em> your sorry ass!”</p><p>Abe snorted and turned away from him. “That was a long time ago.”</p><p>He was beginning to walk again, and Wilford’s breathing quickened for a second. “Abe, <em> stop! </em>”</p><p>He didn’t stop.</p><p>“<em>Abe! </em>”</p><p>Abe still wasn’t stopping, and Wilford was just mad and confused now.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter,” Abe said suddenly. “Come home whenever you want. I don’t care anymore.”</p><p>Wilford stopped walking. “… That’s not fair. You don’t- you don’t get to say things like that, you know that’s not fair.” </p><p>Abe was farther away, but Wilford could hear him crystal clear. “I could care less. You don’t have to come back just for me. It’s fine.”</p><p>“Abe-”</p><p>“It’s <b> <em>FINE! </em> </b>” Abe finally stopped to turn around to Wilford, and his face was beet red, and there were small tears building up in his eyes.</p><p>“<em>IT’S NOT FINE! IT’S CLEARLY </em> <b> <em>NOT </em> </b> <em> FINE, BUT YOU DON’T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING! </em> ” Wilford had to shove his hands in his pockets, otherwise they’d be shaking. “<em>YOU JUST WANNA YELL AT ME! SO </em> <b> <em>FINE!</em> </b> <em> WE’RE YELLING NOW! </em>”</p><p>“<em>I GUESS WE ARE! </em>”</p><p>“<em>GOOD! </em> <em> YOU WOULDN’T LAST A DAY WITHOUT ME! </em>”</p><p>“<em>I WILL TOO! </em>”</p><p>“<em>NO, YOU WON’T! AND I WOULDN’T EITHER IF IT WEREN’T FOR YOU! YOU’RE STUCK WITH ME <strong>FOREVER! </strong></em>”</p><p>Abe gestured with his middle finger before he was out of Wilford’s sight. He grit his teeth, hearing his heart beat. He was lost for a comeback.</p><p>Wilford needed a lozenge.</p><p>He watched Abe disappear into the woods, and his fists clenched in his pockets. He turned around to see Dark standing behind him. She had a stern look with her arms crossed.</p><p>“… Sorry, Dark.” Wilford’s voice was suddenly hoarse.</p><p>“<b>It’s fine,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>“I don’t wanna hear ‘It’s fine’ ever again,” he whispered. His eyes started to itch, and he rubbed at them, trying to hold back a sniffle. “He hates me.”</p><p>Dark’s face softened. “<b>Will, no he doesn’t-</b>”</p><p>Wilford sucked in a breath. “He hates me and he doesn’t wanna be my friend anymore… he…”</p><p>He quietly began to cry. “Abe hates me…”</p><p>Dark walked over, and wrapped her arms around Wilford gently. “<b>Wilford, come on. You know he doesn’t. He may need some time by himself. Alright?</b>”</p><p>Wilford couldn’t answer, and his whole body was shaking. Dark’s fingers brushed through his hair- well, what he had. It was mostly just a fuzzy black shark fin.</p><p>“<b>He’s your best friend. He doesn’t hate you at </b> <b> <em>all.</em> </b> <b> And if he did, then you would have to stay with Charlotte and me.</b>”</p><p>Wilford slowly started to hug Dark back, crying harder. He tried to replicate his thoughts into words, but it was just a bunch of blubbering.</p><p><em> He hates me, he hates me, he </em> <b> <em>hates</em> </b> <em> me… </em></p><p>Dark rubbed his back. “<b><em>Shhhshhhshhshhh.</em> </b> <b> It’s alright.</b>”</p><p>Her voice was always so calming.</p><p> </p><p>Abe could hear him from where he was, but he chose not to respond.</p><p>Let him cry. It’s fine.</p><p> </p><p>It was getting dark out, so Dark and Wilford went back inside the cabin (well, she kind of half-dragged him). Wilford didn’t say anything for the rest of the night.</p><p>Dark brought up a bowl of yogurt from out of nowhere so he’d soothe his throat. He ate it silently, and fell asleep against Charlotte.</p><p>Sometimes, throughout the night, Dark thought she could hear him sobbing.</p><p> </p><p>Abe got a message on his phone that his car was fixed. He went right over to get it back, and drove the rest of the way home.</p><p>He couldn’t feel his friend with him at all once he stepped foot in his apartment. It was completely silent.</p><p>… He wished he’d said something back.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0034"><h2>34. A Mess Cleaning A Mess</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Abe’s eyes opened slowly, peeking at the clock on his desk. 11:57 AM.</p><p>There wasn’t a huge reaction, just a grumble.</p><p>Groaning slightly, Abe sat up in his chair, with a yellow sticky note stuck to his head. He picked it off, expecting something to be written on it, but it was blank. Abe sighed quietly.</p><p>So. He <em> wasn’t </em>home yet.</p><p>… What <em> day </em>was it?</p><p>Well… even though nothing special was going on, Abe might as well do chores around the apartment. At least he could clean up <em> one </em> mess in his life.</p><p>He eventually rolled out of the chair, dragging himself over to the window. He hissed when he opened the curtains- it was a lot brighter outside than he’d expected.</p><p>A sigh. He left the curtains open. One out of… some chores to do.</p><p>Abe knew his office was always utter chaos, but… that’s how he’d find things easier that way. Sure, he’d trip over newspapers and catch his foot stuck in red lines all over the place, but it’s something he’s gotten used to. Even <em> if </em>someone scolded him over it on a near daily basis…</p><p>Untouched office. For now.</p><p>He walked straight past the <em> one </em> bedroom in this whole apartment, though the door was cracked open.</p><p>The first thing Abe spotted in the kitchen was the dried up ink splatter on his notepad from the other night. He wanted to clean it up, but that’d mean possibly throwing the whole notepad away. And it’s his favorite kind! He got a whole collection of the same notepad for his birthday, and this was his last one!</p><p>“Dammit,” Abe muttered through his teeth.</p><p>He picked up the notebook, leafing through it… didn’t seem to have leaked through too many pages. On the last few pages, there were tiny doodles that Abe <em> knew </em> he didn’t draw, and he immediately closed the notepad and tossed it back on the table. He had to admit though, the ink splatter did make a pretty cool design. Kinda made it look more crime scene-y than just… notes.</p><p>… Were those doodles made with a glitter pen? Abe shrugged it off and went to the living room, snatching two coffee-stained mugs- one pink, one gray- hanging out on the table and basically throwing them in the sink. They made a clinking sound, but nothing chipped.</p><p>There was also that plate of waffles Abe didn’t finish. Not thinking about it, he tossed the whole plate in the trash can. Such waste of some good waffles… Abe shrugged it off, and stacked some DVD cases back in a small shelf underneath the TV.</p><p>He stared at a particular section of the shelf for an embarrassingly long time, before shoving <em> The Room </em> back in its designated spot. He tried desperately not to recite any quotes from the film in his head. <em> Cheep, cheep, cheep. </em></p><p>He absently touched his lips, and then shook his head.</p><p>
  <em> Stop it. </em>
</p><p>No one answered. Abe sighed. He went back to the kitchen to try and clean the dishes. He wasn’t very good at it, but he’d at least try. The dishwasher was still broken, though, because of that one time Wilford shot it it’d been shot. Turns out it was just a knife that fell out of a pocket that caused a ruckus.</p><p>After an attempt of doing the dishes (which were about 50% done), Abe went back to his office, ignoring the bedroom once again.</p><p>He was able to put papers in folders, remove tabs over crimes he’d look over that didn’t matter anymore, and even get rid of old documents on his computer. He had many many <em> many </em> red strings wrapped around his hands, only for him to cut them off and toss them in the trash, along with old tabs. The only thing that was left was sorting out his drawers in his desk. He figured he’d do the biggest drawer to his right. The biggest drawer concludes the biggest mess. The biggest mess concludes the biggest sorting arrangement. <em> Fun. </em></p><p>The first thing that Abe saw once he opened the drawer was his old black pistol. Wow… It’s been a while since he’s seen this thing. How long has it been since he last used it? The early 70’s? It must have been, because this gun has been collecting dust like nobody’s business. Small fake pink curls were stuck in bits and pieces. There was a shoebox, and it had a pair of black and white dancing shoes. After digging a bunch of different sorts of <strike> nostalgic </strike> unimportant objects out of the drawer, Abe saw that there was a small polaroid picture at the very bottom.</p><p>Wordlessly, Abe set the object down on the floor, and he pulled out the picture. It was of him and Wilford after the first night they danced at a disco. Both of their faces were very pink, and they looked a bit tipsy. Wilford was grinning widely, and Abe had a big pink afro wig on his head, with some curls covering up his eyes. The two of them looked like they were having such a fun time.</p><p>Abe was sitting still, staring at the photo longer than he knew he shouldn’t have. He looked out at the hallway, remembering that Wilford’s door was cracked open. He got up to his feet with the photo, and headed to his friend’s bedroom.</p><p>It was less messy than Abe expected it to be, only with a few paper clips and rubber bands sprawled out on top of Wilford’s own desk. The incomplete rubik’s cube resided on the bed all by itself.</p><p>Abe glanced at the CD player. He knew that Vol. 4 was in that thing, the CD that started this whole thing. His brows furrowed, looking in any different direction away from the CD player.</p><p>This whole thing was so unnecessary, Abe knew it from the bottom of his heart. His hands were on the desk, as if he was going to give the player an interrogation. If it was sentient, he probably <em> would </em> do that. Assuming it’d be unplugged, Abe pressed a button, until it started playing song number 11. It was a bit startling, to say the least.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Cupid, draw back your bow, </em></p><p>
  <em> And let your arrow go, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Straight to my lover’s heart for me, for me. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Cupid, please hear my cry, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> And let your arrow fly, </em>
</p><p><em> Straight to my lover’s heart for me.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Of <em> course. </em></p><p>Abe let out a deep sigh while rolling his eyes. He wanted to turn the player off, but… the apartment did feel a bit empty. He let it play, and he paced around his friend’s room.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Now I don’t mean to bother you, but I’m in distress, </em></p><p>
  <em> There’s danger of me losing all of my happiness, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> For I love a girl who doesn’t know I exist, </em>
</p><p><em> And this you can fix, so! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>He opened the walk-in closet, expecting an avalanche of clothes to come out. But everything was neatly hung up or folded, vaguely organized by color and how often he wore it. There was some pretty old stuff in here… he was just as much of a hoarder as Abe. Some old outfits of Abe’s were in here, too, hanging up in the corner. He stared in disbelief at his old overcoat and deerstalker, right in the very back… how long had this been kept?</p><p>Abe poked at it, noticing that a few holes in the chest had been stitched up. A feeling he couldn’t quite place welled up, stuck in his ribs, his throat.</p><p>A lot of the things that happened before that night at the disco, he couldn’t quite remember anymore. Whether by choice or by the passage of time, Abe didn’t know. </p><p>Damn, he was old.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Now, cupid, if your arrow make a love storm for me, </em></p><p>
  <em> I promise I will love her until eternity, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I know between the two of us, her heart we can steal, </em>
</p><p><em> Help me if you will, so! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>He’d taken care of a lot of the things in here. Stuff Abe could have sworn were ruined, or lost, were merely hiding in the rows somewhere. Hidden in plain sight, huh.</p><p>Fucking hoarder.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Cupid, don’t hear me? </em></p><p>
  <em> Calling you, I need ya. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Cupid! Help me, I need ya! </em>
</p><p><em> Cupid, don’t fail me…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>The song faded, and Abe got out of the closet, feeling a little baffled. How was this place so <em> orderly? </em></p><p>The question vanished Abe’s mind, as soon as one of his favorite singers started playing…</p><p> </p><p>“<em>For the longest time, who-o-oa…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford must be psychic, because Abe <em> knew </em> that this CD was made before he made the decision that Wilford would live with him permanently.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>You cause too much trouble, you gotta live with me.</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>I don’t want to cuz you’re a killjoy, but I like you so I guess I have to.</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>Wh- what?</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>I MEAN SURE COOL LEMME GRAB MY STUFF! First, I’mma go to Cuba to get my bubble smoke pipe. :D</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p><em> “</em><em>Your </em> <b> <em> what?</em></b><em>” </em></p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>My bubble smoke pipe! You know, like that Sherlock dude! Smoking’s very bad for you, you know.</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Abe remembered he was fed up but he’s the one who offered, so he’d said nothing. Even though he still smokes. He just keeps it all in his <em> private trash can, </em> so Wilford wouldn’t have to lecture him about it.</p><p>Speaking of which… where is that trash can? It’s been a while since Abe had some smokage in his system. Sure he’s never been much for it, but… it never mattered to him for a long time.</p><p>Abe left the bedroom without turning the CD off, retreating back to his office. Less trashed. Still a few red strings in places it didn’t need to be, though. Eh. He’d finish it later. At least it’s easier to walk around with less slippery papers all over the place.</p><p>He went over to the darkest corner of the office, removing a blanket to reveal a small silver trash can filled to the brim with cigarettes, vape pens, cigars, and such. ‘Tis truly a thing of beauty.</p><p>Abe was honestly surprised that Wilford hasn’t found this yet. He’s the kind of person that can do a bunch of crazy shit, but if he sees someone smoking? He doesn’t care about death, but he only cares if the person is hurting.</p><p>That, or it smells weird.</p><p>Either way, that would be Wilford’s best quality and worst, besides being so fucking eccentric.</p><p>Abe shakes his head, grabbing a small pack. Without really thinking about it, he went back to Wilford’s room.</p><p>Where had his lighter gone… he rooted through his pocket, plopping down on the bed. David Bowie was playing on the CD now. Abe heard this song from a movie before… Something with a goblin and a baby? Wilford was into some weird stuff.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>There’s such a sad love, deep in your eyes, </em></p><p>
  <em> A kind of pale jewel, open and closed, </em>
</p><p><em> Within your eyes…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>All that Abe remembered was that the film was <em> super </em> strange… but at least David Bowie stole the show. The puppets were impressive, but… Abe had to be honest, the <em> greatest </em> puppet work in that film was what was going on in David Bowie’s tights.</p><p>He wasn’t sure if it was a good choice or a bad choice, but… he could make <em> so </em> many jokes about it if he had the chance to see the film again.</p><p>Abe plopped back on Wilford’s bed, staring up at the ceiling with a lit cigarette in his mouth. He took a long drag from it, letting out a sigh.</p><p>If Wilford found out Abe was smoking in his bed, he’d fucking flip. One of the things he’d piss Abe off about is that he just cares so damn much about him. It was <em> weird, </em> sometimes, to walk in the door knowing someone else was inside. Someone who cared way more than he did about making sure the dishes were clean every day, and are you sure you had breakfast, Abe? None of your vitamins were taken this morning, you promised you’d stop ‘forgetting’- you know what, why don’t you take ‘em now. <em> Yes, </em>now.</p><p>Abe smacked his face with his hand. “Dammit.”</p><p>He suddenly felt very small. He didn’t realize how big the apartment was without his friend. He shut his eyes while sucking in a breath, and almost choked on a bit of smoke stuck in his throat. The cigarette was already almost out, so he tossed it on a small tray he brought with him.</p><p>Abe kept staring up at the ceiling as the song kept on playing. It was a bit longer than he thought it would be, but it was a nice song to say the least. It’s David Bowie, who <em> wouldn’t </em> like his songs?</p><p>Not Wilford.</p><p>God- <em> why </em> was Abe in such a nostalgic mood all of the sudden?! Wilford has been gone for almost two days!</p><p> </p><p>“<em>It’s not like I’d be leaving forever! </em>”</p><p>“<em>YOU WOULDN’T LAST A DAY WITHOUT ME! </em>”</p><p>“<em>NO, YOU WON’T! AND I WOULDN’T EITHER IF IT WEREN’T FOR YOU! </em>”</p><p><em> “</em><em>He hates me, he hates me, he </em> <b> <em>hates </em> </b> <em> me… </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Oh… oh.</p><p>
  <em> Idiot. </em>
</p><p>Abe sighed deeply through his nose.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>As the pain sweeps through, </em></p><p>
  <em> Makes no sense for you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Every thrill is gone, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Wasn’t so much fun at all, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> But I’ll be there for you, </em>
</p><p><em> As the world falls down.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>He wasn’t here. Abe couldn’t feel him around him at all. It wasn’t a feeling he was used to, and he didn’t like it. Kind of… empty. It’s been a long time since Abe has felt this lonely. It was kind of scary to think about.</p><p>Abe’s eyes started to itch, but he scrubbed them both harshly with his hands, gritting his teeth.</p><p>Goblin King David Bowie was right.</p><p>Every thrill is gone.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0035"><h2>35. Good Company</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“<b>Is your throat feeling any better?</b>” Dark asked. Wilford hummed, and there were small cracks in his voice.</p><p>“A bit,” he replied. There was a hint of a whisper. “Thanks.”</p><p>“<b>Of course,</b>” Dark said. He pulled out a half-empty carton of yogurt from out of nowhere. “<b>Let me know if you need more.</b>”</p><p>Wilford simply nodded. “Mm-hmm.”</p><p>He hadn’t been sleeping very well as of late. He hasn’t really done anything since the ending of the 33rd chapter. Wilford was staring out of the window while he was sitting at the table, completely silent. This is a rarity, especially for him. He sort of wished he brought his music, but he didn’t say anything about it. Meanwhile, Abe’s using his CD’s like there’s no tomorrow. Rude.</p><p>Dark would look at Wilford for a few minutes, seeing if he’d move around, say something, or do <em> any </em>thing that good old Wilford Warfstache would normally do.</p><p>He really just seemed all talked out. The only time he would ever talk was if Dark asked something. His sentences would be shorter, and his wobbling lilt would be less obvious.</p><p>“<b>You need anything else?</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “Mm-mm.”</p><p>“<b>Let me know if you do.</b>”</p><p>“Mm-hmm.”</p><p>See?</p><p>Wilford sighed, slumping over a little bit. Charlotte trotted over and nudged his hand with her nose, and he closed his eyes.</p><p>He was so tired. Dark could tell.</p><p>“<b>You need sleep, Wilford,</b>” he said. “<b>You don’t look well.</b>”</p><p>“I’m okay, Dark,” Wilford said without looking at him. “I’m great.”</p><p>Liar.</p><p>“<b>You’re bad at hiding truths,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Even you must know that.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah, I do,” Wilford said, not smiling. He plunked his head down on the table, still staring out the window. “I’m a bit of a fool like that.”</p><p>“<b>You’re not a fool, Wilford,</b>” Dark said, taking off his blazer. “<b>You’re just tired. Here.</b>”</p><p>Dark draped the blazer over Wilford’s back. “<b>Get some rest if you can, alright?</b>”</p><p>“I’ll try,” Wilford mumbled. “You going somewhere?”</p><p>“<b>Just outside,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I’m thinking about going into town later today.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s head perked slowly.</p><p>“Can I come with you?” He didn’t sound excited, but Dark knew he immediately wanted to join in on whatever he’d be doing.</p><p>“<b>Sure, after you rest a little bit.</b>”</p><p>“Can we get ice cream…?”</p><p>“<b>Later,</b>” Dark said. He was on his way to the door. “<b>Charlotte, keep him company. I’ll be outside only for a moment, okay?</b>”</p><p>Wilford sighed through his nose, giving a weak thumbs up. “Mm-hmm.”</p><p>“<b>Alright.</b>” Dark shut the door on his way out. Wilford could hear footsteps only on the porch. What was he doing? Maybe just to get some air. Or to be alone so he wouldn’t have to deal with Wilford being such a sad sack. Most definitely the second one.</p><p>Charlotte whined, and Wilford dragged his hand over to pat her head. <b><em>Why are you being such a sad sack?</em></b></p><p>Wilford forced a small laugh. “I guess I just miss my buddy, sweetie. He wants to be by himself, so… I’m not going home now.”</p><p>Charlotte licked his hand, but that just led to her licking his whole arm. He smiled weakly. “You’re a good girl.”</p><p>Her tail thumped. <b> <em>I am!</em> </b></p><p>Wilford took a deep breath, and sighed. “I wish I knew about you before the whole diamond business.”</p><p><b><em>I’m glad I know you now.</em></b> She nuzzled him a little bit. Wilford’s arm was around her neck, and he tried to avoid her breath. <b><em>You’re fun.</em></b></p><p>Wilford chuckled quietly, which was music to Charlotte’s ears! “I’m glad you think so.”</p><p>Charlotte’s front paws hopped up, and draped over Wilford’s legs. Wilford sat straight up, and Dark’s blazer fell off his back. “AGH-! Charlotte-! Heavy! You’re heavy! Ow!”</p><p>Charlotte’s tail was wagging with stray hairs flying. <b> <em>Wilforrrrrrrrd-</em> </b></p><p>“You said my name for once!” Wilford winced. “I’m proud of you, but- <em> please- </em> get offa me…!”</p><p>A whine.</p><p>Wilford couldn’t see, but Dark was back inside, watching. “Charlotte- heavy- heavy, please get off-”</p><p>“<b>Okay, Charlotte, get off of him,</b>” Dark said, and Wilford flinched.</p><p>Charlotte gave him a quick lick on the face and hopped off of him. Wilford gripped on his legs. “Good girl… <em> ow…</em>”</p><p>Charlotte sat down with her tongue hanging out, and she was smiling. <b> <em>Parent, I made Wilford happy now! He didn’t need sleep after all!</em> </b></p><p>Well… not <em> permanently </em> happy, but temporarily, at least. Wilford didn’t know how much he needed that. He was smiling a little bit. </p><p>“<b>Good girl, Charlotte,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Can I go outside?</em> </b>
</p><p>“<b>Of course you can. Good work.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte nuzzled against Dark as he opened the door to let her out. He left it open, looking back at Wilford.</p><p>“<b>You look like you need a bit of exploration too,</b>” he said. “<b>You want to come with me or no?</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s smile gradually grew, and he stood up. Finally! Something new! An excuse not to lay around all day! “I’d like that very much.”</p><p>“<b>Come on then.</b>”</p><p>Wilford sprang up, retrieving the blazer. The three of them were off.</p><p>“<b>You don’t have to worry about going through the woods, right?</b>”</p><p>“I was alright on my way here, so…”</p><p>“<b>Alright. Charlotte, aren’t you coming?</b>”</p><p>Charlotte was trotting off in her own direction. Dark clicked his tongue. “<b>Let her do her thing, then.</b>”</p><p>Must have been getting cabin fever.</p><p>“What do we want to do today?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>Well, I was thinking we could go to town,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Maybe get you some more food than yogurt. And clothes. Something other than just that sweater that’s falling apart on you.</b>”</p><p>“It was just the hood, but okay.” That trailed off into mumbling, but Wilford shook it off. “What about you?”</p><p>Dark pondered. “<b>Art supplies… a bit more food. Some fertilizer for my garden.</b>”</p><p>“Huh.”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>”</p><p>“That’s not a lot of stuff.”</p><p>“<b>I don’t normally want too many things. It’s my ‘aesthetic’, really.</b>”</p><p>Wilford smiled. “How humanitarian of you.”</p><p>“<b>The cabin’s not that big, anyways,</b>” Dark muttered. “<b>It’s not like I have room to keep random shit.</b>”</p><p>“You keep Charlotte,” Wilford pointed out.</p><p>“<b>She’s my dog, I have to keep her.</b>”</p><p>He <em> just </em> said he’d let her do her own thing…</p><p>“She’s a <em> big </em> dog, too,” Wilford said. “How do you have enough room in the cabin for her anyway?”</p><p>Dark didn’t show it, but he was happy Wilford was talking again. He’s getting his pep back, little by little.</p><p>“<b>I don’t fully know. She’s a strange being.</b>”</p><p>“You think she gets cramped in there?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>Probably,</b>” Dark shrugged. “<b>The cabin does get very small, once you get used to it.</b>”</p><p>“We could find a new place for her,” Wilford said. “For her and you.”</p><p>“<b>… No, if she was unhappy, she would have told me.</b>” Dark frowned. “<b>And she tells me everything.</b>”</p><p>Wilford hopped a bit, to catch up with Dark. “Well, I think the both of you might need a new place, <em> much </em> bigger than a cabin.”</p><p>“<b>If you’re thinking I don’t like my cabin, you are </b> <b> <em>very</em> </b> <b> wrong,</b>” Dark said, hands wringing from behind his back.</p><p>“I didn’t say that,” Wilford said, hopping again. “I’m saying it would be like a present for you or something. The cabin is cozy, but I think you need something a bit bigger. <em> I </em> can keep the cabin if you’d like!”</p><p>“<b>No- no, no,</b>” Dark waved his hands, and stopped walking for a moment. “<b>I appreciate the idea, Wilford, really. But Charlotte and I have been living in these fields for as long as I can remember. We have all the space we could possibly want out here.</b>”</p><p>Wilford took a small breath. “Yeah, but-”</p><p>“<b>It’s alright, flower,</b>” Dark said, not meaning to interrupt. “<b>We’re content.</b>”</p><p>Wilford looked down to the ground for a moment. “Alright then.”</p><p>“<b>Don’t misunderstand me, I appreciate the offer. It’s just better we keep to ourselves, for the most part.</b>”</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>A little snort. “<b>Can you imagine the stares I would get if I lived among ‘normal’ people? I prefer to keep to the shadows, thank you very much.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah, they might discover you’re a big ol’ softy.” Wilford pulled at Dark’s arm almost playfully.</p><p>“<b><em>I am not-</em></b>” Dark yanked his arm away, and Wilford chuckled. “<b>I’m not soft.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah you are. I’d be willing to bet my bubble pipe on it.”</p><p>“<b>Your </b> <b> <em>what? </em> </b>”</p><p>“Bubble pipe! Y’know, like that Sherlock guy! Smoking’s very…” He trailed off, and his smile faltered. “… I just have a bubble pipe.”</p><p>He wondered if Abe was smoking again while he was out. He knows he hasn’t in a while, but that might be because Wilford was watching him at every move before he stopped. That was a long time ago, anyway.</p><p>Dark’s hands wringed together again, and they both continued walking, entering the forest.</p><p>“I’d get stared at too, sometimes,” Wilford admitted. “You know, the mustache and all.”</p><p>“<b>People aren’t fans of the pink?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“Nah, not really. I’m not shaving it, though.” Wilford answered in a proud tone.</p><p>“<b>Don’t even spare the thought.</b>” Dark smiled a bit. “<b>I think it’s charming.</b>”</p><p>Wilford waved a hand. “You’re just saying that.”</p><p>“<b>I never ‘just say’ anything, Will. You should know that by now.</b>” Dark almost stopped himself as Wilford hopped ahead of him again.</p><p>“Eh,” he shrugged. “I never know for sure.”</p><p>“<b>I wouldn’t blame you,</b>” Dark said, holding back a smile. “<strong>Are y</strong><b>ou doing okay there?</b>”</p><p>“What do you mean?” Wilford asked, hopping over again.</p><p>“<strong>Do you w</strong><b>ant me to slow down?</b>” He teased.</p><p>“I’m okay!”</p><p>Dark slowed down a bit anyways. “<b>Are you tired now?</b>”</p><p>“Nope,” Wilford said. “Not anymore!”</p><p>“<b>You just wanted to get out of the cabin, didn’t you?</b>”</p><p>“<em>You </em> said you’d go somewhere today.” Even though Dark’s pace was slower, Wilford hopped ahead again. “So, yes.”</p><p>Well, he needs to get this sudden burst of energy out somehow, so… might as well let him come along. Dark chuckled quietly. “<b>Very well, then.</b>”</p><p>This will be a nice distraction, at least. The only thing Dark would have to worry about is if Abe would be out and about on the same day…</p><p>Hopefully not.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0036"><h2>36. Avoiding the Obvious Lesson Needing to Be Learned</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What ice cream did you want, again?”</p><p>“<b>Chocolate.</b>”</p><p>“<em>Boring.</em>”</p><p>“<b>It’s the only kind I like.</b>”</p><p>“Chocolate is overrated in <em> my </em> mind.” Wilford opened the door and handed a big carton of chocolate to Dark. “But I like you, so here you go.”</p><p>“<b>Why thank you,</b>” Dark said, somewhat dryly. “<b>I am overcome with many emotions.</b>”</p><p>“Wonder if they have neapolitan…” He wandered over to the freezer section, before gasping comically. “They have a flavor called Unicorn Hair!”</p><p>“<b>Disgusting.</b>”</p><p>“It’s rainbow and it tastes like a birthday cake!” Wilford was practically flapping his hands. Dark sighed.</p><p>“<b>Do you want it?</b>”</p><p>“Not at all, but yes?”</p><p>“<b>… Okay… we can get </b> <b> <em>one </em> </b> <b>carton of the Unicorn Barf…</b>”</p><p>“Unicorn Hair.”</p><p>“<b>I’ll bet it tastes just like vomit.</b>”</p><p>“Ewwwwww.” Wilford was grinning. “They probably would taste the same, though… That’s <em> my </em> bet, anyway.”</p><p>“<b>I’m willing to bet this would offend actual unicorns.</b>”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“<b>You never know if they exist. Such vulgar creatures.</b>” How anyone could say that with a straight face was beyond Wilford. He just shrugged and went with it. “If you say so. I never saw one before.”</p><p>“<b>Neither have I,</b>” Dark said. “<b>That’s why I had to say you never know if they exist a second time just now.</b>”</p><p>
  <em> … Okay…? </em>
</p><p>“<b>Anyway.</b>” </p><p>Dark was walking off down the hallway with his chocolate, and Wilford slammed open the freezer door to grab his Unicorn ice cream. “Wait up!”</p><p>“<b>You’re slow.</b>”</p><p>“At least I’m moving around, right?” Wilford asked, already losing his breath. “I knew you wanted me to, but I didn’t wanna say anything about it.”</p><p>A shrug. “<b>You needed to get out and about. Stop and smell the ice cream, I suppose.</b>”</p><p>Sure, it wasn’t the most exotic of locations- really, just a freezer section of a grocery store- but at least he was outside. That counted for something. Wilford smiled a little bit. “Well, it was pretty fun, anyways.”</p><p>A slam of a door over in the pre-made pizzas area. Wilford glanced up just as someone quietly uttered a curse, shoving a fallen stuffed crust back into the shelf. “Abe…?”</p><p>The detective nearly dropped the pizza again.</p><p>What was <em> he </em> doing here? He was just standing right in front of Wilford, all wide eyed and silent! Do something, man!</p><p>Wilford was standing very still, and Dark was completely out of his mind. He hesitantly waved. “Hi.”</p><p>Abe blinked multiple times. “Hi…”</p><p>“How are you?”</p><p>“I’m fine… you?”</p><p>There goes Wilford’s hope to never hearing the word ‘fine’ ever again. “I’m okay.”</p><p>Abe had a very lonely look to him. Bags were building up under his eyes, and his shirt already looked so splotchy. “That’s good.”</p><p>The two didn’t say anything for a solid minute. Where the heck did Dark go?</p><p>Wilford suddenly felt a poke on his shoulder, and he flinched. “Ah-! Hi!”</p><p>“<b>Wilford, we need to go…</b>” Dark was visibly worried. “<b>Do you have everything you needed here?</b>”</p><p>“Uh- Y- Yeah, I do,” Wilford stuttered. He glanced at Abe, seeing him still standing in front of him. “Uh…”</p><p>Why aren’t you saying anything?!?</p><p>“<b>We know you want to be alone right now, Abraham,</b>” Dark said. “<b>We’re sorry for the inconvenience.</b>”</p><p>Abe didn’t react. “It’s fine. I was gonna go anyway. Sorta knew you guys would be here.”</p><p>Dark held onto Wilford’s arm as the detective left.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Are you alright?</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford couldn’t say or think of anything. It’s understandable.</p><p>“<b>Come on,</b>” Dark said, tugging on Wilford’s arm. “<b>We need to get you a new shirt. Or a sweater, or </b> <b> <em>any</em> </b> <b>thing.</b>”</p><p>“Sweater…”</p><p>“<b>Yeah. Come on, let’s go.</b>” His tone was surprisingly gentle. “<b>This day is supposed to distract you from him for now, okay? We’ll think of something to get your mind off of him.</b>”</p><p>“Okay…” Abe was out of Wilford’s sight in a matter of seconds. “Okay.”</p><p>He looked down. “Oh- my ice cream must be melting already…”</p><p>“<b>Hand it to me,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I’m able to keep it cold.</b>”</p><p>Wilford did so. “Okay.”</p><p>It was a warmer day than usual, so the two would have to be a bit quicker if they don’t want their ice creams to melt so quickly. But Dark is there anyway, so no matter.</p><p>Meanwhile, Abe’s trying not to panic in the aisle. His entire grip on his pizza box was so tight, it was like his whole life depended on holding onto something. He wished he had a cigarette.</p><p>He’ll manage. It’s fine.</p><p>It’s fine.</p><p>
  <em> Stupid, stupid, stupid. </em>
</p><p>Wilford took a deep breath once he and Dark got out of the store, and felt… moderately okay. He knew he wasn’t lying about it once he told Dark a second time. Even if Dark kept glancing over at him.</p><p>“<b>Are you </b> <b> <em>sure? </em> </b>” he asked.</p><p>“Absolutely,” Wilford said. “It was weird, and I almost got sad, but I’m okay. Really.”</p><p>Dark’s eyes narrowed at him for a second. No lies detected. He sighed quietly. “<b>I’ll take your word for it.</b>”</p><p>“Where are we going now?” He tried to sound chipper. It took Dark a second to get accustomed to how hard Wilford tried to sound more “okay” than he was.</p><p>“<b>To find you a new sweater,</b>” Dark said. “<b>This one is practically falling apart on you. Don’t you have a washer?</b>”</p><p>“Nope,” Wilford said. “Not anymore, anyway.”</p><p>Wilford looked ready to wander off, and Dark took his arm again, gently leading him away. Wherever they were going, it was going to be away from here, that was for sure.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0037"><h2>37. NEW SWEATER?! (not clickbait)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I’ve been wanting to get a top hat for a while, I dunno why.”</p><p>Wilford was trying on different hats they’d bought in front of a broken mirror. “Do you think it makes me look silly?”</p><p>“<b>Of course not. It looks better when you wear your glasses with it, though.</b>”</p><p>“Hold on, let me…” Wilford grabbed all of the hats and piled them up on his head all at once. He made a silly smile, trying to strike a pose while keeping the hats balanced. “Eh? Eh?”</p><p>“<b>Well, now I’m afraid to say,</b>” Dark said, leaning against the wall.</p><p>“I look amazing, don’t I?” Wilford asked. Dark snickered, clearing his throat.</p><p>“<b>Just </b> <b> <em>perfect,</em></b>” he said.</p><p>They were doing very well with this whole “distracting thing”. Wilford shook his head, and the hats thumped on top of a box he <em> also </em> bought. “Speaking of perfect, any idea where Charlotte is?”</p><p>Awwwe.</p><p>“<b>Probably hunting some birds or something,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Usually hawks.</b>”</p><p>“She hunts hawks?”</p><p>“<b>Yes. She likes the big ones. Or bears, she loves those.</b>”</p><p>Whaaaaaa-</p><p>“What???”</p><p>Dark chuckled. “<b>You didn’t believe me when I said Charlotte was ruthless, so I figured this was a nice time to actually say so.</b>”</p><p>“She can be ruthless and a sweetheart- a ruthless sweetheart! Charlotte Iplier, the ruthless sweetheart!!!”</p><p>“<b>Make sure the last two are capitalized,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Or else it’s not official.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte Iplier, the Ruthless Sweetheart. Now <em> that’s </em> perfect. Wilford cackled.</p><p>“What a doggo.”</p><p>“<b>... Indeed.</b>” <b> <em>Where do your words come from??</em> </b></p><p><em> My imagination. </em> Wilford smiled.</p><p>
  <b> <em>But why- you know what, never mind.</em> </b>
</p><p><em> Okay! </em>Wilford plopped a green-ish gray beanie on his head, and he pondered for a second. “Mmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnnn- nah.”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>”</p><p>“Why’d I get this beanie?” Wilford asked, taking it off. “Was it an impulse thing?”</p><p>He <em> was </em> pretty excited once he and Dark found the holy grail of clothes at the store. “<b>… No…</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged, and tossed the beanie on the pile of other hats. “Eh, it’s a hat. Hats are hats.”</p><p>“<b>It looked nice on you, though.</b>”</p><p>Wilford tossed on a tiny red propeller hat, and it spun obnoxiously. “This is even better, honestly-”</p><p>Dark could not hold back a snort. “<b>You look like a five year old.</b>”</p><p>“A well dressed five year old, mister fashion police.” He spun the propeller multiple times. “What would happen if I just start flying?”</p><p>“<b>You start flying,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Maybe Charlotte would mistaken you for a hawk.</b>”</p><p>The propeller stopped spinning, and Wilford looked at Dark with his jaw dropped. “<em>No! </em> Why would you say that?!”</p><p>“<b>Because it’s funny.</b>”</p><p>“No it isn’t!” Wilford tore off the hat and dropped it on the pile. “Not at all!”</p><p>“<b>I’m sorry, Wilford,</b>” Dark smirked. “<b>I just </b> <b> <em>had</em> </b> <b> to.</b>”</p><p>Pfft.</p><p>Wilford pouted a little bit, grumbling. “You’re a fucking comedian,” he said dryly.</p><p>Dark looked honored. “<b>Thank you. I try.</b>”</p><p>Wilford continued grumbling while rummaging through the pile of hats. A dark blue sweater was at the bottom, and his head tilted. This isn’t a hat!</p><p>“<b>That’s </b> <b> <em>literally</em> </b> <b> why we went looking for clothes today,</b>” Dark said. “<b>The sweater you’re wearing right now looks like it hasn’t been stitched up or cleaned in ages.</b>”</p><p>Well… it’s true, but he shouldn’t have said it. Wilford loved this old pink sweater! Old Reliable, he’d call it! That’s why the hood was torn off of it… for some reason Wilford couldn’t quite remember, but he knew he ripped it off for a good reason! He’d never have damaged something so sentimental if it wasn’t intentional… </p><p>Kinda like Abe and his car. Except Abe still sometimes forgets that there’s a briefcase or a Starbucks coffee cup on the top of it when he’s driving sometimes.</p><p>Because he forgets stuff just as easily as Wilford can.</p><p>Dark snapped his fingers in front of Wilford’s nose. “<b>Will? You with me?</b>”</p><p>“Huh-?! What?” Wilford blinked, flinching slightly. “Yeah! I’m- I’m okay! Sort of lagged out for a second there…! I’m sorry.”</p><p>“<b>It’s alright,</b>” Dark said, his voice already going soft. “<b>Just checking.</b>”</p><p>“Wanna go back to trying on clothes and pretending nothing’s wrong?”</p><p>“<b>I hate the way you worded it, but… yes. I do.</b>”</p><p>Wilford made a small and almost understanding smile. “Okay. Sorry.”</p><p>“<b>No need to be,</b>” Dark said. “<b>It happens.</b>”</p><p>“Not a problem.”</p><p>They both turned back to the sweater, and Wilford held it in front of him, peering at it strangely. It had a tiny lighter blue eagle around the heart, and Wilford pursed his lips. “… I don’t want it.”</p><p>He felt a little tired, but not… sleepy. Just kind of sad.</p><p>“<b>Are you sure?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“Yeah, I… I already have a good one.” The good one is old, though… Wilford shook his head, almost forcing a smile. “I can save this for if I <em> really </em> need it!”</p><p>Dark nodded. “<b>I understand.</b>”</p><p>Wilford set the sweater on the box, pushing it as far away from him as he could. Definitely not dramatic at all.</p><p>He sort of hated to admit it, but yeah… this sweater <em> was </em> getting a bit old, huh? The shade of pink wasn’t as bright as it was before. You could say it’s a good thing, because it would be blinding when Wilford would be standing in the sun with it on… at least, that’s what Abe said. It used to be, like… neon pink. Burn-your-retinas neon pink.</p><p>Stitches were loose, the hoodie strings were tied into bows multiple times and were worn out, and the sleeve cuffs were just torn straight off one day.</p><p>… Man, he was old.</p><p>Wilford huffed a little, and his shoulders drooped a little bit. Dark noticed this, sitting still.</p><p>“<b>It’s okay to think about him, you know,</b>” he said.</p><p>There was a small pause, and Wilford glanced at the new blue sweater. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”</p><p>“<b>You know </b> <b> <em>exactly</em> </b> <b> what I’m talking about,</b>” Dark said. “<b>And that’s okay.</b>”</p><p>Wilford picked at his sleeves a bit. “… What if he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore? I hurt his feelings… he’s got to be very upset.”</p><p>Dark gently reached out to put a hand on his shoulder. “<b>You know- I read his mind back there, at the store. He misses you a lot.</b>”</p><p>“Then why did he hardly say anything?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>I’m sure he was very embarrassed.</b> <b>Both of you were kind of caught off guard.</b>”</p><p>Wilford tried not to look at Dark, and glanced at the fireplace. Abe <em> did </em>seem a little freaked out at the grocery store, especially when they were leaving.</p><p>It could have been worse… but it also could have been a lot better. A little bit. Maybe. Wilford sort of expected Abe to look like a complete mess after they last spoke anyway. It’s been a long time since Abe was alone, looking like that.</p><p>… He’d smelled a bit like smoke, Wilford remembered. He quickly figured it wouldn’t matter if he wasn’t there. Abe can’t die, but still. However he coped wasn’t any of Wilford’s business, right?</p><p>… Right?</p><p>Right. And when Wilford is right, he’s right. And he’s right.</p><p>He shifted uncomfortably. “Yeah… yeah, I guess that makes sense.”</p><p>They didn’t speak for a moment, and Dark turned towards the fireplace with a sigh.</p><p>“… Why is it never lit?” Wilford wondered. “Even when it’s cold?”</p><p>Dark spasmed so violently that Wilford thought he was having a stroke, and the being had to clutch his chest for a moment to catch his breath.</p><p>“Are you okay?!?” </p><p>A small nod, paired with a small shudder. “<b>Sorry, I… I don’t like to think about it all that much.</b>”</p><p>Wilford immediately made him sit down on the chair, with Wilford on the floor next to him. “I’m <em> so </em> sorry-”</p><p>“<b>I know,</b>” Dark said, almost growling. “<b>… I know you are. You didn’t mean it. It’s alright.</b>”</p><p>“I won’t ask about it again if it’s that bad.”</p><p>“<b>You didn’t know. I didn’t say anything about it.</b> <b>It’s fine.</b>” Dark wanted to stop himself before he finished, but no going back to replace that <em>one</em> word. “<b>… I’m sorry. You know what I mean.</b>”</p><p>“I’m okay,” Wilford said, seemingly not affected. “Are you?”</p><p>Dark cleared his throat, seeing that his hands were shaking. At least most of the panic died down. “<b>I am, thank you.</b>”</p><p>They both sighed softly. The cabin felt a smidge less cold.</p><p>Wilford kept glancing up at Dark and at the sweater on the floor multiple times. He couldn’t really bring himself to make a decision.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Teetering on the edge, like usual. You never could make a good decision for the life of you. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You’re one to talk. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford blinked. These two new voices didn’t seem as invasive as usual. It was more like a side conversation than anything.  The voice that sounded more familiar than any of the others also sounded… suspiciously just like him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Don’t act like you’re so much better than me. You can hardly act like a grown-up as it is. </em>
</p><p><em> At least I don’t spend my entire life acting, my good </em> <b> <em>sir.</em> </b></p><p><em>Oh, bra-</em> A sarcastic little clap <em>-</em><em>vo! </em>Another little clap.<em> How you </em><b><em>wound</em></b><em> me!</em></p><p> </p><p>Dark started growling again, very hoarsely, gripping at his hair.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He’s RIGHT here, I can feel it. </em>
</p><p><em> How is Will so </em> <b> <em>oblivious</em> </b> <em> to this?! </em></p><p>
  <em> You know he doesn’t remember… </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford shifted, sighing a little. “Getting that headache thing again?”</p><p>Dark’s grip loosened, and he looked down at Wilford for a moment. “<b>Surprised you remember that.</b>”</p><p>“I don’t <em> always </em>forget everything,” Wilford said, smiling. “I try not to, anyway.”</p><p>They shared a smile.</p><p>“<b>You try more than I first thought you would,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I don’t know how you do it.</b>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged lightly. “I dunno how, either. I just try. Oddly.”</p><p>“<b>You </b> <b> <em>are </em> </b> <b>an odd one.</b>”</p><p>“I keep you on your toes. We can’t have things too routine, can we?”</p><p>“<b>I suppose not.</b>”</p><p>In Wilford’s mind, the two voices continued to bicker, seeming like even more of an afterthought. Dark pretended not to notice.</p><p>“… You think Charlotte should have come back by now? It’s getting a little late.” </p><p>They both peered out the window. No ginormous dog in sight. Only trees. </p><p>“<b>She’ll come back when she gets full. It may be longer still, or no time at all.</b>”</p><p>Dinner usually took a while for her. “<b>I just let her do what she wants…</b>”</p><p>Wilford raised an eyebrow at that, and Dark added, “<b>But only most of the time. She </b> <b> <em>is </em> </b> <b>vicious, when need be.</b>”</p><p>Again with the ‘vicious dog’!</p><p>“I still refuse to believe she’s like that,” Wilford shuddered.</p><p>“<b>You just haven’t seen her in action,</b>” Dark said, smirking lightly. “<b>I won’t say anything of it, but she </b> <b> <em>is</em> </b> <b> rather helpful when we’re out hunting.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s head tilted at that. “You never said you’d hunt before.”</p><p>“<b>I just did,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Charlotte and I hunt every few weeks. Not for food, or anything. I honestly don’t </b> <b> <em>need</em> </b> <b> to eat.</b> ” Wilford stared at him. “ <b>That doesn’t mean I don’t </b> <b> <em>enjoy </em> </b> <b>food.</b>”</p><p>“I mean…” Wilford started muttering, but his voice raised the more he spoke. “You’ve kept a stash of yogurt for me when my throat was dead. And you love chocolate.”</p><p>The being waved a hand.“<b>‘Love’ is a strong word, but I do like it enough to… okay, I guess ‘love’ </b> <b> <em>is</em> </b> <b> a good word for it.</b>”</p><p>A little smirk from Wilford. “What do you hunt for, then?”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Come on, I stopped poaching a MONTH ago! I’m pretty sure you still have that one fur coat I gave you! Why don’t you just burn that thing? </em>
</p><p><em> I can’t just part with a present </em> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <em> gave to me! </em></p><p>
  <em> Would you two give it up already?!? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark’s aura flared.</p><p> </p><p><em> S </em> <em> o </em> <em> r </em> <em> r </em> <em> y </em> <em> ! </em> <em> ! </em></p><p> </p><p>Wilford shook his head a bit. “… What did I just ask again?”</p><p>There was a small pause, and before Dark opened his mouth, Wilford’s head shot up. He got up from the floor, and sat on a chair… finally. “Oh yeah! You hunting something that isn’t food, what is it?”</p><p>“<b>...</b>” Dark hesitated. “<b>It’s… I don’t think… You remember the person I told you about, and you said you’d chop him into pieces?</b>”</p><p>“Not at all, but go on,” Wilford said, chin on his hand.</p><p>Dark took a slow breath in. “<b>Well, I’ve been looking for him, ever since my creation.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Don’t press any details… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t worry. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>He’s done a lot of bad things to good people,</b>” Dark said. “<b>So I figured I’d look for him in order to stop what he started.</b>”</p><p>“Ah. How noble of you.”</p><p> </p><p><em> What a goddamn hero </em> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <em> must be. </em></p><p>
  <em> I am, honestly! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Yay… remind me to sing your praises the next time you’re drunk off your ass, hmm? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>I’ve been failing to catch him for a while,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I figured I’d take a break, thinking I’d be going delusional. I </b> <b> <em>am</em> </b> <b> thinking of going out to find him soon, though…</b>”</p><p>“Can I help?” This was asked innocently, as if Wilford had <em> no </em> idea what he’d get himself into.</p><p>“<b> <em>N-</em></b>” Dark stopped himself almost immediately. “<b>Maybe… Maybe later.</b>”</p><p>Wilford didn’t look very affected by it. “Alrighty! Let me know when you wanna do that.”</p><p>“<b>Yes,</b>” Dark mumbled, pursing his lips together. “<b>Of course.</b>”</p><p>A little nod, and Wilford went back to staring into space. He let out a small yawn, and looked out the window. He almost flinched back in surprise. “SHE-esh! It’s night already! And Charlotte is still out?”</p><p>“<b>She’ll be alright,</b>” Dark said. “<b>She’s been out </b> <b> <em>much</em> </b> <b> later than this.</b>”</p><p>“Oh… you think she’ll be fine? What if she can’t find her way home?”</p><p>“<b>If she doesn’t come home by the morning, I’ll start looking for her,</b>” he promised. “<b>I remember one time, she’s been out for almost a week, and once I found her, she was completely okay.</b>”</p><p>“Why would she be out that long, though?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“<b>She loves me, but she loves being by herself too,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I don’t want to change that for her at all.</b>”</p><p>“Awww. That’s kind of you.”</p><p>Dark shrugged. “<b>She’s not like other dogs. If she can’t get hurt by anything, she’ll do as she pleases.</b>”</p><p>Wilford yawned again, smiling. “She’s a big girl. She’s got all her priorities straight. Wish I could say the same thing for myself.”</p><p>“<b>You’ll figure things out,</b>” Dark assured. “<b>Eventually.</b>”</p><p>Wilford’s only reply was another yawn, which was <em> much </em> more drawn out than the last one. It almost looked like he was about to lock his jaw open, and that’s the <em> worst </em> feeling you could ever possibly have.</p><p>“You don’t need sleep, right?” Wilford asked, voice going dreary.</p><p>“<b>Not particularly, no,</b>” Dark replied.</p><p>“Oh… okay.” He tried to stifle a yawn.</p><p>Dark chuckled. “<b><em>You </em> </b> <b>can, though.</b>”</p><p>“I think I’ll do that,” Wilford said. He got up from the chair, and hesitantly walked over to Dark’s bed. “It’s okay if I sleep here, right?”</p><p>“<b>Do what you want, Will,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I always found that thing uncomfortable anyway.</b>”</p><p>With an audible flop, Wilford is already knocked out cold, asleep. His glasses were taken off, with his hand holding onto them on the edge of the bed. Dark carefully took them from his hand, placing them on a bedside table.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Past Actor Mark: Teetering on the edge, like usual. You never could make a good decision for the life of you.<br/>Past William: You’re one to talk.</p><p>Past Actor Mark: Don’t act like you’re so much better than me. You can hardly act like a grown-up as it is.<br/>Past William: At least I don’t spend my entire life acting, my good sir.<br/>Past Actor Mark: Oh, bra- (a sarcastic little clap) -vo! (another little clap) How you wound me!</p><p>Damien: He’s RIGHT here, I can feel it.<br/>Celine: How is Will so oblivious to this?!<br/>Damien: You know he doesn’t remember…</p><p>Past William: Come on, I stopped poaching a MONTH ago! I’m pretty sure you still have that one fur coat I gave you! Why don’t you just burn that thing?<br/>Past Actor Mark: I can’t just part with a present you gave to me!<br/>Past Celine: Would you two give it up already?!?</p><p>Past Actor Mark and William: Sorry!!</p><p>Damien: Don’t press any details…<br/>Celine: Don’t worry.</p><p>Past William: What a goddamn hero you must be.<br/>Past Actor Mark: I am, honestly!<br/>Past William: Yay… remind me to sing your praises the next time you’re drunk off your ass, hmm?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0038"><h2>38. Are You My Conscience?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>While watching Wilford sleep was surprisingly very peaceful, Dark couldn’t get rid of this aggravating ringing in his ear. “<b>Ugh…</b>”</p><p>Ironic.</p><p>
  <b> <em>This is getting strange.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I can’t remember the last time Mark’s been this active. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He’s taunting us. We can’t react. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What does this mean for Will…? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark shook his head. <b> <em>I don’t know. But I’ll be wary.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> … Should we warn the detective? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What for? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>No. Not right now. It will just make him paranoid.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p><em> He’s </em> <b> <em>already </em> </b> <em> paranoid. Keeping him out of it will only worry him further. </em></p><p>
  <em> Not yet. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> But- </em>
</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>NOT NOW. </em> </b> Dark cleared his throat for a moment. <b> <em>I will wait until Wilford is willing to be back in his home. Not before.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p><em> … </em> </p><p>
  <em> …  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You just want to spend more time with him. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That’s not a good idea, especially considering- </em>
</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>So? </em> </b>Dark glared down at the fireplace.</p><p> </p><p><em> B </em> <em> u </em> <em> t </em> <em> , </em> <em> W </em> <em> i </em> <em> l </em> <em> l </em> <em> i </em> <em> a </em> <em> m </em> <em> - </em></p><p> </p><p><em>“</em><b><em>WILLIAM IS</em></b><b><em> DEAD. </em></b>”</p><p> </p><p>He flinched at his own outburst, looking over at Wilford. Thank God he could be a heavy sleeper.</p><p>Dark ran a hand through his hair with a long sigh before continuing.</p><p><b> <em>It’s </em> </b> <b> <em>Wilford</em> </b> <b> <em> now. I know we don’t like that he’s changed, but we </em> </b> <b> <em>have</em> </b> <b> <em> to adapt to it. MANY things are happening, and we need to go along.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> This isn’t what we’re for, though… </em>
</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>That doesn’t matter. I’m going to take care of Wilford until he’s happy, I don’t care how long it takes. And it’ll be great. We’re going to find the diamond Wilford misplaced, and we’re going to shatter it in half so we can jab them in Mark’s eye sockets. And it’ll be great. We’re going to do this together. And it’ll be </em> </b> <b> <em>great.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>There wasn’t a response for a minute.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> We’ll do this together. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’s going to be great. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>Good.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> So long as you remember your purpose. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Of course we do. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I think we’re ignoring the obvious. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark sat down on the floor, looking up at the ceiling with a sigh. <b> <em>It doesn’t matter. I’m still going to do it.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You’d better. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark closed his eyes. <b> <em>I heard something about the Mark in Ohio again. He looks similar to the one we’re looking for.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Interesting… </em>
</p><p>
  <em> When do you think we should leave? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>I’ll leave Wilford a note. We’re going tomorrow.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> We can’t just leave him alone! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> At least do it when he’s awake! </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>It will be okay,</b>” Dark whispered. <b> <em>We’ll leave once it’s midnight, and we’ll come right back. He won’t even know we were gone.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What about Charlotte- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What if we get held up- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What if the voices come back to him? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>It will all be okay. I don’t know what will happen while we’re gone, but I know everything will be fine in the end. Leave Wilford a note. Leave for Ohio at midnight. Find Mark and hope it’s the right one. Kill him if it’s the right one. Come back.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> But- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I- </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>No interruptions,</b>” Dark said to himself. “<b>It will work out.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>They were not convinced.</p><p> </p><p><em> That’s what you said </em> <b> <em>last </em> </b> <em> time. </em> <b> <em>Before </em> </b> <em> the cabin. Need we remind you how that worked out? </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>That’s why I said ‘if’ we see the right Mark we’re looking for.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You’re too sure of yourself. We should be careful. At least babysit him. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>Wilford isn’t a baby. We know fully well he’s able to take care of himself… usually. Charlotte will be here by morning, and if Wilford wakes up while I’m gone, he’ll have nothing to worry about if Charlotte is there.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>I</em> </b> <b> <em>F</em> </b> <b> <em>?</em> </b> <b> <em>!</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>“<b>That’s what I said,</b>” Dark mumbled.</p><p> </p><p><b> <em>TAKE </em> </b> <b> <em>HIM</em> </b> <b> <em> WITH </em> </b> <b> <em>YOU.</em> </b></p><p> </p><p>Dark took a deep breath through his nose. <b> <em>He can’t know about all of this right now. He’s dealing with his friend already, I can’t just drop a 90-year-old complex on him when he’s like this.</em> </b></p><p>No response, again. There are two small sighs in Dark’s head.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You’re right. We’ll take your word for it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> He’s going to find out, sooner or later. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>He won’t find out. He can’t.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> There was a time when we said the same about the purgatory. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t care about that. I only care about our friend and his safety. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I do too, but... </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>He doesn’t remember the two of you at all… you know that, right?</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> So? We still care. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> We know we shouldn’t, but… </em>
</p><p><em> We </em> <em> do. </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>And that’s completely understandable. I do too. But what really matters, in this very moment, is finding Mark.</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>It was already almost midnight. All this conscience talk really made time pass. Dark pulled out a piece of paper and a pan from the inside pocket of his blazer.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Wilford - Good morning. Hope you had good sleep. I thought about what you said, about why I’m hunting for the person who you don’t remember. I suddenly got my old roots back, and I’m going to find him. If you wake up to see this, you’ll know why I’m out. I promise, I will be back as soon as possible. I’m hopeful that I’ll find him this time, but I’m also keeping an open mind that I won’t find him at all… which is a bit disappointing for me to think about, but at least I’ll try.</b>
</p><p>
  <b>If Charlotte is still out, don’t worry. She knows not to go TOO far when I’m away. She’ll come straight to you once she realizes I’ve left.</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Wish me luck, and please, keep yourself safe.</b>
</p><p>
  <b>- Dark</b>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark pulled out a piece of tape, and stuck it on the note and on Wilford’s head. He leaned over, kissing his cheek.</p><p>Dark left the cabin, leaving the door locked on the outside. “<b>Let’s go hunting.</b>”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0039"><h2>39. Home Alone :O</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford woke up absolutely alone, with a <em> very </em> long yawn.</p><p>“Good morning… paper?” His eyes flickered, getting the paper off of his face. He squinted at the squiggly lines, and looked around for his glasses. His face bumped against a corner of a desk, and rubbed his cheek. “Ow. That’s new…”</p><p>He reached up at the top of the desk, smudging his glasses. Cue the note. “Ah. Alright…”</p><p>There was scratching heard outside, and Wilford sat up on the bed. “Charlotte?”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Wilford, let me in!</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford tore the blanket off, stumbled over his feet multiple times, and opened the door to let Charlotte in. A wave of nausea suddenly smacked Wilford right on the head, and he fell flat on the floor. “<em> Ow. </em>”</p><p>Cue the concerned whining. Charlotte’s muzzle nudged Wilford on the side, and his hand slapped on the center of her nose. “Got up too quickly. Sorry, Charlotte.”</p><p>Charlotte huffed with her tail wagging. She nudged Wilford again, making him sit up against the wall next to the door. <b> <em>Wanna see what I got?</em> </b></p><p>Before Wilford could even say anything, Charlotte’s mouth opened, and a giant, limp, headless bird slid off of her tongue, landing on Wilford’s lap. He flinched, shoving it off. “AGH!”</p><p>Charlotte sat down in front of him, smiling with her tongue hanging out. <b> <em>I chomped the head off so it wouldn’t have to see me eating the rest of it! I saved it as a surprise for you to see!</em> </b></p><p>Wilford stared at her with wide eyes, clutching his heart. “Okay…! Good girl…”</p><p>Her tail wagged. <b> <em>Where’s Parent?</em> </b> <b>  </b></p><p>Wilford shrugged a little bit, looking over at the bed. “Uh… somewhere? I’m sure they’ll be back soon, they said so in the little note.”</p><p><b> <em>I can tell they’re far away.</em> </b> Charlotte brought a hind leg up, scratching the back of her ear, making it flop around. <b> <em>Maybe they’re hunting the Actor boy again?</em> </b></p><p>Wilford looked up at her, raising an eyebrow. “‘Actor boy’? The guy Dark is hunting is an actor?”</p><p>Charlotte’s leg stopped, and she sat still. <b> <em>I shouldn’t have thought that…!</em> </b></p><p>“Is it a secret?”</p><p><b> <em>Noooooo… </em> </b> <b> <em>yes…</em> </b></p><p>Wilford sat up on his knees. “How big of a secret?”</p><p>Charlotte stiffly licked her nose. <b> <em>Very big? To Parent, it’s a pretty big deal… they don’t like it when other people know about it. But I’m not a people, so I get to know everything!</em> </b></p><p>She seemed to brighten at this. Wilford pursed his lips. “So it’d probably be best not to bring it up, huh.”</p><p><b><em>Absolutely positively. Parent wants that Actor boy REAL badly! That’s all.</em></b> The dog yawned slowly.</p><p>Wilford smirked a little bit. “Are you okay, sweetheart? Do you need a nap?”</p><p>Charlotte’s front paws slid off of the floor, and she flopped down right in front of Wilford and the headless bird. She licked her nose very slightly. <b> <em>Nah.</em> </b></p><p>“Well… what do you want to do, then?”</p><p><b> <em>Parent probably wants us to stay here… but I don’t wanna stay here. That’s boring.</em> </b> She shook herself off a little. <b> <em>Let’s go for a walk?</em> </b></p><p>“You’ve been out all day yesterday, girly!” Wilford exclaimed, hugging a knee. “You must be all pooped out of energy!”</p><p><b><em>Nahhhhhhh. I wanna walk. The cabin’s cold.</em></b> She blinked slowly. <b><em>Plus, Parent wouldn’t want you to be bored, and I’m not allowed to leave you by yourself.</em></b></p><p>Wilford let out a snort so loud that Charlotte’s ears twitched. “Very thoughtful of you, Charlotte. But I think you need to… finish eating that bird… thing.”</p><p>Her jaws immediately unhinged, and the bird was gone in a matter of seconds, tearing through bone, sinew, flesh. The only thing left were a few stray feathers on the floor. He stared at her when she licked the remaining gore from her maw, stifling a burp. </p><p><b><em>… Excuse me,</em></b> she added politely.</p><p>Wilford’s eyes were… <em> very </em> wide. Maybe Dark had a point about the ‘vicious’ thing after all.</p><p>“… You are excused.”</p><p>Charlotte’s tail thumped on the floor, and while she was still lying down, she scooted closer to Wilford. He couldn’t really do anything to make her stop. There was still a little bit of bird blood around her mouth, and she nuzzled closely on Wilford’s chest… basically dirtying the poor Old Reliable sweater even more. <b> <em>Are you still sad about your stupid friend?</em> </b></p><p>Wilford took a deep breath, mostly because Charlotte’s entire muzzle was pressing against his chest, and his entire back was against the wall. “I- try not to be.”</p><p><b><em>I’m sorry you’re sad. I don’t want you to be sad.</em></b> She was trying to be gentle- as gentle as a dog her size could be.</p><p>“I don’t wanna be sad either, girly,” Wilford said, wincing a little bit. “Guess I kind of <em> have </em> to be, right now. I have no other choice but to be sad about my friend.”</p><p>Charlotte grumbled. <b> <em>I don’t like that.</em> </b></p><p>“I don’t like it either.” He patted her ear. “But sometimes it’s better to let people be stupid, either karma will get them, or they’ll sort out their problems on their own… they kinda mean the same thing, but… you understand, right?”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Nope.</em> </b>
</p><p>“Yeah, I figured.” Wilford wasn’t upset about it, though.</p><p>Charlotte’s tail thumped against the floor again. One of her best traits.</p><p>The two lied on the floor with Charlotte’s entire head on Wilford’s criss-crossed legs, both sort of losing track of time that had passed. They knew for sure that Dark wasn’t home yet, though. They also knew that Dark would be home as soon as possible, so… Wilford would have to remember the meaning of the word ‘patience’.</p><p>They both nodded off a few times, before Wilford sighed. His arms and chin were resting on the top of Charlotte’s head. He was looking around the cabin blankly. He knew he’d been in this cabin by himself a few times before, but for some reason, without knowing where Dark is, it made him a bit anxious. The cabin was very small, but it felt so huge.</p><p>Everything was so quiet. Wilford wasn’t aware of it, but he was slowly drifting to sleep. Thank goodness that Charlotte wasn’t moving around, because her head was <em> cozy. </em> Wilford sort of wished he had white noise, but Charlotte’s fluffy company was good enough… until he started dreaming.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0040"><h2>40. Pink Boy Turned Blue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford opened his eyes slowly. He stretched with a yawn, and rubbed his eyes under his glasses. He expected to rest his arms back on Charlotte, but he only slapped his legs. There was nothing in front of him. The cabin wasn’t there either. There was just nothing around Wilford at all, really. He slowly got up to his feet, looking around for… well, nothing.</p><p>“Hullo?”</p><p>The words echoed around the- room? Space? Blackness? “<em>Hullo, hullo, hullo… </em>”</p><p>He took small steps, and bumped his face against an invisible wall. “Ow! Fuck…!”</p><p>“<em>Ow, ow, ow! Fuck, fuck, fuck…! </em>”</p><p>Wilford rubbed his nose, taking a few steps back, only to stumble and land on an invisible… something. It felt like the bed.</p><p>Soft. Cold.</p><p>“Okay…” Wilford mumbled. “Just gonna stay here… and wait until I wake up.”</p><p>He lied down on his back, with his hands intertwined together, looking up at… the ceiling? There’s literally NOTHING here.</p><p>It was a quiet abyss. A void.</p><p>… Honestly, a little peaceful.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Oh, good! Just as I half-promised! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“What the <em> f </em> <em> u </em> <em> ck </em> <em> -? </em>” Wilford flinched and fell off the bed-like surface, only to land on his stomach.</p><p>“You <em> devil,</em>” he muttered, scowling. “The hel <em> l do yo </em> <em> u </em> w an t <em> from me?? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Just to say hello! </em> ” a voice exclaimed. “<em>I said I’d come again as soon as you’d relax! And here you are! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>When did y</em>ou ever say th<em>at? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Oh- pff.</em>” An audible light smack. “<em>Silly! I knew you’d forget. It </em><b><em>is</em></b> <em>what you do best, after all. Don’t bother asking me, you’d forget this conversation an </em><b><em>hour</em></b><em> after this whole thing anyway! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>Will sat up on his knees.</p><p>“<em>Th </em> at <em> ’s just… </em> rude… ” He frowned a little, looking around. “<em>N </em> ic <em> e place… </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Oh, this isn’t my </em> <b> <em>real</em> </b> <em> place,</em>” the voice said. Wilford could sort of imagine an audio wave of the voice swaying all around as he spoke. Warm, welcoming, deep, a bit creepy… condescending? “<em>You have to be </em> <b> <em>awake</em> </b> <em> if you wanna pay an </em> <b> <em>actual</em> </b> <em> visit.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford’s fingers fidgeted. “Don’t know if that’d be a good idea. <em> You never </em> <b> <em>were</em> </b> <em> very fun to be around.</em>”</p><p>He blinked. The hell was that?</p><p> </p><p>The voice simply laughed. “<em>Wow! Didn’t expect </em> <b> <em>that</em> </b> <em> coming from you! Who’s the rude one </em> <b> <em>now? </em> </b>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Ehh… still you.</em>” Will shook his head. “Whuh<em>…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>You know what? </em> ” the voice asked. “<em>I’ll brush it aside. I’ll give you another chance.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>How kind.</em>” He shook his head again, a bit harder than the last time. His glasses almost slid off, but he caught them. “I <em> , a </em> h… Whe <em> re can </em> I fin <em> d you…? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Outside,</em>” the voice said. “<em>Far into the woods. </em> <b> <em>Waaaayyyy</em> </b> <em> far. You’ll find a bunch of dead tree stumps if you walk from the back of the cabin. Then, the woods. Then more woods.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford tip-toed around and almost bumped into another invisible wall. “Sounds strangely ominous… how do I know yo<em> u’re not lying? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I am the world’s </em> <b> <em>worst</em> </b> <em> liar, Will,</em>” the voice said. “<em>It’s just a longer walk than usual, but… You’ll know when you’ve found me. All you have to do is wake up.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I… wh </em>at?”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>What? </em> ” the voice asked. “<em>You </em> <b> <em>do</em> </b> <em> know you’ve been dreaming this whole time, right? </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>I </em> </b> <em> didn’t. He didn’t seem to, either… strange boy.</em>” A hard corner hit Wilford’s stomach, and he cursed. “OW! Fucking- <b> <em>fu</em> </b> <b> <em>ck!</em> </b> <em> W </em> ha <em> t </em> <em> t </em> h <em> e </em> <em> h </em> el <em> l i </em> <em> s h </em> appenin <em> g? </em> !”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>I just TOLD you, </em> <b> <em>boy.</em> </b> <em> You’re DREAMING.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford clutched onto his stomach, almost tripping over himself. “I KNOW that-! I-! I…”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Oh! </em> ” the voice gasped. “<em>You seem to be hurt, Will! </em>”</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t think I don’t know that…?!”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>No, really,</em>” the voice said. “<em>You’re bleeding. Right where your pocket is.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Will looked down… a brownish red was blooming from his sweater’s pocket, slowly creeping up his shirt. He felt sick to his stomach… quite literally. He cupped his mouth with a hand, pulling on a few mustache hairs.</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Hey, it’ll be okay! </em> ” the voice exclaimed. The reassurance <em> almost </em> sounded forced. “<em>All you have to do is wake up.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford brought his fists up to the sides of his head, shutting his eyes and gritting his teeth. “I’m- I’m trying-”</p><p> </p><p>“<em>You can do it, wake up.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Wait- </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<em>Wake up.</em>”</p><p> </p><p>There was a light nudge on Wilford’s back, and he screamed. He landed on the floor, afraid to open his eyes. “Where… where are you…?!”</p><p> </p><p>
  <b> <em>Don’t trust him-!</em> </b>
</p><p> </p><p>“<em>In the forest, Will…</em>”</p><p> </p><p>Wilford took multiple deep breaths, shaking. There was another nudge on his back. He hesitantly opened one eye after the other, and he could see wood. He brought his hands down from his head, getting a feel for the floor. His eyes blinked multiple times, trying to get rid of the stinging feeling building up. “Wha… I…”</p><p>There was a gentle nudge on his side, and he turned to see Charlotte’s huge concerned black eyes.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Wilford…? You were walking all over the place when you were napping! You bumped at the table! Your sweater is bleeding!</em> </b>
</p><p>Weakly, Wilford shifted to sit up. He saw that he was leaning right on the leg of the table. He stared back down to his stomach, seeing the same brownish red blood, already stained dry on his sweater.</p><p>Charlotte whined. <b> <em>Wilford?</em> </b></p><p>“Wha…?” He blinked another few times, looking back at Charlotte.</p><p><b> <em>You look hurt…</em> </b> She whined again. Her nose nuzzled against Wilford’s stomach, which caused a small stabbing pain, making him flinch. “Agh-! Don’t…! Don’t… do that.”</p><p><b><em>You’re hurt.</em></b> Charlotte’s ears drooped.</p><p>Wilford shifted himself again, trying to sit up more straight. He cautiously lifted up the bottom of the sweater and shirt, revealing a small red scar across his stomach. It already looked like it was in the middle of healing itself. He stared at it for a long, long time. He broke out of it by Charlotte trying to lick the tip of his nose. <b> <em>Are you okay?</em> </b></p><p>“I dunno…” Wilford reached out and patted her nose, gently. “I don’t know… I…”</p><p>He glanced over at a small cardboard box with a pile of hats resting on top of it. Wilford bought those hats… some time ago. He didn’t exactly remember when. At the very bottom of the pile, a dark blue sleeve was dangling over the edge of the box. He hesitated to stand up, so he crawled over with his bottom and his feet.</p><p>Wilford reached out to touch it, realizing it was soft. Very soft, actually. It felt new. His free hand felt the texture of his worn out Old Reliable. It was still soft, but it also felt… old. Grimy, loose, smelly, experienced… but old.</p><p>It didn’t feel so comforting anymore.</p><p>Wilford sat still for a moment, looking at the blue and pink sweaters over and over again. He then punched the hats off of the box. Still hesitating to stand up on his own, he snapped his fingers to get Charlotte’s attention. “Help me real quick?”</p><p>She obliged, carefully lifting Wilford’s arms up. His legs were shaking a little bit,  but with her help, he was able to stand. That table corner <em> really </em> did a number on Wilford’s stomach… but he knew that it wasn’t so bad to leave a scar.</p><p>Slowly taking his Old Reliable off, Wilford tossed it at the top of the table. He looked down to see a tiny rip in his shirt, right where his scar was. He frowned.</p><p>… Didn’t his sweater used to have a hood…? Wilford would have to answer his own question later, for he took off his shirt so it wouldn’t stain this <em> brand new </em> sweater. He picked it up by unfolding it, just looking at how simple it was. Wasn’t as bright. Wasn’t as pink. Wasn’t as ripped or stained… at least it had a bald eagle on it. At least it had <em> some </em> kind of design that was intentional.</p><p>Wilford sighed quietly, and Charlotte sat down as he put the sweater on. He slowed down a bit once the bottom trim went near his scar, carefully hovering it over. The mirror on the wall wasn’t a full-body one, but from what Wilford could see… he looked okay. </p><p>… It would all be okay, eventually.</p><p><em> I mean… </em> Wilford thought to himself, trying to smile. <em> I’m still handsome as hell. </em></p><p>Charlotte’s only response was a classic tail-to-the-floor thump. Wilford put his hands in the front pocket, desperately trying not to touch the scar.</p><p>Huh… This is weird. Wilford felt a lump in his old sweater’s pocket for… God knows how long. He picked at it.</p><p>He glanced over to his old sweater, seeing an obvious lump in the pocket. Wilford went over to the table (his legs were still a bit shaky), and pulled out Old Reliable’s hood from the pocket. The hood was stained with blood, almost entirely all over, and Wilford laid it out flat on the table. There was a teeny, teeny tiny bump underneath the hood. He lifted the hood up, seeing a teeny, teeny, <em> teeny </em> tiny red gem with a sharp bottom pointing up, with its flat side on the table.</p><p>“Huh…” </p><p>He picked it up, and it hardly weighed anything at all. It was about the size of his thumbnail, maybe his pinky nail? It fit in the palm of his hand, that’s for sure. Wilford only <em> just </em> noticed that there is a breast pocket on his new sweater, on the other side of the bald eagle. Shrugging, he tore a part of the hood that wasn’t blood-stained, and wrapped the little gem back up, sticking it in the pocket.</p><p>Charlotte rested her chin on Wilford’s shoulder. He smiled a bit, and slowly remembered his dream.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You’ll find a bunch of dead tree stumps if you walk from the back of the cabin. Then, the woods. Then more woods. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You’ll know when you’ve found me. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford looked out the window from the table, seeing a single tree stump that Dark once sat on. He stared off into the distance.</p><p>“Hey, Charlotte…? You wanna go for a walk?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Currently writing chapter 41 &gt;:D</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0041"><h2>41. Catching Mark Failure #(infinite)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sitting in the dark, in front of who seemed to be your mortal enemy (who looked strangely younger) is one thing. Realizing that Dark had just wasted an entire day, only to find that the child had caught him on film again, that’s another thing.</p><p>Shit.</p><p>“<b>This is the </b> <b> <em>second</em> </b> <b> time this has happened,</b>” Dark mumbled, roughly kicking dirt, outside of the boy’s apartment building.</p><p>It could have been <em> so </em> simple. Dark could have just snuck in by phasing through the window, shifting to look like him to intimidate, probably snap his neck, but no. The boy just <em> had </em> to be filming on his dumb computer in the dark, where Dark himself would just <em> happen </em> to be seen. What a waste.</p><p>At least the boy seemed to be making some horror thing. He could write Dark off as a trick of the light, or something. All he was doing was just sitting there, staring at the little camera attached to the computer, so… he must have been filming something, even <em> remotely </em> close to acting, right? Probably?</p><p>Right.</p><p>Strange, strange boy.</p><p>Dark’s hand ran through his hair, and he sighed. “<b>At least I </b> <b> <em>knew</em> </b> <b> I’d fail again. Not a big surprise anymore.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> We told you. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>That you did…</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> At least we didn’t take a plane. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Dark sighed, nodding. “<b>At least.</b>”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What now? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>“<b>I suppose it’s time to go home.</b>” </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> … Yaaaay…  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t complain. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> We’re going home, at least… I’m sorry. I know you’re disappointed, too. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> … Yeah. Yeah, let’s go. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>With one step, Dark closed his eyes, and was in a more familiar neighborhood of apartment buildings. He sighed, rubbing at his temples. “<b>The hell am I doing </b> <b> <em>here? </em> </b>”</p><p>“I was gonna ask the same thing.”</p><p>Dark blinked slowly, with a hint of a frown. He saw Abe on the steps of his apartment, leaning on a stone railing. “<b>… Well. I </b> <b> <em>really </em> </b> <b>didn’t land right.</b>” </p><p>Abe… actually looked a little relieved. “So you didn’t mean to come here?”</p><p>“<b>If you thought I’d come because of Will, no. He’s alright.</b>”</p><p>“Figures.” Abe had his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets, and a lit cigar was in his mouth.</p><p>“<b>… Are </b> <b> <em>you </em> </b> <b>doing alright? Wilford is worried for you.</b>”</p><p>“What does it matter?” He sounded tired. Looked tired, too.</p><p>Dark sighed. “<b>Because the two of you are hurting.</b>”</p><p>“So?” Abe asked, flatly. “I’ve been hurt multiple times before. I’ll get over it. Wilford’ll get over it too. Probably sooner than me.”</p><p>“<b>… You’re giving him a bit too much credit there.</b>” </p><p>Abe shrugged with one shoulder, and he held the cigar between two fingers. “It’s true, though. Wilford will be fine, he’s tough.”</p><p>“<b>That doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about you, Abraham.</b>” Dark almost hesitated to get near Abe, and only just stood on the other side of the step railing. “<b>If Wilford were here right now, he’d hate for me to say it, but he’s been thinking of you. A lot lately.</b>”</p><p>Abe puffed out smoke. “Well, that’s too bad.”</p><p>“<b>And you haven’t?</b>” Dark’s only answer with a narrowed-eyed glare.</p><p>“Does it even matter?” Abe muttered, and he glanced away from the being.</p><p>“I’m not who he wants. I’m not mysterious, I’m not exciting. I don’t have a dog or a cabin near the edge of the woods. I’m… me,” he ended weakly, voice wavering before taking another drag from the cigar.</p><p>A very heavy silence.</p><p>“<b>I don’t see anything wrong with that,</b>” Dark said, suddenly. “<b>Wilford has been around you for a very long time, right?</b>”</p><p>“Since the 70s…” Abe reluctantly answered.</p><p>“<b>And do you really think, after all this time, that someone like </b> <b> <em>him</em> </b> <b> would stick around if he didn’t care about you? Someone with so much energy you could use it to power a city? You’re </b> <b> <em>normal</em> </b> <b>, Abraham. The closest to normal he’s ever known. There is nothing wrong with that.</b>”</p><p>Abe flicked the cigar in front of Dark’s feet. “Pretty sure he got tired of normal once we learned about you. He got tired of normal a <em> long </em> time ago, anyway.”</p><p>“<b>And yet, he’s not tired of you.</b>” Dark gave him a sympathetic look, but turned around to leave. “<b>I will be back later… get some sleep. You look tired, Abraham.</b>”</p><p>He could hear Abe stomping off the steps, and sensed him approaching.</p><p>“Would you STOP-” Abe grit his teeth together, grabbing Dark by the collar to make him face him. “Acting like an asshole and stop using my full name?!”</p><p>Though Abe was acting rough, holding onto the lapels of Dark’s blazer, Dark’s face was calm, not making any reaction. “<b>Any reason why I shouldn’t?</b>”</p><p>“I’m not a goddamn <em> president,</em>” Abe said. “Why do you feel so obligated to call me by that??”</p><p>Dark took Abe’s hands, and gently set them down. “<b>I thought it’d be respectful. You said your name was Abe Lincoln, so I just assumed-</b>”</p><p>“That’s what <em> he </em> first said when he fucking-” Abe’s hands were formed like claws, and he gripped them back against Dark’s chest. He sighed deeply, and Dark swore he saw smoke puffing out of his ears. “Don’t call me by that again.”</p><p>“<b>Okay.</b>” Dark remained still, seeing Abe staring down at the ground until he took his hands off of Dark’s chest. He must have so many things going on in his head right now. Dark opened his mouth and closed it multiple times, hesitating to say something.</p><p>“<b>While I’m still here, I just wanted to say…</b>” Dark slowly raised a finger, and Abe only glared back at him. No going back now. “<b>I’m sorry. For what you’re currently going through.</b>”</p><p>There was a long sigh, and then a tiny, tiny little nod. “Yeah… yeah.”</p><p>He shuffled uncomfortably. “… Thanks.”</p><p>Dark waited for a moment, but there was nothing else. He nodded back, leaving the detective to his thoughts.</p><p>Abe was so, so tired. He kept glaring at Dark as he walked away, and back at his feet. He took a small, slightly shaking breath. “Wait.”</p><p>Dark immediately stopped, turning back to Abe. “<b>Yes?</b>”</p><p>Abe’s mouth was open for a few seconds, and he took another breath. “Is Wilford <em> really </em> that worried?”</p><p>“<b>From what I’ve seen, yes,</b>” Dark answered. “<b>He cried for hours after your fight, and has been thinking of you since you saw each other at that store.</b>”</p><p>“Oh…” A tinge of guilt appeared on Abe’s face. “Is he… eating alright? You didn’t leave him all alone, did you?”</p><p>“<b>Not at first, but he’s getting better. Charlotte’s with him now.</b>” That seemed to cause some relief for the detective.</p><p>“… Thanks. For taking care of him.”</p><p>“<b>Think nothing of it.</b>” Dark said. “<b>I’m just doing what </b> <b> <em>you’ve</em> </b> <b> done for him.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah,” Abe mumbled. “But better.”</p><p>“<b>What?</b>” Dark blinked. “<b>No, Abe-</b>”</p><p>“You said it yourself,” Abe said, hands stuffed back in his jacket’s pockets. “Wilford’s not a kid. I treated him like shit.”</p><p>“<b>You were just stressed. You had much more to worry about.</b>”</p><p>“And you say that as if Wilford wasn’t the main reason I’d have so much to worry about?!” Abe’s tone grew loud. “Back then, Wilford was my top priority, because he’s a goddamn psychopath that constantly needs someone to keep him in check! Now, he’s making out with a fucking configuration of being that apparently knows <em> so much more </em> about Wilford than <em> I </em> do, and that means I’ve got absolutely <em> one </em> less thing to worry about entirely!”</p><p>“<b>Are you </b> <b> <em>sure</em> </b> <b> about that?</b>” Dark asked, calmly, but with brows narrowing down.</p><p>“Yeah, I am!” Abe took a few steps to approach Dark, clenching his fists in his pockets.</p><p>Dark snorted. “<b>What are you going to do, then. Hit me? Complain? Continue feeling sorry for yourself? Poor, poor you.</b>”</p><p>Welp.</p><p>Abe looked ready to snap.</p><p>Dark raised a finger again before Abe could say anything. “<b>Ask yourself this- if it was the other way around, would Will be having this same reaction? Would he have kicked you out and sulked like a child right afterwards?</b>”</p><p>Abe kept his mouth open for a long moment, clearly trying to find some way to retort. His voice was cracking a bit, almost every time he’d try to talk.</p><p>“<b>I thought so.</b>” Dark turned away. “<b>He’s going to want to see you soon… I advise you to get your priorities straight.</b>”</p><p>Abe mumbled something under his breath. “<b>What was that?</b>”</p><p>“‘m not straight, though,” Abe repeated, louder this time.</p><p>“<b>Likewise.</b>”</p><p>There wasn’t any response to that. Dark was pretty sure there was a cricket or two to break the awkward silence.</p><p>“… Oh. Okay, then.” Took him long enough.</p><p>Dark took a small step, and already was hesitating to leave Abe by himself.</p><p>“<b>… Would you like to come over?</b>” He offered. “<b>Get some fresh air?</b>”</p><p>“I-” Abe stopped himself, a few times more than he should. “Just… a walk would be fine.”</p><p>“<b>No cabin, then?</b>” Dark asked. Abe shook his head. “<b>Very well.</b>”</p><p>There was another awkward pause, and Abe shook his head again. He jogged over to stand right next to Dark. “Sorry.”</p><p>“<b>It’s alright,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I figured after you being all by yourself, you’d be… ‘out of it’.</b>”</p><p>“Not that much,” Abe said. His voice trailed off to muttering. “Just a bit.”</p><p>The two started strolling along on the sidewalk.</p><p>“<b>Have you had anything to eat recently?</b>”</p><p>“I don’t need to eat,” Abe said, still muttering. “But if you’re that curious, pizza, ice cream…” A shrug. “Y’know. Unhealthy coping food shit.”</p><p>Dark nodded, and smiled lightly. “<b>Follow me.</b>”</p><p>“Where-”</p><p>“<b>I know a </b> <b> <em>great </em> </b> <b>kebab place. You’re not against eating meat, are you?</b>”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0042"><h2>42. Well, Ain’t THIS Familiar?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Leaves crunched occasionally on the ground. Some of the sounds were heavier than others.</p><p>It was kind of cold, too. Much colder than what Wilford would be used to when he’d go through the woods to visit Dark. And the further in, the less heat there was. Wilford kept himself close to Charlotte, the Ferocious Heater Sweetheart. They walked around for a long time before Wilford started to droop, and the dog picked him up carefully, like a doll.</p><p>
  <b> <em>Are we gonna keep going? You look sleepy.</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> Nah. Let’s keep going. </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>What are we looking for, then?</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford raised a finger, and stopped for a moment. “Ah… I don’t remember… I’m sure we’ll find out, though!”</p><p>The dog huffed out a quiet laugh. <b> <em>All I see is trees... lotsa trees.</em> </b></p><p><em> Well, we </em> <b> <em>are </em> </b> <em> in the woods, my dear. Comes with the name. </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>But trees have leaves and barks and crunchy sticks on them. Wood is the dead block you make doors out of.</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> But what if the wood isn’t dead in the tree? </em>
</p><p><b><em>Then,</em></b> Charlotte’s ear twitched, <b><em>I guess it’d be like a bug. There’s hard crunchems on the outside, and the softer not-dead-yet bits on the inside. I don’t think you could make a door out of a bug, though.</em></b></p><p><em> You could stack them up, </em> Wilford hopped on a tree stump with one leg, spreading his arms open so he could balance himself. <em> Get as many bugs as you can and make ‘em the size of a door! </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>But they could roll around and unstack each other… or just start smelling funny.</em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford shrugged slightly, with his leg in the air wobbling. “We can glue them together and we can wash them.”</p><p>Charlotte huffed out a laugh, her tail wagging. She was glad Wilford was feeling a little bit better.</p><p>Eventually, they walked into a little clearing- full of many, many stumps.</p><p>“Well,” Wilford placed his hands on his hips. “<em>Some</em>one was busy!”</p><p>
  <b> <em>Didn’t you know…? </em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> Know what? </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>Parent used to cut down trees, Wilford. Lots and lots of ‘em. </em> </b>
</p><p>Wilford hopped on another stump. “Was it to make the cabin? ‘Cause that’s some determination!”</p><p><b> <em>Uh…</em> </b> Charlotte stomped on a small branch on the bottom of a different stump. <b> <em>Yeah! Parent was… VERY busy!</em> </b></p><p>“I can tell!” He sounded so impressed. He hopped to another stump, and to another, over and over again. “These make great obstacle courses.”</p><p><b> <em>Yeah…</em> </b> Charlotte’s ears drooped, but kept her tail wagging. <b> <em>Do you think we should go back?</em> </b></p><p>Wilford hopped again. “I wanna see how far Dark went with this! <em> You </em> can go back if you’d like, you’ve been out here before, right?”</p><p>She whined a little. <b> <em>Yeah, but… I don’t think Parent would want you out this far.</em> </b></p><p>“Oh, I’ll be okay,” Wilford waved a hand. “You wanna go back?”</p><p>Charlotte’s front paws crossed together, and she whined again. <b> <em>Mmmmm… yes and no? I wanna be with you if you keep going.</em> </b></p><p>Wilford smiled softly. “Thanks, sweetheart.”</p><p>Charlotte’s smile almost looked a bit forced, but if her tail wasn’t wagging, Wilford could tell she’d be faking. Without getting off the stump, he leaned over to rub Charlotte’s chest with a hard pat. “Onward!”</p><p>They set off again, heading further into the forest. The stumps slowly turned back into trees- dense trees, at that.</p><p>Charlotte seemed to grow uncomfortable, keeping her head down close to Wilford protectively. Her ears were perking at every single little snap and crunch of a branch or a leaf. Wilford seemed to notice this, and reached over his shoulder to pat Charlotte’s nose. “It’s okay.”</p><p><b> <em>I sure hope so.</em> </b> Charlotte looked around in every direction. <b> <em>We should be careful, I don’t like this walk anymore.</em> </b></p><p><em> I’m glad you’re here with me, though, </em> Wilford admitted quietly. <em> It’d be spooky on my own. </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>That’s what dogs are for…</em> </b>
</p><p>He patted her nose again, and Charlotte huffed a little, rubbing part of her cheek against his arm. <b> <em>You sure you don’t know what we’re looking for?</em> </b></p><p>“Absolutely positively,” Wilford said. “I guess we’ll find out when something special happens.”</p><p>And that was when the whispering started.</p><p> </p><p><em> Nearly there now. You </em> <b> <em>can </em> </b> <em> listen to the instructions, you know. </em></p><p> </p><p>Wilford froze, looking back up at Charlotte. “You hear that?”</p><p>Her head tilted. <b> <em>Hear what?</em> </b></p><p>“I heard somebody.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> No need to tell the dog. It can’t hear me, even if you told it to. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford paused to try to say something about that, but shrugged. “It’s probably nothing. These woods aren’t as bad as the other end.”</p><p>Charlotte looked confused, but did a sort of shrug and they began to walk again.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Continue moving forward until the woods start getting darker. </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> That’s… strange. </em> Wilford raised an eyebrow.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> The tree leaves grow in denser bunches there. Less light gets through. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford simply looked around. <em>Ah.</em> <em> Are the trees bigger? </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> No. They’re older and have mostly been untouched. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Wilford peered behind him at the now far-off stump clearing, wondering for a moment how long Dark had really lived here.</p><p>They continued to walk, with little changes for about a half hour.</p><p>Then, the darkness.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0043"><h2>43. Confrontation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was… honestly, <em> really </em> dark. Wilford wasn’t so sure if he had his eyes open or not. “Charlotte… you still with me, sweet girl?”</p><p>An uncomfortable whine was his response. He reached out blindly and felt her nose, and his hand stayed there.</p><p> </p><p>“<b><em>There </em> </b> <em> you are… You’re a tough bastard to get a hold of, boy.</em><em>” </em>A figure emerged from the darkness. Sharp brown eyes, neat hair, a crimson suit so clean it almost seemed to glow. There was something wicked about the way he was smiling… something so familiar, but he didn’t remember why.</p><p>The dog whined loudly, and the red man laughed. “<em>There’s something so curious about animals. So perceptive.</em>”</p><p>“What do you-”</p><p>The red man waved a hand. “<em>Oh, it can’t </em> <b> <em>see </em> </b> <em> me, of course. No one can. Only you… but it still knows I’m here.</em>”</p><p>Wilford found himself unable to reply, still trying to place what was going on. Looking directly at the other man was starting to give him a headache, and he had to glance away.</p><p>“<em>I’ve been looking for you for a long, long time,</em>” he mused, stepping forward. Wilford stepped back, a tiny bit. The red man grinned wider, somehow… it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “<em>A shame the others couldn’t come. I would have </em> <b> <em>loved</em> </b> <em> to see the </em> <b> <em>looks</em> </b> <em> on their faces, but… no matter now.</em>”</p><p>“I-” Wilford stopped himself, and felt his back against Charlotte’s chest. He felt a little rumble, like she was growling. “What are you talking about?”</p><p>The red man chuckled with a little snort. “<em>I was </em> <b> <em>just</em> </b> <em> about to tell you! I’ve come to apologize.</em>”</p><p>Wilford was extremely confused, and it must have shown. The red man continued to inch closer.</p><p>“<em>I was </em> <b> <em>going</em> </b> <em> to lead you to a lake so you’d meet me, but I just got </em> <b> <em>so</em> </b> <em> ex</em><b><em>ci</em></b><em>ted! </em> ” he exclaimed. It was just then that Wilford noticed a long black cane in his hand. “<em>You were just taking too long, so, I had a change of plans- you see, you have something I need… no, something that I </em> <b> <em>want.</em></b>”</p><p>The other man’s eyes gleamed, and for the first time, he looked entirely cruel. His smile dropped completely. “<em>And you should know by now I </em> <b> <em>always </em> </b> <em> get what I want, boy.</em>”</p><p>Wilford’s hands wringed together. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”</p><p>“<em>Oh, you </em> <b> <em>must</em> </b> <em> know,</em>” the Red Man said. “<em>Your memory is faulty but spontaneous, right? </em>”</p><p>“I- I guess…”</p><p>“<em>Good! </em> ” The optimism in his voice sounded forced. “<em>Now, we’re going to stay here, in the middle of </em> <b> <em>nowhere,</em> </b> <em> until you remember what to give me what I asked for.</em>”</p><p>Wilford felt another growl from Charlotte’s chest. <em> It’s okay… </em></p><p>
  <b> <em>No it isn’t. Parent wanted to find this guy forever, he’s RIGHT here, and I can’t see him!</em> </b>
</p><p>The Red Man rolled his eyes. “<em>Don’t listen to that </em> <b> <em>thing,</em> </b> <em> Will. It’ll only distract you.</em>”</p><p>Wilford sighed, and waved his hands around. “Okay, okay… This seems like a lot of pressure you’re putting on just one guy like me.”</p><p>“<em>I mean… you have what I want.</em>”</p><p>“And…?”</p><p>The Red Man looked confused for a second. “<em>I want it! </em>”</p><p>“… <em> And…? </em>”</p><p>“<em>And I </em> <b> <em>want-!</em> </b> ” the Red Man stopped himself, as if he was going to have a tantrum. Wilford swore he saw his eyes glowing for a moment. “<em>Alright. Let me just spell it out for you… literally.</em>”</p><p>Wilford crossed his arms, frowning. The Red Man, quite condescendingly, dragged his finger along as he said a number of letters. “<em>D-I-A-M-O-N-D.</em>”</p><p>Wilford’s frown deepened. “Mnnn… you want me to go steal you a diamond? You trying to propose to someone?”</p><p>“<em>You have it </em> <b> <em>right</em> </b> <em> in your pocket-! </em> ” He looked more than just ‘annoyed’ now. He sighed. “<em>Just look in your pocket, the one on your chest.</em>”</p><p>Charlotte’s growling was drawn out, and she was snarling. With a free hand while the other was digging in the pocket, Wilford rubbed Charlotte’s chest. It didn’t stop her, but it looked like she appreciated the comfort.</p><p>“Is this what you want?” Wilford asked, holding the tiny red gem between his thumb and index finger.</p><p>There was something inhuman about the other man’s smile. It devoured him. “<b><em>Ab-so-lutely.</em></b>”</p><p>“Okay.” Wilford slowly took a few steps forward, as well as the Red Man approaching him. Charlotte urgently nipped Wilford’s hood, stopping him.</p><p>
  <b> <em>What are you doing?! Do you really trust him?! Parent would be so upset-!</em> </b>
</p><p>All Wilford did was look at her. <em> Charlotte, in case something goes wrong, can you be a good girl and find Dark for me? </em></p><p>Charlotte froze for a moment. It looked like she was processing Wilford’s request, and her tail wagged for the first time in what seemed like <em> hours. </em> She licked Wilford’s cheek, and hurriedly ran off into the dark.</p><p>“<b><em>What</em> </b> <em> is taking so long? </em>” the Red Man asked. Once Wilford turned back around to face him, he was inches close, making him back away.</p><p>There was something very wrong about this. He tried to swallow, but his mouth was dry. At least he had a little trick up his sleeve. Once the diamond in Wilford’s hand was hovering over the Red Man’s, he stopped. The Red Man’s smile was uncomfortably expectant. Wilford swiftly held the diamond in the palm of his hand, making it form a protective fist. “I want you to do something for <em> me </em> first.”</p><p>An angry hiss. He couldn’t tell what made it. “<em>Do </em> <b> <em>what.</em></b>”</p><p>Wilford was uncomfortable, yes, but his stall-for-time plan couldn’t help but make him smile cheekily. “I wanna know your name.”</p><p>“<em>You know my name, you stupid boy. You’ve always known.</em>”</p><p>Wilford hummed, holding his fist behind his back. “Hmm! Don’t think I do. Mind if you give me a few hints?”</p><p>“<em>Is this some kind of joke? </em> ” the Red Man asked, gritting his teeth. “<em>What game are you playing? </em>”</p><p>Wilford put up a free hand. “I just want to get to know you! Is that so hard?”</p><p>The Red Man sighed harshly through his nose, with a slight growl. The fist around the cane Wilford noticed earlier was clenching, with his knuckles going from red to white. <em> I hate you. I hate you so </em> <b> <em>fucking</em> </b> <em> much. </em></p><p>Wilford simply pouted. “Oh, that’s not a very nice thing for you to say. Here.”</p><p>He took the Red Man’s hand, and stuffed the diamond back in his breast pocket. “There’s that neato looking ice wall back here with TV static, gimme a slideshow!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0044"><h2>44. A Humble Upbringing to a Tragic Backstory</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“There’s that neato looking ice wall back here with TV static, gimme a slideshow!” Wilford draped an arm around the Red Man’s shoulder, faking a wide smile. The Red Man then gave him such a poisonous glare that he let out a nervous little giggle.</p><p>As Wilford let go, the Red Man stood at the very center of said ice wall that was glowing many shades of teal and cyan, with faint TV static. Wilford sat down with his legs crossed.</p><p>The Red Man glared at Wilford for a long moment with a small snarl. He took a deep breath while closing his eyes, and just as they opened, he grinned widely.</p><p>“<em>My name is Mark! </em>” he exclaimed.</p><p>“Okay…?”</p><p>Images of the Red Man- now Mark- faded in and out in the ice wall. Mark was gesturing as he spoke. “<em>I was once a world famous actor, who had riches and awards galore! I lived in the most </em> <b> <em>wonderful</em> </b> <em> mansion, where I had parties every time a movie would be finished! </em>”</p><p>Pictures of said riches, awards, and parties would swoop by, though Wilford didn’t seem entirely impressed.</p><p>“<em>I had… a </em> <b> <em>very</em> </b> <em> loving family,</em>” Mark continued. “<em>Only having my adopted brother with me, every single day. We had a close friend, and…</em>”</p><p>The joy in Mark’s voice wavered, and Wilford noticed immediately.</p><p>“<em>I just so happened to marry our close friend’s sister,</em>” Mark said. “<b><em>Oh,</em> </b> <em> you would have </em> <b> <em>loved</em> </b> <em> her. She was courageous, and </em> <b> <em>so</em> </b> <em> beautiful.</em>”</p><p>An image of Mark’s love appeared. She was dressed in a black dress with bright red roses trimmed around the bottom, and she had a black veil over her face. It looked like she was at some kind of funeral, but she was smiling. Must be a wedding.</p><p>Wilford blinked once, and stared at the image before it vanished. <em> She looked a lot like… </em></p><p>“<em>But then everything went to shit, to put it lightly,</em>” he said dryly. “<em>I learned that my brother was seeing my wife. She left me. The affair went public, I lost my job, my friends… </em> <b> <em>and it was all his fault.</em></b>”</p><p>Wilford sat still, seeing that Mark was glaring back at him, straight in his eyes. Mark’s face was filled with so much hate for some reason. Wilford looked down for a second. “Did she have any reason to leave?”</p><p>“<em>Absolutely not,</em>” Mark’s answer was almost instant. “<em>She had </em> <b> <em>no</em> </b> <em> reason to leave me all alone like she did.</em>”</p><p>There was a faint smile. “<em>Her brother would visit me </em> <b> <em>constantly,</em> </b> <em> checking up on me, helping me… nothing worked at all. It was none of his business. I told him to stay away from me.</em>”</p><p>“I’m sure <em> that </em>helped, huh?” That was supposed to be sarcasm. Mark’s answer was only a laugh.</p><p>“<em>You know what? </em> ” he asked. “<em>It did! I’ve gotten </em> <b> <em>so much better,</em> </b> <em> after years of complete isolation, I invited my brother and a few friends for a party! Everything went </em> <b> <em>so </em> </b> <em> well! </em>”</p><p>The forced optimism was <em> so </em> clear, but Wilford went with it.</p><p>“<em>I had so many plans. I knew what I needed to do.</em>”</p><p>“I’m sure you did.”</p><p>He smiled, sweetly. “<em>But you remember, don’t you…? You remember what you did.</em>”</p><p>Wilford shook his head. “I’m afraid I don’t.”</p><p>The two were still for a moment. The wall went back to static, and it faded from teal and cyan to a mix of yellow and orange.</p><p>“<em>You like games, right? </em>” Mark asked.</p><p>“Yes…?” Wilford leaned back a bit, with his hands holding onto his legs. Mark approached him with his cane hand, with the very end of the cane pointed at him.</p><p>“<em>I want to show you something.</em>” Mark smiled.</p><p>Staring up at him, Wilford hesitantly held onto the cane, only for him to be pulled up to his feet. Suddenly, everything went pitch black.</p><p>“Mark??” Wilford asked.</p><p>Then, a whole dimly lit room was forming from bottom to top.</p><p>“<em>Let’s play a short game of hide and seek.</em>” Mark was nowhere to be seen. “<em>This was our mansion, brother! </em>”</p><p>“What??” Wilford clenched onto the cane that he just realized he was holding onto. “I- I don’t understand…!”</p><p>“<em>Oh, trust me,</em>” Mark said. “<em>You will.</em>”</p><p>“Where are you??” Wilford asked, looking around. There was a big mirror on the wall with a desk underneath, with it reflecting the front doors of the mansion.</p><p>Shouting was heard from a balcony upstairs. “I didn’t kill <em> any</em>body! This is <em> mad</em>ness!”</p><p>“Oh, you wanna talk about madness?” Wilford only gasped. Was that…?!</p><p>“Abe?!” Wilford immediately found a set of stairs, and sprinted to the very top.</p><p>“Madness is stealing another man’s wife!”</p><p>Wilford ran to where Abe’s voice was coming from, only to see him with a gun against the wall, with two other people in front of him. All three of them were dangerously close to the edge of the balcony.</p><p>One of the two people in front of Abe looked very androgynous, with their skin a multitude of different shades from bright pinkish peach to dark brown. They looked like they were trying to step between Abe and the other man, or grab the other man’s gun out of his hands, only for them to be pushed back protectively.</p><p>“Madness is squeezing him for cash so that you can fund your own sick, sexual exploits with that very woman!” Abe exclaimed, with an angry tone in his voice that Wilford caught as familiar. He ran through the two people in front just to see if Abe could see him. “Abe-”</p><p>“SHUT UP!” the other man shouted. This man had very light tan clothing on, along with a matching pith helmet and dark brown glasses. He also had a <em> huge </em> black mustache. Almost everything about his face was covered, but it was clear to Wilford that he was <em> very </em> angry.</p><p>“Abe, what is this about?!” Wilford asked loudly. From where he was looking, Abe was scowling at him. “Abe!”</p><p>“Madness is plotting the death of your childhood friend, because you CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH-!”</p><p>Wilford heard a loud bang from behind him, and almost felt as if a bullet went right through his chest like some sort of ghost. There was already a huge spot of blood at Abe’s heart, and his whole body went limp. Wilford gripped his hair. “<em>NO! </em>”</p><p>He looked over his shoulder to see the huge mustache man, staring at Abe’s body with his hands shaking, along with his familiar gun.</p><p>Wilford collapsed to his knees, and held onto Abe by his shoulders. “Abe! Abe, can you hear me?! Get up! <em> ABE!! </em>”</p><p>There wasn’t any response. Abe’s eyes were half closed with his mouth hanging open. Everything felt as if it was in slow motion. Wilford shook his head. Abe is gonna be just fine…</p><p>Struggling grunts were heard from behind, and Wilford turned to see the mustache man pulled the trigger on the androgynous colorful person in the stomach. They tipped over the edge of the railing, and fell off the balcony, with the mustache man reaching out too late in an attempt to grab their hand. Their body can be heard hitting the floor harshly, just an audible sad sack of meat and a bone crack.</p><p>The mustache man held onto the railing tightly, dropping his gun to the floor. He quickly looked over at Abe, and back down at the androgynous someone.</p><p>“Shit…” It started off as a whisper, as if he were in shock. “Shit, shit, shit, shit shit shit shit <em>shit shit SHIT </em><b><em>SHIT!</em></b> <b><em>FUCK! </em></b>”</p><p>Wilford watched him run down the stairs with his pith helmet flying off to approach the body. He fell, once, twice. Hit his head against the banister, and stumbled off the foot of the stairs in a daze.</p><p>Wilford was clinging onto the legs of the railing as if he were in a jail cell, looking down at the floor.</p><p>The androgynous colorful person wasn’t moving. A wet, metallic-smelling liquid was oozing out, too dark to be blood.</p><p>“My friend… my friend, can you hear me…?” The mustache man had finally reached them, and crouched down to touch their shoulder and check their pulse. “Please- please, say something- <em> any</em>thing, <em> please-</em>”</p><p>Wilford grit his teeth together, hearing the man start crying.</p><p>The other man took a long time to compose himself, and still let out the occasional sob and gasp over the next few minutes. Eventually, he wiped at his eyes and took off his jacket, draping it over the body.</p><p>“It wasn’t supposed to be like this…” His voice was very hoarse, and Wilford’s grip on the legs of the railing loosened. The other man looked up the stairs to where Abe lay prone, which set him off into a crying fit once again.</p><p>Wilford swore he almost felt himself start to cry as well. He wasn’t so sure. He watched the man lean over and hug the body tightly, not caring to stain his clothes at all.</p><p>Wilford’s grip on the railing was completely gone, which led a confused look. “Huh-?”</p><p>He was leaning over the very edge of the balcony, and attempted multiple times to grab hold of the railing again. But just like the bullet from earlier, everything went through his arms like he was a ghost. “Agh-! No, no, no! No!”</p><p>Wilford dove head first as he fell off the balcony, and landed on the floor by the back. His feet stomped against the floor as he sat up with his hands gripping the back of his head, wincing. “Mmmmnnnnggggh…!”</p><p>Wilford squinted his eyes open to see the mustache man cradling the androgynous body in his arms.</p><p>“It was an accident,” the man said. “I <em> swear…</em>”</p><p>“Who is this guy supposed to be?” Wilford asked.</p><p>Quiet sniffles. He could hear very faint laughter.</p><p>“<em>Do I still have to spell it out for you? </em>”</p><p>“Yes,” Wilford said. He then felt a hand-like grip on his shoulder, yet nothing was there. Mark’s voice was very close.</p><p>“<em>You were someone I once called a brother,</em>” he said. “<em>You had </em> <b> <em>no</em> </b> <em> idea what was coming to you.</em>”</p><p>“What…?”</p><p>“<em>Shh! Here comes my favorite part! </em>”</p><p>“I’m so sorry.” The man held the body on top of his lap. “I should have done more. I shouldn’t have come here.”</p><p>“<em>Here it comes…! </em>”</p><p>Another round of the man crying, more longer and drawn out than the last.</p><p>“<em>AH! </em> ” Mark exclaimed. “<em>I still get goosebumps! And this is the 50th time I’ve watched this! Talk about character development from the world’s worst brother and one of the worst villains I’ve ever met! </em>”</p><p>There was a small pause. The sound of the man’s crying faded out, and all Wilford could do was sit and watch.</p><p>Everything went pitch black again, the man crying over the dead body just being an image on the cracked ice wall. Mark was smiling, with the cane back in his hands again. Wilford was still sitting, with a lot and confused look.</p><p>“<em>Though, I really would have to thank you for killing that dumb district attorney, whatever the hell their name was,</em>” Mark said, approaching Wilford again. “<em>Because if you didn’t, I wouldn’t have had the most </em> <b> <em>perfect</em> </b> <em> villain in order for my story to continue.</em>”</p><p>“The hell is that supposed to mean??” Wilford asked, not taking Mark’s second offer of helping him up with the cane.</p><p>Mark chuckled. “<em>Oh, well, I don’t want to ruin any </em> <b> <em>surprises,</em> </b> <em> but let’s just say there lives…</em>” He intertwined his fingers together. “<em>…an </em> <b> <em>amalgamation</em> </b> <em> of sorts, that you seem to be very close to.</em>”</p><p>An image faded on the ice wall, glowing from black to gray to white. Little red and blue highlights were on the edges of the image, and it happened to be Dark.</p><p>Wilford got up to his feet, looking up at the image with his jaw slacked. “That’s Dark…”</p><p>“<em>Circle takes the square~! </em>” Mark sang, waving his cane around in a circular motion.</p><p>Wilford backed away slightly. “Why are you doing this? What does this have to do with me?”</p><p>“<b><em>Everything, boy.</em></b>” Mark frowned suddenly. His eyes began glowing, violently red. He suddenly appeared right in front of Wilford, only to grab him by the collar and begin to shake him. “<b><em>You</em> </b> <em> are the reason my wife left, </em> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <em> are the reason the party went downhill, </em> <b> <em>YOU</em> </b> <em> are the reason that Damien and Celine are dead, </em> <b> <em>YOU</em> </b> <em> are the reason you don’t remember anything, </em> <b> <em>YOU are the reason I am still thriving, YOU ARE THE REASON FOR </em> </b> <span class="u"><b> <em>EVERYTHING!!!</em></b></span> ”</p><p>Wilford gripped on Mark’s arms, trying to hold him back. “Then-! Why do you want the diamond?!”</p><p>“<b><em>IT WAS MINE!!</em> </b> ” Mark shouted. “<b><em>I PROPOSED TO HER WITH IT! IT WAS </em> </b> <span class="u"><b> <em>HER</em></b></span><b><em>RING! NOW, </em> </b> <span class="u"><b> <em>GIVE ME THE FUCKING DIAMOND!!</em></b></span>”</p><p>Wilford then suddenly remembered what Abe said.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “</em>
  <em>Madness is plotting the death of your childhood friend, because you CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH-!</em>
  <em>” </em>
</p><p><br/>“<span class="u"><b><em>GIVE ME THE FUCKING DIAMOND!!</em></b></span> ”</p><p>
  <em> … No. </em>
</p><p>Wilford shut his eyes tight, shoving Mark off. “<em>N</em><em>O</em><em>. You</em> tried to kill me! <em>You </em>need to learn to control your damn temper!”</p><p>“<b><em>I DON’T HAVE A TEMPER, WILLIAM!</em> </b> ” Mark screamed. “<b><em>THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! YOU TOOK CELINE AWAY FROM ME! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH SHIT YOU PUT ME THROUGH!</em> </b>”</p><p>Wilford growled. His throat felt hoarse, but he didn’t care, not one bit. Something else in his voice sounded different, though.“<b><em>YOU</em> </b> <em> NEVER DESERVED </em> <b> <em>CELINE!</em> </b> <em> YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH SHIT YOU PUT </em> <b> <em>HER </em> </b> <em> THROUGH, BECAUSE YOU WERE NEVER HOME IN THE FIRST PLACE!!! </em>”</p><p>He growled again, rubbing his temples. His voice was wavering all over the place. “Agh… And… And what the hell do you expect me to do?! You got all spiteful because <em> I </em> appa rently ‘<em>st </em> <em> ole</em>’ your wife away from yo u! But you don’t even s eem like a nice guy, at all! T his must be <em> Y </em> <em> OUR </em> fau lt because of the w ay <em> YOU </em> reacted!”</p><p>Mark’s knuckles went from red to white with his fist clenched onto the cane. “<b><em>You don’t understand! You can’t tell me this shit when you CLEARLY know that this is your fault!</em> </b>”</p><p>“It’s <em> NOT! </em>”</p><p>And that was what finally tipped him over the edge. Mark stared at him coldly.</p><p>“<em>You know what,</em>” he asked flatly. “<em>I tried to be friendly-like. I played nice. But I guess every hero has to go against their moral compass.</em>”</p><p>“You’re not a hero! This isn’t some fairy tale, Mark! People have <em> died! </em>”</p><p>Mark held his cane by the foot end. “<em>They always come back.</em>”</p><p>He held the cane back like a baseball bat, and swung the gem end of the cane against Wilford’s cheek, making him stumble.</p><p>“<em>But once I have my way with you, </em> <b> <em>brother…</em></b>” He smiled. “<b><em>…</em> </b> <b> <em>You won’t.</em></b>”</p><p>Another swing around, with the gem end bashing around Wilford’s nose, knocking him over to the floor.</p><p>“Agh…” Wilford’s hands went up, grabbing the cane once it hovered over his throat. “Mark…”</p><p>“<em>I’m gonna hang your head up on a mantle-</em>” Mark swallowed, and there was a feverish excitement on his face. “<em>-and burn the rest of you… slowly…</em> <b><em>So</em></b><em> many people will adore me. It’s going to be as it should be. </em><b><em>It’s gonna be beautiful.</em></b>”</p><p>Wilford’s struggle to hold the cane back wavered, shutting his eyes tightly.</p><p>A loud bark was heard.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0045"><h2>45. A Dog’s Perspective</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford was in danger.</p><p>He was in danger, and Charlotte had no idea where Parent was.</p><p>Safe to say, she was panicking a little. </p><p><b> <em>Gotta find Parent… gotta find Parent to help Wilford- gotta help Wilford because we found the Acting Boy. </em> </b> <b> <em>The Acting Boy wants to hurt Wilford… </em> </b> <b> <em>Don’t know why he does.</em> </b></p><p>Her head was glued to the ground, sniffing the grass and dirt in multiple directions. Mostly just smelled like… wet.</p><p>Where was Parent, where was Parent… hopefully, Charlotte wouldn’t end up in a different state because Parent <em> was </em> looking for the Acting Boy earlier. Who knows where they could be?</p><p>Her nose bumped against a trash can, tipping it over. She sniffled all around at the junk that toppled over each other, and snuffed her muzzle in the entire trash can.</p><p>… Yucky. She jerked back, sneezing several times. She shook her head with her ears flopping all over the place. <b> <em>Gotta find Parent…</em> </b></p><p>She stepped over the can, and started to run back to the cabin. Maybe Parent was back there. If Charlotte had fingers, she’d cross them.</p><p>Once she arrived at the cabin, she scratched the door with her claws. If Parent was home, they’d immediately open the door. Nothing. She peeked in through the windows, and the whole cabin was empty. Impatiently, Charlotte’s legs bounced with her tail underneath her stomach.</p><p>No lights. Curtains weren’t drawn. Parent was still out.</p><p>She whined, turning away from the door and starting to pace around the cabin.</p><p><b> <em>… Parent’s out, can’t find Parent. </em> </b> <b> <em>Gotta help Wilford, but I can’t find Parent. </em> </b> <b> <em>Where do I go…? </em> </b> <b> <em>Gotta find help, help for Wilford, but Parent’s not home and I don’t know where-</em> </b></p><p>Charlotte stopped pacing.</p><p>
  <b> <em>… I can’t find Parent, but I can find help.</em> </b>
</p><p>She turned around so quickly that huge chunks of grass got ripped, and she began to run. <b> <em>Gotta find help, gotta find help, got to!</em> </b></p><p>Sprinting through the field and through the woods, Charlotte looked straight, sniffing all around. She couldn’t quite remember the route, but she knew it was near the city. She ran for a long time.</p><p><b> <em>Gotta find help, gotta find help, got to-!</em> </b> She stopped herself by skidding across the ground. Her nose picked up a smell from not-so-far. Her ears pricked up, and she panted for a moment before she started smelling the ground again.</p><p>Parent had put on some cologne this morning, and she could pick that up from here. Smelled a bit like spearmint, and… maybe some clover. Kinda like a spicy toothpaste.</p><p>
  <b> <em>If Parent went this way… then… </em> </b>
</p><p>This was the path to Wilford’s apartment, where the Stupid Friend lived. Parent was visiting the Stupid Friend…? Charlotte’s nose scrunched up.</p><p>Worry about that later. The more help, the better.</p><p>She arrived at the abandoned complex about ten minutes later. People had stared at her when she ran past them, but she didn’t care. Her claws scratched against the bottom of the door, in the same way she would with Parent’s door. She could hear some chatter from an open window.</p><p>“<b>He offered you to dance with him, </b> <b> <em>right</em> </b> <b> after you hallucinated that gunshot in your heart??</b>”</p><p>“Yeah, it was real weird… Sorta went with it, though. I figured if I arrested him again, it’d start all over again. So…”</p><p>A little laugh. “<b>But you </b> <b> <em>liked </em> </b> <b>it. I bet that was fun.</b>”</p><p>“It was,” Abe said. “You know what he’s like. All goofy, like a puppy. He’d make these little trinkets for me, like friendship bracelets, and would take polaroid pictures of us wherever we went. You would have liked the afro. Or burned it.”</p><p>Charlotte could hear Parent cringe. “<b>I don’t like the image of that at all.</b>”</p><p>“What, the afro itself, or the thought of a burning wig?”</p><p>“<b>Afro.</b>”</p><p>“Well, whenever he took it off, his hair was fluffy anyway. Kinda liked that better than the afro, but I didn’t say anything.”</p><p>She could practically <em> hear </em> her Parent smile. “<b>I think you would have liked him when he was younger.</b>”</p><p>… As much as Charlotte liked this, she had to interrupt. She began barking, loudly. The chatter stopped for a moment.</p><p>“Was that…?”</p><p>“<b>Hold on.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte saw the window open all the way, and Parent’s head popped out. “<b>Charlotte…? What are you doing here?</b>”</p><p>“What <em> is </em> she doing here?” Abe’s head popped out the window as well, underneath Dark’s. She continued to bark loudly.</p><p><b> <em>Parent! Come out!</em> </b> Her front paws hopped up each time she barked. <b> <em>Wilford’s in trouble! We went for walkies and he found the Acting Boy, and-</em> </b></p><p>“What did you just say?” Abe asked, voice serious.</p><p>“<b>You found </b> <b> <em>who??</em> </b>” Dark asked.</p><p><b><em>He’s! In! Trou-! -ble! Ac-! -ting! Boy!</em></b> Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark.</p><p>Abe’s head disappeared, and bolted from the window to the door. “What happened? Where is he? Is he okay? Of course not, you just said he’s in trouble- Can you take me- us- there?”</p><p>Charlotte backed away slightly by the amount of questions Wilford’s Stupid Friend was giving her. Dark arrived from behind, putting a hand on Abe’s shoulder. “<b>Charlotte… can you please take us to him? Quickly?</b>”</p><p>She backed away, and they both got outside.</p><p><b> <em>We were walking in the woods after the stump field, a- and…</em> </b> Charlotte saw the shocked look on Parent’s face, and her ears drooped.</p><p>“<b>You’re not saying you both </b> <b> <em>actually</em> </b> <b> went through that stump field…</b>” Dark said.</p><p>“What stump field?” Abe asked. “Take us there!”</p><p>Charlotte sat down slowly. <b> <em>I told him it was a bad idea. I’m sorry, Parent…</em> </b></p><p>A sigh. “<b>It’s alright. There’s nothing you can do about it now.</b>”</p><p>“Yes there is,” Abe said. “We can do something right now, we gotta go save Wilford!”</p><p><b> <em>That’s what I came here to tell you guys about!</em> </b> Charlotte’s tail wagged, and quickly stopped… was her tail wagging for Stupid Friend?! That’s the worst wag Charlotte could ever possibly have! She stood up to her feet. <b> <em>Wilford is in trouble, and we gotta save him! Let’s do the thing that Wilford’s stupid friend said for once!</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Wait- Charlotte!</b>” Dark exclaimed, getting her to lower her head to him. “<b>You didn’t end up at the lake… did you?</b>”</p><p>Charlotte’s eyes wandered as she thought. She shook her head. <b> <em>Not from what I remember. It got really dark when we saw Acting Boy.</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Then we have to hurry,</b>” Dark said. He climbed up on Charlotte’s back, and offered his hand to Abe.</p><p>Huh. From what Charlotte remembered, Parent and Stupid Friend didn’t get along so well. Maybe while they were talking, things got better? But she didn’t see anything of this weird development, so maybe she shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions that they’re best friends now… what she WILL jump over however, is the cabin once she runs back to save Wilford with Parent and Abe.</p><p>Charlotte was quick, but careful while she was running through the woods, because she knew Abe wouldn’t like it if his head would be bonked against the branches. And yes, once she got close enough to the cabin, she didn’t even bother going around it.</p><p>“<b>Charlotte-?!</b>”</p><p>“Charlotte-!”</p><p>Charlotte hopped to the very edge of the roof, only to push herself up and over the cabin, landing on all feet. Perfect! 10/10!</p><p>Abe held onto his stomach for a moment.</p><p>“<b>Are you alright?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“You know that feeling when you’re driving down a hill really fast and your stomach leaps up to your throat?”</p><p>“<b>No.</b>”</p><p>“Good, cuz I experienced it for you.”</p><p>Once the three approached the field of tree stumps, Charlotte slowed down. Her tail went back underneath her stomach as she carefully sniffed for Wilford’s scent. <b> <em>It took us a while to get to the woods, but I hope it goes by quicker this time.</em> </b></p><p>Surprisingly enough, it <em> did </em> go by quicker. At one point while Charlotte was still sniffling around, Abe swore he saw a bright pink flower, resting against the side of a stump. He rubbed his eyes, and the flower was gone. “Huh.”</p><p>“<b>What is it?</b>” Dark asked.</p><p>“Nothing,” Abe said. “Thought I saw something.”</p><p>As Charlotte continued sniffling, she could hear Parent and Stupid Friend talk.</p><p>“I was thinking… what are we gonna do when we get to Wilford?”</p><p>“<b>We get to Wilford. I’m hoping to find someone else I’ve been looking for.</b>”</p><p>“Who is it?”</p><p>There was a small pause before Parent could respond with, “<b>It’s not important right now. What matters is finding Wilford.</b>”</p><p>“You better tell me afterwards. Don’t like getting answers.”</p><p>“<b>I know you don’t. We’ll do whatever we can if Wilford is in bigger trouble. Try not to think about it too hard…</b>”</p><p>Charlotte could feel Abe’s grip on her fur tightening for a second, and she heard him sigh. “I’ll try.”</p><p>There was another pause. Dark took a breath. “<b>I know I don’t sound like it, but… I’m worried, too. I just… don’t express it as loudly as you do. I thought you’d like to know that.</b>”</p><p>“… Thanks for letting me know.”</p><p>“<b>Of course.</b>”</p><p>“<em>NO! </em>” Charlotte’s right ear perked up, and she lifted her head to the very direction where she heard that shout.</p><p>The very direction Charlotte was looking at was a very clear path in between dark, thick trees.</p><p>“That’s where Wilford is?” Abe asked.</p><p>Charlotte took a deep breath and sighed through her nose. <b> <em>I hope so.</em> </b></p><p>Dark was sitting still, as Charlotte finally trekked on into the woods.</p><p>“<b>I remember this place,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Never liked it.</b>”</p><p>“Why?” Abe asked.</p><p>“<b>I’ve had… A part of me has had a bad experience in these woods one night. Never came down this far since.</b>”</p><p>“What do you mean ‘a part of’ you?” Abe asked.</p><p>Dark mumbled “<b>I knew you’d ask that,</b>” under his breath before he answered carefully, “<b>Let’s just say… I live as… an </b> <b> <em>amalgamation.</em> </b> <b> I’m a mix of two various things that shouldn’t belong together. This was the place that a part of me realized it, and found out what I was supposed to be.</b>”</p><p>“And that is…?”</p><p>Dark’s only answer was, “<b>A villain.</b>”</p><p>Abe blinked a few times. “What…?”</p><p>Charlotte’s head raised up again, both ears perked.</p><p>“<b>She’s got something,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Charlotte, are we close?</b>”</p><p>Abe looked over his shoulder to see Charlotte’s tail pointing out straight.</p><p>After a sneeze, Charlotte’s movements started out from an amble to a trot. Dark held onto her fur tightly. He glanced at Abe. <b> <em>She’s going to run in a second, I suggest you hold on tight.</em> </b></p><p>Abe did so, grabbing onto bits of fur with a worried face. <em> Okay… </em></p><p>Charlotte’s head went low, and her pace was quickened immediately. All she ever did was look straight ahead, knowing exactly where Wilford is. At this point, she didn’t care about anyone’s faces bonking against branches, this is a rescue mission, and nothing’s gonna stop Charlotte from getting Dark and Abe to Wilford.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Charlotte would make a great police dog.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0046"><h2>46. Charlotte Got So Excited, that she Made This Chapter Short</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was a wide open bit of land that led into a lake, and Charlotte didn’t hesitate to stop. Dark and Abe stumbled and struggled to stay on her back, only for Dark to get off, and Abe simply fell.</p><p>“Charlotte!” Abe called out. “Wait for us!”</p><p>Charlotte let out a bark. <b> <em>He’s here! There’s a huge hole in the lake!</em> </b></p><p>“<b>I </b> <b> <em>knew</em> </b> <b> it.</b>” Dark took off his blazer and tossed it to the dirt. “<b>Both of you, watch your step. Charlotte, you know what to do.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte nodded, and stuffed her nose in the water.</p><p>Abe had his hands cupped around his mouth. “WILFORD! WILFORD! WHERE ARE YOU?!”</p><p>Dark dragged his feet across the bottom of the lake, feeling for anything. “<b>Come on… don’t make me feel any </b> <b> <em>more</em> </b> <b> guilty…</b>”</p><p><b> <em>Gotta find Wilford, gotta find Wilford, got to. Gotta find Wilford, gotta find Wilford, got to. Gotta find Wilford, gotta find Wilford, got to. Gotta find Wilford, gotta find Wilford, got to-!</em> </b> Charlotte’s paw slipped at the edge of a pitch black hole at the center of the lake. Her eyes squinted, and saw violent flashes of red at the very bottom. There was a little flash of pink as well. She quickly turned to Dark and Abe with a loud bark. <b> <em>He’s down here! Parent! Stupid Friend! Wilford is down the hole!</em> </b></p><p>“Oh <em> shit, </em> please don’t tell me he drowned-!” Abe hurriedly stumbled over himself multiple times to get to Charlotte. They both looked over the edge of the hole, seeing the flashing colors at the bottom.</p><p>“<b>Both of you, stop!</b>” Dark reached a hand out before Abe and Charlotte could lean any closer above the hole. He caught up with them, standing dangerously close to the edge. The three stood still, all trying to get the water to stop wavering around. There were two violent, bright red swings that could be seen, and Charlotte’s legs bounced. <b> <em>He’s down there! I can’t take it anymore!</em> </b></p><p>Charlotte suddenly hopped up, and dove into the hole, with Abe gripping onto her by the tail. “Dark! Come on!”</p><p>He grabbed Dark’s hand, dragging him in the water without drawing in a breath. “<b>Mmmmmph-!</b>”</p><p>Abe led Dark by the hand to get him back on Charlotte, and he pulled out his pistol from his pocket, only to hold its handle by the mouth. It’d be amazing if he’d be able to pull the trigger with his tongue somehow… but that doesn’t matter. Wilford is in danger, and of anything that we’ve <em> definitely </em> not seen of how much Abe misses Wilford, he’s willing to do whatever he can to get his best friend back.</p><p>All three shut their eyes tight as they went through the bottom of the water, and Charlotte landed on all fours, on a very hard, cold floor. Abe wrapped his arms around her tail with his teeth gritting against his pistol’s handle. Dark landed next to Charlotte by kneeling with a hand to the floor. He stood up straight as Abe slid off of Charlotte’s tail. </p><p>The three saw in the distance, an ice wall, glowing very bright shades of red, as a red-dressed man was swinging some sort of stick against someone dressed in blue.</p><p>“<b>Mark…</b>” Dark’s eyes widened. “<b>The one in blue… is that-?!</b>”</p><p>Charlotte was growling, deeply. The man dressed in red stuck the gem end of his cane at the blue man’s throat. “Agh… Mark…”</p><p>Abe took an urgent step. “Wilford…”</p><p>Charlotte let out a loud bark before the red man could do anything, and she charged. <b> <em>Get away from him RIGHT NOW!</em> </b></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I honestly had no idea how to split these two specific chapters into two parts (this chapter and the next chapter), that I just made this one so short as a lead-in to the next one. Not one of my best ideas, but I tried!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0047"><h2>47. Best. Reconciliation. Ever.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b> <em>Get away from him RIGHT NOW!</em> </b>
</p><p>“<em>What the hell- </em> <b> <em>AGH!</em> </b>” Charlotte leapt over onto the red man to knock him off of Wilford, snarling with her teeth bared. The cane that the red man used as a weapon rolled across the floor, with its gem end bending off.</p><p>“<b>Wilford!</b>” Dark ran over and helped Wilford to his feet. “<b>Are you alright?</b>”</p><p>There were two bruises on Wilford’s face, one on his cheek, and one on the bridge of his nose. “Dark… I’m…”</p><p>He then saw Abe walking over to the red man, who was pinned down to the floor by Charlotte. He was aiming his pistol at him. “Alright, you son of a bitch! What the hell do you want with Wilford?!”</p><p>Dark held onto Wilford close, and he watched Abe with giant eyes.</p><p>“<em>I- I- You- You might be mistaken! </em> ” the red man exclaimed. “<em>Y- You must be looking for someone else-! </em>”</p><p>Charlotte snapped very close to the red man’s face, with bits of slobber flying out of her mouth.</p><p>“I’ve dealt with people like you before,” Abe said. “Who else would I be mistaking you with?”</p><p>The red man swallowed, keeping his hands up on each side of him. “<em>Uh…! Dave! You know! Dave? Dave Murderslaughter? </em>”</p><p>Abe snarled.</p><p>“<em>He’s a real person, I swear! </em> ” the red man exclaimed. “<em>Mr. Best Warden of the Year, Dave Murderslaughter of Happy Trails Penitentiary? </em>”</p><p>“I’ll tell him I’ll bring you in,” Abe said. “<em>After </em> you tell me what the <em> fuck </em> you’ve been doing to my partner.”</p><p>“<em>Nothing! </em>” the red man exclaimed, only to be responded by a click from the pistol.</p><p>“Dark, tell me what’s wrong with Wilford,” Abe said, not looking behind him. Wilford opened his mouth to answer, but Dark shushed him just by a rub on the shoulder. “<b>Two bruises in the face.</b>”</p><p>“<em>Those go away so fast, though! </em> ” the red man said, panicking a grin. “<em>He’ll be fine! </em>”</p><p>“Tell me who you are,” Abe ordered.</p><p>The Red Man crossed his arms. “<em>I don’t have to do a thing you say.</em>”</p><p>Charlotte’s growl was deep and drawn out. <b> <em>We know you hurt Wilford. Don’t make me wanna tear your face off as much as I already do.</em> </b></p><p>The Red Man frowned. “<em>I’d like to see you try-</em>”</p><p>Abe pulled the trigger as a warning shot, with the bullet flying right next to the Red Man’s face. There was a small scar on his cheek from a spark on the floor. “Tell me who you are, <em> now.</em>”</p><p>“<em>Don’t want to! </em>”</p><p>“<b>You have </b> <b> <em>no choice,</em> </b> <b> Mark,</b>” Dark said. His auras stretched out in a strange formation of hands. “<b>Or else… we’re gonna have to <em>make</em> you.</b>”</p><p>He felt Wilford shaking, and his eyes were screwed tight. Dark held him with his arm, silently nodding at Abe. He nodded back, stuffing his pistol in his pocket.</p><p>“Fine,” he said. “Don’t tell us who you are, and this big girl will have to rip your face off.”</p><p>“<em>She can do whatever she wants with me,</em>” the Red Man said. “<em>I’ll come back. I’ll </em> <b> <em>always</em> </b> <em> come back, no matter what.</em>”</p><p>Without turning around, Abe backed away slowly. “Whatever you say, dickweed.”</p><p>Before turning his back on the Red Man, Abe patted Charlotte’s side. <em> I don’t know entirely what he deserves but… give him what he deserves if </em> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <em> know. </em></p><p><b> <em>With pleasure.</em> </b> Charlotte huffed through her nose. Abe turned his back away from Charlotte as soon as she went ‘target locked’, straight for the kill.</p><p>Abe blocked out the noises and pleading for mercy from the Red Man as he faced Dark and Wilford. Dark seemed to be watching Charlotte do her thing, smiling faintly. Wilford was shaking, afraid to look at Abe in the eyes. Abe then noticed the strange dark blue sweater. If he had to be honest… Wilford always looked good in blue.</p><p>“Wilford…” Abe said quietly, reaching out a hand. “Are you okay?”</p><p>Wilford flinched every time Abe spoke, glancing at him from top to bottom a few times. He stared from over his shoulder, seeing Charlotte doing a good job. He saw the cracks in the ice wall, forming from violent shades of red to calm cyan and teal. There were also… more cracks than Wilford remembered. Water looked like it was pushing the ice to pressure the cracks.</p><p>“Wilford-” He stopped Abe from talking, tugging at Dark’s sleeve while saying almost weakly, “We need to get out of here… Dark, do you…”</p><p>“<b>I see it, Will,</b>” Dark said. “<b>As much as I’d hate to leave this </b> <b> <em>wonderful</em> </b> <b> show, I’m afraid I’ll have to end it early.</b>”</p><p>Dark brought two fingers together, and whistled for Charlotte. Her head perked, with noticeable blood dripping from her snout, and she looked forward to seeing cracks forming on the wall. She cowered at the view for a second, only to shake her head and run over to Dark, Wilford, and Abe, leaving the stiff and bloodied Red Man’s body behind.</p><p><b> <em>How do we get out of here??</em> </b> Charlotte licked her mouth, with Abe and Wilford blocking their eyes away. <b> <em>That thing is gonna break and it’ll drown us!</em> </b></p><p>“<b>Not if we run,</b>” Dark said. “<b>I can tell there’s a way out of here, we just have to </b> <b> <em>run. </em> </b> <b>Wilford is </b> <b> <em>very</em> </b> <b> dizzy at the moment, so, Abe, you’ll have to hold him steady on Charlotte’s back, alright?</b>”</p><p>Both Wilford and Abe blinked in surprise, understandably so.</p><p>“Why me?” Abe asked.</p><p>“<b>Because I said so,</b>” Dark said, carefully guiding Wilford over to Abe. “<b>I can run as fast as Charlotte can anyway.</b>”</p><p>A loud, splintering crack could be heard from the ice, with a few huge pieces being pushed out from the pressure of the water that began to flood.</p><p>“<b>Now let’s hurry,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>Charlotte lied down so Abe and Wilford could get on top of her, and she and Dark started to sprint for it… well, Dark didn’t really use his legs to sprint. He was sort of… gliding, with his hands stretched out on each side of him and his legs were off the ground. Either way, the four were going as fast as they could to outrun this flood.</p><p>Both Abe and Wilford obviously felt odd being this close to each other physically, but that didn’t matter. Again, this is a rescue mission. Forget feelings.</p><p>Charlotte panted harshly. <b> <em>What about the Actor Boy?</em> </b></p><p><b> <em>Forget about him,</em> </b> Dark brushed his hand against Charlotte’s side to keep his balance. <b> <em>We’ve got Wilford now. He’s hurt, but he’ll be alright. Besides, I’ve had the satisfaction of seeing you snuff out Mark.</em> </b></p><p>Charlotte barked in victory over the loud roar of water that was following from behind, <em> very </em>closely.</p><p>As the four saw the light from the top of the lake, Charlotte and Dark quickened their pace, as well as the rushing water did. Wilford and Abe shut their eyes tight, semi holding onto each other with Abe’s arms wrapped around Wilford. Both Dark and Charlotte stopped their movements, only to forcefully push themselves up to the very top of the water to the spot of land out of the lake.</p><p>Dark landed and leaned over to grab hold of the blazer he left behind. Charlotte toppled over herself and slid across the dirt, perfectly on her stomach. Because of Charlotte’s struggling landing, Wilford and Abe flew off of her back, but the both of them were still holding onto each other with everything intact. The water rushed up to the four of them, only for it to gently reel back by Wilford’s feet.</p><p>Dark and Charlotte got up slowly, with Dark brushing his soaked hair back, and Charlotte shaking dirt and water off of her (at a respectable distance).</p><p>“<b>Abe… Wilford…</b>” Dark looked over at them, holding each other like their lives depended on it. “<b>Are you two alright?</b>”</p><p>Abe was the first to open his eyes, looking around to see that everything was okay. He saw Wilford still keeping his eyes shut tight. He moved his hands up to Wilford’s shoulders to get him to sit up. “Hey, Wilford… you okay?”</p><p>There was a small whine, and he finally opened his eyes. The first thing Wilford saw was Abe. He could see Abe and his usual big, tired, sad, worried eyes. He brought a hand up, feeling for any kind of wound around Abe’s chest, remembering the familiar loud bang.</p><p>Wilford’s lip quivered, and Abe took his hand that was on his heart. “Wilford?”</p><p>“I shot you,” Wilford said, in a <em> very </em> quiet voice. “I <em> shot </em> you and… you’re right here…”</p><p>Abe looked up at Dark for a split second, having no idea to respond. “Yeah, and…?”</p><p>“You’re alive…” Wilford’s smile was very broken, wobbling around as if he were trying to keep his face steady. He shifted to sit on his knees while still looking at Abe in the eyes, with his own welling up with tears. “<em>You’re alive…</em>”</p><p>His head ducked down for a moment, with Abe looking at him cluelessly. After a pained whimper, Wilford then wrapped his arms around Abe, suddenly crying, hard.</p><p>Abe was completely taken aback by this. His eyes were very wide, and he looked back up at Dark, clueless as to what to do. Dark silently made a hugging gesture, wrapping his arms around each other.</p><p>As Wilford sobbed, Abe eventually put one hand on Wilford’s back, and another in his hair. He embraced the gesture, both literally and figuratively, by holding onto Wilford as tightly as he was before, feeling a lump in his throat that he tried to swallow down.</p><p>“Hey… it’s okay. You’re okay, bud, you’re okay.”</p><p>Through a few sobs and hiccups for air, Wilford tried to replicate his noises into words. “I’m s- so <em>sorry-</em> I didn’t- remember, and- and-”</p><p>Abe rubbed his back gently, which made Wilford stop himself only to continue crying.</p><p>“It’s okay, buddy, shhhshshshshshh…” Abe’s voice was uncharacteristically calming. He rested his chin on top of Wilford’s head. “I don’t care about that. I’m just… <em> so </em> goddamn happy you’re safe.”</p><p>It’s true. He was. He really really <em> really </em> was.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0048"><h2>48. Storytime? Yes.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They’d eventually made it back to Abe’s apartment, and Will had been surprised and delighted to find it so clean. “You picked up!”</p><p>“Yeah, I… got tired of you harping on me.” Abe’s response was paired with a weak, sheepish smile.</p><p>Conversations between the two were a bit clipped after their reunion. Things were still tender between them, and while they were good… there was still so much that needed to be said. Things neither wanted to touch on right now.</p><p>Wilford had smiled back, just as faintly.</p><p>The madman was now taking a much needed nap in his room, exhausted from the events that had happened in such a short time. If he noticed the lingering scent of cigarettes and… other recreational products, he didn’t say anything about it. For now, all he wanted to do was curl up on his bed and sleep, preferably for several hours.</p><p>Charlotte had managed to squeeze her way into the room, and rested her head against the side of his bed. Wilford quietly snuggled up against her. It was nice, and quiet. He only needed a few minutes before he drifted off.</p><p>“<b>How is he?</b>” Dark asked, after Abe had checked up on their sleeping friend.</p><p>The detective quietly shut Will’s door. </p><p>“He’s asleep. No nightmares yet… I think he’ll be okay.” Abe was trying very hard to sound optimistic. Dark could hear the strain in his voice.</p><p>There was a moment where he seemed to debate to himself, and then turned to go sit down on the couch. “<b>I believe… I believe it may be time to catch you up on… certain things. Come. Sit.</b>”</p><p>The detective sat down stiffly on the cushions, causing a creaking noise.</p><p>“<b>… We are all extremely old,</b>” Dark began.</p><p>“Yeah, I figured that,” Abe said dryly. Dark held up a hand.</p><p>“<b>I don’t think you remember just </b> <b> <em>how </em> </b> <b>old, Abe. But that’s not your fault.</b>” He cleared his throat, leaning back in a more comfortable position. “<b>You’re actually the oldest out of all of us. I’d reckon about… one hundred and twenty-three years old. Maybe one hundred and twenty-four.</b>”</p><p>The detective frowned. “So you’re saying… you’re saying I was born in-” he quietly did the math in his head, his frown deepening. “1889?” </p><p>“<b>Well, think about it. Your first memories were chasing down Wilford… and the night that you finally caught him and decided you were tired of holding grudges, started a life with him. You </b> <b> <em>both </em> </b> <b>were already adults by then, in the seventies, and you knew you’d already been stuck in a loop, chasing him for… you said about thirty years, yes?</b>” </p><p>A slow, quiet nod. The frown wasn’t going away, though.</p><p>“<b>But what if I told you I knew the reason </b> <b> <em>why </em> </b> <b>you were chasing him? Why do both of you have faulty memories, but Wilford’s is notably worse?</b>”</p><p>“Then…” Abe sighed, sinking down into the cushions. “Then I’d have to believe you, wouldn’t I?” </p><p>Dark could see the other man’s frustration bubbling to the surface. He forced a little smile before continuing on. “<b>Well… I do. Know why, that is. But it’s a long story, and I’m not entirely sure you will want to hear the entirety of it.</b>” He glanced at Abe. “<b>It’s alright if you want me to stop at any point. Some of this might be… difficult to hear, especially coming from me.</b>”</p><p>A long, beleaguered sigh. Abe closed his eyes. “I’m just… tired of not knowing what’s happening. Not knowing why Wilford’s hearing voices, and acting stranger than he usually does.” He swallowed. “I want to know who I am, Dark.”</p><p>He was afraid that might be the case.</p><p>Dark gathered his thoughts, and quietly began. “<b>Many, many years ago, that man we saw in the forest held a party for his friends. His name was Mark, and at the time, he was a washed-out actor who had long gotten down from the high from his fame, and his brutally public divorce. He was angry, and hurt, and he had drawn away from the rest of the world.</b>”</p><p>A shift on the couch. “<b>His friends had been worried. They had feared the worst. Imagine their delight when he reached out to them all, assuring them that he was fine, that all was forgiven- and to prove it, he was going to host a poker party, calling it a celebration. Not only one of his friends - the mayor - was invited, but the mayor</b><b></b><b>’s friend - a district attorney - was invited, and Mark barely knew the district attorney at all. What a </b> <b> <em>generous </em> </b> <b>friend Mark was.</b>”</p><p>Abe could hear the dripping bitterness in his tone. This was not going to be a happy story, he was very sure.</p><p>“<b>Oh, trust me,</b>” Dark said. “<b>It doesn’t get any happier after this point.</b>”</p><p>They waited for a moment before Dark continued. “<b>It was so wonderful, at first. We were all together again, for the first time in years. There was drinking, laughter… and it should have only been that. Fun between a group of friends.</b>”</p><p>“‘We’?”</p><p>“<b>You…</b>” Dark started, pointing at Abe in the chest. He pointed to himself. “<b>A part of </b> <b> <em>me…</em></b>” He pointed down the hall to Wilford’s room. “<b>And Will. Well… back before he’d…</b>” A weak smile, with a finger circling around the side of his head. “<b>We knew him as William then.</b>”</p><p>“I think I remember you calling him that when we met,” Abe said.</p><p>A nod. “<b>It’s… difficult to remember, sometimes. Or forget. Either one.</b>”</p><p>“You were talking about the party,” Abe recalled. “You kinda sounded like you were hyping it up to a big disaster event… I think I remember <em> some </em> of it, but to be honest, I’m kind of afraid to say anything if I get it wrong.”</p><p>“<b>Well then, what is it that you </b> <b> <em>do </em> </b> <b>remember?</b>” Dark asked, genuinely sounding curious.</p><p>Abe leaned back, looking up at the ceiling. “Ah… getting drunk… seeing a red guy’s body…”</p><p>“<b>That ‘red guy’ was Mark,</b>” Dark said, and Abe paused. “<b>You worked for him.</b>”</p><p>“<em> Oh… </em>”</p><p>A little smirk. “<b>You’ll be disappointed to know that he’ll be back… he always comes back.</b>”</p><p>The detective frowned. </p><p>“<b>But no matter. The party… that is the root to all of our problems, Abe.</b>”</p><p>“How?”</p><p>Their conversation wasn’t <em> polite </em>, per say, but there was a sort of understanding between the two of them.</p><p>“<b>… Needless to say, you </b> <b> <em>were</em> </b> <b> a bit rude the entire time,</b>” Dark said at one point.</p><p>“Hey-!” Abe stopped himself, lowering his volume. “It’s true, but you don’t have to <em> say </em> it…”</p><p>A chuckle. “<b>My apologies.</b>”</p><p>“So what happened at this party?”</p><p>Dark waved his hand. “<b>Oh. You know. William got drunk and Mark talked him into playing Russian Roulette.</b>”</p><p>“<em> ... What? </em>”</p><p>“<b>Russian Roulette?</b>” Dark repeated.</p><p>“<em>I know what Russian Roulette is!!! </em>”</p><p>Dark pressed a finger on his lips, shushing Abe. He stared at Wilford’s door, zipping his mouth shut. “<em> I know what Russian Roulette is…! </em>I meant it like, ‘What a great idea it was to talk Wilford into a game of Russian Roulette!’”</p><p>“<b>Ah. Well, I suppose it was for Mark. Will shot him in the head.</b>”</p><p>“How do you <em> know </em> all this stuff? I mean… part of you wasn’t there when it happened, right?”</p><p>Dark nodded. “<b>Right. </b> <b>A<em>nother</em></b> <b> part of me would observe everything in the house at once.</b>”</p><p>“So… you’re omniscient.”</p><p>“<b>Guess so.</b>” He really didn’t want to get into the nitty-gritty, not just yet. There was already so much he had to explain. “<b>But anyways- Mark’s body was found the next morning, by the attorney. </b> <b> <em>You </em> </b> <b>freaked out and thought they did it.</b>”</p><p>Abe half-shrugged. “Of course I did, they were the first person I saw next to him.” He paused. “Here comes <em> my </em> memory.”</p><p>“<b>See? You do know what happened. Deep down. It takes time. Anyway…</b>”</p><p>Dark continued telling this story, and Abe paid as much attention as possible. Something about… Abe making the district attorney his new partner, an outline of Mark’s body including his dick, a wine cellar with a bottle that the butler freaked out about, William showing up out of nowhere during the investigation to ‘borrow’ the attorney. Him avoiding the mayor like Abe avoids most of his feelings… something about a lady that William really loved arriving at the house…</p><p>Dark took a deep breath, and sighed. “<b>This is when it gets more confusing.</b>”</p><p>“Like it isn’t already.”</p><p>“<b>Hence the ‘more’.</b>”</p><p>“Alright then…” Abe shifted to have one leg dangling off the edge of the couch. “This bedtime story is longer than I thought. Go ahead.”</p><p>“<b>Are you tired? I can stop.</b>”</p><p>“<em> No. </em>” Earnest, not forceful.</p><p>“<b>Well… eventually, you and William began to bash heads. He scared you, and you pulled out a gun on him. The house was getting unnerved, and it only got worse with Celine… the love of Will’s life, and… the woman who had once been married to Mark.</b>” He shifted uncomfortably. “<b>She was… skilled in the occult. Found comfort in it. She took the attorney aside and tried to figure out just what was going on through a seance.</b>”</p><p>A sigh. “<b>They both failed… it was the last I ever saw either of them in the living world.</b>”</p><p>“What’s that mean?” Abe asked. “Did they die in the seance, or…?”</p><p>“<b>Celine and her brother did, yes,</b>” Dark said. “<b>The mayor, I should say.</b>”</p><p>“And where do you come into all of this?”</p><p>A very weary smile. “<b>After they died, William lost it. He thought </b> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <b> were the culprit, that you had taken his friends away. Pulled a gun on you. You confronted him and accused him of causing all of it… Mark’s death, the twins’ disappearances, Celine’s leaving Mark.</b>”</p><p>Twins…?</p><p>“<b>The attorney had followed both of you, tried to stop you from fighting. Both of you took it too far and William shot you.</b>” His voice was flat now. “<b>The attorney then tried to take the gun out of Will’s hands, but Will accidentally pulled the trigger, and they… they fell over a banister, onto the floor below.</b>”</p><p>“<em>Jesus,</em>” Abe mumbled, breathless.</p><p>“<b>I know,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>“… So what happened to them?” He asked, despite knowing he wouldn’t like the answer.</p><p>“<b>They… died.</b>”</p><p>“Oh…”</p><p>Dark looked extremely uncomfortable. “<b>And… I’m sure you know what happened next.</b>”</p><p>“I don’t,” Abe said. Dark opened his mouth to try to say something, but he only took a deep breath. “<b>Here…</b>”</p><p>Dark’s right hand began glowing a deep red, and his left hand was a bright blue. “<b>These are their souls… got that?</b>”</p><p>Abe nodded.</p><p>Dark cleared his throat, and then smashed his hands together awkwardly, creating a strange purplish-black mixture. A little white light, faint, was hovering near it. <b> <em>They needed a body.</em> </b></p><p>Dark’s hands tore apart from each other, with the purple and black mix forming like a person. The red and blue glow from Dark’s hands flew around the tiny person, and the white light was ripped out.</p><p><em> … Oh… </em> </p><p>Grimacing uncomfortably, Dark clapped his hands together, with the person fading away like a tiny puff of smoke from in between his fingers. Dark’s hands rested on his lap, leaving Abe silently appalled.</p><p>“They both…” Dark nodded. “That attorney…” Dark nodded again. “You…” Dark nodded again.</p><p>“They just kicked them outta their own body?” Abe asked, as well as gesturing it with his thumb.</p><p>“<b>It’s a lot to think about, I know,</b>” Dark said.</p><p>“… <em> Why? </em>”</p><p>“<b>Hm?</b>”</p><p>“Why did they think that was a good idea??” Abe asked.</p><p>He winced before his expression went blank. “<b>They were under the influence of malicious forces… Damien’s mind broke.</b>”</p><p>“I thought it was Will whose mind broke,” Abe said.</p><p>“<b>In a different sense,</b>” Dark corrected. “<b>They both broke in different ways. Will’s mind broke in a literal sense.</b>”</p><p>Abe leaned back. “Okay… what about that attorney? Why’d they kick them out?”</p><p>“<b>… They don’t speak to me anymore. Not about that subject, at least.</b>” Dark looked down for a moment. “<b>The twins- </b> <b> <em>I</em> </b> <b> figured- the attorney was… too innocent. They were naive, and just… waltzed around, doing what other people told them to. I didn’t want them to lose any more control, so…</b>”</p><p>“Wouldn’t kicking them out of their own body mean no control at all anyway?” Abe asked. “Do you even know where they are?”</p><p>“<b>At the mansion,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Their soul, anyway, in a mirror.</b>”</p><p>“And you never went back?!” Abe’s voice raised, and he peeked back at Wilford’s door.</p><p>“<b>Would </b> <b> <em>you? </em> </b> ” Dark kept his voice steady. “<b>I never go back there at all, </b> <b> <em>just</em> </b> <b> because of how uncomfortable it makes me. I can’t bear the thought of going back to that house, let alone if the attorney would still be there and not forgive me… which I’m fine with.</b>”</p><p>“Why?” Abe asked. “Because you said you’re a <em> villain? </em>”</p><p>“<b><em>Exactly.</em></b>” Dark grit his teeth. “<b>Mark told me so.</b>”</p><p>“… That can’t be what you want.”</p><p>Dark forced a smile. “<b>Funny, you say that you’ve suspected me to be an awful person when you first met me.</b>”</p><p>“I’m starting to think you expected that already.” He scowled. “But Mark’s a different sense of awful.”</p><p>“<b>How would </b> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <b> know that?</b>” Dark asked. “<b>You </b> <b> <em>worked</em> </b> <b> for him. You’ve never even seen the </b> <b> <em>worst</em> </b> <b> of what he could do.</b>”</p><p>Abe crossed his arms, and fixed his gaze on the television set across the room. The further from Dark the better. “I may not remember everything, or… even know all that much, but I remember the night I caught up with Wilford. I remember dancing with him. I remember all the bullshit he’s put me through over the years.”</p><p>He looked down. “I’ve had so many nightmares about <em> that </em>night, even when I didn’t know why… maybe I don’t remember the others. Or I didn’t have all the facts when I was hired, but… I remember that I cared about them- about my partner…”</p><p>He faltered for a moment. “And anyone that’s just willing to- to throw people away like that, to hurt them because they were <em> in the way </em>… just because they hurt him first…”</p><p>Abe shook his head. “I don’t remember much. But I know I care about Will, and that you’d never hurt him. Mark… that’s <em> all </em>he wants.”  </p><p>“<b>He’s just that big of a megalomaniac that he doesn’t see that he’s hurting others,</b>” Dark said, suddenly. “<b>I saw where you were going with that.</b>”</p><p>“Yeah…”</p><p>They sat in awkward silence for a moment, before Dark huffed. “<b>So- now you know why I can’t tell Wilford.</b>”</p><p>“I know why you don’t tell us anything in general,” Abe muttered. “I got a quick question… have you seen Mark? Like, what did he say to you, other than claiming you to be a ‘villain’?”</p><p>Dark huffed again. “<b>That he’d apologize.</b>”</p><p>“And?” Abe raised an eyebrow, and Dark shrugged.</p><p>“<b>He never did so.</b>”</p><p>“Well <em> duh. </em>” Abe sighed, and shifted again. “You know what Wilford told me on the same night I caught him?”</p><p>“<b>What.</b>”</p><p>“‘Nothing heals like a good apology.’”</p><p>Dark snorted. Loudly. “<b>That’s </b> <b> <em>so </em> </b> <b>like him.</b>”</p><p>Abe was smiling a bit. “Yeah, he didn’t give a shit of what was going on at <em> all </em> that night.”</p><p>“<b>I’ll bet.</b>”</p><p>“He’s always been like that, yeah?”</p><p>“<b>Yes, he was.</b>”</p><p>There was a loud thump that came from Wilford’s room. Dark and Abe shared a look. Abe called, “Wilford??”</p><p>A groan, and then a loud whine from Charlotte.</p>
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<a name="section0049"><h2>49. Naptime? Finally!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilford’s dream started off very simple. He was in the forest again, walking alongside a giant dog. He tried to look up at the dog, but it was so big, that all he could see was its paws.</p><p>They walked for what felt like forever, until they came across a lake covered in ice. Wilford looked down to see a pair of ice skates on his feet, and smiled. He looked up to see the dog, seeing if it would follow him into the frozen lake. All it did was stand still, definitely not creepily at all. Wilford took this as confirmation that the dog would stay put and watch him have fun.</p><p>He stepped onto the lake, and while he heard quiet creaking, there were no cracks. With a smile, he began to glide over the ice.</p><p>For a while, things were alright- little pink lights floating under the ice, all different, but somehow still the same. He was separate from them all, like he was in his own little soap bubble.</p><p>Then, the soap bubble popped.</p><p>The ice cracked loudly, and he flinched, looking down. He had fallen in the water, but he felt nothing- it was like he was being dragged under, and all he could hear was loud, concerned barking. Water filled his mouth, his nose. He gasped and spluttered, trying to climb out, but that only made him sink faster.</p><p>He saw nothing.</p><p>He crossed his arms, slowly.</p><p>“<em>What does it take to have a decent dream now and then?! </em>” He asked silently, with bubbles of air wobbling out from his mouth. He looked around- he was cold, but he saw no water. Wilford frowned. “What…?”</p><p><em> What, </em> <em> what, </em> <em> what… </em></p><p>There was a small light at the bottom of the floor, and he heard faint crying. It got louder when Wilford got closer and closer to the floor, only to land harshly on his back. He opened his mouth and gasped largely for air, almost ending up in a coughing fit.</p><p>Wilford looked up to see that the top of the lake was replaced by a regular white ceiling. He was lying in a hallway of sorts, and it was late at night. The crying from before was much more clearer, and Wilford struggled to get up to his feet.</p><p>He turned to the direction of where this crying was coming from, only to see a body on the floor, with a dried puddle of blood underneath. There was a big table with a dead plant on top of it, already looking long-gone to be watered. Wilford looked over the corner of the wall to see a man in yellow, kneeling on a cushioned bench with a long black cane in his hands.</p><p>“Uh…” He stared at the other guy for a while, feeling unable to look away. “Hello.”</p><p>The man didn’t move. His only response after a few sniffles was, “I figured I wasn’t alone.”</p><p>“Are you alright?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“… I haven’t been alright for a long time,” he murmured. Wilford finally moved, carefully leaning against the wall next to the man on the bench.</p><p>“Is there anything I can do to help?” he asked. The man forced a laugh that sounded like a sob.</p><p>“Not unless you can hide me from the police,” he croaked. “Or I’ll just sit here until I’m dead.”</p><p>“Hey, it can’t be that bad,” Wilford said. The other let out a loud sob.</p><p>“I can assure you, it really is.” His grip on the cane tightened. “You have no idea what happened here. It’s my fault.”</p><p>“What happened…?” </p><p>The other man shuddered. “They’re all dead,” he said, hollowly. “They’re gone- my friends, my family, <em> every</em>one is gone.”</p><p>Wilford uncomfortably watched the man bury his face in his hands. He looked back at the body from across the room. They… look pretty fine to Wilford.</p><p>“So?”</p><p>The other man gave Wilford a very odd look. And he was used to looks by now. This one was entirely new. “How do you know they’re dead?”</p><p>“I… I don’t- they were <em> shot- </em> I checked their pulse, and-”</p><p>“And they could be fine!” Comforting people when it came to death had never really been Wilford’s strong suit.</p><p>There was such a broken look in the other man’s eyes. His moustache twitched for a moment, brown and bushy. “It’s not fine. It’ll never be fine, child. They’re gone, and they always will be.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sure they’ll be okay,” Wilford tried to put a hand on the man’s shoulder. His only response was a scowl. “They’ll get right back up in no time-”</p><p>A hand gripped at Wilford’s chest, and he was suddenly pinned down to the floor. The cane was pressed up against his chest, with the man’s face beet red, gritting his teeth together. “Is this some kind of <em> joke?? </em> I just killed my <em> friends, </em> and you <em> laugh?! </em>”</p><p>Wilford coughed a bit. “I never laughed! But if it’s passed, then what’s the use of worrying? Why wallow?”</p><p>“MY FRIENDS ARE <em> DEAD, </em> YOU SCUMBAG!”</p><p>“WHY ARE WE SHOUTING, THEN?!?” The cane’s pressure against Wilford’s chest got tighter.</p><p>“HOW THE HELL DID YOU EVEN GET <em> IN </em> HERE??” the man asked, loudly.</p><p><em> I DON’T KNOW, WHERE IS ‘HERE’??? </em> Wilford had to turn his face away, struggling to breathe.</p><p>“Are you some kind of test?! Some cruel image <em> he </em>came up with?”</p><p>“Hey, I’m not so <em> crazy </em> about this either-” Wilford tried to interject. But he was also still trying to catch some air. It didn’t help that the man leaned over.</p><p>“Are you sure about that??” he asked. “Because you damn well look it.”</p><p>Instinctively, Wilford suddenly grabbed hold of the cane, looking at the grieving man in the eyes. “What’d you just call me?”</p><p>“You’re <em> crazy! </em>”</p><p>“No, I’m not-”</p><p>“You <em> are! </em>”</p><p>“I am <em> NOT! </em>”</p><p>The man blinked, and Wilford shoved him off with the cane with force. The man struggled to stand up, stumbling against the wall. Wilford shoved the long end of the cane close to his chest.</p><p>“You wanna run that by me again??” he asked. The other man glared at him, but he didn’t say a word. Wilford’s face softened.</p><p>“Look, mister- I’ve had a hell of a day. I’m sure you have, too. Can we maybe <em> not </em>beat each other up?” he asked dryly.</p><p>“Why do you care?”</p><p>“Um… because I like my face?” Wilford vaguely gestured at his face. “And I’m sure you do too, mister glorious moustache?”</p><p>The man’s struggling face changed, and Wilford noticed him looking over his shoulder. The man frowned, and lightly pushed Wilford off of him with the cane somehow in his hand. “Sorry about that. I am… not doing very well.”</p><p>Wilford rubbed his chest. “I can tell. Sorry for stressing you out.”</p><p>The other man just grunted, sitting back down at the bench. Wilford sat, too, his feet dangling a few centimetres. “So… strange place here, huh?”</p><p>“Yeah…”</p><p>Wilford cleared his throat, and the other man shifted. </p><p>“I’m Wilford,” he announced suddenly, with all the confidence of a five-year old on a playground. The man beside him smirked lightly.</p><p>“William J. Barnum.” He put out a hand for Wilford to shake. “Nice to finally see a friendly face around here.”</p><p>“You just called me crazy, though,” Wilford said. William shrugged.</p><p>“I’m too quick to judge a character, I suppose,” he mumbled.</p><p>“Eh. That’s alright.” Wilford smiled. “I understand that. When you say ‘friendly face’, is that because everyone here is an asshole, or because I’m the only other person here?”</p><p>A snort. “Likely both.”</p><p>Wilford tried to laugh at that. “Ha, that’s fair.”</p><p>They both sat in silence for a moment, with Wilford noticing William staring at the body, frowning deeply.</p><p>“I shouldn’t have come,” William said, out of nowhere. “I shouldn’t have accepted that stupid invitation. I should have just stayed at home with Celine.”</p><p>Wilford’s ear twitched at that name for some reason. He tried to look at William in the eye, but he was sadly slouching forward like before. “Who’s Celine?”</p><p>William’s grip clenched around the cane slightly, and he took a deep breath. “My love.”</p><p>“She sounds lovely. Do you know where she is now?”</p><p>“I… no… I don’t know…” William shuddered so badly that Wilford thought he would fall off the bench. “I don’t know, I don’t know…” His head was in his hands, and he let out frightened little squeaks. “I couldn’t find her after- after the detective-”</p><p>He was spiraling. Hesitantly, Wilford tried to put a hand on William’s shoulder. “I’m sorry- I shouldn’t have asked that-”</p><p>William gripped at his hair. “She was just here, and now she’s- she and Damien, they’re- they-”</p><p>He sucked in a breath, and Wilford grit his teeth. As soon as he touched William by the shoulder, his hand suddenly glitched into static, making him pull his hand back in surprise. “I’m sorry! I-”</p><p>William stared at him then, eyes wide. “It’s <em> you-! </em>”</p><p>“It’s me <em> what?! </em>”</p><p>He quickly clasped Wilford’s shoulders. His grip was a bit too strong, and his lip quivered a little. Both of his hands were turning to static, but he didn’t seem affected by it.</p><p>“What is it?!” Wilford asked. “What’s wrong??”</p><p>“You- it’s hard to explain, just- me, think of me as… as your conscience, yes?”</p><p>“My <em> what? </em>”</p><p>“You haven’t heard from me in a while- and… something happened, something bad.”</p><p>“William, I don’t underst-” More static, and Wilford screamed. William only winced, but he seemed to feel it, too.</p><p>“You don’t have to understand. I don’t fully, either.”</p><p>It was starting to get extremely painful now. </p><p>Was this what dying felt like? Wilford has died multiple times, but… it never felt like this before.</p><p>Another spark. Wilford clutched his head.</p><p>“THE <em> HELL </em> IS THIS?!” William stared at his and Wilford’s elbows, both merging together.</p><p>“I DON’T KNOW!”</p><p>This was officially the weirdest thing that ever happened to Wilford- and he’d spent several years tripped out on acid. He’s seen some weird stuff. “I THOUGHT YOU KNEW- AUGH, WHAT THE <em> FUCK?!? </em>”</p><p>“I <em> NEVER </em> KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON!!!”</p><p>“YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE SMART ONE, CONSCIENCE!”</p><p>They both winced. William quickly pulled his hands back, with tiny bits of static floating and following them every time they moved.</p><p>“Alright, alright… bully- I… have <em> no </em> clue what’s happening…”</p><p>Wilford held onto his hand, flexing it. “You know how <em> I </em> feel <em> all </em> the time.”</p><p>“Yes…”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“I don’t… I don’t know, Wilford.” He sounded genuinely confused, shuddering. “This is… bad.”</p><p>“What do you mean?” Wilford asked. “The whole situation <em> you’re </em> in, or whenever we touch, we turn all glitchy and morphy?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” William said. “Both…?”</p><p>“So, you don’t know what’s going on… <em> I </em>don’t know what’s going on… this is nuts, man.”</p><p>William leaned back, looking up. “Tell me about it. You haven’t seen what I’ve seen, friend.”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “I mean… we’ve both probably seen some really messed up stuff.”</p><p>“<em>Probably?? </em>” William huffed. Wilford shrugged. This was so fucking weird.</p><p>“What are we going to do?” Wilford looked over, almost afraid to touch William again. “This dream feels like it’s going nowhere…”</p><p>William blinked, glancing at Wilford. “What <em> dream? </em>”</p><p>“What, you saying this whole thing is real?” Wilford asked.</p><p>“Are <em> you </em> saying this whole thing is a dream??” William asked, holding onto the cane with one hand.</p><p>Wilford nodded, staring at the cane. “Yeah, I’m taking a nap with a giant dog right now. I <em> know </em>this is a dream… this is real for you?”</p><p>“I’ve been here for a long, long time,” William muttered quietly, wringing the cane with his hands. “Years, maybe…” He glanced up at Wilford. “If you’re dreaming, then… then perhaps we need to find a way to wake you up.”</p><p>“Yeah- should we-” Wilford held out a hand, questioningly.</p><p>Hesitation. William glanced down at the cane again, and over at the body still on the floor.</p><p><em> If this is how I go out, then this is how I go out. </em> William took Wilford’s hand, with a long sting of static coursing through. It was the worst out of the shocks, and frighteningly, this time they couldn’t separate. William clutched his head- Wilford was feeling extremely nauseous.</p><p>“If I- throw up on you, don’t- don’t be mad at me-” And then he doubled over and hurled, thankfully missing William.</p><p>William breathed hard through his nose before pulling Wilford against him, and they screamed, ending up on the floor. There was a loud bump, and faintly, Wilford thought he could hear barking.</p><p>There was a scary moment where everything went blank, and there was only pain. Then, with a groan, Will opened their eyes.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0050"><h2>50. Wakey-Wakey, Sleepy Boy(s)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Underlined dialogue/thoughts is William</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Wilford??” Abe knocked loudly on the door, but all he heard was a groan and whimpering from Charlotte. “Wilford, <em> are you okay?!? </em>”</p><p>No answer this time. He tried to open the door, and huffed in concerned frustration when he couldn’t.</p><p>“<b>Let me try.</b>” Dark nudged him a little bit, and tried the door as well, the doorknob creaking a little bit. Nothing. “<b>Does he usually lock himself in?</b>”</p><p>“No- he usually doesn’t even sleep with the door <em> closed. </em>”</p><p>“<b>Well, come on,</b>” Dark said. “<b>Help me budge this thing.</b>”</p><p>They both pushed against the door, only to fall forward and land on top of each other when it opened from the inside.</p><p>“Owwwww…”</p><p>“<b>Wilford,</b>” Dark muttered, getting up with the help from Abe. “<b>Are you alright?</b>”</p><p>Wilford rubbed his head with both his hands, groaning. “Oh… <span class="u"> <em> bully.</em></span>”</p><p>Dark froze. Abe walked straight over.</p><p>“You okay, bud?” he asked, reaching out a hand. Wilford stared up at him for a long moment.</p><p><span class="u"> <em>Why- how- I </em> <b> <em> <strong>shot-</strong> </em> </b> </span> Will started to choke, and Abe held onto his shoulder.</p><p>“What’s wrong? You sick? You need anything?”</p><p>Wilford pulled his shoulder away, bottom lip quivering. “I- I- uhm…”</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> What the fuck?!? </em> </span>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t know? Say something!!! </em>
</p><p>“<span class="u">Can… you wa </span>ke Charlotte up?”</p><p>
  <em> Nailed it- </em>
</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> WHO’S CHARLOTTE?!? </em> </span>
</p><p>
  <em> Shh! </em>
</p><p>“<b>Will…</b>” Dark’s voice was quiet. “<b>Are you… feeling any different?</b>”</p><p>“I feel like shit.” He groaned a little, hiding his face in the crook of his elbow. There were little woofs and whimpers as Abe woke Charlotte up, and then a big nose sniffing Wilford’s hair. He flinched back to see her, only to stumble on top of his bed. “<span class="u">Wha… I…</span> hi, Charlotte, I…”</p><p>Charlotte rested her head on the edge of the bed, glancing up at him with big, brown eyes. He trembled for a moment, intimidated by her size, before hesitantly reaching out and placing a hand on her nose.</p><p>A little sigh and a tail wag, and she closed her eyes, somehow knowing he was overwhelmed.</p><p>“<span class="u">Good… good dog…</span> such a sweet girl.”</p><p>Safe to say, Dark and Abe were extremely concerned.</p><p>
  <b> <em>He feels off.</em></b>
</p><p>Charlotte yawned and shuffled forward a little bit, nuzzling Wilford’s side. He had frozen again, a very strange look on his face before relaxing, leaning against her.</p><p><b> <em>What’s wrong?</em> </b> She blinked up at him slowly. <b> <em> Did you have a bad dream?</em></b></p><p>“<span class="u">Uh…</span>” He looked over at Dark’s face, seeing him standing completely still. “I did…”</p><p><b> <em>This is all my fault... I shouldn’t have left you all alone with the Acting Boy.</em> </b> Her ears drooped. <b> <em>I’m so sorry. I should have protected you... I’m such a bad dog.</em></b></p><p><em>No… </em><em>No.</em> Wilford awkwardly curled against her, placing another hand up on her muzzle. <em>You’re a good dog, the best girl.</em></p><p>Abe and Dark shared a look.</p><p>“<b>Will… are you sure you’re alright? You’re acting…</b>”</p><p>“… Strange,” Abe finished.</p><p>Wilford looked up at Dark for the first time, squinting a little bit. “… Heyyyy… w<span class="u"> hen did you get here, Damien?</span>”</p><p>You could hear a pin drop in the room. Dark’s eyes were wide. He slowly held up his finger. “<b>I… please excuse me for a moment.</b>”</p><p>He rushed out of the room, and everyone else thought they could hear muffled screaming out in the hallway.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> What- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> How- </em>
</p><p>
  <em> How does he remember you?!? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I don’t know!!! </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>More vague screaming. Wilford frowned a little bit more. “Okay…”</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> I can’t believe Damien’s still alive- after all this time! He’s alright!</em></span>
</p><p>
  <em> Who’s ‘Damien’, again…?</em>
</p><p>He rocked happily on his heels. <span class="u"> <em> My best friend. I thought he was lost…</em></span></p><p>
  <em> Oh… well, good for you, then.</em>
</p><p>“Wilford, are you…” Abe was very hesitant, for some reason. “What’s up?”</p><p>Wilford stared up at him, blankly. He looked back down at Charlotte again. Charlotte seemed to shrug.</p><p>“<span class="u">I’m…</span>” One of Wilford’s hands was clenching into a fist, shaking a bit. He signed steadily. “…fine. We’re fine.”</p><p>Abe’s brow quirked. <em> ‘We’…?</em></p><p>Wilford bit his tongue. “I meant it like… us, collectively, we’re fine! <em> You’re </em> fine, <em> Dark’s </em> fine…”</p><p>Another muffled scream from outside of the room. “<b>WHY </b><b><em>NOW?! </em></b>”</p><p>Wilford gritted his teeth together for a moment. “…-ish. Charlotte is as good as ever…”</p><p>Charlotte almost had this squirmish look on her face. Clearly, Charlotte knew something was up.</p><p>“And <em> I’m </em> fine.” Wilford smiled. “<span class="u">Truly.</span>”</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> Or, I suppose we will be. Perhaps. </em> </span>
</p><p>
  <em> You’re worrying too much! </em>
</p><p>Abe still had a funny look on his face. Dark was freaking out somewhere. And Charlotte just looked confused.</p><p>Wilford had his arms to his sides, and was grinning. He definitely wasn’t having an identity crisis in this very moment. Not at all.</p><p>“Well, what are you standing there for?” he asked. He grabbed onto Abe’s shoulders to turn him to the door. “I’m alright, duck! No need to worry over me right now.”</p><p>Abe held onto the doorframe. “No, you’re not doing this, too- You gotta tell me what’s up, Wilford.”</p><p>“<span class="u">It’s nothing.</span>” Wilford’s voice was gruff. “<span class="u">Go on and solve a case or… something.</span>”</p><p>Abe looked over his shoulder to try to face Wilford. There was something that he immediately noticed with his mustache.</p><p>Were the tips… black??</p><p>Abe opened his mouth to say something, but was roughly shoved by the back to make him let go of the door frame. Charlotte’s head, chest, and front paws were pressed out. She flopped out with her chest to the floor, along with Abe face-flat on his stomach, underneath her.</p><p>“Hey- <em> ow! </em>” He wriggled out from under her, and Charlotte blinked, feigning innocence.</p><p>“Sorry.” Wilford muttered, but he didn’t sound very sorry. Charlotte backed into Wilford’s room again, and the door slammed shut with a feeling of finality.</p><p><b><em>Wilford?</em></b> Charlotte asked, once they heard Abe trudge off. <b><em>Why are you acting funny…? Are you hurt?</em></b></p><p>“No… at least, I don’t <em> t</em><span class="u"><em>hink </em> so?</span>” He reached up and patted her nose. “It’ll be okay, sweetheart.”</p><p>She nosed his hand, sighing a little bit. <b> <em>I hope so…</em></b></p><p>Wilford scratched at her chin for a moment, looking thoughtful.</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> So… the detective’s alive?</em></span>
</p><p>
  <em> Yep.</em>
</p><p><span class="u"><em>I thought…</em></span> he faltered for a moment. <span class="u"><em>I shot him. I shot him in the </em><b><em>heart.</em></b><em> He should be dead.</em></span></p><p>Wilford snorted audibly. <em>So should you, right?</em></p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> … That’s fair.</em></span>
</p><p>
  <em> What now? What are we supposed to do?</em>
</p><p>A shrug, and an uncomfortable noise. <span class="u"> <em> How should I know, this isn’t my house.</em></span></p><p>
  <em> Apartment.</em>
</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <b> <em>Whatever.</em></b></span>
</p><p>He glanced to see Charlotte staring at him.</p><p>“<span class="u">I… suppose I should introduce myself… my name is William,</span>” Will muttered. “<span class="u">Wilford and I are sharing right now.</span>”</p><p>Her head tilted. <b> <em>Is he okay?</em></b></p><p>Wilford smiled. “I am okay, sweetheart.”</p><p>Her tail wagged at that. <b> <em>Should I go tell-?</em></b></p><p>“<span class="u"><em>No-!</em></span> ” Wilford clasped his mouth. “I… <span class="u">no.</span>”</p><p>A head tilt. <b> <em>Why?</em></b></p><p>“<span class="u">It’ll only make them upset,</span>” William said.</p><p>“We don’t want to make them upset, do we?” Wilford asked her.</p><p><b> <em>No, but- Parent already seems… </em> </b>  Another screech from Dark. <b> <em>Funny.</em></b></p><p>“I guess that’s what we’re worried about…” Wilford looked down at the floor for a second. He looked up as if his new half was above him. “Right?”</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> Right. Who’s ‘Parent’?</em></span>
</p><p>
  <em> I believe you called them ‘Damien’?</em>
</p><p>
  <span class="u"> <em> He’s a they now?</em></span>
</p><p>Wilford shrugged lightly. <em> Sort of… They go by Dark now.</em></p><p><span class="u"> <em> Bully… </em> </span> William’s voice was quiet. <span class="u"> <em> Learn something new every day.</em></span></p><p>
  <em> Dark and Abe already know something’s up… what do you want to do?</em>
</p><p>Hesitation. Will almost seemed to still, and after a few minutes, Charlotte booped their shoulder with her nose. Will blinked and smiled weakly, patting her chest.</p><p>
  <b> <em>I’m sorry you’re sad. I don’t want you to be sad.</em></b>
</p><p>“<span class="u">I’m not,</span>” William said. It was weird hearing a slight different voice coming from Wilford’s mouth. “<span class="u">Everything is all… madness for now.</span>”</p><p>“It’ll be okay,” Wilford tried to assure them both. Charlotte’s tail wagged, but only a little bit. “We can figure it out.”</p><p>There was a quiet knock on the door. “<b>Wilford? May I come in for a moment…?</b>”</p><p>An intense, silent panic. Charlotte didn’t like the scared look on their face, and rested her head near Will’s leg. Wilford patted her absently. “Yeah- yeah, sure. Come on in!”</p><p>The doorknob jiggled a little before clicking open, and a beautiful, extremely nervous looking woman walked into the room.</p><p>Will felt their heart skip a beat.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0051"><h2>51. Kinda Funny, Kinda Sad</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>HI, YES, HELLO, WE ARE ALIVE AND STILL WORKING ON THIS FIC, WE HAVE NO IDEA WHEN WE'RE GONNA END IT, SO ENJOY THE RIDE WHILE IT LASTS!!! - Abby</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Will let out a soft gasp, and they were certain they were staring at her.</p><p>“<span class="u">My love,</span>” William whispered, breathless. He slid off the bed and sank onto his knees.</p><p>Dark’s eyes were wide, and she was frowning uncomfortably. “<b>Hello…</b>”</p><p>She didn’t come any closer. </p><p>    <em> You know her, too? </em></p><p>William was silent, like he didn’t know how to answer. Charlotte looked in between the two of them (three of them, really), letting out a little whine. Will got up to his feet, and just put a hand on her nose, and pushed her away harmlessly, staring into Dark’s eyes.</p><p>    “<b>Will…?</b>” She began, cautiously. Will took a slow step towards her.</p><p>    <em> Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what’re you-? </em></p><p>    “<span class="u">I thought you were gone.</span>”</p><p>    “<b>I’m right here…</b>” Her voice was quiet, cracking a little. He shuffled closer and reached out to her hand- she pulled away. “<b>Will, I- you’re not feeling well.</b>”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Are you kidding?</span>” Will smiled. “<span class="u">I’m feeling wonderful just by seeing you here.</span>”</p><p>She recoiled, like he’d drenched her in ice water. “<b>I- Will, my dear, this isn’t right.</b>”</p><p>    “My <em> what?? </em>” Will’s voice lilted, and Dark backed away. Charlotte stood by her, double checking that she wouldn’t block the door.</p><p>    “<b>I…</b>” her voice cracked. “<b>I can’t do this. Not right now, I-</b>”</p><p>She looked frightened. Of him or for him, they didn’t know. Nobody really knew. Will took her hand. “<b>I wanted to check on you, and…</b>”</p><p>    “<span class="u">I know,</span>” he said. “<span class="u">A <em> lot </em> has happened, love. Do you need a minute?</span>”</p><p>    “<b>I…</b>” She nodded a little bit, and he patted her hand lovingly.</p><p>    “<span class="u">It’ll be alright,</span>” Will quietly assured her. Dark looked like she wanted to believe him. “We can figure this out.”</p><p>    “<b>How do you know for sure?</b>” Dark’s eyes blinked a few times.</p><p>    “Who can ever know for sure? <span class="u"> We just do, love.</span>” They offered her a smile, and there was a light in Will’s eyes that Dark hadn’t seen in a long, long time. There was nothing necessarily bad about it- in the right light, it could even be comforting- but Dark still looked scared. </p><p>There were a few moments before she nodded, almost to herself. “<b>… I think you’re right, I do need a minute…</b>”</p><p>She gently pulled her hand away from him, turning to the door. Charlotte stood up and carefully got out of the room before Dark. </p><p>    <em> … What was </em> <b> <em>that</em> </b> <em> all about?!? </em>Wilford asked. William stared after her for a moment before answering. Both Wills had a small smile on their face.</p><p>    <span class="u"><em>She’s alive… she’s really here…</em></span> His thoughts were practically a whisper.</p><p>    <em> Do you want to sit down or something?</em></p><p>A pause. <span class="u"> <em> … Yes.</em></span></p><p>They plopped down on the bed with a soft huff. William was still smiling, and both of them felt decently happy.</p><p>    <span class="u"><em>She looks so lovely,</em></span> William thought wistfully.</p><p>    <em> Yeah, she does… What was her name again? </em></p><p>William sighed. <span class="u"> <em> Celine. </em> </span></p><p>There was a small ringing going through Wilford’s independent, totally-not-troubled-at-all brain at that name. He frowned a little bit.</p><p>    “<span class="u"> Why so glum?</span>” William asked. Wilford shrugged.</p><p>    “I dunno,” he said. “It’s all so… I dunno.”</p><p>Silence for a moment.</p><p>“<span class="u"> Different,</span>” William murmured. “<span class="u">It’s different now</span><span class="u">.</span>”</p><p>    “<em>Very,</em>” Wilford agreed, trying to think of <em> some </em> kind of normal conversation. “I hope this isn’t <em> too </em> different for you. It looked like you were in like… what, the 20s?”</p><p>    “<span class="u">1922.</span>”</p><p>    “So… a while ago.”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Oh, yes. In normal circumstances I would have died a long time ago.</span>” Cheery. William rolled over on the bed, staring at Wilford’s wall. “<span class="u">But… I’m sure you know that all this isn’t exactly normal, eh?</span>”</p><p>The two of them chuckled softly, but their heart wasn’t really in it. All of it was a whole other level of strange.</p><p>The Wills feet rocked from side to side, all fingers awkwardly twiddling. They were exhausted, but neither dared suggest they go back to sleep again.</p><p>William looked over to the desk against the window, noticing a strange round black metallic thing with a handle on top of it.</p><p>    “<span class="u">What’s that?</span>” He muttered. </p><p>Wilford hummed, blinking up at it. “What do <em> you </em> think it is?”</p><p>“<span class="u">I don’t know… an egg box.</span>”</p><p>“Egg box doesn’t have a handle…” Their face was smushed up against the pillow. “An’ I don’t own an egg box?”</p><p>“<span class="u">It looks like an egg,</span>” William muffled. “<span class="u">What is it really?</span>”</p><p>A non-committed grunt, and a little shrug. They slowly rolled off the bed and shuffled over to the desk to peer at the mystery object. Wilford’s spectacles slid a bit off of their nose, and they absently pushed it back up again.</p><p>Wilford blinked. He took the spectacles off, investigating them.</p><p>“<span class="u">Those are mine…</span>” William said. Wilford shrugged and put them back on. “I just thought they looked cool. Found them in my closet.”</p><p>“<span class="u">Oh. I thought I’d brought them here…</span>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged again. “You wanna know what a CD player is, or not?”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Yes.</span>”</p><p>A little smile, and Wilford fumbled around with his desk a little bit, finding his CDs. “Oh, haven’t heard this one in a while-”</p><p>He took a little silver disk out of its case, and opened the CD player to swap out Vol. 4.</p><p>    “You have those radio doo-hickeys that play music?” Wilford asked. “This thing is like that, but simpler.”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Oh?</span>”</p><p>    “With this, you get to choose what music you listen to. You put it in the thing, close it, and it takes care of the rest.”</p><p>A pause. “<span class="u">I’m going to pretend to understand.</span>”</p><p>    “You know how I feel <em> all </em> the time.”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Yes. I do.</span>” There was a little bit of warmth there. It made Wilford smile. “<span class="u">Well… work your magic, then, mister music man.</span>”</p><p>A snort before Wilford popped in the disk, muttering about “tracks” before pressing a little button on the device, and the machine did it’s thing. “There we are.”</p><p>Through William’s ears, a very unfamiliar beat was heard. It was upbeat, alien, futuristic. Could have been made yesterday, or thirty years ago, and he wouldn’t have ever known the difference.</p><p>    “<span class="u">What… what is this?</span>”</p><p>Wilford beamed.</p><p>    “<em>All around me are familiar faces, </em></p><p> <em> Worn out places, worn out faces. </em></p><p> <em> Bright and early for the daily races, </em></p><p> <em> Going nowhere, going nowhere…</em>”</p><p>
  
</p><p>Over in the hallway, Dark was currently having her own existential crisis.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0052"><h2>52. Tears For Fears Strikes Again</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>    “<b>Oh, shit… oh, </b> <b> <em>shit…</em></b>”</p><p>Charlotte inched her way out of the hall to take up all the space in the living room. Abe sat on the couch, silent.</p><p>    “… What the <em> fuck </em>was that?”  </p><p>Dark looked like she was going to be sick. Even though her skin was already gray, she looked much paler than before. “<b>Something is making him like this.</b>”</p><p>    “You <em> think?? </em>”</p><p>    “<b>I… don’t know what, and I don’t know why. But I don’t like it.</b>” Dark’s fingers twiddled the bottom of her shirt as she walked in the living room. “<b>Something I haven’t seen in a long time.</b>”</p><p>Abe looked a little confused, but he nodded- something had definitely happened to Will, and they could all see it. He just didn’t have enough to know what was happening. In fact, nobody did. “He seemed… different. Not harsher or anything, but, I wouldn’t exactly want to grab a beer with him right now.”</p><p>    “<b>Of course you wouldn’t, he just woke up. With TWO personalities.</b>”</p><p>Charlotte was uncharacteristically silent, head on her paws and ears drooping. The others were too wrapped in their musings to notice. Poor girl.</p><p>    “Do you think this is because of him? Mark, I mean?”</p><p>    “<b>Of course I do- I just don’t know why. What could he have to gain?</b>”</p><p>Abe leaned back with a long sigh. “Something that wouldn’t be gained at all?”</p><p>    “<b>Right.</b>”</p><p>They drifted back into a loud, loud silence. Charlotte let out a loud yawn, her tail brushing against Abe’s work table, rattling a few drink glasses.</p><p>    <b> <em>Don’t get why you’re so worried about this, Parent. Wilford wasn’t worried one bit.</em> </b></p><p>Dark pat her nose. “<b>It’s my job to worry, sweetheart. Even when he isn’t. Besides, I’m pretty sure he’s not </b> <b> <em>just</em> </b> <b> Wilford… for now, anyways.</b>”</p><p>    <b> <em>Yeah…</em> </b> <b>  </b>She whined a little bit.</p><p>Suddenly, Will’s bedroom door burst open, and they were screeching another song at the top of their lungs, looking like they were having the time of their life. “<span class="u"><em>-ELCOME TO YOUR LIFE, THERE’S NO TURNING BACK,</em></span> <em>EVEN WHILE WE SLEEP, WE WILL FIND YOU-</em>”</p><p>    “<b>Well, that didn’t take very long,</b>” Dark muttered, getting up to intercept Wilford before he could run into the table.</p><p>    “<span class="u"><em>-YOUR BEST BEHAVIOR, TURN YOUR BACK ON MOTHER NATURE-</em></span> <em>EVERYBODY WANTS TO RULE THE WORLD.</em>” A healthy round of giggles, something that Wilford really needed for a while.</p><p>    “<b>Will, do you want to sit down?</b>”</p><p>    “Which one?”</p><p>    “<b>… Both…? of…? You…?</b>”</p><p>    “<span class="u">How kind.</span>” Will’s foot tapped to the beat of the song in the other room. He eyed over at Abe, noticing him gripping on his knees. “You alright, Abe?”</p><p>Abe looked like he didn’t want to talk. “Peachy.”</p><p>    “<span class="u">If you say so, Detective.</span>”</p><p>    “Huh?”</p><p>A gentle smile. “Sure, duck.”</p><p>Abe’s complexion darkened, and he quickly turned away. Will plopped on the floor against Charlotte.</p><p>    “<b>Um- Will- you want to tell us what happened?</b>” Dark coaxed. Wilford blinked at her slowly, frowning a little bit.</p><p>    “I… dunno really. <span class="u">We had a strange dream,</span> then we woke up.”</p><p>    “We?” Abe asked. Will nodded sagely, and Abe leveled a strange look at him for a moment. “You sure you’re feeling okay, bud? You didn’t hit your head again, did you?”</p><p>    “Of course not, duck! <span class="u">Probably not.</span> Eh… maybe.” A little shrug, and Will leaned back against the couch. “I don’t <em>think </em>so, I’m feeling pretty fine. <span class="u">I’m not.</span>”</p><p>    “Okay, I’m hearing two different answers at once here,” Abe’s voice raised, and he stood up. “<em>What </em> is going on with you??”</p><p>    “I dunno.” A little shrug. “<span class="u">Why do <em>you</em> care, Detective?</span>”</p><p>Abe stared at him for a long time. “… I need a drink.”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Oh, can I have one?</span>” William asked. “<span class="u">I needed one since a whole night ago.</span>”</p><p>Abe waved a hand without looking at him, heading to the kitchen. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure.”</p><p>Will let out a long huff, sinking against Charlotte’s flank. They looked up at Dark. “<span class="u">Hello again, my dear.</span>”</p><p>    “<b>Hello, Will.</b>”</p><p>    “This is <em> weird, </em> right?”</p><p>    “<b>A little, yes.</b>” She didn’t want to look at him, but knew she had to.</p><p>He sighed, and smiled up at her. “We’re not gonna <span class="u">bite, you know.</span>”</p><p>    “<b>It’s just so strange that you do that,</b>” she mumbled. “<b>That you’re… both here.</b>”</p><p>    “Is that bad?” They asked, frowning a little bit. </p><p>    “<b>No, Will, I just- this isn’t… normal. A few hours ago, you were just… Wilford.</b>”</p><p>William’s expression fell, and he looked at the floor. His mustache drooped. “<span class="u">I thought you would have been happy to see me.</span>”</p><p>Charlotte looked at him pityingly. Dark hitched a breath. “<b>I </b> <b> <em>am,</em> </b> <b> it’s… it’s complicated right now.</b>”</p><p>    “<span class="u">Does it <em>have</em> to be, Celine?</span>” William asked, his voice wavering softly.</p><p>She stared at him for a moment, moistening her lips before letting out a long sigh. She walked over to him and crouched down, taking his hands. “<b>Will, I mean this in the gentlest way, but I’m not Celine anymore. I’m not Damien. I’m both, and I’m neither, and… there’s so much, seeing you, the both of you here. And you have Abe, and he’s confused, and he’s trying </b> <b> <em>so hard </em> </b> <b>to understand… just give it time. That’s all I ask.</b>”</p><p>Will hesitated before nodding. “<span class="u">Sure, Cel…</span> Dark.”</p><p>Dark let go of his hands.</p><p>    “<b>I’m going to check on Abe. Do you still want anything?</b>” Will nodded. “<b>Alright. Try not to set the apartment on fire or something.</b>”</p><p>Will saluted with a tiny smile. “<span class="u">Aye,</span> aye.”</p><p>Leaving Wilford- William- Will-whatever and Charlotte alone in the living room, Dark strolled into the kitchen to see Abe at the table, head in his hands. There was a glass in front of him, that looked like it had something in it over ten times.</p><p>    “<b>You look like shit.</b>”</p><p>    “Gee, thanks,” Abe said sarcastically. He glared at the glass.</p><p>    “<b>You know what I mean, Abe.</b>” She sat down next to him. “<b>Why are you angry?</b>”</p><p>    “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He took a sip. “Wilford has a fucking split personality right now.”</p><p>    “<b>He’s still </b> <b> <em>Will</em> </b> <b>. There’s just… more of him now to go around.</b>” Dark clasped her hands together.</p><p>    “There’s nothing <em> good </em>about this, Dark,” Abe muttered.</p><p>    “<b>Tell that to him.</b>” She pointed to the living room, where Will had found his film collection. He had the biggest grin, chattering away aimlessly to himself. “<b>He’s found a new friend. Even if that friend is himself.</b>”</p><p>    “<span class="u">IT HAS COLOR?!?</span> What, you didn’t know?”</p><p>    “<b>Case in point.</b>” She tried to hold back a smile.</p><p>    “… How the hell are you okay with this? All of your bullshit about his safety, and then this happens-” he pointed at Will, who had scooched off of the couch and was staring spellbound at the television- “and suddenly, you couldn’t care less!”</p><p>    “<b>Be </b> <b> <em>quiet,</em></b>” Dark hissed. “<b>He can still hear you.</b>”</p><p>    “Which one,” Abe asked flatly.</p><p>    “<b>Both,</b>” she answered back, just as flat. “<b>This is still Will. I would think that you’d take this in stride- you’ve been with him longer than I have.</b> ” The detective snorted. “ <b>Are you honestly feeling sorry for yourself? Again?</b>” </p><p>Abe didn’t answer her, and she huffed, glaring at him. She slapped her hands on the top of the table, making him flinch up at her. Her eyes were pitch black, stern. “<b>You think I’m made of stone, yes? That I don’t care about what’s happening here? This could go so many ways. He could get </b> <b> <em>hurt</em><em>,</em></b><b> or </b> <b> <em>you </em> </b> <b>could get hurt, and I’d </b> <b> <em>never </em> </b> <b>forgive myself if that happened.</b>” </p><p>She leaned in closer, and Abe stared up at her, eyes wide. Her voice lowered a little bit, but her expression was still serious. “<b>I get that this is freaking you out, that it’s not normal, but when has anything </b> <b> <em>ever</em> </b> <b> been normal? I can’t </b> <b> <em>do </em> </b> <b>this by myself, Abe.</b>”</p><p>Will was still patiently sitting in the living room, somewhat oblivious to the conversation.</p><p>    “<b>I don’t care what you have to do. Just… figure it out, Abe. For Will.</b>” She grabbed a full cup and walked away, handing it to Will before settling back down on the couch. Will barely noticed, looking at the screen in wonder.</p><p>Abe sat still, fingers slightly shaking around his glass. He looked away from the living room, feeling his face getting hot. <em> The </em><strong><b><em>fuck</em></b></strong> <em> did I get myself into? </em><strong><br/></strong></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Error's Note: And here is where you can pinpoint the exact moment Abe fell a little in love with Dark. :3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0053"><h2>53. Slowing Down</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Took this chapter's title seriously, I guess :|</p><p>We are alive once again! To make it up for those who are waiting for more of this, here's a long one!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><b><em>You want me to do what?</em></b> Charlotte stared up at Abe in confusion, her eyes big.</p><p>“I just want you to ask Wilford some questions, okay?” </p><p>
  <b> <em>But why can’t you just ask him, Stupid Friend?</em> </b>
</p><p>“Because he won’t <em> tell </em>me, Charlotte.”</p><p>Charlotte snorted a little bit, resting her head on her paws. <b> <em>Well, that’s not really </em> </b> <b>my </b> <b> <em>fault, is it?</em> </b></p><p>They had been having this same conversation for about… twenty minutes now. “Can you just- nevermind. Fine. I’ll do it myself.”</p><p><b> <em>I thought Will wasn’t going to tell you.</em> </b> She sounded helpful. Abe huffed. <b> <em>But sure, have fun.</em> </b></p><p>Abe shook his head, walking away from the dog.</p><p>There had to be an explanation for why Wilford was acting so strange. There was always an explanation for these sorts of things, right? But whenever Abe brought it up, ‘William’ would always jump in. Such as-</p><p>“Hey, Wilford,” Abe greeted sullenly. Will was trying to skirt past him to get to the kitchen.</p><p>“Hi, duck. <span class="u"> Please move.</span>”</p><p>The detective sighed, shuffling out of the way. “Sorry.”</p><p>“<span class="u">No harm done.</span>” William paused to scratch Charlotte’s fur, causing her tail to thump. The table rattled. “Are you hungry? I was going to fix something up ‘cause I forgot to eat breakfast again. <span class="u">It’s a nasty habit.</span>”</p><p>“… No, I’m good, Wilford.”</p><p>“<span class="u">If you’re sure.</span>” One more scratch for Charlotte, and then he walked away, mumbling something about eggs. “<span class="u">You think if we throw some at him so much, he’ll turn into an egg himself?</span> I don’t know… I’ve love to try!”</p><p>Abe frowned. <em> I can hear you, </em> <b> <em>ass.</em> </b></p><p>An audible blowing-raspberry sound filled Abe’s head. Then a round of giggling from the two- from Wilford. Abe physically cringed.</p><p>“<span class="u">I mean, he already has the appearance of one,</span>” William mused. Wilford continued to laugh. </p><p>
  <em> Yes, I get it, I’m bald. </em>
</p><p>Neither- Wilford didn’t seem to hear him. That, or he was just ignoring Abe. Behind them, Charlotte looked like she was trying not to smile. </p><p>And that was a normal enough morning now at the nutso apartment. Dark had somewhat taken over Abe’s office (with his permission), a sleeping cot placed in the corner. All in all a bit cramped, but Abe didn’t really mind. At least nobody was fighting.</p><p>For now, anyway.</p><p>Abe would try to find things to keep him busy, mostly by revisiting old cases that may have recently opened back up. Dark would come in sometimes with coffee and fresh perspective. Wilford was on a cartoon binge-fest, watching anything and everything that he and his companion were in the mood for. There hadn’t been any arguments, mostly because no one really had the energy to start one.</p><p>In the kitchen, Wilford was muttering to himself yet again. “<span class="u">So, tell me again why the sponge fellow likes to bother the octopus?</span> Squidward? <span class="u">Yes, yes, the one with tentacles. He seems to prefer the shut-in lifestyle. You would have to wonder what the sponge’s goal is, constantly bothering a creature like that.</span>”</p><p>He messed with the stove for a few moments before successfully turning on a burner. Triumphant, William started looking for a small pan.</p><p>“Eeeeehhhhhmmmm… SpongeBob just likes Squidward. <span class="u">What?</span> SpongeBob likes Squidward. <span class="u">Why? He clearly shows no love towards the sponge. Why wouldn’t he have taken the hint?</span>”</p><p>Wilford shrugged. “Because he finds Squidward interesting? Because in the first few seasons Squidward actually seems to reluctantly enjoy doing things with him? Because the plot itself demands it?”</p><p>Wilford grabbed a small pan from under the counter, haphazardly plunking it down on the burner. He went over to the fridge to grab some eggs before muttering, “You in the mood for pancakes, or French toast?”</p><p>“<span class="u">Bully… hadn’t had those in a while,</span>” William said. Wilford smiled. “Both it is!”</p><p>And that was that. The simple inquiry, the answer, and then back to the happy, idle chatter. It made Abe’s brain want to melt. It made him want to scream, but Dark made an “<b><em>I’ve got my eye on you, so behave</em></b>” gesture earlier, so there are no chances of that ever happening. Apparently it would be better to let Wilford make himself go crazy ( <em> more </em> crazy?) than to ever question it. Abe sighed over by the dog, and Charlotte looked like she wanted to roll her eyes at him.</p><p>
  <em> How is this not making your brain melt??? </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>What?</em> </b>
</p><p>
  <em> THAT. </em>
</p><p>Wilford was staring intently at a Bisquick box, like he’d never seen instant pancakes before. Of course, William probably had never seen instant pancakes before.</p><p><b><em>Maybe he’s reading the ingredients. You can find some funny stuff on there.</em></b> Not the most helpful, perhaps, but she wasn’t wrong. While Abe wasn’t looking, Wilford had started whipping up an egg-cream-cinnamon mixture, and was in the process of soaking French bread in it.</p><p>When had he gotten the French bread…?</p><p>Bafflingly, Will was also mixing together the pancake mix, with a healthy bit of cocoa powder. How he could eat so much in one sitting, Abe had never understood.</p><p>“Abe, you wanna come help??” Wilford asked, breaking Abe out of his thoughts.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Will’s voice then went quiet to louder again. “<span class="u">Are you sure about this? I’d rather not let him…</span> It’ll be okay. C’mon, Abe!”</p><p>Charlotte glances at Abe. <b> <em>You wanna join him?</em> </b></p><p>Abe stared at Will in a furious but silent debate, before eventually he walked over. Will offered him the whisk with a smile.</p><p>Abe hesitated. <em> Looks like I don’t have a choice, do I. </em></p><p><em> Nope. </em>Wilford’s smile widened. Abe forced a smile for him, only for it to fade as he noticed the small black tips on Wilford’s mustache.</p><p>“Have you been messing around with hair dye again?” The detective questioned, which caused a tiny frown.</p><p>“You know I don’t dye my mustache, Abe! This is all natural!” This was a rather sore subject for Wilford, and was something Abe had pondered about many times over the years. Will was always meticulous about his appearance. Seeing the black back in his ‘stache… it was strange, to be the least.</p><p>“Really, Abe, you should know better,” he chided. “<span class="u">You’ve been here longer than I.</span>”</p><p>Abe cringed. “Yeah. Sure.”</p><p>He only just noticed he hasn’t taken the whisk out of Will’s hand. Blushing a little bit, he snatched it. William snickered.</p><p>“<span class="u">Now then… French toast?</span>” Will’s face warped to a wider smile. “French pancakes~.”</p><p>He bounced a little on his heels before furiously stirring the pancake mix again. Abe stood still, almost scowling.</p><p>“Anything else?” He asked flatly.</p><p>“<b>Oh, </b> <b> <em>god,</em></b>” Dark was suddenly heard from down the hall. She sounded very annoyed. “<b>Why am I even surprised.</b>”</p><p>Warmly, Will smiled again, voice distorting and wobbling. “<span class="u">Celine!</span> Dark!”</p><p>Dark’s hair was ruffled, with fluffy bits sticking out from random directions. The left side of her face had small imprints on her skin.</p><p>“What <span class="u"> happened</span> to <span class="u"> your</span> face?” Will blurted, setting the mixture down on a counter. The bowl wobbled a little bit. Dark strained a small smile.</p><p>“<b>I just took a nap,</b>” she said. “<b>Then I smelled something in the kitchen. Waffles?</b>”</p><p>Abe opened his mouth to answer.</p><p>“French pancakes,” Wilford answered instead. “<span class="u">Would you like one when we’re done, dear?</span>”</p><p>Dark wiped one of her eyes. “<b>Maybe. I don’t need to eat, but maybe.</b>”</p><p>“<span class="u">You’ll like it,</span>” William assured her. “<span class="u">I put some chocolate in it.</span>”</p><p>Abe frowned a little bit, both at the interruption and this additional information. “When did you have time to do that?”</p><p>“After I put in the chopped pecans!” Was the cheery reply. Why was Abe even surprised?</p><p>Abe proceeded to do what he would normally do if Wilford- Will- Whatever, was acting like this, go along with it. He surely didn’t want to, he had a <em> lot </em> of questions going on in his head, but he ignored them. Now wasn’t the time to antagonize Will anyway, he was in such a good mood.</p><p>The pan was done preheating, and Will started to ladle out the mix with a satisfying hiss. Each one was ginormous, and Dark peeked over their shoulder to look at the stove. “<b>Are you sure they’re the right size?</b>”</p><p>“<span class="u">Mmmm… maybe?</span>” Will nodded. “Absolutely!”</p><p>“They’re really thin, though,” Abe muttered, pointing at the pan. “One of them’s already bubbling.”</p><p>Will absently swat at his hand, chiding, “You <span class="u"> hush,</span> backseat <span class="u"> baker.</span>”</p><p>“<b>The burner’s on too high,</b>” Dark said. Will checked the burner. It was on too high.</p><p>“<span class="u">You are absolutely right,</span>” William said, making a finger gun. “Lemme just fix that.”</p><p>Abe scowled.</p><p>“<b>They’re still burning.</b>”</p><p>“They’re still thin.”</p><p>For a moment, everything felt exactly the same for Abe- the teasing, the long hours he and Will spent trying to figure out how to cook back when they’d first moved in together. Will’s weird experiments that came out looking strange but still tasting okay… he hardly ever did that anymore.</p><p>When had they stopped doing all that? When had he stopped coming in to watch Will, despite knowing the man would always end up making a mess? Was it when he’d started obsessing after the dia-</p><p>“Shit!” Will had tried to flip one of the pancakes only for it to fold in half, wet side sticking to itself. There was a little frown under the bushy moustache, and an even smaller furrow of his brow.</p><p>“<b>You’re going too fast,</b>” Dark corrected gently, reaching for the burner again. She took the spatula from his hand.</p><p>Abe leaned against the counter, only just remembering he still has the whisk in his hand. He crossed his arms with it anyway, glaring down at his feet. At the edge of his eye, he saw Charlotte’s tail flop against the floor. <b> <em>You’re jeeeeaaaaaalllllooooouuuuussss~...</em> </b></p><p>Abe’s face heated up, and he scrunched his nose. <em> Am not. </em></p><p><b><em>Yes you are, yes you are!</em></b> Charlotte crowed. She looked rather pleased with herself.</p><p>
  <em> I am NOT. </em>
</p><p>“H<span class="u">u</span>h?” Will and Dark glanced over at him. The Detective scowled even more.</p><p>“Nothing.”</p><p>Dark kept her eyes on him until Wilford popped in. “You think we could do pancake art with all this next time?”</p><p>“<b>Well, why not?</b>” Dark asked in a friendly voice. She shot a quick little smile to Abe, and sympathetically thought, <b> <em>You look frustrated.</em> </b></p><p>
  <em> Wow, what gave you that impression? </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>That sour look on your face, my dear Detective.</em> </b>
</p><p>Will was currently in the process of trying to bake egg-cream-soaked French bread in the microwave, oblivious to the whole affair.</p><p>
  <em> I’m fine. </em>
</p><p>
  <b> <em>I thought you weren’t supposed to be saying that anymore?</em> </b>
</p><p>With a deep sigh, Abe rolled his eyes. “I’m going to my office.”</p><p>“Aww, are you sure?” Wilford asked, sticking a finger of syrup in his mouth. He then shrugged. “<span class="u">Go on ahead. Three is a crowd.</span>”</p><p>Dark cleared her throat at that.</p><p>“Yep, sure, I know, got it,” Abe dismissively waved his hand as he wandered off past Charlotte.</p><p>Wilford shot a look at Dark after Abe left the room. “Any idea what that was about?”</p><p>She shrugged, looking down at the sink. Will had absently plunked all of the dirty dishes there throughout the whole process, and it was a mess. “<b>He’s stressed out. This… hasn’t been easy for him.</b>”</p><p>“<span class="u">Why?</span>”</p><p>“<b>… William, don’t make me answer that,</b>” she said tiredly. His head tilted a little, and he made a frown.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> How can he not see what’s right in front of him? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Hush. You were slow when you first woke up, too. Give William time. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Will pushed out a sigh through his lips. <span class="u"><em>I don’t know how you can be friends with such a short-tempered man.</em></span> <em>Hey, Abe’s not that bad! You just gotta give him a chance… eh, sure, he’s a little grumpy today, but I’m sure that’ll pass.</em></p><p>Both Wills rolled their eyes. <span class="u"> <em> He’s beginning to get on my nerves. Skirting past with that look on his face… it’s like he thinks I’ve wronged him. </em> </span></p><p><em>To be fair, </em>Wilford pointed out wryly, <em>you DID shoot him. And kill him for several hours. </em><span class="u"><em>He tazed you.</em></span> <em>Ha, he tazed the both of us, really. </em><span class="u"><em>… Well, you’re not wrong.</em></span></p><p>Dark’s voice perked Will’s ear.</p><p>“<b>Would you give me a minute, Will?</b>” she asked. “<b>I want to see how Abe is doing.</b>”</p><p>“<span class="u">You saw him,</span>” William said. “<span class="u">He’s a stick in the mud. Knee deep.</span> Nice analogy! You can go on, Dark. We’ve got this.”</p><p>She smiled thinly, and left them to their cooking. Quietly, she followed Abe to his office.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A NEW COLLAB WITH AskError87!!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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